The flower of despair

CHAPTER 1.1

The living room of the mansion was empty. The dust came out and came in with the breeze that the waves could only make. The dampness was suffusing on the cliff's rocks that lift the building. Behind that natural wall a sci-fi looking workshop was. A wide variety of tools, holographic panels and futuristic gadgets were lying on the floor in total chaos. Everything because of Tony's laziness. He was sited on a chair and had an "iron" gauntlet in his hand. He seemed have noticed something peculiar. His eyes were focusing on something very tiny and specific. They moved with sharpness and made a quick searching conclusion. —Yes, some bullet fragments got stuck in this tiny space. There was no doubt this was a very little concern for him, and not just metaphorically. Anyone that could see the suit behind Tony would have gotten surprised. It was burned, dented and full of bullet holes. The machines would have done the reparation job, but Tony preferred to mend the small details by himself. It happened in the New York invasion. When he killed a flying beast breaking through its body a mechanism near the hips didn't work correctly and Tony couldn't compensate the impact force, and everything because of a couple of metal pieces at the wrong place at the wrong time. After that, the reparation machines were improved and seemed to be totally functional and safe. They could search microns in the suit; but in a battle against a Hydra's base a missile wasn't launched because the system confused some little rocks as part of the suit and thought Tony was going to shoot himself. In the end, Tony got tired of these incidents and decided to repair the smallest details with Jarvis help and holograms, but sometimes he used plain sight for working. He could have supervised the machines repairing the suit, and actually wanted so; but that would have taken over 6 hours and he didn't have that time. He preferred spending time with Pepper, develop new technologies, participate in charity campaigns, practice martial arts and sometimes he had to attend S.H.I.E.L.D meetings.

He loved to hear music while working, but that day he woke up wanting to hear nothing more than silence. His immense concentration made him frown. He used the tools like a surgeon and focused like a hawk. When he retired the fragments, he noticed someone going downstairs with the corner of his right eye. He expected to be Pepper and so it was. What contradicted his thoughts was the reason of the visit. Tony already imagined himself talking about trivial stuff, but also imagined forgetting those with the grace of courting. —Hello Tony, Fury wants you to report with him. He says they found out something important and that you need to go now. —Tony slide his hands over his face and looked Pepper. She felt intimidated at the instant. The shadow under Tony's eyes were worse than the darkest cave in the woods. He stands up and picked up his jacket. He walked to the mirror door that lead to the living room. —It always is "important" with him. —Without kissing or hugging Pepper, he opened the workshop's door and went upstairs to the superior floor garage. He took an Audi R8 2013 and left the Garage.

Outside the weather was warm and serene, there weren't houses close. The gate separated a beautiful garden with colored flowers and short palms from the gray and worn-out highway. Tony always carried out the gate control along his keys, he pressed its button and drove out his Mansion. He was going at a very high speed, although, he just was thinking about his problems. At a certain point he looked the sea and saw something especial within the pettiness. By the first time he realized such an important thing, but that he had been ignoring all this time. The sea was as big and sorrow as he was. The colorful and orange sun rays were the apparent happiness Tony had, but it only was a disguise. He had Pepper, but lately he didn't feel as connected to her as the first time. Fury with his "emergencies" and she with the enormous business plans. He didn't blame her at all, but he knew S.H.I.E.L.D demanded too much time. He wanted to relax a little bit, so he turned on the blinking lights and stopped in a highway parking slot the he always saw, but never used. He took a "Sierra Nevada" beer from his car's cupholder and drank a little bit. He closed his eyes for a second, breath deeply and started the engine.

After a long time, Tony was close from his private airport, where he was going to take a S.H.I.E.L.D airplane. When he bended towards a parking slot he remembered that day just like 4 years ago. He parked the car and got out. He just stared at his front, like observing the nothing. — "I thought I lose back in there". — He said whispering. Although the plane's sound already could hide his nostalgia. He turned out towards the S.H.I.E.L.D airplane and walked towards its access ramp. Steve already was waiting for Tony. He sustained his shield which was touching the ground. He already wore his combat suit. His face depicted severity, very serious for anyone that could see him at the time. Tony knew it was one of the rare occasions where the issue was serious and urgent. Without saying hello to Steve, he walked along. His friend just kept standing and stared at Tony with worry, but also curiousness. He changed his adamant and strict face for a more strangely confused face. The reason why Steve was annoyed was because Tony arrived 1 hour late, but he realized something was weird. He put back his shield to his back and approached to Tony, who already was sited. —Is something wrong Tony? —There wasn't an immediate answer, but nor it wasn't watchfulness. There would have been silence, but the ramp began to close. Steve looked at the pilots' cabin and sighed. He walked to the other passenger's row, took out the shield at his back, sited and fastened the two seatbelts. He looked at the floor at saw a little bit of dirtiness, but it was enough for reminding him New Jersey. When he was a little man that could not offer anything else than his bravery. —How bad is it? —Steve gazed Tony with confusion. —I saw how you've been behaving since I got here. You remind me Fury right now, and I hate that... —Rogers just remained silent. Giving a concerned look to Tony, just staring, like if he was thinking on something. —I want shi… thing ruined my night with Pepper, at least tell me this is worth it. —Tony knew there wasn't going to happen anything that night, but he wanted to give an excuse for making Steve feel bad. — I can't assure it to you. I am exactly like you, I also…

—You don't have a love waiting for you Steve, I do. Everything Fury asks is like when your mom tells you to clean your brother's ass. We could solve anything with calls. —Steve's heart compressed itself almost to the point of implosion. He got pale and his eyes burned fire. He managed to control himself although he was furious. —Tony, you know that the information cannot be infiltrated by any means. Everything he says is important and you and I know that Hydra can hack the calls easily. —The truth was that Tony hated that Fury moved constantly to other places. Luckily for Tony, Nick always moved around the west, and by so it was better for Tony to remain in California. If S.H.I.E.L.D director's schedule could be more predictable or protocoled to certain places, Pepper and Tony could have begun to live somewhere they could be together without much problems. But certainly, it wasn't like that. —I don't know what happened to you this morning Tony, but I'll tell you something. Don't mess with Peggy. —Tony heard those words carefully, he understood Steve's pain, but something in his inner core was changing, he felt that, but couldn't do anything for it. —Whatever you say cap. I don't really care. —An invisible, heavy and dense mist formed by instant, like the eco spreading within Steve's heart. He gasped silently, agitated. Tony felt something strange. Never in his life crossed the line in such way. It was like if something told him, deeply inside, this was what he truly felt. Almost like a voice, but it wasn't that. The unknown origin of the phenomena just shamed Tony. The silence was awkward and thinking that Tony was mad enough for sowing the despair seeds was just made Tony to turn his look back to the window at his right. The embarrassment was too much for looking at Steve, and let's not say that stare at his eyes, but only by peeking him. The oceanic landscape was covered by the orange sun-rays, it looked intense, but for Tony it was gray and sorrow. This just made him have a nap, and so he did with anger and shame. He closed his eyes and slept profoundly.