It was the middle of the night when Ryou woke up with a scream. As if the physical pain wasn't enough, but now he had to endure mental abuses as well.
The boy's head was spinning, his vision blurry. The dream felt so real, as if reality. At first, there was only cold and harsh darkness. Then a young vision of Ryou witnessed his mother and sister's car crash. There was so much blood; it seemed like not only the street, but the sky and the moon the red, too. His sister's small hand was lying about a meter from the car. His mother had been beheaded by the front glass. The body was hanging numbly, even a bit dumbly a few centimetres from its top. The remaining of his sister's body was on the other seat. It was twisted into some fatal unnatural position, like a broken puppet.
Ryou couldn't help but start screaming and running. However, he knew something was chasing him, someone was calling his name. The boy turned around to face the bodies of his family. His mom was holding her own blood- covered head in one hand, the other was held out towards her son. Actually, the fingers were twisted upwards, probably broken. Aname was right behind her. The girl was walking like a marionette in the hands of an inexperienced puppeteer. Half of her skull was gone and bits and pieces of brain were falling to the ground. Ryou was terrified.
He turned his back on them and ran and ran. "Why don't you come to us? Why don't you become like us?", they would ask.
Ryou could only run. Unfortunately, the more he advanced, the closer his dead family seemed to be. Finally, they got him- a trembling child. Stone cold fingers grasped him and held him tightly.
Soon the boy's petrified scream echoed through the darkness. A horrifying sound of tearing skin came. They were stripping him from his living skin and muscle tissue. The bones were left bare, as his two closest beings were feasting on him.
No escape!
But it was all just a nightmare, right?
The white demon in front of him wasn't. For about an ear his yami had a body and was living with Ryou. If the teen though that his previous life with his other half was bad, now it was worse. The two of them no longer shared a body, so Bakura no longer needed his landlord. The boy obediently took all the beatings and tried his best not to anger his yami. It all seemed futile. It was as if Ryou's very existence itself was the problem. The devious spirit was leaning against the wall, smirking and looking down on his ex-host. "My, my, dearie Ryou, did you happen to have a nightmare?" Bakura's voice came as a seducing purr. This meant nothing good for Ryou. The boy's eyes widened ad he feverishly nodded. "Have you lost your ability to speak, host?" The voice was harsh and was accompanied with a hard fist in the teen's stomach. The boy squeaked and tears rolled down his tortured face. The breath was immediately knocked out of him, but Ryou knew better than not to answer. "Y-y-y-yes... p-p-pleasee..." It sounded more like an incoherent sob. "Landlord, I couldn't hear you..." The mocking voice, followed by the laughter and finally an awfully painful pull at Ryou's ears. God, it felt like Bakura was going to rip them off. "Yes, I had a nightmare, master, please!" The teen's choked voice steadily turned into a scream. "Now, that was better, girly. However, I am bored, and you know what that means, right?" Bakura's voice was fakely soft, even gentle, but the following psychotic laugh gave away the grave intentions. Ryou squirmed again, drawing his knees and trying to get as far away from his yami as possible. The fear was so evident in the teen's eyes, tears were still leaking from them. The boy murmured so many pleas, but when Bakura grabbed him by the hair Ryou was practically screaming his begs. "Please, please, please, master, I will be good, I will do as you say, please, please, please, don't, I am sorry..."The yami threw his light off the pile of rugs he called bed, then hissed, "If you don't shut up, I will tear you apart!" Ryou stopped; only in his eyes were the fear and pleas evident. With his angelic chocolate orbs the boy tried to soothe his other half, but all in vain. The teen was dragged by his hair down the stairs towards the kitchen. No...No...No..., the boy screamed in his head. There were knives and fire in the kitchen... no... More tears soaked the already wet face. Struggling wouldn't help, and Ryou knew it, so he just stood still. A strong hit made the slim teen hit the kitchen cupboards across the floor. Again the boy was sobbing uncontrollably. It hurt so much. Bakura used the time to browse though the kitchen knives. Their shine was so beautiful on the moonlight; even more when stained in his hikari's blood. The yami picked one knife and used it to pin his ex- host's hands to the wall. The unfortunate teen shouted. Now he looked more helpless than ever. That made the enjoinment of the torture even more. When Bakura was through here Hell would definitely seem like a nice place to Ryou. The Thief King picked another knife- a stab here, a cut there. Soon his name was carved in the teen's flesh. Lovely. Ryou would definitely disagree with that. The pain was immeasurable, the boy had long run out of tears and his voice was a mare whisper. When the knife holding his hands was removed, the boy silently fell to the floor and remained motionless. Bakura stared emotionlessly at the teen at his feet. Has he had enough? No. Maybe a few more kicks would make the boy scream again- it was more fun that way. First kick- the boy shrunk closer in pain, second kick- a grave murmur of inhuman amount of pain, third kick- finally falling into peaceful painless darkness. This made Bakura's fury rise to a new level, until he figured the poor boy had passed out from blood loss and pain overdose. This made something in him clench. Had he gone too far this time? It's true, he beat the boy a lot, tortured him with nightmares, but never this badly. With just a few more slaps a few more gentle kicks the yami left, leaving poor Ryou like a broken, useless doll on the kitchen floor.
