"I can tell you something about life
...the End"
You know that feeling when you have acid poured into your veins? I hope you never have to. It felt like pain was everything that I had ever known. Like pain was the answer to every question. I had wanted to die, yes, but I was hoping for instantaneous. Not all encompassing suffering. I've never wanted to die more than I did in those days or years. I don't even know how long it took.
I stood at the edge of the cliff looking over. It is beautiful. The blue sky hanging over the vibrant green trees. They majestic and strong. So full of life. They make the urge to jump stronger.
How can a tree have more life than me? I have consciousness and feelings. I have skin and bones. Blood and sweat. Pain and love.
In this, I find my answer. They don't feel pain or think. They just are. This in itself is beautiful and I long to be like them.
As I look over the cliff, I see the long journey I will take to the rocks below. It taunts me and calls me forward. I step forward boldly. Rocks tumble over the cliff. They taunt me as well.
The snapping of twigs behind me makes me turn around.
There stands a pale man with glowing red eyes. His skin is as pale as snow. The stillness of his body is unnatural. The man doesn't even take a breath. Something in my mind tells me he is death. I want to embrace him.
"You look so longingly at certain death," he speaks softly. If I wasn't as numb as I am I would have marveled over his voice. It was like a melody.
"I'm ready to die." My voice is lifeless. The man tilts his head at me. His long, black hair sways behind him.
"Why?" Flashes of my life pop into my mind. Big hands and pain. All encompassing heartbreak and abandonment.
"I have no place in this world." My answer is instant and true. I have never belonged. I have yearned for a place I never knew. I finally know how to get there. Death.
"I can give you death, young one," he says, stepping closer. I watch him silently. He is obviously not human. Maybe he will make it quick. "You have much potential."
I squint at him and suddenly he is embracing me. I don't fight him off of me. I am just a ragdoll in his arms. He will give me what I want.
"This will hurt," he murmured. His nose ran up my neck slowly. "You will awaken as death and whomever hurt you will fall at your feet."
Before I could think about what he meant, sharp pain radiated from my neck. I grunted as he drank my blood fervently. When he detached from me my vision became blurry. Suddenly, it felt like acid had been pour into my veins. I could hear my screams echoing through the trees.
When my heart finally stopped I thought I was finally dead. I thought maybe I was in the abyss of nothingness that I longed for. That was until the burning began.
I opened my eyes and wished I didn't. I stared at the ceiling like it was the most interesting thing I had ever seen. As I looked around I couldn't help but feel awe overtake me. Everything was amplified and clearer than I'd ever seen it before. I felt like I had new eyes.
A movement in another room catches my attention. I'm up and crouched in second. A growling noise emanates from my chest.
My brows raise in surprise. What is wrong with me?
"You're a vampire, young Ivy." I growled threateningly at the man that appears before me. How does he know my name?
He is familiar. Flashes of a cliff and red eyes come to me suddenly. Rage courses through my body. "My name is Joseph. I am your sire and teacher."
"I wanted to die." My jaw drops at my voice. It sounded like sex. Husky and low. The man grins at my reaction.
"You are dead. You have no heartbeat," he said matter of factly. I growl in frustration. I did not want this. "You are eternally death. A creature of the night. You will bring death to many humans. Don't you feel the power? You are immortal."
I straighten from my crouch slowly as I think. I do feel powerful. The tired depression is gone. The internal pain is gone. There is only thirst. I grab my throat as the flames crackle.
"It is time to hunt, my childe," he said, smirking.
We ran into Seattle. I was awed by the feeling of strength I felt. My legs didn't feel tired and I didn't feel winded. All I felt was power and thirst radiating through me.
We came into an alley where a man and a woman stood kissing. I held my breath as we strode toward them with purpose. Joseph whispered for me to take the male and I nodded absentmindedly. He looked strong. I could see the vein pumping in his neck.
They startled when we appeared behind them. The woman tried to scream but Joseph grabbed her and began to drink. I grabbed the man as he tried to run. When I inhaled the thirst became too strong. My body acted on its own. My teeth sank into his thick neck like butter to a hot knife. As soon as the blood met my tongue I moaned deeply.
