Disclaimer: WarCraft 3 is owned by Blizzard. Errol is a real person. A damn irritating one. This story is mine.
WarCraft III: Errol, The Windy Ghoul
This is the story of Errol, a lowly, yet arrogant braggart of a Ghoul. He had the odd ability to create winds whenever he spoke. He was crafted as one of Kel'Thuzad's underlings. Well......not exactly.
Kel'Thuzad: ( shouting ) Errol!! Errol, you stupid Ghoul!! Get your Undead @$$ over here at once!!
Errol: ( dressed in a plaid shirt and trailing jeans ) Coming my lord.....
Ghoul 1: Did it just get windier here all of a sudden?
Ghoul 2: Yup, much windier when he came in.
Errol: Huh? ( his two little slits for eyes blink )
Errol, oddly enough, is completely oblivious to the fact that nobody likes him.
Kel'Thuzad: ERROL!!!
Errol: Yes?
Kel'Thuzad: ( hits him on the head with his staff, knocking it off ) You can go now.
Errol: ( trying to pick his head up ) Yes lord.
Ghoul 1: Guys!! Look!! A soccer ball!!
Ghoul 2: ( kicking Errol's head ) Let's play!!
Errol: ( head flying through the air ) AAHHH!!!! ( crashes into a wall and gets run over by a Meat Wagon )
This is a typical day for Errol, until Arthas took over. Where.......
Errol: I got promoted!! I got promoted!! ( the Ghoul closest to him is sent flying by a great gust of wind )
Ghoul 1: ( shock ) You did?!?!?!?
Errol: Yeah, Lord Arthas said so.
Arthas: Yes. From underling to bootlicker. Now, lick my boots.
Errol: YES LORD!! ( proceeds licking boots )
Arthas: ( kicks Errol's head away ) HAHAHAHA!!!
Ghoul 2: ( whispering ) Isn't that a demotion, lord?
Arthas: Yes.
Ghoul 1: Then why?
Arthas: This Black Citadel needs something to make it colder.
Ghoul 1: Oh......
Ghoul 2: But his wind is uncontrollable!! He'll blow away the Blithe!! He'll destroy the ziggurats!! We'll have no food!!
Arthas: Cannibalize.
Abomination: Only Ghouls can do that.......
Arthas: I see. Ah. Errol!!!
Errol: Yes? ( An Acolyte passing by is blown to bits )
Arthas: I'm promoting you again. You're in charge of the base until i'm gone. You are not to create any new Undead without my orders.
Errol: YAY!!! ( the Black Citadel is almost blown off it's base )
Arthas: Now go away. ( once Errol leaves ) Now, pack up. We're moving to Northrend.
Alone, Errol is......well........
Errol: I rule!! You!! Underling!!
Silence.......
Errol: Wait. I have no Underlings. D'oh!!
Sylvanas Windrunner: DESTROY THE EVILS!!!
Errol: Uh-oh....
3 days later, he mysteriously survives. As an Abomination. With no eyes. He has wandered into Stromguarde.
Errol: ( bumping into a castle, which is instantly demolished by his HUGE belly, the size of Mannoroth ) Ouch.
Tonwsfolk: AAAAHHHH!!!!! THE SCOURGE ARE COMING!!!
Errol: Can somebody please give me an eye?
Footman Captain: Someone call Lord Uther!! ( blown away by the whirlwind that is Errol's speech ) AAAHHHH!!!!
Uther: ( running to Errol ) DIE MONSTER!!! YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD!!!
Errol: It was not by my hand that I was once again given flesh. I was called here by......humans.....who wish to pay me tribute.
Uther: Tribute? You steal men's souls, and make them your slaves.
Errol: ( sneezes, Uther gets blown away ) Huh?
Uther: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!
Errol: I need an eye. ( trips over a farm ) Ouch.
Crypt Fiend: Damn you, whore!! Now we're lost!! Stupid Banshee!!
Banshee: Sorry. Hey, an Abomination! Maybe he knows where Arthas is.
Crypt Fiend: You DO have a brain.
Banshee: ( whispering to herself ) I had brains enough to fake an orgasm last night......stupid spider.