The next morning Ryou was woken up by the gentle touch of the light rays. He was so wounded he could barely stand on all fours. The teen slowly started crawling to the bathroom, until he bumped into the feet of his yami. Upon realising, what have just happened, the teen was already on his knees begging for forgiveness. When he wasn't hit the light was almost frantic, but he only received a cold order to go wash himself and cook breakfast. This gave the younger enough courage and by pure willpower he reached the bathroom to inspect the wounds and bondage them. These cuts would definitely leave a scar. Finally Ryou went down to cook, but Bakura didn't fail to notice the trembling form. Poor thing barely moved and his hand hurt at each touch. Still somehow he managed to cook the same fine breakfast as always and serve it with a smile to his master. Barely standing on his feet the light tried his very best without a single compliant. Bakura silently took the bow and that made him feel even worse. However after a few unsteady steps the light tripped. Bakura stood to just help him up, offering a hand, but the boy started apologising so dearly, shaking frantically. He was really broken and scared. The Thief King could not remember ever NOT being cruel to the kid, at least two hard beatings a week, nightmares every night and cruel remarks whenever possible. Now the light most probably thought he had done anything wrong and deserved a punishment. Instead of hitting him, Bakura only petted his head twice. Now the boy's eyes were wide beyond possible. He thought he would be swung to the nearest wall by his hair. After that he would most probably never stand up again. It did not happen. Now the teen was crying. The yami used all his patience to hold back his anger; after all, he had caused all this. "Hey, boy, I'm not gonna beat you now, so just stand up..." Bakura could not finish his order, because he noticed the big crimson circles reappearing on the boy's chest and hands. Oh, God, he is a lot worse than I thought... I really overdid myself this time... In one of the rare times the Thief King decided to be good/ kind and lifted the sobbing boy bridal style and carried him upstairs. The yami kicked the light's room open, just to realise there was no bed in it. He took it and unfortunately Ryou could not afford to buy a new one. Then Bakura rushed into his room and gently laid the younger. Now the boy wasn't crying anymore. Now two wide, watery chocolate orbs were starring back in surprise. "Whaa..." "Do not question me, Ryou! I can't have you die now." The response was cold, just like always, maybe even more. And with those words Bakura left, leaving the hikari with his pain all alone. The boy had never before entered his master's bedroom. He wasn't allowed to. However, now he was sitting in the middle of it. Looking around, he noticed a lot of black, gray, blue, really dark blue, some shades of green, a lot of objects- the room was a total mess. There were knives everywhere, different kinds of torture devices and gamed, surprisingly many golden jewellery and precious stones, which sparkled in the darkness. The room felt more like prison to Ryou, so despite the comfort of his old bed, the boy felt uneasy and for a first time in his life wished that Bakura would return soon.
