"Welcome to Chez Gibbs!" Tony called merrily to the team as they arrived.
"Tony?" McGee looked to his right curiously.
Tony's head appeared around the edge of a curtain that had been hung between the kitchen and entry on what looked like a shower rod. It also appeared to hold a shower curtain, but it was very Christmassy and cheerful. ""Dinner will be served shortly. Coats to the small room in the left corner of the living room. Drinks and appetizers are on the coffee table. Jackson has offered to play bartender. Please, help yourself and ignore the Grinch on your right."
Jethro threw a 'very funny' look at his senior agent, before saying drolly. "And pay no attention to the man behind the curtain."
"Meow." Tony made a slashing paw motion and disappeared behind the curtain.
"May I be of assistance, Anthony?"
"Everything is under control. Just mingle. Enjoy yourselves."
"Can Tony cook?" McGee asked Jimmy.
"He can. The question should be, 'Can he cook well?'," Abby interjected. "Ummm... Gibbs?" A lifted eyebrow was the only response from their host. "Shouldn't you be helping?"
"Apparently, my 'grinchiness' is impacting on the 'flavor' of the dishes. Therefore, I have been," Gibbs raised his voice, "...exiled from my own kitchen."
"Will you wear the apron?" A loud retort came back.
"Apron?" Gibbs glared at Jimmy and Breena pulled him to the far side of the room.
The loud noise of shattering glass made everyone in the living room freeze. "Everything's fine. Don't come in. Just need a bandage."
"Dear boy, may I come in?"
"No, Ducky! I'm fine." Tony muttered, "Mostly."
"For the love of heaven, Leroy. Aren't you being a bit childish?"
"Dad, he hung a shower curtain in the doorway."
"Well, yeah, you wouldn't let him put up a curtain rod. He wants the table to be a surprise."
"Curtains do not belong in doorways."
"Actually, my boy, ..." Ducky received a full Gibbs glare. "I'll think I'll talk to Abby."
"If he finds out you are glaring at the guests," Jackson growled.
"I'm allowed to glare at who I want in my house."
"Don't give me that lip, Leroy Jethro. You're not too old for me to dust your britches."
"Ouch!" Tony's yelp was immediately followed by him yelling, "I'm fine."
"Leroy Jethro, get into that kitchen now."
"No."
Jackson crossed his arms. "If you do not get in that kitchen, I will dye your drawers pink and starch them so stiff you won't be able to sit for a year." Jackson growled, "Now."
"Everything okay, Jackson?" Tony peered around the curtain.
"Just fine, son. Leroy's decided to help you in the kitchen after all."
Tony smiled brightly. "Great." Jethro moved slowly throwing one last glare over his shoulder to his father. "Don't let them peek." The curtain was quickly closed behind the reluctant man.
Jackson snickered. "Serves him right."
"Jackson, I suspect your motivation." Ducky walked up to him holding a cup of eggnog.
"He's been as grumpy as a dog with his tail in a rocker all week." Jackson explained. "Pooh-poohed everything that boy has wanted to do. Didn't want a tree. Didn't want any decorations. Didn't want Christmas music. No Christmas movies. If I had been Tony, I would have hit him so hard up along the head that Jethro would still be spinning."
"We were a bit surprised by the invitation to dinner." Jimmy said his arm around his wife's waist.
"Well, Jethro was dead set against that, too. Tony didn't say a word." Jackson recalled. "Just walked out of the room. I was watching a ball game when he wheeled his bag through the living room." He laughed. "Jethro asked just where he thought he was going. Tony told him, home. Said he was grateful to Leroy for letting him stay after the gunshot, but he wasn't going to spend the holidays with a fun-miser; that he'd done enough of that with Senior. Tony told Leroy he was going back to his condo, putting up a tree and inviting his family for a holiday dinner."
Abby blotted at her shirt where she had snorted her drink. "He actually called Gibbs a 'fun-miser'?"
"Yep. It got good then. Leroy asked Tony how he planned to get up the steps at his apartment, if he was going to borrow a reindeer."
Abby giggled at the thought.
"Tony told him that since he'd already been helped by an ass; a reindeer wouldn't be a far stretch." Jackson chortled. "Leroy told him it'd take more than a few of Santa's elves to carry him up. That's when Tony lowered the boom."
Tim, Abby, Ducky, Jimmy and Breena leaned in closer. They couldn't imagine anything topping the fun-miser or ass comment.
"He told Leroy that all he needed was his phone and fifteen minutes and he would have twenty good-looking marines on the front lawn who would not only carry him home, up the stairs but fight over who got to take him to bed."
"Oh, my," Ducky looked shocked. "I didn't expect Tony to be so forward."
"I think it's more desperation, Ducky." Tim said. "Tony has been giving off hints for months. Gibbs has been a bit... well..."
"Clueless?" Breena suggested.
"Didn't he notice the marines coming to pick Tony up at work?"
"He told me that Tony appeared to have made several new friends to play basketball." Ducky sighed.
"No..." Abby looked shocked. "Poor Tony."
"Poor Leroy." Jackson countered. "He looked like someone smacked him with a dead mackerel."
"Oh, dear." Ducky said distressed. "How did he stop Tony from leaving?"
Jackson flushed. "I may have stepped in. Told Leroy to quit being a grouch and told Tony to stop being a drama queen. Sent them both to their rooms for the night. Spent the night on the couch and dared them both the leave their rooms."
"You go, grandpa Gibbs," Abby toasted him.
"Next morning, I let Leroy sneak out a bit early. He came back with that and some decorations." He gestured at the tree. "A pack of invitations, a few Christmas music CDs and a few movies on DVDs. Then he went and hid in the basement for the rest of the day."
"What about the marines?"
"Leroy is choosing to employ selective memory."
"Jackson, what are they fighting about today?"
"Tony decided it would be fun to be 'festive' while preparing dinner. Got them aprons to wear." Jackson admitted.
"An apron?"
"Gibbs doesn't seem the apron type," Jimmy concluded.
"Especially that one." Jackson confirmed. "Oh, no," He held up one hand. "I am not spoiling Tony's surprise."
Tony's head appeared again. Then he stepped out in his reindeer apron. "Ladies and gentlemen, dinner is served." With one hand on the curtain, he stepped sideways opening the doorway. The table was perfectly Tony; bright, colorful dinnerware, fun centerpieces and elegant crystal accents. At each place, a traditional Christmas cracker waited for them.
The group applauded as they moved forward and then came to a stop.
"The first person to say one word, is on dumpster duty for the year." Jethro growled as he stood there in his elf apron.
Tony whapped him behind the head. "No threats. No fun-miser." Tony continued walking past to help seat the ladies and Jethro snarled at his back. "I saw that."
"Anthony, dear boy, where did you find authentic Christmas crackers? They are so large, much larger than the ones I remember."
"Actually, Ducky, Mr. Grinch found them."
"I loved these when I was a boy."
"Shall we?" Gibbs picked up the cracker off Tony's plate and held it out to his tormentor.
Tony smiled brightly as the cracker 'exploded' until pieces of plastic and electronics spilled out along with a new smart phone, a wood ring and a piece of white paper which Jethro motioned him to read out loud and Tony did so in shock. "Here's your new phone. This is your home. I bought you music. I gave you a tree. If you want a marine, it'll be me."
Jackson burst out laughing. Who said his boy was clueless?