A/N: This is a sequel to Things Run Deep. As this series is a canon divergence supernatural AU, I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you read Thing Run Deep first. If anything, to understand why Flynn is so twitchy.

For the first time, that empty feeling had left him. A piece of him that had been torn out felt full again, bubbling with energy. Everything that he had asked for... he took a deep breath, looking around. He had to thank her. That silver haired angel, the one that had given everything back to him after his wife had died...

But she was nowhere to be found. Oh, of course. She was usually down by the river, hair shining in the moonlight as if she had just taken a bath. That's where she would be again. Silly. How could he had forgotten? He nearly ran down to the river, his steps lighter than they had ever been. Life could finally move on, all thanks to her.

Down by the water, she was still not to be seen. That was fine; he could wait for her. She was probably out looking for food, scavenging or hunting beasts. She had lived out here for so long that she could do it herself. Maybe, though... he would relieve her of that chore. Sweep the tiny woman into his arms, brush that sodden hair back from her face, and litter her cheeks and lips with passionate kisses, bearing her down to the ground as he promised her a life of ease... he groaned as the thought raced through him, reaching down to adjust himself. Yes, he could give her the life she always deserved.

A splash drew his attention, and he turned back to the river. It was probably nothing, fish, but at this time of night he didn't put anything to chance. Bandits were still a possibility, as were nocturnal monsters. His hand rested on the sling by his side as he approached the river, scanning for any threats. If anything would hurt his precious-!

Another splash caught his eyes downward, and he startled. There she was, looking up at him! Her blue eyes were wide as she reached up for him, silver hair floating around her. Something screamed at him, telling him that there was no way for her to be that deep, that the river was too shallow for this. But it was flung aside as he dove in to rescue her, too late hearing her musical giggle in her ears as water rushed in to cradle and bind him.

When booted feet hit the ground by the river, the body had been floating there for at least four hours. Dark eyes narrowed, taking in the scene. Another one. Damn her. Lips drew back off teeth in a snarl. It was too late to find her now. She had gone to her hiding spot, and no one could follow her there. No, it was now time to wait. Wait for her to reveal herself again.

And this time, she would not get away.

That had been a disaster.

Not much more could be said about his day other than total disaster. While it was tempting to ignore everything that was needed to be done as he entered his room, Flynn carefully shut the door behind him and went to where his sword hung, pulling it free and starting to clean and oil it. The sheer routine of taking care of his equipment be started to calm his emotions until he was able to put it back in the sheath and pour a glass of wine without wanting to shatter the glass first.

It never occurred to him he would miss Sodia as much as he would until he had to deal with her replacements. Plural, as no one he promoted was ever as competent as she had been. Not only that, but half of them had heard about his twitchiness after the assassination attempts and had quit after nearly being skewered (Flynn still maintained it was their fault for startling him when he was focused on something else or caught in a nightmare about lips that drained his life and sharp teeth that made him wonder where the line of nightmare lay) while the other half were still under suspicion of being under that woman's unnatural control. While Sodia had been puppeted, it had been apparently by something called a Spinneret that used strings, and her mind had been her own during that time, and she was still trustworthy-

And still had killed Yuri while under her own mind. he reminded himself. It was enough to lose trust to have her by his side. Which put him in this dilemma of rotating second-in-commands that he couldn't depend on, had to fire or quit on him, and lost paperwork constantly such as the supplies for armor today. Flynn groaned before taking a large gulp of wine, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling.

After work should have been stress relief. Lady Estellise had mentioned a very nice man she had met, almost apologetic after the disaster that had been the week with Lady Nadia (and Flynn quickly skirted his mind away from how that attempt had ended). He was intelligent, funny, and perhaps the most important, alive. He didn't ask where the scars on Flynn's neck came from, and had in fact made him smile quite often during dinner. Given time, he could have seen the two of them becoming friends.

How wrong he had been.

And now his glass was empty. Flynn reached out for the wine bottle again, and froze as he heard the door to his room open without a single knock. His other hand slowly drifted to the knife he always kept at his side as he turned his head to look at the intruder.

"I thought you would be back later than this." Judith lounged in the threshold, her arms crossed under her ample bosom to almost emphasize them. Flynn could feel a blush creeping across his cheeks as he realized it was not an accident that she stood that way. "I take it your date didn't go so well tonight," she commented as she closed the door behind her.

Six months ago, he would have told her it was none of her business. Six months ago, he hadn't nearly been assassinated several times, revealed a plot to kill His Highness Ioder and put a mind controlled Estellise on the throne, and realized he was attracted to his dead best friend. Even Lady Estellise wasn't enough, as talking to her seemed counter to helping. She seemed to want to soothe him more than anything, and while it helped during acute attacks... Judith seemed to know what to say, in her blunt way, to make him think. And eventually, after three months... "No," he told her, entrusting her with the truth. "It didn't."