Downstairs the said thief was having an inner debate with himself- weather he should just let Ryou be or help him a bit? It was plain truth that he had crossed the line this time and the mortal creature in his room above was suffering too much for his liking. Damn God, the kid wasn't even fighting back anymore- it was just taking all the blows and then continuing the routine with the same kind smile. Still he nearly bled to death last night and that wasn't in Bakura's plan. He wanted the teen alive. Not to mention he needed a bit of amusement and Ryou's constant crying and begging was getting annoying. Not to mention it brought a bit of guilt... I guess that was what it was. Poor boy so feared punishment now, that he was, well, let's say, overdoing it and considering each step a mistake. Ok, Bakura didn't want to leave the boy alone in his room for too long, so he took the two bows and brought them up. He found the boy in the position he had left him in. Good boy. Maybe he shouldn't beat him until his wounds heal. So now he handed him the bow and sat beside him. Again there was a gleam of surprise in the boy's eye. 'Come on, eat!', was all Bakura mumbled. Unlike him Ryou ate in small bits and pieces. And if only the Thief King knew how many questions ran through the teen's head, concerning his behaviour. After all, it caused a gleam of light to reappear in the hikari's eyes. After long moments of silence, Bakura again patted his light's head and said, 'I'll be out, so don't move around too much... I will know and I will punish you.' The teen nodded and then added, 'Thank you!' Even though, the yami stood and left without saying a thing, he was feeling a bit better. With this Bakura headed for the new bar, opening tonight.
All that time Ryou was lying on the bed, watching the ceiling. Soon, due to exhaustion and blood loss, the hikari fell asleep. When he woke up, it was already dark and there were loud noises. The door opened with a bang and a drunken Bakura entered. This petrified Ryou more than death itself. 'You know what, hikari, I promised myself I won't hit you this week, but I do not keep my promises... ever!' The chocolate eyes filled with fear. Nobody could have guessed it was humanly possible to do what followed to somebody so kind and innocent. If there ever was a God, where was he now to stop all this? Screams echoed through the entire house. Scrams of pain, beyond description. In addition, nobody knew that the body of this shy kid could take in so much without giving up. Nobody thought that with so many reopened wounds, so many new could be inflicted. The last thing Ryou remembered from that night was his yami gripping him roughly by his white hair and slamming his head hard against the wall, until he fell to the darkness. And there he thought his yami never beat him till unconsciousness... Blessed unconsciousness.
Next morning Ryou woke up in his room. This time he refused to stand, to go anywhere. His yami wasn't here and he hurt way too much to... move... not to cry. So the boy just hugged his knees with one hand, covered his head with the other and sobbing quietly.
Back in his room Bakura had finally woken up. After a few curses and the treatment of his headache, he remembered what happened last night. 'Fuck', he had really screwed up this time. He had just outdone himself. He went to his light's room and listened. Soft sobs... so quiet, so broken. God, poor kid! Physically- his condition must be really bad, but mentally- even worse. Bakura decided to knock on the door. A panicked scream was the only answer he got. No matter, he opened it. Inside was a heartbreaking sight. Ryou was sitting in the furthest from the entrance corner, covered in tears and blood. The teen was even paler than his hair, if that was possible. Bakura went closer to him, but the boy only jerked back into the wall, pure terror was the only thing evident in his eyes. The Thief King examined the damage he had caused. Bruises and cuts covered every inch of his body. Gods... There was no spot, where one could touch him without causing him pain. And for a first time Ryou spoke coherent, but choked and broken words. 'Why... why... why did you... I... I tried so hard... was...w-w-was I really that ... bad?' Now this made even Bakura flinch. He had made him suffer too much. Of course, he hadn't been bad. He had followed every order too perfectly. But now this toy was broken. Ryou was never going to be the same again. His own other half caused him too much misery. About the question, the yami could not give an appropriate answer. There probably was none. So he just stood up and left.
Now Bakura was getting sick of that. For the next 48 hours ha hadn't heard anything else but the weeping through their mind link. Ryou hadn't gone out of his room for two days straight- no eating, no sleeping- the boy was just crying. Well, yeah, it was his fault, but still... What made Bakura feel so bad was, that he wasn't in control of the situation and he had no way of influencing his hikari. The boy was so broken. He had only one thing left- his innocence. This was too important for the little one and even The King of Thieves couldn't bring himself to steal. Of course, he could have done it anytime, but that would most probably lead poor light to suicide. That wouldn't be good- who will cook and clean? Who will be there to be enslaved and beaten?