Crypt Fiend: You know where Northrend is?
Errol: Why? I don't think so.
Banshee: Damn! Now we'll never get to Arthas and the others.
Errol: WHAT?!?! ( tramples all over the two ) I GOTTA GO THERE!!! GOTTA GET ME AN EYE!!!
A week later, Errol stops to take a drink at a fountain. The Sun Well of the High Elves. He then becomes a Lich. He's still got no eyes.
Errol: Now, to Northrend. ( walks off )
Problem is, he somehow ends up in Kalimdor, near the human settlements. At the time, Thrall and Jaina Proudmoore were......negotiating.
Jaina: ( moaning in pleasure ) AHH!! More Warchief!! More!!
Thrall: As you wish....
Grunt: Lord Thrall!!! The Undead are.........( drool )........
Thrall: ( chain lightings the Grunt, turns to Jaina ) Now, where were we?
Footman: Lady Jaina!!! An Undead monster is coming!!
Jaina: Don't bother me!! Can't you see i'm getting screwed here?!?! ( hits the Footman with a Blizzard ) You're much better than that old man Antonidas.
Thrall: What about Arthas?
Jaina: He can't even get it up. He's impotent you know.
Errol: Boss Arthas!!! Where are you?!?! ( bumps into Jaina and Thrall's love nest )
Thrall: More interruptions?!
Jaina: Just when I was so close!!! ( polymorphs Errol into a camel with wings ) Let's start all over again....
Grom: ( sees what Thrall and Jaina were doing instead of negotiating ) HOW DARE YOU?!?! YOU HAVE DEFILED YOUR ORCISH HERITAGE!!!
Jaina: ( grabbing Grom's hardened thing ) Wanna join us? ( mounts him )
Grom: ( horny look ) Sure!!
After a while, Errol, now a blind camel wanders back to Lordaeron, where Mannoroth is destroying everything.
Mannoroth: ( steps on Errol ) Huh? Oh, just a camel. Ghouls!!
Ghouls: Yes?
Mannoroth: ( tosses Errol's corpse to them ) Eat that.
Ghouls: YAY!!!
Thus ended the life of Errol, the Windy Ghoul.
WarCraft III: Errol, The Windy Ghoul
This is the story of Errol, a lowly, yet arrogant braggart of a Ghoul. He had the odd ability to create winds whenever he spoke. He was crafted as one of Kel'Thuzad's underlings. Well......not exactly.
Kel'Thuzad: ( shouting ) Errol!! Errol, you stupid Ghoul!! Get your Undead @$$ over here at once!!
Errol: ( dressed in a plaid shirt and trailing jeans ) Coming my lord.....
Ghoul 1: Did it just get windier here all of a sudden?
Ghoul 2: Yup, much windier when he came in.
Errol: Huh? ( his two little slits for eyes blink )
Errol, oddly enough, is completely oblivious to the fact that nobody likes him.
Kel'Thuzad: ERROL!!!
Errol: Yes?
Kel'Thuzad: ( hits him on the head with his staff, knocking it off ) You can go now.
Errol: ( trying to pick his head up ) Yes lord.
Ghoul 1: Guys!! Look!! A soccer ball!!
Ghoul 2: ( kicking Errol's head ) Let's play!!
Errol: ( head flying through the air ) AAHHH!!!! ( crashes into a wall and gets run over by a Meat Wagon )
This is a typical day for Errol, until Arthas took over. Where.......
Errol: I got promoted!! I got promoted!! ( the Ghoul closest to him is sent flying by a great gust of wind )
Ghoul 1: ( shock ) You did?!?!?!?
Errol: Yeah, Lord Arthas said so.
Arthas: Yes. From underling to bootlicker. Now, lick my boots.
Errol: YES LORD!! ( proceeds licking boots )
Arthas: ( kicks Errol's head away ) HAHAHAHA!!!
Ghoul 2: ( whispering ) Isn't that a demotion, lord?
Arthas: Yes.
Ghoul 1: Then why?
Arthas: This Black Citadel needs something to make it colder.
Ghoul 1: Oh......
Ghoul 2: But his wind is uncontrollable!! He'll blow away the Blithe!! He'll destroy the ziggurats!! We'll have no food!!
