Written for Beael's "The Story of a Broken Nose" Challenge. I had Remus and James and the prompts used were obnoxious and doorway. This is sort-of-kind-of-not-really-but-really related to Holiday Ball. Same universe, one could say, but you technically don't have to read it to get this. Fourth Year Tonks and Seventh Year Marauders. Fun for all ;)
Lily sat in front of the fire, scribbling doodles in a notebook, when she was startled by the slamming of the Fat Lady's portrait-doorway and the sound of someone's fist connected with another's nose and the crunching of bone that followed. She snapped her head around in time to see Remus retract his bloody fist from James' face.
"What the hell is going on?" she shouted, jumping up and scurrying across the room.
"I called his girlfriend obnoxious," James said, holding his nose and trying very poorly to catch the blood pouring out.
"You called her a whore," Remus shouted, and for a split moment Lily was glad it was too late for the younger students to be up. She then gaped at James once she had processed what Remus said.
"You . . . What? Why would you say that?" she asked, incredulous. James stood pinching his nose and taking glances every few seconds at his seething friend.
"It's not my fault that she told you so loudly in front of me that she thinks she's pregnant," James said, becoming suddenly fascinated by the ceiling.
Lily stood silent for a moment and James put on his best "ha-ha I've won" face.
"I'm going to talk to her," Remus said, drained of all his color. He turned on his heel and stormed out of the Common Room.
"Congratulations, Moony!" James shouted gleefully over his shoulder. He looked back to see Lily glaring at him. "What?" he asked hesitantly.
"You're forgetting what happened to Tonks, you ignorant prick," she said, her temper as boiling as Remus' had been. "You'd better go up to bed before I punch you, too." James didn't believe Lily would actually punch him, but he retreated up the stairs to his dormitory, anyway. One broken nose was enough for one night, he thought.