CHAPTER 1 – SHIP WARS ARE JUST NO GOOD, SIR
A/N: First off, this fic is not meant to start ship wars. It was a fun little idea that popped into my head and I decided to entertain it. Lots of humour and fourth walls shattered, this is a sort of crack fic I guess? Just in case you don't already know (spoiler alert!), this is a SWAN QUEEN story.
Also, please forgive me for any mistakes. They're all mine.
Thanks for reading and I hope you'll enjoy!
The lecture theatre was buzzing with the usual cacophony of inane conversation and Regina Mills sat perked and alert, waiting impatiently for the lecturer to step in. It was her second year in college majoring in creative writing and this first semester's classes were quite… unusual, to say the least. Not that she was complaining.
The brunette had been working hard towards her goal ever since she graduated high school, choosing her major and extracurricular activities carefully. She had planned her next steps with precision to ensure that she could secure a place in law school and quite frankly, she had been overjoyed that debating was one of her classes this semester, despite what her peers may think.
Just then, the doors to the lecture theatre swished open and a silent hush fell upon the students as they watched their lecturer – a sturdy young man with dark brown hair and pleasant features – made his way to the front.
"Good morning everyone."
The booming deep voice reverberated around the walls of the theatre and Regina felt adrenaline kicking in. Finally she was able to learn something directly related to being a lawyer, and she was not even in law school yet!
"You can call me Mr. Henry, and please just call me that," the lecturer said, writing his name in big bold letters on the front board.
"Now, can anyone tell me why you think you are taking debating class?"
"Because we're wasting our time?" Someone from the back shouted, causing a few giggles.
Regina scoffed. Imbeciles.
"Good answer," Mr. Henry smiled and he seemed unfazed. "But that's not exactly why. You see, you as creative writing students may have the same question: why the hell are we taking classes that requires speaking when our pens do the speaking for us?"
Regina heaved an internal sigh and leaned back in her chair. There this lecturer goes, pulling the oldest trick in the book: introductory monologue deemed to be inspirational that may or may not employ the Socratic Method. This was nothing new to her.
Mr. Henry carried on, "In creative writing, you have to think what kind of story you want to tell, the characters you want to show, how their relationships with each other can benefit the storyline. You want to be able let the reader listen and relate to these characters and their dialogues. And what better way to train your thinking but to debate?
"You see, debating is about thinking quick on your feet: the opponent fires something, and you fire something twice as substantial back. It's about knowing your facts and arguing for it."
The students watched as their lecturer turned on the projection screen and some groaned as the assignment criteria flashed on the screen.
"Your first continual assessment will constitute thirty percent of your final grade," Mr. Henry stated. "And it will be due in two weeks' time."
"WHAT?!"
"Hey, that's not fair!"
"But we haven't even learnt anything about debating yet!"
The initial murmur that broke out across the theatre turned into indignant shouts and it took a while before peace was restored.
"I understand where all of you are coming from," Mr. Henry nodded. "But to learn about speaking, you must learn to speak first."
He made his way to his bag and took our some papers. "Don't worry class, I won't be too harsh. And besides, I have edited the assignment to make it more – should I say – relatable to you."
Mr. Henry flashed a paper on the screen and Regina felt herself frowning as she read its content. What is this?
"On the screen, you will see several phrases that you won't understand," Mr. Henry smiled and Regina figured he was probably enjoying himself. "These phrases are actually pairings of several fictional characters that you will know from famous fairy tales. Now, the entire class will be divided according to these eight pairings and debate their way to prove why their respective pairing should be the top pairing."
"So basically, it's like a ship war?" A girl piped up.
Mr. Henry looked at her quizzically, "Excuse me?"
"Like fandom ship wars?" The girl continued, "I'm from a fandom and sometimes our pairing that we want so badly to be together is deemed together with someone else and that becomes another fandom. So then a lot of bad tension happens online and my point is, ship wars are just no good sir."