With carefree motions, she plucked the bottle from his hands and proceeded to rummage for another glass. This had happened enough that he had gone and bought another, not caring to watch her take swings directly from the bottle. Satisfied, she poured two glasses and nearly did the same to the chair across from him, her limbs moving gracefully before her long fingers wrapped themselves around the stem and she took a long sip of wine. "Well, don't just leave it there. Tell Mama Judy all about it."

Flynn resisted the urge to drop his head against the table. He did not wish to think about this. Which probably meant he needed to, and not let it fester and bother him more. "He was... nice."

"And..." she prompted.

"And funny."

"Don't make me have to take more extreme measures."

Flynn sighed. Extreme measures usually involved some form of tickling, as she found he was quite sensitive. "It might be because I don't wish to talk about it. It's the usual problem."

Judith rolled her eyes. "Of course." She took a large gulp of wine, then looked at him critically. "The usual problem" was something she was quite aware of, and something that had taken her by surprise at first. She hadn't known he had been a virgin, completely uninterested in the people around him. And she hadn't known that he had started to feel particularly close to Yuri, to the point his death nearly shattered him. So when he mentioned that none of the dates he went on to distract him from what had happened, he felt no sexual attraction to, she hadn't quite understood. Flynn still hadn't told her that he had lost the virgin status as the implications to how still made him nearly lose all contents of his stomach even if he had still thought Yuri was alive at the time, so she merely thought he had no interest in sex at all. "One would think they would wait until they got to know you and got to know if fucking you was a deal breaker or if they actually cared for you before asking that question."

Unfortunately for Flynn, he had been taking a sip of wine when the bluntness made him splutter. He didn't quite get it all over Judith, but the table certainly got a layer of Chardonnay. "Judith!" he exclaimed, his ears burning enough to be scarlet.

Her face remained a stony unamused look, but the twinkle in her eyes belied the amusement at his reaction as she passed him a washcloth. "Why do you keep going on these dates? Men, women... every time I'm in town you're drinking and have a new story to tell about some idiot thinking they can get in the Commandant's pants."

Flynn stopped mopping up the wine for a moment, his eyes focused on a small flaw in the wood. Why did he keep going on these dates? They never did end well, she was right. Even the best ones ended with his lover asking when they would finally sleep together. One he had even forced himself to do so, thinking it was something he just had to do, and ended the relationship the next day as the feeling of guilt for taking it to that level when he simply didn't feel that deeply for her had kept him awake all night. But the one that did make him want, the one that sparked between them and drew him closer just by being in the same room... He shook his head, trying to forget. He couldn't remember that, couldn't let himself want that. "I don't know."

A lie, but she didn't need to know why his hand half rose to his neck, why he still woke with an erection that didn't go away until he cupped his scars as he brought himself to climax. Judith sat back, studying his face. She knew he was lying, but since she didn't know the whole truth, she couldn't have guessed it was about Yuri. "You can't distract yourself forever from what happened," she said finally. "It's great you're reaching back out to people instead of shutting yourself away. You were closing yourself off for a while there and you were getting more and more paranoid as time went on. But this isn't healthy either, cycling through people like this."

At this point, Flynn did let his head hit the table. "Then what do you suggest, Judith?" he asked, his voice muffled by the wood.

"A vacation. Get away from Zaphias, from where this all happened, and relax a bit. See some sights, eat some food you never usually eat, get drunk on some truly rotgut alcohol... if you want, you can take Ba'ul so you don't have to deal with other people as you go from town to town," came her prompt reply.

He eyed her skeptically. A vacation... while it wasn't exactly a bad idea, it did have flaws. Who would take care of the army while he was gone? There were some breathtakingly incompetent people as well as compromised soldiers that were still breaking the control, some of which had to retire as they couldn't handle it. Not to mention- "And where would you be while I'm on vacation with Ba'ul?"

Judith tilted her head innocently, which instantly meant he would not like the next words out her mouth. "Why, next to you. Someone needs to be able to haul you up to your room and hold your hair back as you vomit up that rotgut ale."

"And your duties to Brave Vesperia?" It wasn't that he wouldn't mind taking a vacation with Judith. A bit to the contrary; when she wasn't needling him she was fun to be around. And he did feel he didn't see her enough. Something about her... he never knew the depths of her intelligence, her compassion, or her sense of humor. It reminded him of- of Yuri, in a way. But not in many ways, that she was her own person. At the same time, he didn't want her to shirk her duties.

She waved her hand. "I've been working non-stop for the last six months. Karol agrees that it's in my best interest to take some time off and relax for more than a few hours talking to you."

"He agrees?" Flynn echoed dubiously. Judith laughed, leaning back and draining her glass.

"Well, more that he has become a nagging mother and is threatening to put me on forced vacation if I don't take it myself. While I see it as a waste of time, I think it would be less so if it meant you came back with a smile on your face."

Even though he knew she meant it without any sexual intent, he couldn't help but flush. "It doesn't sound like much of a vacation if you're spending it looking after me," he finally managed, pouring her another glass.

"Oh Flynn." She shook her head. "You really haven't taken any time off recently, have you."