On the third day Ryou finally came down. He looked like a ruin, maybe even worse. He walked around like a shadow of his former self. No more cheerful smile, no more sill conversations. Only deafening silence. After lunch was served and eaten, the light picked up his books and sat in one corner, starting his homework. Now that was strange, why would he sit there and not on the table? Bakura finally but reluctantly decided to ask: '...Hey, kid, why are you sitting there?' 'Because three nights ago you ordered me to, you said I was a filthy dog and my life should be the same. While hitting my head against the wall, I think.' Bakura's pride wouldn't let him cancel the order, but still... Even though Ryou was pathetic, did he actually deserve this? Did his light actually deserve this? The problem remained unsolved.
The next two weeks went normally. The Thief King was making the greatest of efforts not to kill his hikari. For now he was succeeding. But the light was broken. That was something irreversible. To drawn his own sins, one of which was staring back at him all day, Bakura spent most of his time in pubs- drinking. Of course, Ryou was granting all of Bakura's wishes, obeying him irreversibly. However, there was something missing- the teen's warm, kind, innocent, loving, angelic smile. What saddened the yami most was losing this... smile. No matter how simple it sounded, this was the closest thing to an angelic gift the darker had actually received. And he had broken it. It sounded even simpler. Fuck. It wasn't that simple. Such thoughts brought beer after beer, rough alcohol and... , well, even rougher alcohol. Many hours passed when the thief decided to finally head home. There Ryou had emotionlessly came back after school, cooked and ate dinner, did his homework , took a shower and currently drying his long white mane. Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door. A drunken yami was coming back. Unfortunately, the older was more intoxicated than ever, maybe even beyond humanly possible. Well, he wasn't human, after all. Not before opening the door with a silent greeting did the hikari go back to his own business. The demon sat on the couch, and after a while Ryou heard his name being called. He knew it was better to attend immediately. 'Ex- landlord,' came Bakura's mocking voice, 'why don't you smile anymore?' At first the question startled Ryou, but then he decided to answer honestly. 'Because I thought that it could bring out you good side. However, master, you do not have a good side. You just want me hurt and bleeding. Hurt people do not smile. After your recent actions, I do not smile anymore, as well.' How hardly mistaken and how bitterly right he was. He shouldn't have said it. His yami was out of his mind and these words really made him lose it. 'Oh, I will show you hurt!' The older one hissed. 'After tonight you will know true pain!' Nothing could measure the amount of pain that spread through the boy's body. No screaming or begging could get through to his yami now. Bakura pulled the boy by his hair to the second floor then threw him on the ground. Another chocked sob. 'Please. I didn't mean it, please... please... I beg you... please...' Instead the boy's hands were again pinned to the floor by a sharp knife. Just a long scream this time. Then, suddenly, the hikari felt the yami's hands softly stroking his sides. 'Whaa..?' But then the painful realization came. He wasn't going to get through tonight without... The boy couldn't finish it, because Bakura's lips were bruising the teens. The yami bit hard on the soft lips, making the lower bleed, and exploring roughly. Eager hands tore away Ryou's shirt, a smaller knife cut his jeans. Now the hikari's begs were heartbreaking. He hated every second of it. 'Please, (sob) master, (sob), I will do better (sob), please... Just not this (sob)... Not this (sob) ... please... please...' In vain. There was no stopping Bakura now. The rest was only pain and blood. No preparation, no kind words or kisses, no gentle creases or hugs ...no bed, just the cold floor and the feeling of being thorn in two, slowly, painfully. Finally, it was over. With that Ryou finally broke... He just pulled up what was left of his jeans and shirt, curled up in a U-shape on the floor and cried. So quietly, so desperately.
Bakura had already left.
Finally, the next morning came. The thief woke up and tried to remember... What happened yesterday? ... Oh, Gods... Now that was bad, really screwed up... In the next room, a boy, curled up was asking himself the same questions all night and couldn't find the answers. Why? Why did he do it? The only thing I asked him not to! The only thing I begged him not to! This couldn't be a punishment, because no real punishment or torture was that rough. No. What so much wrong could he have possibly done? What? But there was no answer for him.
