Ahh! FINALLY! It's up. Yay :D Well, here's the story that I promised you guys. Hope you guys like the first bit of it *fingers crossed*
Thank you to the one and only JellyBeane for editing my story :P
Disclaimer: Do not own Twilight.
Change is not to be a friend, but something to fear.
I'm not big on change. In fact, I hate it.
I hate how one day, everything is perfect and the next, it all just comes crashing down - all rubble and dust, never going to be the same no matter how much you try to glue it back together.
I hate how you were customized by a routine that's never been broken in years, but suddenly stops when you miss it most.
Yes, I hate change. Up until 7 years ago, my life was close to perfect.
I remember mum use to always tell me: "You're either a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean." Meaning, change takes a toll on you. A potato is rock hard and solid, but if you put it in boiling water, it's soft and fragile. An egg is delicate and easily broken, but in boiling water, it's tough and strong. A coffee bean adapts to boiling water and becomes liquid.
Potato, egg, or coffee bean.
I remember I loved ballet. When I was five, I was determined to fly.
"Mandy! Don't do it! This is stupid!"
I looked out across the horizon, flock of birds' flying- tempting me to join them. I ignored my best friend from down below, begging me to stop.
His chocolate eyes were pleading me to stop and come back down.
I smirked. Poor naive, Seth.
I was currently on top of a tree, my pink fairy wings strapped securely on my back. Today was the day I'll fly.
"Mandy, please! You're going to hurt yourself!"
I ignored his pleads and chants, focused on my balance and up at the sky. I spread my arms next to me, ready to fly. I started flapping them, bending my knees.
I looked below and saw Seth with two of his front teeth missing, looking anxiously up at me.
"Ready, Seth? I'm going to fly!" I yelled below.
Seth shook his head, worry outlining his face.
I bent my knees again and took off. I jumped of my branch feeling the cold wind push against me, making my hair whip all over my face.
I remember the wind enveloping me into a cold hug, feeling like gravity had no chance with me. I remember the rush of adrenaline flow though me, making me smile.
I was finally flying!
But, that was short lived. Gravity was not my friend.
After I jumped off, I heard the whoosh of the wind and Seth's gasp and a thud!
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I broke my left wrist.
After weeks of hearing Seth's taunts and I-told-you-so's, I found out about ballet.
I remember watching the ballerinas dance ever so gracefully across the stage, focused and synchronised. But that wasn't what caught my attention. What caught my attention was the fact that they can leap really high. So high, it was like they were flying.
After months of begging mum and dad, they caved in and enrolled me in the local ballet school.
I absolutely loved it. Closest thing I could get to flying.
So you could tell why I was so mad and fought with my mum when she said she couldn't make it to my ballet recital.
I was now 10 years old, throwing a tantrum and slamming doors because mum couldn't make it to my dance because she had work.
"Mum! This is SO unfair!"
"Mandyline please, I'll try to make it, but my boss really needs me," Mum begged from the other side of the door.
"I worked all year for this!" I yelled back.
"I know, sweetie. And I really am sorry..."
I was so mad that night, I didn't come out my room, didn't even bother to say goodnight to mum.
But then, I got a phone call from mum saying she could make it after all. I was still a bit angry at her, but was at least happy that she could watch me.
When the show finally started, I was fuming again. The seat that reserved for my mum was still empty. I remember the hot streaks of tears running down my face. She promised she'd be here, but she never came. She said she could make it!
I remember being so angry, I didn't dance. Instead I ran.
I ran to Seth's house that day, crying and red faced. I remember running into his arms, and him stroking my back making excuses for my mum.
"Maybe she was running late..."
"Mandy, you're overreacting..."
"Maybe something came up at the last minute..."
Excuses, excuses.
It was when Sue (Seth's mum) let me stay over that night (I didn't want to face my mum), that she got the phone call.
"Mandy?" Sue knocked on Seth's door before entering.
Seth and I were all tucked into bed after our share of hot chocolate.
I immediately sat up, looking up to Sue's face. She was crying.
