Title : Know
Author : sKiTzO sHy VioLeT
Rating : PG I spose
Author's Note : A story written for school. Sort of a prequel to "One Must Be Broken"

~*~

Will stood for a moment, unable to believe what he'd done. Reaching out to where the hole once gaped he felt a tug at his heart. It was almost as bad as the one he'd felt when he'd left Kirjava, whose name he hadn't known at the time.

"No," he told himself. "It's worse than that."

"What's that?" Mary looked at him with a look of sorrow and understanding.

"Nothing." Will replied. "You wouldn't understand."

Though his words were cruel and biting Mary said nothing in response. Will was in a lot of pain and she knew and understood that. Weeping silently for him she turned and walked in the direction of her apartment. Will didn't follow right away, but of course she hadn't expected him to. He stayed behind and removed the knife from its case. He turned it over and over in his hands feeling the burnt handle, wishing for Lyra.

Trembling he held the knife out and let his consciousness move to the tip. He felt the air for the small fractures and let the blade rest for a second in the one he knew as Cittagazze. It had been his and Lyra's special world for a short time. A haven. It was where they first met. And while it was a world neither he nor Lyra were born in it was theirs.

He felt Mary's hand on his shoulder. He had been taking longer than she expected so she'd turned back for him.

"It'll be okay." She assured him and presently he began to weep.

~*~

"Oh Serafina!" Lyra sobbed, throwing herself to the ground. "I can't bear it!"

Serafina Pekkala, with her hundreds of years of age and wisdom, just stood watching as a boy, William Parry, closed a window between two worlds, destroying a love, perhaps forever.

"Oh Serafina!" Lyra continued her tear choked cries. "I can't bear it! I en't gonna see him again! Never! I can't bear it!" And she lay on the ground for some time, gasps and sobs racking her entire being.

The witch queen continued to stand watching, her strong reserve slipping enough to allow a solitary tear to leave its salty scar upon her cheek.

~*~

When the waves of tears subsided and he was able to wipe the moisture off of his face with his good hand Will raised the knife once more. Mary watched as he studied for the second time since he closed the window between him and his love.

"Will," she nearly whispered, afraid to shatter the fragility of the moment and thus betray Will's trust. "I know what you're thinking."

"I can't bear to break it." He told her in a far off voice. "It's hard enough I have to leave her, but to break the only hope of seeing her? No. No, I won't. I know I'll never be able to use it, but at least this way there's some trickle of hope. If I break it this time there'll be no bear king to mend it. I'll be even more lost without it."

Mary nodded and placed her hands on Will's shoulders. "Now listen, Will." she said knowing how deeply he loved the wild orphan girl he'd just left. "And listen good. Don't break that knife. You hear me? Don't. You and me, we're going to reach out to people. We'll make so much Dust, or Shadows, or sraf, or whatever that the mulefa will have more seed pods than they know what to do with. There'll be so much of it that it'll be so thick we'll *have* to be able to see it with the naked eye, and we'll have to cut through it with that knife of yours."

Will looked up at her, tears threatening once more, and she pressed on unable to stop in her enthusiasm.

"Then you'll make a window for just you and Lyra. No one will ever know. And it'll be in a place so hidden nobody will be able to find it. And you, Lyra, Pantailamon, and Kirjava will be together and be happy. That's how it has to be. And you know it. One specter is worth it. They move in groups so what is one more going to do? You know it. You do."

Kirjava leapt into his arms and together they looked once more at the place where the window once was. Where their loves once were. Both felt the other's pain as people and their dæmons do, and finally Will nodded.

"I do. I know it."

~*~

So what do you think? I was trying out a new writing style for me. Should I keep it?