Disclaimer: Don't own

Pairings: 1x2, side 3x5

Warnings: men kissing men, hints of sexual situations, some sapness, light angst, some bad language, touches of humour.

A/N: Inspired by the song Laura Palmer by Bastille. Beta'd by ELLE. Previously posted on tumblr. Posting now as I have been posting far too much angst. So have some fluff!

This is Your Heart

The stolen mobile suit carrier landed in the Preventer airfield, slowing down on the runway, the engines creating a breeze that ruffled my hair as I watched it come to a halt.

Wufei stood beside me, his arms folded across his chest as he watched with the same anxiety I had, though neither of us showed it outwardly. We had both gone through the same range of feelings over the last few days – the clenching horror of knowing that communication had been lost with two undercover operatives, agents Shadow and Knight respectively, after the last transmission had come from inside an illegal mobile suit manufacturing plant that had exploded. That transmission had been only minutes before the explosion was recorded on the satellite feeds and there was no possible way that they could not have been inside during the blast.

I was told to go to the tactical division, saw the information on large screens, and was joined minutes later by Wufei as we were told Duo and Trowa were now MIA. There was a moment where my heart stopped and then I nodded, confirmed I understood as we were told the local team would assess the site and see the likelihood of survival.

I didn't leave Preventer HQ that night – neither did Wufei – as we waited for any confirmation either way. We ate pizza that tasted like cardboard in our mouths in his office – more luxurious than mine as he was a commander whereas I was an analyst – and we sat in silence, eating mechanically as we both knew we had to eat but neither wanting to when the men we loved may be lying dead among the rubble of a factory.

Wufei and I had never been close – we perhaps always had the shadow of our battle during the Barton rebellion in our relationship – but in that moment I appreciated his calmness, the offer of solidarity in these moments.

"They're not dead," Wufei said and I was not sure if he was convincing himself or me. "They'll come back."

I looked him in the eye then – saw a weariness that he was masking underneath his calm exterior. Many people did not know Trowa and Wufei were a couple – their relationship kept private due to their natures – they were not ashamed of it, rather they did not do public displays of affection but I had seen the subtle gestures that showed the depth of their feelings for each other. I perhaps could see them as they mirrored myself and Duo.

They'll come back, he had said and all I could do was reply with hopeful words.

"They always do."

They always had. They worked well together and I trusted Trowa more than anyone to have Duo's back. Something I couldn't do as I never wanted to fight again after Mariemaia but I knew Duo wanted that still – wanted to feel useful and invincible. I would never let my feelings colour his own wants and desires. I never stood in his way. But as I spent those agonising hours, waiting for confirmation, waiting for something,I felt when he got back, when he was back in my arms, I would tell him how I felt. How I couldn't stand another time where I would say goodbye to him and not know whether he would return. I wondered if Wufei felt the same.

When finally the rear exit of the carrier opened, I held my breath as I saw Duo for the first time in weeks – a mixture of relief and concern washing over me. The bandaging was concerning. Their comms had indicated they had both suffered injury, the letters WIA burned into my retinas but that was better than killed in action. It was over the top of his head, one eye completely covered and some evident bruising and abrasions littering his face, his forearms, some covered with gauze, other's showing against his pale skin.

But he was walking and I couldn't help walking towards him, a twisted version of a romance novel or the sort of movies I had been subjected to once with Relena's daughter. The instant he was in touching distance I reached for him, unable to say how I felt, and instead intending to show.

I kissed him hard, pulling him close to me and thinking 'fuck it' to those watching – Wufei and Trowa included as well as the ground crew – as I devoured his mouth, putting the hell of the last few days to rest by finding solace in his lips, in running my fingers over his back, his braid, feeling him tight against my chest. I had never been one for public displays of affection myself but after the last few days… Those hours where I contemplated my life without him, where I sat with Wufei in an office in silence until the message came through, scrambled, weak, but indisputable proof. Alive. Wounded but alive. I released his lips, glanced over to the men beside us.

Wufei greeted Trowa back with more reservation, a subtle touch of hands, a look into each other's eyes that said volumes without the display we made. I would blame Duo entirely for that – he brought things out of me that I never thought were possible and this was one of those occasions. Though, while they showed nothing on the surface, Duo knew far too much, having gotten Trowa drunk in an undercover in the slums of Mexico City. There was talk of Tantric sex. And how many hours it lasted. Five was apparently a record. And a threat to buy us a book on the subject when Duo teased or acted like a dick.

Duo just gave me a smirk about it. "Babe, don't worry, you know I'd be too impatient for that."

It hadn't stopped me looking at them ever so slightly differently since then.

I looked back at him, the bandage around his head, covering his eye. There was an obvious question there, not having to articulate the thought.

"Tro' says it looks bad," he said, a hint of bravado, "probably gonna lose sight. Shrapnel an' all."

My eyes met Trowa's who nodded in confirmation – his knowledge of field medicine superior to the rest of us but I didn't care what wounds Duo had suffered – only that I could feel his heart beating in his chest as he was so close to me, his breath across my face.

"Been taking hair advice from Tro' on the way back… could always do the uni-bang thing then you wouldn't see it's fucked," he said.

I gave him a sceptical look that conveyed my feeling on the subject. I tried to imagine a lock of hair obscuring his face and I ran my thumb against his cheek underneath the bandage. "You could have an eye patch," I suggested.

His face split into a wide grin. "So I could be a sexy pirate?"

I knew what he was doing – trying to make a joke out of the situation and I thought of what I wanted to say – that I didn't want to watch him leave on missions to fuck knew where for weeks at a time but I didn't. I just kissed him one more time, my heart racing in my chest and answered.

"Yeah… a sexy pirate."