Arthas: Cannibalize.
Abomination: Only Ghouls can do that.......
Arthas: I see. Ah. Errol!!!
Errol: Yes? ( An Acolyte passing by is blown to bits )
Arthas: I'm promoting you again. You're in charge of the base until i'm gone. You are not to create any new Undead without my orders.
Errol: YAY!!! ( the Black Citadel is almost blown off it's base )
Arthas: Now go away. ( once Errol leaves ) Now, pack up. We're moving to Northrend.
Alone, Errol is......well........
Errol: I rule!! You!! Underling!!
Silence.......
Errol: Wait. I have no Underlings. D'oh!!
Sylvanas Windrunner: DESTROY THE EVILS!!!
Errol: Uh-oh....
3 days later, he mysteriously survives. As an Abomination. With no eyes. He has wandered into Stromguarde.
Errol: ( bumping into a castle, which is instantly demolished by his HUGE belly, the size of Mannoroth ) Ouch.
Tonwsfolk: AAAAHHHH!!!!! THE SCOURGE ARE COMING!!!
Errol: Can somebody please give me an eye?
Footman Captain: Someone call Lord Uther!! ( blown away by the whirlwind that is Errol's speech ) AAAHHHH!!!!
Uther: ( running to Errol ) DIE MONSTER!!! YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD!!!
Errol: It was not by my hand that I was once again given flesh. I was called here by......humans.....who wish to pay me tribute.
Uther: Tribute? You steal men's souls, and make them your slaves.
Errol: ( sneezes, Uther gets blown away ) Huh?
Uther: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!
Errol: I need an eye. ( trips over a farm ) Ouch.
Crypt Fiend: Damn you, whore!! Now we're lost!! Stupid Banshee!!
Banshee: Sorry. Hey, an Abomination! Maybe he knows where Arthas is.
Crypt Fiend: You DO have a brain.
Banshee: ( whispering to herself ) I had brains enough to fake an orgasm last night......stupid spider.
Crypt Fiend: You know where Northrend is?
Errol: Why? I don't think so.
Banshee: Damn! Now we'll never get to Arthas and the others.
Errol: WHAT?!?! ( tramples all over the two ) I GOTTA GO THERE!!! GOTTA GET ME AN EYE!!!
A week later, Errol stops to take a drink at a fountain. The Sun Well of the High Elves. He then becomes a Lich. He's still got no eyes.
Errol: Now, to Northrend. ( walks off )
Problem is, he somehow ends up in Kalimdor, near the human settlements. At the time, Thrall and Jaina Proudmoore were......negotiating.
Jaina: ( moaning in pleasure ) AHH!! More Warchief!! More!!
Thrall: As you wish....
Grunt: Lord Thrall!!! The Undead are.........( drool )........
Thrall: ( chain lightings the Grunt, turns to Jaina ) Now, where were we?
Footman: Lady Jaina!!! An Undead monster is coming!!
Jaina: Don't bother me!! Can't you see i'm getting screwed here?!?! ( hits the Footman with a Blizzard ) You're much better than that old man Antonidas.
Thrall: What about Arthas?
Jaina: He can't even get it up. He's impotent you know.
Errol: Boss Arthas!!! Where are you?!?! ( bumps into Jaina and Thrall's love nest )
Thrall: More interruptions?!
Jaina: Just when I was so close!!! ( polymorphs Errol into a camel with wings ) Let's start all over again....
Grom: ( sees what Thrall and Jaina were doing instead of negotiating ) HOW DARE YOU?!?! YOU HAVE DEFILED YOUR ORCISH HERITAGE!!!
Jaina: ( grabbing Grom's hardened thing ) Wanna join us? ( mounts him )
Grom: ( horny look ) Sure!!
After a while, Errol, now a blind camel wanders back to Lordaeron, where Mannoroth is destroying everything.
Mannoroth: ( steps on Errol ) Huh? Oh, just a camel. Ghouls!!
Ghouls: Yes?
Mannoroth: ( tosses Errol's corpse to them ) Eat that.
Ghouls: YAY!!!
Thus ended the life of Errol, the Windy Ghoul.