He tasted like the ripest strawberry in existence. He tastes like the fruit of the Gods in my mouth. I gulped and gulped until he was a dry husk and then sucked some more. I growled angrily and threw the body away. He wasn't enough.
"Don't become angry. This city is a feast for our kind," Joseph rasped from behind me.
I looked down at the mans corpse curiously. I had killed a man. He had done nothing wrong except be human. I waited for guilt to flood my body. I waited in vain. It never came. Even as my sire and I slaughtered five more people. The guilt never came. I don't know if that made me feel or worse.
I stayed with Joseph for 6 years. He was a good man at heart but he had a problem with my lack of feelings for him. He wanted my love and devotion. For me to be his mate. Sadly, I was not attracted to him in the way. The sex was great but I preferred the fairer sex. I owed him a lot. He'd taught me to control my thirst and helped me develope my gift.
It turned out the Joseph could read minds but only through touch. It was a convenient tool to help me develop my own. We discovered that I could implant subconscious thoughts into the mind. He helped me to make it easy and without struggle. Not even he himself could not fight the urges I implanted into his mind. In the end, when I wanted out, he couldn't find the will to object.
As I ran into Forks, I smelled a variety of scents. The smell of wet dog and vampire permeated the area. This intrigued me even though it should have sent me packing. I had never met a shifter but Joseph had. He told me they were as big as horses and could tear us apart.
He also told me about the animal feeders. I couldn't understand how they did it. I'd experimented with it once and declared I would never do it again without proper cause.
It was like tofu compared to a ribeye steak.
I followed the scent to a meadow. It was quite beautiful. It bloomed with beautiful plants and I stood admiring it for a moment. As I inhaled, I smelled a delicious human scent. It was an older scent but it still made my mouth water. I followed it eagerly.
My nose carried me to a two story, white house. An old orange truck sat in the drive alone. It was a nice truck despite the rust.
It reminded me of my truck when I was human.
The window on the top floor was open. I sat in a tree listening to the humans heart thudding slowly in her chest. She sat on a chair staring out at the woods. For a moment I thought she saw me but her heartbeat remained steady.
The girl looked like death. There were bags under her eyes and her hair hung lifelessly. Her stare was absent, like she was remembering something. I knew what she was feeling immediately. I had been there and done that. Something in this girl's life had broken her. She had shut down and let the pain take over.
Sympathy overwhelmed me. I felt the need to talk to her and let her know everything was okay. That life goes on. I had no idea how. I didn't want to risk letting her find out what I am. My skin is deep caramel but it still has an odd palor. My blood red eyes give it away. I decided I would watch her and make sure she didn't hurt herself.
I watched over the girl, Bella, like a hawk. I learned her schedule and decided to introduce myself while she was at work. There she would see me as only a customer. I would create conversation and plant the idea of me as a friend into her mind.
I strode into the store confidently. My favorite tight ripped jeans sat comfortably on my waist and my crop top accentuated my toned stomach. I ran a hand through my hair as I walked up to the counter. It was long enough to put into a bun but I left it down. I liked running my hands through it.
Bella looked toward me and her heart began to beat a little faster. Her eyes lingered on my torso. When she looked into my eyes her heart when haywire. I frowned as I came up to the counter.
"Where are your backpacks," I asked, casually. She stared at me for a moment before speaking. Her eyes were like saucers.
"T-they're in the back," she stammered.
I reached out with my gift and tried to implant and idea into her mind. She just stared at me in fear. I frowned heavily and tried again. She just continued to stare. What the fuck? I guess my plan is ruined.
I walked into the back of the store and picked out a black leather bag. As I came back up to the counter Bella looked deathly pale. Her hands shook as she scanned the tag on my item.
"Are you okay," I asked, softly. Bella flushed. The girl looked like she might faint.
"Are you with Victoria?" I squinted at her. I had no idea who this Victoria was.
"No, I don't know her." She looked slightly relieved and nodded. She told me the price and I handed her the money. As I began to walk away, Bella stopped me. I turned around slowly and raised my brows at her.
"I... I know what you are."
My undead heart dropped into my stomach.