Harry and Draco fighting over blankets in bed
"Yes, right there. Oh, yeah, that's good, Potter... Mmmh."
"God, Malfoy. You're so demanding!"
"Whatever. Harder, dammit, do it harder."
"You're so soft and warm."
"It feels so good. Yessss."
"Well, I have been scratching your back for nearly three minutes now, so it better feel fucking good."
"Don't whine so much, Harry."
"I fucking hate your seductive voice, Draco. You're gonna make me hard again."
"Sorry, I'm out of commision."
"Well, I would fuck myself raw if I fucked you again. Your hole's safe Draco."
"Thanks so ever much. Now, I wanna sleep. Give me the blankets."
"No way!"
"Yes way!"
"You hoarded them last night. Again!"
"I need the warmth, Harry. You know my body temperature is generally lower."
"Bullshit, Draco. You're just a hypochondriac."
"Am not!"
"Am too! You thought you had cancer when you started coughing. Cancer can't even grow in wizards. Besides, it's my time to have the blankets."
"You should buy your own blankets. These are mine."
"Your blankets? Did we not receive them as a shared wedding present?"
"You know that that's not true. Really, all the presents were, sorry, are mine."
"That's not what you said on our wedding day."
"..."
"You said the bride only really gets the presents."
"I'm sure I didn't say that. You're getting deaf in your old age."
"Old age? I was 23 when we married."
"Terribly old. Nearly dead. Are you going blind as well?"
"Don't change the subject, Draco. You just implied you were the woman in this relationship! Ha!"
"Technically there are no women in this relationship. That's why it's a homosexual marriage. Get on with the definitions, Harry."
"Whatever Draco. You're the woman in our relationship."
"My cock's larger than yours!"
"Don't you mean clitoris?"
"Ew. Don't be perverse."
"So you're giving up then?"
"We should ban that word. Clitoris. Gross."
"Draco!"
"I'll never give up these blankets! If spooning is not enough for you, you don't even deserve the blankets!"
"Spooning is perfectly fine for me... especially when I can get my cock into your arse... But you always scoot away!"
"That's because you don't hold me tight enough."
"..."
"Nevermind. Here. Take the blankets."
"Draco..."
"Get that wand away from me!"
"Ha, I bet you like this, don't you?"
"What on earth have you done?"
"I incarceroused us together. Now you'll stay close to me all night."
"What if I have to go to the loo?"
"Too bad. I'll have to follow you."
"Kinky..."
"Draco, stop kissing me. We're supposed to sleep!"
"And yet you whine again."
"Ha, ha."
"Hold me tight?"
"Always."
"Can you try not to snore this time?"
"I love you, Draco."
"I love you, Harry."
"'Night."
"'Night."
"Blanket."
"Oh. Right. Fucking Gryffindor."