Cao Pi sees a bunch of grapes lying on the ground and points at it.
"Die, grapes!"
"Nooooooooooooooo"
*SPLAT* Cao Pi steps on it.
*static transition*
Sun Quan looks around on his table. "Zhou Tai, where's my sandwich?"
"I am your sandwich." Zhou Tai forces his body into Sun Quan's mouth. (That sounded dirty...)
*static transition*
Zhuge Liang stares at a cactus and explains to Jiang Wei. "Now Jiang Wei, do not touch that cactus." Jiang Wei gets magnetically stuck to the cactus. Zhuge Liang gets angry, "YOU'RE DEAD TO ME."
*static transition*
Cao Cao is next to an unconscious Cao Pi. "Help! Is anyone a doctor?" Sima Yi runs up to them, "I'm a doctor!" Cao Cao points at him saying,"Well you're a nerd!" Cao Cao hi-fives the dead Cao Pi.
*static transition*
Sima Yi runs up to Guo Huai. "You've got to help me! My hat is evil and its going to kill me!" Guo Huai walks away slowly. Sima Yi looks up at his hat, "Please don't hurt me..." The hat mwahahahahahas.
*static transition*
Sima Zhao stares at a button that says "pointless button" and presses it. It does nothing. "Hmph."
*static transition*
Zhang Liao walks up to Xu Huang and Xu Huang punches him. "Ah! What the hell's wrong with you?"
LEVEL UP
*static transition*
Li Dian was standing next to Zhang He. "Hey, do you know who's gay? You-" Zhang He had a claw protruding out of Li Dian. "Oh, come on!"
*static transition*
Deng Ai goes up to Sima Shi. "I made you a meatbun!"
"Oh boy! What flavor?" Deng Ai says it dramatically, "Meatbun flavored." Another smaller meatbun pops out of that meatbun slowly.
*static transition*
Bao Sanniang says out, I like singing!" Guan Suo says out,"I like cats singing!" Guan Xing says, "I like trains." Then a train hits him.
*static transition*
Cao Pi points at grapes again. "Die grapes!" The bunch of grapes takes out a gun. "Not today." Cao Pi is shocked.
*static transition*
Jia Xiu laughs, "Haha, they said I could never teach a llama to drive!"
Meeeeeehhhh! The llama drives to the edge of a cliff.
"No, llama, no!" The llama drives off the cliff.
*static transition*
Zhou Yu yells out to Sun Ce wearing a doctor's outfit. "Doctor! I think I may be a homosexual!"
"How can you tell?"
RAIIINNNBBBOOOWSSS! Zhou Yu barfs rainbows in Sun Ce's face.
*static transition*
Han Dang yells out, "Tiger cub fight!" Sun Jian yells out,"No! I'm allergic to adorableness!" The tiger cub hits his face. He takes it into his hands. It had a cutesy face on. "Aww..."
Tombstone that says RIP
*static transition*
Guan Yu talks to Guan Xing. "What are you up to, son?"
"I like trains."
"Hahah...Yes, you do..."
*static transition*
Xiahou Dun is standing next to Zhang He, "Hey, do you know who's gay? You-" The train runs both of them down.
*static transition*
Sima Zhao says while about to eat a meatbun. "I can't wait to eat this meatbun!" Sima Shi says with a monotone voice, "Yes, you can."
"Yeah, I guess you're right..."
*static transition*
Sima Shi stares at a squashed meatbun under a carriage wheel. "Who parked their carriage...on my meatbun?" Zhuge Dan says out, "I did."
"GWAHYUUHHGJAH!" Sima Shi gets so mad he blows up that takes along Zhuge Dan and the carriage. *BOOM*
*static transition*
Ling Tong says out, "Hey, look at my new dog." Gan Ning looks and say, "Oh, that's pretty co-" He sees nothing. "Awww, there's no dog!" Ling Tong bellow out to him and Gan Ning bellows out back to him. Then they both are bellowing at each other.
*static transition*
Li Dian was about to enjoy a salad until Xiahou Dun pushes him and punches the salad.
DING
BANG
DING
"Ah! What's wrong with you? Stop man! Cut it out! I don't want this!"
*static transition*
Xu Shu holds up a gun to his head. "Goodbye world..."
"Ok Xu Shu, I'll see ya around-" *BAM* "Oh! No! That's not what I meant at all!"
*static transition*
Sun Ce points at Taishi Ci and gasps. "There's something on your face!" Ce punches him. "It was pain!"
*static transition*
Back to Xiahou Dun punching the salad. With Li Dian whining about it. "Oh! What's happening? Why are you doing this? I can't even-"
"I AM PUNCHING YOUR SALAD!"
"NOOOOOOOO!"
*static transition*
"Honey, why is the baby on fire?" Sima Yi looks at a baby Sima Shi in flames. Zhang Chunhua flails around."Buy me more jewelry!" (Oh my god, that is just...eh...I can't even...That is the most silliest thing I made her ever do! Well...good luck getting that out of your head...)
*static transition*
Li Dian was punching Xiahou Dun as he was punching the salad.
*static transition*
Lu Xun holds up a gun. "Hey guys, check out my new camera!" He shoots Lu Meng. "Oh wait, this isn't the camera."
