Beep. Beep. Beep.
Why, why is it another summer? I was completely okay with having the whole camp to myself, and a few other campers. New summer, new campers, new people who annoy me out of my mind.
Great.
And get this- as a year-round camper, Chiron appointed me to be one of the tour guides to new half-bloods. Yep, I'm not kidding you. I'm going to be one of those overly-happy people who skips around showing new kids where the toilets are.
It's 7:45. 7:45 is not a reasonable hour for anyone to be awake, especially me. Who comes to camp at 7:45???
I pull on black skinny jeans and a gray t-shirt. If I am forced to do this job, there is no way I am wearing an orange "Camp Half-Blood" t-shirt. No way.
"Well, good morning, Nico!" Chiron literally yells as I leave my cabin. Does he not realize it is 7:45 AM? I probably said something back, but as it was so early my memory does not go back that far.
"Excited for a new summer?" He asks, obviously trying to engage me in conversation.
"Excited as I'll ever be," I say as I yawn.
"You have 5 new campers to show around. The first one is Gregory Smith, a son of Hermes."
Oh, yippee. I get to show some kid trees while he tries to steal stuff from me. I see a scrawny, red-head kid get out of a car and walk onto camp grounds. Hoping with every bone in my body that it's not Gregory Smith, I approach him.
"Hi, my name's Gregory Smith…" is all he says before I zone out. He'll probably want to be best friends forever and do 'friendy' things with me. Kill me.
"So, want to show me around?" He asks, after rambling on about his pet parakeet. "Sure. Okay, those are the woods. They have trees and grass and- hey, don't touch that," I yell as he grabs the gold bracelet around my wrist. Say what you want, tell me I'm gay, I don't care. It's my sister's. She gave it to me before she, you know, passed.
"What's that?" He asks, as if a bracelet is a new science specimen.
"Bracelet," I reply and continue the tour. "So, those are the bathrooms. There's the dining area…" I say as I look around the camp. Then I see a familiar figure walking towards me.
"Nico!" He literally screams and gives me a hug. Can you spell uncomfortable? Since when were we BFF's?
"Percy. Want to help this tour?" I ask. As Percy shakes his head and backs away, I smile.
"Gregory- this is Percy Jackson. He's Poseidon's son!" I say with the most enthusiasm I've had all morning.
"Wow, you're a son of the Big Three?" He asks, and follows Percy stealing pens from his backpack. Haha, if only he knew who my dad was.
"Well, good job with Gregory, Nico. Your next camper is Colleen Grace Wright," Chiron says. "Daughter of Aphrodite."
So after weirdo Gregory, I get some priss who will most likely have 15 Gucci suitcases for me to carry. Can this day get worse? Answer: no.
I walk to the front of camp, looking for a platinum-blonde spray-tanned girl wearing a micro-mini skirt and a skin tight tank top. Stereotypes have gotten to me a little.
"Hey, where am I supposed to go?" A blonde girl with braids asks. She's studying a map intensely, as if her life depended on where the forests are located.
"Your name?" I ask.
"Colleen Grace Wright…" she says. I'm shocked. For one thing, she's wearing a loose (LOOSE!) t-shirt with bunnies wearing dresses. Weird, but that's beside the point. She's also wearing normal-length shorts and black and white sneakers. Not your average Aphrodite kid.
"You okay in there?" She asks, as I obviously went into mega-shock mode.
"Um, yeah. You sure your mom is Aphrodite?" I ask. She just laughs. She laughs! I feel really stupid for a minute, then snap out of it.
"Okay, I'm Nico. Son of Hades. Now here's your tour," I say. The strangest thing about Colleen Grace is her face. I'm not trying to stare, but she's gorgeous. No makeup, no fancy hair, just plain her. I show her around the camp, and this time I give her a legit tour. Not any of that crap I gave to stupid Gregory Smith.
"Thanks!" She says as she walks back into her cabin. With two suitcases. Now, I find any more than one suitcase excessive, but compared to Miranda Lawson with 10 suitcases, I'm thinking she packed 'lightly'. Behind me, someone taps my back and scares me half to death.
"Oh my freaking gods…" I yell as I turn around and see a smirking blonde.
"Someone's found a loooove interest…" Annabeth says in a sarcastic voice.
"Shut. Up," I say and walk away. I don't like dealing with people like her at this hour. Actually, it's only 9:15, but I should be sleeping.
"And hi to you too. Yes, my summer was fine, and so is my family," She says. "Who peed in your cornflakes?" She asks as she walks over to Percy. After they started going out, it's impossible to get them apart. Speaking of cornflakes, I haven't had breakfast. I walk over to the dining area and grab some Cheerios. Why are they called that, anyway? I don't become more cheery when eating them. Is it implying that I should be more cheery when I eat them? Because if that's supposed to happen, I am misusing this product. My extremely important train of thought is lost as someone sits next to me. At the Hades table.
"Excuse me?" I ask, not looking up from my not-so-cheery-Cheerios.
"Oh, sorry, was someone going to sit here?" a familiar voice asks. Crap crap crap. Her again.
"No, um, you're just supposed to sit at your parent's table. You're supposed to eat with the Aphrodite kids," I say. She laughs at me. Again. That wasn't a joke- it was more of a statement.
"It's just that you act like the Aphrodite kids actually eat a substantial meal. They eat, like, a piece of lettuce and a cucumber slice," she says. How is this kid even related to Aphrodite? Well, I mean I see the resemblance, but really.
"Oh. Okay. Well, run along," I say. Run along? Did I seriously tell a gorgeous peer of mine to run along? Oh my freaking gods, I am the biggest idiot to walk the earth. And the underworld.
She just laughs and walks over to her table, where she eats an omelet with a ton of ketchup on it. The Aphrodite kids look at each other, both intrigued and appalled. I chuckle as I eat the last of my Cheerios. I walk over to Chiron, hoping my next three demigods I tour are really speedy tour-ees.