Tifa rested her forehead against the glass of the window in her room, her throat aching with the effort to keep the sobs back.
I'm not going to cry, she told herself firmly. I don't ever cry. I will never cry.
She sighed deeply, looking out at the sleeping city of Midgar past her deep brown bangs. Why couldn't Cloud just see how she felt about him? See how she loved him? Couldn't he just- figuratively- open his eyes for once? Those amazing, deep, gorgeous cerulean eyes...
And against her will, a single tear slipped down Tifa's cheek. He was going to break her heart one day.
Cloud finished tying his boots, and soundlessly stood. He'd heard Tifa going to her room a few minutes previously- maybe she was asleep now. Maybe he would check on her once before going out again on one of his late-night drives on Fenrir. She always seemed to need checking on.
The blonde warrior silently padded down the hallway of the upstairs in the darkness, quickly noticing that Tifa's door was open. Curiously, he didn't touch anything, just peering in through the half-open door. Naturally, his heart gave a pang as he saw she was just standing there, holding her arms, head leaned against the window, crying. Cloud blinked. Tifa didn't cry. Tifa never cried.
And yet, here she was with the small, liquid crystals slipping down her angel's face.
He shook his head suddenly, setting his blonde hair swaying. She didn't like him. Not like he liked her. No, he loved her. But she didn't love him. She was always separating herself from him and the others, not responding when he said something to her that wasn't part of a strategy. She always turned her face away, her wine-colored eyes glimmering with something, and said nothing to him. Of course she didn't like him.
Cloud stayed in the blackened hallway for a moment, just watching Tifa from the shadows. It would have been obvious to anyone that she didn't see him, either because she wasn't looking or because Cloud was in shadow- but it didn't really matter. The warrior's cerulean eyes gazed at her, before he turned quietly, going down the stairs. He reflected briefly at how much he loved her, how much he cared for her. And she didn't return it.
Oh, she had to be aware of how he felt. But she didn't feel the same, Cloud concluded. She always pushed him away... And since he'd known her. Which had been when they were kids, playing on the playground of Midgar.
Suddenly, Cloud gritted his teeth fiercely as his arm throbbed, feeling like it had been pierced by a thousand needles. No. Worse. Flattened by a million sledgehammers. No. Worse. Burning alive by flames that would melt the very planet itself. He let out a long, quiet exhale as the horrid, burning pain faded, and ran his other hand through hsi blonde hair. There was just no cure for Geostigma.
And eventually, Cloud was going to die from it. And until it was too late- which it already was- Tifa would never- could never- know.
Walking to the door, Cloud opened it, but winced when the bells on the door jangled. He'd forgotten about them.
"Cloud? You're leaving again?"
He cringed, not from the surprise of the voice, but who it belonged to and the tone. Tifa's voice was defeated, broken, and in general put down. However, he managed to compose his face before turning to her.
"Yes," he said emotionlessly. Tifa blinked, and Cloud felt a pang as he saw her eyes were rimmed red and she still hugged her arms. She nodded, blinking a little faster, and looked down at her feet. This was what she always did. When he spoke to her, she looked away or at something else.
Then out of nowhere Tifa charged forwards towards Cloud, hair flying out behind her, crashing into his chest. Cloud was surprised when her arms locked around him, feeling her face pressing into his chest. Automatically, his arms went around Tifa's upper back, just holding her. She made no sound, but after a few moments, Cloud felt slight drops of wet on his shirt. She was still crying?
"Tifa," he murmured gently to her, confused. "Tifa, are you okay?"
"Yes," she sniffled, but her voice wasn't anything close to convincing.
"Tifa," he said sternly, but softly, running a gloved hand over her near-black hair. She said nothing this time, tightening her grip slightly around him. And that was when Cloud realized it.
Tifa did love him. She needed him, just as much as he needed her. She loved him. A tiny, faint ghost of a smile touched his face, and he held her tighter, murmuring soothing words into her ear while she just cried. Then suddenly, his arm felt pierced again, burned, crushed, and exploded all at the same time. Cloud winced, but since Tifa's face was buried in his chest, she didn't see this. Oh, sure, Geostigma. Perfect timing. Just when he was holding and comforting the woman of his dreams, it had to kick in.
Cloud just stood there after it faded, stroking Tifa's hair and holding her close. He wasn't aware of how much time had passed, but he was sure it was more than a few minutes.
As such, it was only when he heard a light snuffle that he went to hold her at arm's length- but she collapsed into his arms again.
Was... had she... she had. She did.
Tifa had fallen asleep. Against Cloud. And clearly, it was only Cloud himself that kept her upright at all. She was truly and fully out. Cloud simply scooped her up in his arms, carrying her upstairs. She breathed softly in his arms, her eyes moving lightly under her eyelids, still red-rimmed.
Cloud wondered briefly while he settled her into bed. Why was it that Tifa didn't let anyone close to her? Even those who loved her? it was his opinion, as he pulled the blankets up on her and sat by the bed, that... he had been waiting his whole life. Waiting for her, or someone identical to her. Why didn't she let anyone love her? Was it because she was afraid of getting hurt?
Cloud supressed a hiss again as the Geostigma acted up under his sleeve and glove. Tifa was running out of time if she did love him. Which he was now sure she did. She was running out of time, the days, the minutes slipping away like sands in an hourglass. Time was precious.
It was amazing and appalling at how little people like them seemed to realize that.