Very fluffy. Been writing modern fictions and will get back to those but fancied writing this. This 'happens' on the evening Lady Cora loses her baby. From Anna's POV.

Walking outside, stopping just after I step over the threshold, I allow the events of the day to sink in as the cool evening breeze caresses my face. Such sad news, a terrible thing to go through no matter your social class, race, religion, whatever. Closing my eyes, I take in a deep breath before the sound of wood hitting the floor disturbs me from my thoughts. It's a familiar sound and recently, a sound that has me smiling instantly. No matter what trials and tribulations the world can throw at this house and those who inhabit it, as long as I can still hear what I am hearing right now, I'll be thankful. The sound gets nearer before it stops. The only thing audible then is the sound of his breathing. The feel of his breath on my neck sending shivers down my spine. Mr Bates.

'I see you've come to my thinking place again,' he whispers and I smile as I watch him walk past me before realising something.

'Hang on,' I reply in mock protest. Following him to a nearby stack of crates which he has sat upon, I stand in front of him. My arms are folded as he looks up at me with a smile that warms my soul. 'It was my thinking place before you even knew it existed.'

He lets out a small laugh before moving up and gesturing for me to sit down. 'Thomas has been in his room since the fight,' I say. 'What a thing to say to William...'

'I don't wish to waste yours or my breath on the man.' is his short reply.

We sit in silence for a while, me wondering what he is thinking of. Sighing gently, I can tell he uses this as an indication for me to know he is about to say something. Instinct tells me to look for his gaze and I find it. It is in these moments, when he looks at me, I feel like I can hardly breathe.

'How is her ladyship, her daughters?' He asks, and I can tell in the sincerity in his tone that his enquiry isn't just a way to break the silence, he is genuinely concerned for their welfare.

'Fine,' I nod. 'Well Lady Mary and her sisters are bearing up. Her Ladyship, well what a terrible thing for any woman to have to go through. I know I couldn't bear it.' Looking him in the eye, he affords me a small smile. 'How is Lord Grantham?'

Again he sighs, a beautiful sound so full of emotion as he looks to the heavens. 'He's not good. Turns out the baby was a boy. He desperately loves his daughters but any man, with all he has to pass on to an heir...' He stops then and closes his eyes. 'No, any man, despite his wealth, longs for a son.'

His admission surprises me. Mr Bates was usually so guarded over his feelings, never one to wear his heart on his sleeve. Here he was, albeit entirely indirectly, telling me he wanted, or had at least thought about wanting children. I suppose personal tragedy brings that side out in people. A question is burning away inside me, the residue of what he has just revealed.

'Do you... Mr Bates, want...' What is it about this man. Sometimes he causes me to lose all cohesion.

'Do I want children?' he comes to my aid and I am relieved to see a grin on his face after fearing I may have spoken out of turn. 'Men do think about these things as well, Anna.'

And now I fear I may have upset him. 'Of course they do, I was simply...'

'There is nothing some men want more,' he interrupts, 'than to come home after a long day at work to a wife and children he loves with all his heart and soul.' Now staring straight ahead, I can tell he is picturing the perfect scene he is describing in his mind. I feel a twinge of longing inside me. Realising that I so desperately want it to be me that he is imagining as his wife, I curse myself for my bold thinking, even though I have kept my acknowledgment within me.

'At one point in my life,' he continues, 'when I was in the army, the thought that one day I might have children was all that kept me going. His Lordship told me about his family, I was jealous.'

'But you had Mrs Bates...' I reply. 'Did you never want children with her.' Before it's even out of my mouth, I am chiding myself over my intrusive line of questioning.

Bashfully, I turn my head slowly to look at him before he continues. 'I could have had children with Vera, but it would only have been them I'd have loved with all my heart and soul.'

Our eyes meet once again, a hundred questions whirring around my mind. He can tell I have things to say, things to ask him. It's like no other human being has known me as completely as he does. Amazing when I remember we aren't, for want of a better phrase, even stepping out with each other.

There is something I can't put my finger on, something that endears me to him. Ever since I have known him he has always allowed an air of mystery to surround himself. It's in these rare moments when he lets his barricades down for a short time, that I realise I want to know everything about him.

'So you have never loved a woman with all your heart and soul then, Mr Bates?' I ask.

'Well, I wouldn't say that,' he replies and my breath is completely taken away as I feel his fingers rub the back of my hand. This is his almost cryptic way of telling me he loved me. He didn't need to tell me. I could tell by the way he behaved when he was around me. Still there had been a number of occasions where he left me in no doubt as to what his feelings were. This was one of those times.

Moving his fingers to entwine with my own, the sweetness of his touch is tinged with pain. Pain because I know that this is all it can be between us. Until he finds his wife, the woman he married yet didn't love completely, we would be stuck in this predicament.

'All that's happened today adds to my argument that life isn't fair.' I murmur.

'How so?' He asks, his grip on my hand becoming tighter.

Looking at him, I stop myself before speaking. I could sit here and whine at him. Reprimand him for entering into a loveless marriage. Criticise him for not being more proactive in the search for his wife. But then I realise everything that has gone on in his past has made him the person I am in love with today. Deep down, I wouldn't change a thing about him.

'It doesn't matter,' I smile, struggling to hold back my emotions. He observes this, I can tell and his hand releases mine before his arm finds it's way around my waist. As chaste as this gesture is, if anyone saw this it would be enough to arise suspicions. He doesn't care and in this moment, neither do I.

'Do you want children, Anna?' he whispers, looking around the courtyard for any witnesses as he moves closer to me. 'A family?'

'Yes.' I reply, nodding as a solitary tear runs down my cheek.

'I don't know if this helps, probably not, but I cannot explain or express how much I want to be the man to give you that.' he lifts his hand to my face and wipes the tear from my cheek.

'I want that too.' I gasp. 'More than anything.'

'Believe me Anna, our children wouldn't be the only thing I loved with all my heart and soul.'

Sighing, I close my eyes as a small laugh escapes me. Damn him for saying such a beautiful thing, knowing there is only a small chance this wonderful scenario could ever come true.

Still, what he had just said gave me something to hold on to. If it was up to him, we would be together. Knowing that I was living in a world where Mr Bates loved me was enough. For now, it had to be.

Remembering what my employers has been through today, I curse myself for getting upset. Standing up, releasing myself from his hold, I start towards the door. Stopping, I look back over my shoulder. 'Aren't you coming in, Mr Bates?'