Bakura slowly made his way to the other's bedroom and knocked. No answer. Still, he opened the door. The boy was lying on the rugs he called a bed now. He wasn't crying, just starring at the wall with a waterfall of tears streaming down his face. Bakura, well, let's say he felt a bit sad. That was supposed to be his other good side, he was supposed to protect. And that hikari only asked one thing of him. One. Despite the boy's respect for all the yami's wishes and preferences and orders, he just asked to keep one thing to be still sane. And he took it carelessly and left him with all that sorrow, without even one gentle kiss to soothe the pain. The yami kneeled down close to the boy and tried to gently stroke his hair. It was messy and bloody. The small figure beneath him shook violently. What followed was the hikari's most cracked voice, Bakura had ever heard. 'If you're going to do it again, give it a go. Do not bother to be gentle; you can't cause me anymore pain than you already did. You were right. After this night, I know what true pain feels like...' In every gesture and word, there was betrayal and hurt. Bakura looked down, suppressing the need to cry and ask forgiveness. In his gentlest voice he said, 'No, little Ryou, I do not feel like screwing you now... and... and... I do not wish to see you.' The last bit came out cracked. But the spirit had already stood and going for the door. Emotionless bastard. That was what the light would have said. It would have been true though, or would it? Maybe, just maybe, one tear rolled down those psychotic eyes. Maybe, it was imagination.
Four days have passed and there was still no sign from Ryou. Not once had the Yami seen him. Beer after beer disappeared from the fridge. There was no more warm breakfast, no more kind smiles, no more Ryou. However, Bakura just couldn't bring himself to knock on that door and face his own sin. It was Saturday morning when he finally found himself at that fatal place. Luckily, the Light was inside but his condition was getting worse and worse by the hour. At least he had moved a bit. Now the younger was sitting in a corner, hugging his knees and biting the bottom lip. He hadn't eaten anything in four straight days, the yami assumed, not to mention beaten, sliced and raped. Bakura went to his hikari and kneeled down in front of him. Ryou immediately hid his face in his knees, burying it beneath a long white mane. 'Ryou, why are you doing this?' Bakura managed to utter, while putting his hands on the sides of the fragile form. 'You told me not to show up in front of you.' The answer was a muffled cry. 'So, ... you just stayed in your room weeping for four straight days. I started to worry.' A really small part of the Thief actually felt relief, but he still felt like a looser bullying a child. Well, he actually was just that. 'No.' Ryou simply interrupted his thoughts. 'I took showers and ate a bit at night. I cleaned and bought food while you were gone, but I didn't have time to cook.' Bakura was Ryou's world. Apparently, that was pretty much it. However, this world was a psychotic ruin. 'Light, do you cut yourself?' The question came out as a surprise to both of them, but it was something that was really bothering the yami. The look of petrified eyes came starring back. No, please, not another beating or a rape, please, please, God, I cannot take it, not a second more... No one was there to answer Ryou's plea to the Gods. Bakura failed to wait for a proper response from the boy and just rolled up his loose sleeves to reveal traces of tiny cuts. 'Master, please...' 'Shut up with your pathetic pleading!' A hiss followed with a loud slap across the face. The poor light was crawling on the floor, while being kicked harshly over and over, until he spat out blood. 'That must teach you that I am the only one, who can cause you pain and cut you. I decide your life!' With that Bakura left once again, leaving Ryou all alone with his misery. The hikari had become the broken and bleeding doll of a merciless master. Was there no redemption for him?
