"Hey, Aldo." Booth came into Paradise Lost and sat down heavily at the bar. "How's it going?"
"You look like shit, Booth." Aldo shook his head as he brought out a bottle of Scotch and two glasses.
"Yeah, thanks for the encouragement." Booth rubbed his hands over his face, shaking his head and grimacing at his friend.
"What's the problem this time?" Aldo stood behind the bar, arms crossed over his chest, with a grim look on his face.
"I don't always come to see you just because I have a problem." Booth tried to grin. "Can't I come check on an old Army buddy?"
"Like Hell, Booth. I can tell by looking at you that something's eating at you. You might as well be wearing a neon sign around your neck that says you're upset about some shit. So spill it." He poured Booth a Scotch and one for himself. "Drink up, and tell me all about it."
Booth slumped a bit on his bar stool, looked up at the ceiling and exhaled slowly, before looking at Aldo. "Damn priest." He drained his glass and slammed it down on the counter.
"I ain't a priest anymore, Master Sergeant, but I know you won't get past whatever's keeping you up all night until you get it out in the open. That's why confession is a good thing, you know?" He poured Booth another drink. "And even though I keep trying to avoid it, you still keep coming here to confess. Don't you have a priest at your own church you can confess to?"
"It's not the same, Aldo, and you know it. You've been in a battle situation. Father Scott...he's a good guy, but he doesn't get it...about how I feel." Booth saw that Aldo understood, just like he always did. Priest or not, Aldo would always be his confessor.
"Fine. You talk, I'll listen."
"Okay." Booth fidgeted with his glass, pursing his lips, avoiding eye contact with Aldo. "I shot Pelant through the heart. The son of a bitch is dead, and now Bones and I can get married."
"I see." Hearing the undercurrent of emotion in Booth's voice, Aldo studied the counter a minute before looking at him. "That's a good thing, right? You're gonna get the girl and live happily ever after." He looked to see Booth's reaction.
"Yeah. I'm really happy." Booth smiled faintly. "I have everything I've ever wanted...a beautiful woman who loves me, beautiful children, a nice house, a good job…." HIs voice trailed off as he stared at his glass.
"So what's the problem?", Aldo asked, even though he thought he knew.
"I killed Pelant, and I was glad. I don't remember ever being so happy that a guy was dead in my entire life. He deserved to die, and I guess I didn't give a damn that I shot him. I hope he burns in Hell." Booth rubbed the back of his neck as he thought the situation through. "Aldo, usually when I have to kill someone, I feel contrite, you know? Remorseful... and I can ask God to forgive me for taking a life. This time I felt like I was doing God a favor. I felt no remorse. I don't even want to ask God for forgiveness, and that makes me wonder what kind of man I really am."
"And it also makes you wonder if you deserve to be happy, right?" Aldo spoke quietly, watching for Booth's reaction. "Booth, you did what you had to do."
Booth nodded. "I know rationally and logically I did the right thing. Pelant had killed a lot of people. He'd threatened to kill Bones, Aldo. He tried to keep me from marrying her, and he tried to destroy me, my family, and my friends. I hated him like I've never hated anyone else I can remember, including Heather Taffet. I'm so relieved that he's gone...but in my heart and soul I feel awful. I killed him because I hated him….and that's a mortal sin. I committed a mortal sin….murder...so do I really deserve to be happy?"
Aldo sighed as he studied this tortured soul in front of him, remembering again why dealing with Booth had created the crisis of faith that made him leave the priesthood. "Booth, you have every right to defend your own life, and the lives of your family. You were in a war situation. It was undeclared, maybe, but it was a war. You warned Pelant to stand down, right?"
"Yeah, but I really hoped he wouldn't...I really wanted to kill him." Booth inhaled sharply as the gravity of his words hit him. "I wanted to kill the son of a bitch. I don't know how I would've reacted if he had surrendered."
"C'mon, Booth...we both know he wouldn't have surrendered. He was bent on destroying himself as well as you. One way or the other, he wanted to die, right?"
"Are you saying he used me to commit suicide, Aldo?" Booth paused, thinking over the scenario that had led up to Pelant's death. "He knew I'd try to kill him?"
"Of course he knew that, Booth." Aldo nodded as he poured another shot for Booth. "He knew that if he had Temperance with him, you'd come after her at all costs. You'd never give up until you knew she was safe. He knew you'd try to kill him, and that there were two possible outcomes. Either one would have served his purposes...either you'd die as he destroyed the place, or he'd die and you'd have to deal with killing him."
Booth sipped his Scotch, thinking about what Aldo had said, still confused about what he had felt. "But the hate….the anger...I've never felt it that strongly. That's what made me want to kill him."
Aldo pressed his lips together and shook his head. "I don't think you actually hated Pelant, Booth."
"What? I know what hate feels like, Aldo….."
"That's not what I mean. I think you hated the evil he was doing more than the actual man. The Bible talks about that kind of hate. In Amos Chapter 5 it says 'Hate evil. Love good. And let justice prevail at the gate.' That's what you were doing, Booth. That's why you did what you did in the military and why you do what you do now for the FBI. You love justice and feel the need to try to rid the world of evil. That need is what drives your life. You're a defender of the faith other people have in justice."
Booth ran his fingers around the rim of his glass. He wasn't convinced. "What about that justice part? It was vigilante justice, delivered by me, not a court of law. Who am I to play God?"
Aldo smiled grimly. "Well, maybe you did do God a favor when you took the bastard out. Pelant got the justice coming to him, I think." Aldo drained his glass and grimaced. "Enough worrying about mortal sins now. That bastard's gone. Don't keep him alive with your worry. Don't give him anymore of your life. Go confess to your own priest at your own church about the hate and anger you had for Pelant, if it'll make you feel better. Then get married and live happily ever after like you deserve to do."
Booth pulled out a twenty and laid it on the counter. "Thanks, Aldo. I wish there was some way I could repay you for all the help you've given me over the years."
"Well, tell people about my place here, and that'll be great." Aldo slapped Booth on the back, laughing. "And, hey...don't forget to invite me to the wedding."
"You're at the top of the list, buddy. G'night, Aldo."
"G'night, Booth….sleep well."
"Yeah, I will….I really will."