Name: "Job Description"
Author: DevilChild
Email: gwyliane@yahoo.com
Spoilers: "Reprise" and the rest of A-S2, I guess.
Distribution: Just ask, I'll say yes.
Rating: PG for angst.
Improv: #10 flow -- rave -- blue -- fall
Summary: Lindsey in the shower ("Reprise").
Author's Notes: This is an un-bata'd version - suggestions are appreciated!

A twist of the handle sends a flow of water from the showerhead, warm and smelling like cedar from the new hot water tank. Stepping under it I take a deep breath, trying to forget that Darla is outside, probably reading my files by now.

She makes her blue eyes turn softly on me, as if she actually cares. It affects me, makes my chest ache and my head light even though I know she's only playing with me. I try not to look at her too much.

How can she say I'm not dirty? Can't she smell me? Even now, in the shower with water pouring over my skin, I can smell blood. It's not mine.

Is that what she smells like? Like death, like the song of a scythe as it swings its way towards a human throat?

This wasn't in my job description. I can feel my hands on that scythe more and more each day - I'm the one cutting people down like wheat. The shower helps me separate my work from my home - at least it cuts down on the nightmares. As I scrub myself with soap I try frantically to stop the ranting and raving of my tortured conscience.

Maybe it's easy for Darla to fall away from her own past - she doesn't have a soul. She can't feel remorse for the murder of thousands of people. And she doesn't mind.

I can't feel it either. I feel terror, because if there's a Hell then that's where I'm going. If I'm not there already. Wolfram & Hart is little more than a concentration of the world's evil; Holland told me that once. Maybe Hell is just like Earth.

Maybe they'll have the job for me there, the rough wood of a scythe's handle blistering my skin.

Because I'm not a murderer.

I am Death.

These bloodstains are never coming out.

Wow! I actually wrote something that *wasn't* romance! Okay, so it had a little da/li. Big deal. Anyway, r/r and visit my website - Caritas.