Title: verities
Prompt: Nov 25 / This is your choice, and you will live with it and its consequences until the day the suns die.
Character/Pairing: Joseph, Kidman
A/N: For my sister.
Summary: She apologizes through the bars. It's too late though.
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His skin was pale, too pale. Kidman watched her prisoner through the bars, watched the shallow rise of his chest with every breath.
He might have lost more blood than she thought. Either that or he hadn't fully recovered from the shock of that...place. She wasn't sure what to call the dreamscape—despite her training, it wasn't what she expected.
"You're here again?" Joseph muttered, opening his eyes. Startled, she stared at him in surprise as he sat up. He winced a little as his hands scraped against the brick floor.
"You were awake?" she replied, the only thing she could think to say. The room was brightly lit, the walls a blinding white, and she wished she had a shadow to hide in.
But there was nowhere to run now.
"Like I can sleep here." Joseph took off his glasses, examining it for any scratches. She couldn't blame him, he had been treated roughly since they captured him. "So, how long?"
"Huh?"
Joseph glared, the angriest she had ever seen him. Even back in the nightmare, when his infected form had tried to kill her, she hadn't seen him look like this. "Were you planning this from the start?"
She didn't answer, just watched him as he carefully dusted himself. So meticulous, even now. He was infamous back in the precinct for how tidy he required his desk to be. It was almost a ritual watching him clean.
"Yes."
His long fingers paused, his hands no longer wiping his sleeves. "That's all you have to say?" She didn't reply and he yelled now, frustrated. "No explanations?"
He still wanted to believe in her. Kidman bit her lip and closed her eyes.
"Nothing!?" Joseph started to cough now, a harsh noise as it echoed off the cell. He had pushed himself too far and she listened to him pant heavily.
"So that's the truth?" The edge left his voice, leaving only defeat. "So that's all."
She would have laughed had it not been so serious. The truth. Just what was the truth?
There were many things she could say.
There many truths that she could give. Her reasons, her change of heart, her feelings, anything that would changed how he viewed her.
In the end, none of them mattered. The result was the same, Joseph was trapped here and there was nothing she could do.
There was nothing she would do.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, too soft for him to hear. It was too late for these words, too late for these feelings.
In another life, maybe this wouldn't have happened. If she were stronger, braver, or even just colder and didn't care at all.
But she lived in this life.
"Goodbye," she said, louder.
In this life, she was a traitor and there was no changing that.