*static transition*
"Die grapes!"
"Noooooooo!" Cao Pi was about to step on the grapes until Guan Xing says, "I like trains."
"No, no,no! Wait!" The train runs over Cao Pi.
*static transition*
Gan Ning was skating across an open area. Lu Meng yells at him, "Hey kid! You can't skate here!"
"You can't tell me what to do!" Gan Ning blows up because he was skating over a land mine.
*static transition*
Cao Cao shouts to Guo Jia. "Hey, play me that one where you fall down the stairs!"
"Sure thing!" Guo Jia falls down stairs and onto a piano. Cao Cao yells out, "I love it!"
*static transition*
Yue jin comes out of another him in front of Zhang Liao. "Oh."
*static transition*
Sima Zhao looks at a meatbun. "I want to be a meatbun!" The next scene is a meatbun sitting on a table. Zhang Chunhua cries out, "Zhao, no!"
*static transition*
Cao Pi tells Sima Yi, "Nice hat."
"Thanks."
"I was being sarcastic."
"Well, I stole your face." Cao Pi places his hand on his now-no-face head.
*static transition*
Yue Ying's voice is heard, "Honey, do you like my new shoes?" Zhuge Liang was reading the newspaper."You are a chair, darling."
"I could dream, Zhuge Liang!"
*static transition*
Xiahou Ba comes out of a machine. "It worked! My time machine work-" He gets stepped on by a dinosaur that had Wen Yang's voice. "I am a stegosaurus!"
*static transition*
Pang De points a gun at Guo Jia. "You gettin' mugged, kid!"
"No, you're getting mugged." Pang De drops his gun and raises his hands. "Ah! How the hell does that even work?!"
*static transition*
Guan Yinping says, "When I grow up, I want to go to the moon!"
"Why wait?" Guan Ping kicks her high up into the stars.
*static transition*
Diao Chan and Lu Bu were laying on the grass, looking up at the moon. "It's so beautiful out here."
"Yeah, it's just me, you, and the moon." The moon says out in Chen Gong's voice, "Hey! You two should kiss!"
*static transition*
"I wonder if my pony can fly?" The pony in front of Ma Chao floats up away from him. "Huh."
"static transition*
Zhang Bao goes up to Guan Xing. "I'm going to punch you in the face!"
"But it's opposite day."
"Nooooo-" Zhang Bao's own fist hits him in the face.
*static transition*
Zhuge Liang was standing in front of the Shu kids."Welcome to standing up school." Liu Shan fall flat on his face. "Annnnd you fail."
*static*
Knock! Knock! Sima Zhao answers,"Who's there?" The door slams him onto the wall. THE DOOR!
*static*
Xiahou Yuan says to Guo Huai. "Hey, did you know carrots are good for your eyesight?" Guo Huai takes carrots and jams them into his eyes. "You lied to me."
*static*
Jia Chong slides in front of Sima Shi, Sima Zhao, Wang Yuanji, and Zhuge Dan. He then dances in the air before yelling out, "EVERYONE DO THE FLOP!" Everyone falls flat on their face. (This is going to scar me...)
*static*
Hi meatbun!
I used to be a pig.
...Oh...
*static*
Ma Chao's pony was flying through the air. Cao Ren sees it and tells Dian Wei next to him,"Shoot it down." Dian Wei gets a rocket launcher and shoots the pony.
*static*
Zhang Fei says to little Xing Cai, "What are you doing, honey?"
"I'm drawing a bear!" The drawing was on Xu Chu, and he goes down to swallow her whole in front of Zhang Fei. (Cannibalism!)
*static*
Li Dian runs up to Yue Jin. "Quick! Don't think about cats!" Yue Jin then pukes cats onto his face.
*static*
Sun Shang Xiang yells out, "Hey, do you want to play catch the knife?" Lian Shi says, "Sure!" She gets shot in the head. "Man, I suck at this game." SSX was staring at her hand that was holding a gun.
*static*
Deng Ai has a little Sima Zhao and is talking to Zhang Chunhua. "Ma'am, I caught your son doing..." He gets dramatic. "HOMEWORK."
"Where did I go wrong?!"
*static*
Guo Jia slides over to Cai Wenji's direction. "Hey. Are you an angel? Because I'm allergic to feathers." He pukes in her face.
*static*
Wen Yang gets into Sima Zhao's face and say in a dramatic voice. "I am a very tall midget."
*static*
Ma dai tells Xu Shu, "Hey, turn that frown upside-down!"
"Okay." Xu Shu snaps his own neck and falls. (I'm so sorry...)
*static*
"Hey, nice hat."Zhang He takes Sima Yi's hat and puts it on. The hat comes down onto him with a squish.
*static*
Ma Chao was hanging over the cliff. "Save me, Zhao Yun!"
"No." Ma Chao falls off. "Yoou'rrree aaaa diiiiickkk!"
*static*
Sima Shi was making fruit talk. "Hey, hey. Hey, apple!" Sima Yi and Zhang Chunhua were watching him. "Well, we've failed." Sima Yi takes out a shotgun and aims. "Don't look, honey."
All of this was asdf. Go onto Youtube and type that to check out all the videos this guy has on that. I do not own this. I did make a few changes to the script to fit with the character.