"No of course not," Mr. Henry laughed. "Wars are no good, in general, and I am sure a 'ship war' that you are describing is not beneficial as well. What I'm proposing is just a friendly little contest between these pairings, or 'ships' if you are more familiar with the term. The grounds of comparison are not based on which character is the most popular or whatever, it is how compatible you think they are based on their relationship history. This is where the creative writing part comes in."
Regina watched as Mr. Henry replaced the paper on screen with another one and started reading from it.
"Red Beauty – Red Riding Hood and Belle
Facts:
Red Riding Hood and Belle started off as friends. They met in a tavern that Red frequents and when Belle was finally free from her confinement in the Beast's castle.
They started to confide in each other and realise that they both have similarities. But one thing connects them together: a beast.
Red had a terrible secret: she was a werewolf-"
"Wait a minute, Professor!" A shout came from somewhere in the middle of the lecture theatre and everyone turned to look at the lanky brunette who had chosen to stand with crossed arms. "I don't remember that story happening in any version of Red Riding Hood's fairytale and believe me, I am an avid fan."
Mr. Henry laughs. "Oh of course! I borrowed these characters and rewrote them according to my version. Call it fanfiction if you will, Miss…?"
"Lucas," the brunette replied with a huff and Regina could see red streaks on her hair as she flipped it. "Ruby Lucas. And what sort of fanfiction is this, sir, if you don't mind me asking?"
"Ms. Ruby Lucas," Mr. Henry acknowledged. "Just a little story I write in my free time that I decided to incorporate into your assignment. I thought it could be fun for you creative writing students and how you can relate."
"What's the title of this story you're writing?" Somebody called from the back as Ruby took her seat.
"Once Upon A Time," Mr. Henry smiled mysteriously. "But I digress! Now that you get an idea how it looks like, it's time to split this class. To be honest, it's quite a small class for such a big lecture theatre… Anyway, how about a numbering sequence?"
[-]
Regina groaned internally as she made her way to all the assigned '3's and watched as the groups around her started to form. There were approximately forty-eight students in this class and she scanned the other five students she was going to spend time with for this assignment.
Clearly she was going to be the leader.
"Hi," the blonde girl sitting beside her gave a small smile. "My name is Kathryn Nolan."
"Regina Mills," she answered, giving a clipped reply.
"You're from the other class right?"
"Yes."
"Nice to meet you!"
Regina turned to look back at Kathryn and despite noticing the sincerity, she gave nothing but a noncommittal hum.
From the front, Mr. Henry waved the papers. "Alright! Now that you have formed your groups, can one representative from each group come down and get your pairing? This person will also be the leader of the group."
Without prompt, Regina stood up and watching as none of her other group members seemed to have any objection, she made her way down to the front.
"What number is your group, miss?" Mr. Henry asked when Regina approached him.
"Three."
"Alright, here you go. Best of luck!"
Receiving the paper and making her way back to her seat, a commotion came up with someone yelling, "Mr. Henry! Are all these pairings romantic?"
"Not all," he replied. "Some may be platonic as well. It depends on how you perceive it. You can argue for it to be platonic, romantic, etc. as long as you have strong evidence to back your argument."
"But sir," the same voice cried with frustration. "It says right here in the facts that Mulan developed feelings for Princess Aurora! How is that even possible? They're both women!"
The entire lecture theatre immediately quieted as they waited for the reply of their professor, who only stood in front looking amused.
"So?"
The girl who had spoken looked taken aback with the simple question before she became flustered. "I do not side with the idea of homosexuality."
"Well, Miss…?"
"Ghorm."
"Ms. Ghorm, if you really do feel uncomfortable with that, you can tell me your full name and I can give you a zero for this assignment," Mr. Henry shrugged casually. "I'm pretty open-minded. I wouldn't want you to overstep your boundaries and embrace change now, would I?"
Regina smirked as she watched her classmate turn red faced. The brunette had never liked Blue – the name she was better known as – and it was plain silly to cause a huge fuss over such a small incident.
As the class around her started to regain its hype, she looked down at the pairing she got and mentally prepared herself for Outlaw Queen.