Disclaimer: I wish I wish I owned Danny Phantom! Desiree: -turns me into Butch Hartman- AHHHHHHHHH! CHANGE ME BACK CHANGE ME BACK! -is changed back-

Summary: Vlad felt his eye twitched dangerously as the news sunk in. Why did life hate him so much?

Rating: K+

Inspiration: Couldn't sleep, came up with this.

Pairings: MaddiexJack

Warnings: None really. Kind of rushed and bad, but kind of funny

Other Notes: Contains two OCs

"Is she alright?" Vlad asked the vet. Lately, Maddie the cat had been changing physically. Her appetite was increasing, she seemed to be getting larger. The cat had also began to laze around a lot more and was laying next to Vlad instead of scratching at his legs to play or exploring the castle. The cat was only a year old, so it wasn't age.

"Congratulations Mr. Masters. I did a quick scan and we discovered that Maddie is about 60 days pregnant. She's due to give birth anyday now."

Vlad felt his eye twitched dangerously as the news sunk in. Why did life hate him so much? He only half-listened to the doctor's instructions on how to care for her and prepare her for the birth. First thing when he got home was to kill that blasted cat and his owner.

Three Months Ago

Vlad walked outside to get his newspaper. His hair was sleep-messy and he wore his fancy robe and slippers. Grey-blue eyes narrowed as he glared at a fat black, orange and white cat crawling through his yard.

"Shoo!" he hissed waving his paper at it. The cat blinked before walking towards him. Vlad stepped back, but the cat instead came up and purred, rubbing against his legs. Vlad wanted to kick it. The only cat he really cared for was Maddie.

"Jack! Come here boy!"

Vlad looked up and glared as a teen girl with dark red hair tied back in a high ponytail and green eyes wearing a private school uniform jump over the hedges separating their yards into his. She scooped up the fat cat and held it. The cat purred and rested calmly in her arms.

"I'm sorry Mr. Masters. Jack must have snuck out when Dad left for work this morning," she apologized.

"Jack?" Vlad repeated, glaring at the cat. The cat blinked back. It was fat and mostly orange. Like the fat oaf. "Oh! Just keep your fat cat off my property!"

"Jack isn't fat!" the girl insisted, shifting him in her arms. "He's just a big boy."

"I don't care," Vlad replied a bit hotly. The girl mirrored his glare as she walked back towards her house. She put the cat into her family's large mansion next to Vlad's before stepping into a limo, which drove off.

Vlad figured that it would be the last time he would ever see that fat cat.

Vlad shrieked when he noticed, a week later, the fat cat napping in his yard. In his robe, slippers and messy hair, he tried to chase it off.

"Shoo!" he yelled, getting the hose and preparing to turn it on. He sprayed the cat, making it meow loudly and dash into his house. "NOT INTO MY HOUSE!"

The teen girl from next door opened the door and stepped outside. Vlad pointed his finger at her and glared.

"Get your fat cat out of my house!" he yelled at her.

The girl quickly jumped over the hedges and into his yard. Vlad noticed that, being a Saturday, the girl was in a dark purple and black pajama t-shirt and pants. Her hair was a frizzy mess, falling into her make-up less face. The girl dashed inside and emerged five minutes later with a damp cat.

"I figured you'd like Jack," she commented, brushed hair behind her ear. "Considering you have a cute one yourself. What's her name?"

"Did something happen to Maddie? And I don't care for fat cats that wander into my yard and run around my house!" Vlad hissed back.

"Maddie's fine," she said with a roll of her eyes. "And I told you, Jack's not fat! He's just a big boy! I only mentioned your cat because Jack was making friends. They were both hanging around on her scratching post, which is really nice by the way. Where'd you get it?"

"Custom-made," Vlad said a bit coldly, pushed her towards her house slightly. "Please keep the fat cat off my property."

"Jack is not fat, he's just a big boy," she insisted.

"Whatever! I don't want to see it again!" Vlad snapped. The girl rolled her eyes and took a step over the hedges and into her house.

Over the next five weeks, that stupid fat cat kept showing up. Or as Roxxie insisted, the clever big boy. No matter what, he saw or heard of that cat. Every. Single. Day.

Yes, he got on a first-name basis with Jack's owner. Roxxie was trying everything to keep Jack at home. She was even placing him in his crate. Whenever Jack couldn't come over, Maddie would casually trot over, which would result in Roxxie knocking at his door to return his cat.

Vlad was annoyed, frustrated and angry with this, while Roxxie was amused, surprised and enjoying it. It was almost hilarious to see Vlad blow up over the cat now. Not to mention she was amused and surprised by the cleverness of their cats.

"Come on Mr. Masters! They like each other! Why not let them play together?" she tried to reason with him occasionally.

"No! I don't want that fat cat near my Maddie!" he hissed which would spark an argument about if Jack was really just a big boy or fat.

Then that magical time came. The two saw each other a little less, mainly due to Maddie becoming a bit lazier and fatter. Last time Roxxie saw her, she first made a joke that now he couldn't talk about Jack's weight after seeing Maddie's growing stomach. Then she suggested taking her to a doctor in case it was an infection.

So here he was. Basically learning that life was basically making fun of him again.