Why am I stuck rasing kids?

A/N: hey pimps judethehedgehog here with a brand new life god dammmit! Enjoy! I don't own hetalia unfortunely.

"Sammy calm down!", I said trying to reassure my close friend, "I don't know how a russian kid ended up on front door. No! This is not a prank!" Damn eric! And his stupid pranks!

I just sighed out of my friend's hysteria and went back to comfrot mode. "Look sammy just ask his name and take care him for a while ok?" I suggested. My ears perched up as hearded the doorbell rang. "Hold on a second Sam," I said as I turned away from the phone.

"KYLE!" I yelled, "get the fuckin door!"

"Why sould I?" My roommate yelled back, "Get it yourself!"

"Get the freaking door before I get my katana and chop your freaking balls off! I retorted. I heard running and scrambling towards the door. I quickly smiled in self satisfaction over my threat. NEVER. Underestimate me when it comes to my threats because I can and will go thourgh with them. Finally in high school my idotic roommates learn their lesson. My attention went back to the phone.

"Sorry about that. Anyways what will you do about the kid ok wish you luck! Bye!" I said as I hung up.

"FERNANDO!" I heard kyle yell, "there's a huge ass package for you. Help me carry it got dammit!"

"Hold on a second!" My light spanish and russian voice rang. "I'm coming!"

I walked to the front of ours, mostly my, house. My eyes widen when I saw the packege. It was a crate the size of freaking 9 seats at the movies! I don't remember ordering.. wait a sec. Shit! I flashed a glare towards my blond ahem "friend."

"Is this a crate full of sex toys you and eric happen to stash in my room before my dear family arrived?" I inquired with some child like innocennes

"Nope," he grumbled, "but I wish it wish it was."

"Well let's make sure!" I said while I had clamped my hands together. Kyle just raised an eyebrow at my strange behavior.

"What? You know me and how my psyche randomly changes," I huffed while crrossing my arms. Kyle just dismissed it.

"Now let's get just this son of a bitch open," Kyle growled.

Using my handy dandy kunai knives. We got the mother fucker open. As soon as the front of the crate fell off I gasped. Inside was a kid no older than 12 covered in a bunch of brusies. I quickly ran to his aid while my eyes flashed a light pink as my psyche changed once again.

"Oh my god!" I exclaimed,"is he hurt? Oh what am I gonna do. Where are yes parents?"

"Fernando," my roommate annoyingly replied as I fell into a deeper hysteria.

"Fernando," he repiled with a growl

Soon he reach his breaking point. "FERNANDO CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" Kyle exclaimed.

I muttered one of my famous voodoo curses on him. Then started to shake the kid with soft shake. "Hey kid?" I asked.

I jumped when his eyes rapidly opened to soft brown. "Hello," he replied with a soft aisan voice, "It's nice to see you again father."

Me and kyle exchange confusing looks at each other because i'm still a vi- ahhh never mind! I glanced quickly at him. Thick hair, brown eyes, brown hair, light tan, hedgehog ears and tail... HOLY SHIT HE REALLY COULD BE MY SON!

"Listen.. uh" I said.

"Kiku," he replied.

"Listen kiku though you may look ALOT like me I am not your father. If I was why would I forget about my own son?" I inquried.

"But father I," Kiku manage to say.

"How bout' I take care of you till I find you're real parents?" I asked.

"YAAAHHH!," Kiku exclaimed while jumping up and down,"I get to stay!"

Wow this kid really could be my son.

A/N soooo major OOC ness here. Once again kyle, eric and sammy are actually my friends in real life. So explain a bit I change my back story a bit in this. I rescently stop performing in Cirque du soleil for awhile after being in 3 shows for 10 years. So I'm about 27 and very muscular in this AU. And came back to San Antonio to attend collage. Then the crate randomily showed up. (The phone call is in sammy's side of the story on her account) and the random outbrust is gonna be explained right now. The allied and axis powers are units, very human like androids who can feel pain, have full on emotions, phsycaly grow but not mentaly but they can do this at free will. Hope this explained everything bye!