Downstairs Bakura was having a beer, thinking. Why was that stupid child cutting himself now? Bakura could surely make his life a lot more miserable. If he wanted to. He could... he could... The Thief King couldn't think of any kind of torture he hadn't already tried out with the boy in the last two years. The poor thing took it all in without ever spilling a word to anyone. He decided to go up there, comfort his hikari and control his temper this time. When he walked inside the light's room, he found the boy starring back in fear with a knife, pointed to his throat. 'Ryou, put that down. You can hurt yourself!' The order sounded more like a plea. But Ryou had no intention of obeying this time. 'I am sorry, dear Yami, but this is my Christmas present for you!' The boy tried to slice through the soft skin, but the older was faster and stronger. In a split second the weapon was lying away on the ground. Trying his hardest not to beat him senseless again, The Thief King put his hands around the boy. The hikari was gently and repeatedly sobbing, 'No, no, no, no...' 'Ryou, I believe we have to make some reforms ...' Bakura looked around. The sobbing teen was still holding him firmly, like a drowner holds to a treat. 'Ok, so... first of all, I forbid you to harm yourself. Then you can... well...you can share the bed with me. And I ... I will give you an extra free hour after school...' Silence. Deafening silence. Two wide eyes were staring back at him. 'Yodonoushi, ... just, please, don't hurt yourself, okay?' 'B-b-but, yami,... I...' The fragile boy was still holding the other, refusing to let go. 'I may give you hell, Ryou, but I don't want you dead, got it?'You want me to suffer...' 'Ouuu, just dress up and come down. I've cooked lunch.'
About fifteen minutes later Ryou's quiet and careful steps were heard. The boy was holding something behind his back. He ran to his dark and gave him the simply- wrapped present. Then ran into the living room to hide. There was a small Marry Christmas card. Bakura unwrapped the ribbon. I treat him like a dog and he buys me a Christmas present. Inside the box there was a beautiful dagger, a perfect replica of the one he used to posses back in Ancient Egypt. And he hadn't bought him anything. He sure could be awful at times. His storming out made Ryou hide under the table. After about an hour, the Thief returned, only to find his host, hiding miserably behind the draperies. Bakura couldn't suppress his laugh. 'Hey, I can see you...' The boy went out and kneeled crying, 'Please, don't kill me! I didn't mean to offend you... I ...just...' The yami just stroked his hair and gave him a small box. 'Mary Christmas.' Silence. It seemed as if Ryou was still digesting the situation. Finally, his trembling hands took the present. 'Thank you, Bakura!' 'Come on, open it.' Inside was a lovely pendant, small and silver. It lacked a particular shape, but it represented an asymmetric snowflake. It was then, when Ryou gave Bakura the most thankful hug ever! 'Marry Christmas, yami.' This time there was a response. 'Marry Christmas, Ryou.' The kind smile grew back on the light's lips. Bakura had longed so much to see this simple gesture.
That day after dinner, Bakura really took Ryou to sleep with him. The child was really distressed at first, because of the memories he had of being so close to his yami. Something he didn't want to remember. But when Bakura wrapped his arms around the smaller teen, he calmed down and soon fell asleep. Sleeping on the bed was a lot more comfortable than being on the rags. A few moments before he fell asleep, he noticed that the dagger, he had given his yami, was hanging on the wall. It shone really pretty.
The next month went really smoothly. Actually, Bakura hadn't beaten Ryou, nor tortured him- that definitely was new to both of them. But the damage on Ryou's mental condition was irreversible, and no wonder lasts forever. The more Bakura kept himself from beating his hikari, the more he drank and this made him more violent than anything. Even though, the light followed the orders strictly and without fail, he was still human. Human beings tend to make mistakes, usually at the worst possible moment.
It was the middle of the night, when Bakura woke Ryou up with a drunken stumble. The younger rushed down to see his yami throwing his coat and sitting on the sofa. He called the teen to sit next to him. The question that followed took the boy by surprise, 'Do you love me, Ryou?' The hikari panicked, not knowing how to answer. Of course, he loved Bakura more than anything, but what kind of question was that. Coming from a drunken yami, it could only mean something bad. Lost in his thoughts, Ryou only starred back into his older mirror image, unable to utter a word. 'Dear hikari, if you don't answer, I will take your silence as a 'no'.' 'I...I...I...I...' But Ryou's whisper came out too quietly for Bakura to hear. Rage filled the Thief King's eyes. If only Ryou had said something, anything. If only he could have predicted what the yami would do to him, for remaining silent. The hits and kicks the teen bared that night were the roughest until now. And as if this much pain wasn't enough! There wasn't an inch of his body, left unhurt. Not even a real scream could pass through those swollen lips, only squirms of terror and pain. When Bakura finally grew tired of the beating, he kneeled down and whispered in his hikari's year, venom poisoning his words. 'If you don't want to love me willingly, I will take my love forcefully!' even the coldest heart and the most unfazed gaze would have turned away at this sight. This unfortunate boy, bullied to the verge of his powers and sanity, trying to crawl away, but being dragged back on all fours, mouth shuttered to muffle the screams and raped in the most brutal manner. When the Thief King was finally done, he just stood up and left. As always.