She knelt next to me and hugged me.
"Mum? What's wrong?" Seth asked with concern.
Sue pulled me in front of her, and stroked my cheek. Her tears were running down her face fast.
"Mandy... It's your mum," She sobbed.
I tilted my head to the side. Did mum want me home?
"What?" I asked, panicking.
"She... had..." She started crying again, shaking her head.
"She had what?" Seth and I asked. My heart increased dramatically. She was starting to scare me.
"...an accident," Sue finished quietly.
It took me a minute to process this.
"Accident?" I asked. I pulled away from Sue's grip. "What kind of accident?"
"Car accident..." Sue looked up at me and brushed away a few tears that I didn't realise had escaped.
"Mandy, I'm so sorry. She didn't make it."
With those few words, I bolted.
I remember running to the house to find it dark and empty. I remember yelling for my mother and saying that I was sorry for being so mad. I remember curling myself to a ball and crying on her bed, smelling the last of my mum's scent that was still lingering on the sheets.
I remember thinking, this was my entire fault.
If I didn't tell my mum to go to my recital, she wouldn't have died. If I didn't start ballet, this would've never happened.
I remember dad not looking at me the same anymore. I remember hearing his sobs between the walls when he thought I was sleeping. I remember him getting fired because he wasn't focused enough on the job.
But most of all, I remember being angry with mum. I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye or "I love you." Suddenly, the thought of ballet recitals and thinking I could fly were useless.
Yes, I hated change. I quit ballet because it was too painful. Every time I danced, images of my mum and I fighting replays in my head right after the words of "These were your last moments together."
I hated how I was a stubborn child. I didn't want to spend my last days with mum fighting.
After mum died, all I received from people was sympathy. Everywhere I looked was the same face plastered on everyone's features.
The only person that I could count on was Seth. He was there when I started throwing things everywhere saying this was my entire fault. He stayed when I told him to leave; he stayed when I didn't talk to anyone. He was there when I cried myself to sleep and most of all; he was there when I left La Push.
Dad couldn't cope, I hated the sympathies, and mum was gone – never coming back.
So we left.
I guess you can say I was a potato. I was strong and solid, but after mum died, I was weak and fragile.
Dad moved us to sunny California. He threw himself at work, never mentioning my mum over the dinner table and I was lucky if I saw him once a day. Most of the time, I was home alone.
I got moved to a new school and made a couple of friends. At first, it was hard but I got over it. People kept asking questions as to why I moved, but I always answered them with "Dad moved his work." I never mentioned mum's death.
Seth and I stayed in touch for years. He helped me through those hard times over the computer screen. It wasn't until I adapted to my new home that we wrote to each other less and less.
It wasn't until Seth's dad passed away that Seth completely stopped talking to me. I was lucky if I got one sentence from him! I hope he was doing okay. Losing a parent was not easy.
After 7 years of not mentioning La Push or mum, you could tell how surprised I was when dad mentioned it over the dinner table one night.
"Mandyline, we need to talk," He said sternly.
I put my fork down and immediately racked through my brain for reckless things I did in the last week that he didn't approve of. I came up with nothing. I was an all round goody-two-shoes.
"Whatever I'm in trouble for, I didn't do it," I said, putting my arms up in surrender.
Dad chuckled. Phew!
"No it's not that," Dad said as he got up to wash the dishes.
"What is it dad?" I asked as he turned his back to me. "I'm 17, I can handle it..." I added half jokingly.
Dad sighed and turned to face me. Dad was still wearing his business suit – tie and all, his hazel eyes glancing at me. I have the same eyes as dad, but I look more like my mum.
"Mandyline..." He started.
"Dad seriously," I said. He was obviously stalling. "You know how much I hate it when people say 'we need to talk.' So, spit it out!"
I was met by silence. And then...
"We're moving back to La Push," Dad finally said.
Sometimes, change is a good thing.
...And that was the first bit of the story. Hope I didn't disappoint anyone.
Review and tell me what you think. Good, bad... between?