It was 4 a.m. Four hours of Ryou's 18-th b-day have passed. Happy Birthday!
The next morning the yami woke up with another terrible headache. He decided to go down to the kitchen to get some medicine, only to find the trembling form of his light, trying to cook. The poor thing shook so violently, it was a whole wonder, he was standing up. He walked over to the teen. When the younger noticed him, he couldn't help the tears and sobs anymore. The kid was at his feet, pleading and begging. But his words were too distorted by the tears; the Thief King could barely understand him. Finally, he noticed the bloodied white T- shirt, the torn jeans, and the bruises over the arms and legs. Had he done that? He kneeled down to the light and tried to soothe him. As his hands reached the skinny back of the buy, it leapt up. 'Please...don't...please...please...please...' What Bakura saw in those eyes was unexplainable. What had he done last night? Something unforgivable. He had sworn to himself never to rape Ryou again, never again. The teen could not handle it- mentally. But now it seemed like he had both beaten him and raped him. His light must be on the verge of insanity.
'Ryou...' I started. He clutched me even tighter and his pleas became even more intense. I felt like the entire universe came crushing over me. I had gone too far...too far. The kid was paying for it- dearly. I was trying as gently as I could to stroke his messy hair, to cuddle him, but my light seemed to flinch every time. There was no unwound place on his skin. Only his face seemed whole. I lifted his chin to meet his teary eyes, which made me sink down in my own ocean of guilt. I asked him whether he wanted to go back to his room. He looked startled at the lack of pain, but nodded. I helped him up and watched him make his exit. Surely, he did not wish to see me right now.
Upstairs, Ryou went to the bedroom and locked the door, fearing his yami's wrath too much. No matter how hard he tried, how much he pleaded, Bakura wanted him dead. Why? When he loved him so much...
Downstairs, the Thief King sat completely dumb folded, drowning in self- hatred. Finally, he had noticed the date- Ryou's birthday. Ryou's 18-th birthday. Not even as a spiteful spirit in the Millennium Ring had he done such cruel stuff. How the kid had managed to hold on for so long remained a complete mystery. He had to go up, he had to comfort him. He had to change. He couldn't. Slowly, he started climbing the stairs to the bedroom door. Locked. He picked it too easily, only to stare in horror. The fragile form of his light was curled next to one wall. A bloody pool surrounded it. It leaked from the many small cuts on the arms. The eyes were peacefully closed. A dagger lied close to him. The same one, he gave Bakura for Christmas. On the bed lied a note, the demon failed to notice. He rushed to his other half. Covered the wounds, managed to stop the bleeding, called an ambulance.
The paramedics arrived, took the body from the yami's numb hands and left. The older was all alone in a bloody room, forsakening himself. He was sitting on the bed, when he noticed the folded piece of paper with his name on it.
'Last night you asked me if I loved you. I do. You are my life. But it seems like you hate me, you do not want me close to you. You beat me, rape me, abuse me in every single way, known and unknown to humanity. I still love you. My heart just can't take it anymore. I am so sorry, Bakura. I was never good enough for you. Please, live a happy life for me. Please, remember that I love you!
Ryou'
His handwriting was shaky. Now, it felt like Bakura was the one, who drove the dagger through his arms. Now, it was all over. There was no more Ryou. The doctors said that he was in a really deep coma. Too much blood loss. It was a clinical death, maybe. They doubted he'll ever wake up. Every day the Thief King came to see him, every day he apologised , begged him to just wake up... told him how much he missed him and how much he loved him. The yami never gave up on his other half and kept on his daily visits, spending there hours, crying as much as his hikari used to while begging him for mercy...
