Hey all. I'm new at this so im up for constructive criticism.Mainly though, I want to know what you think about chapter one. and for those of you who think the will be too sad, just stick in there, you never know where it will go...
Enjoy.
Chapter One: Premonition
Thud.
Time stoped, the soft pitter patter of the rain fell all around him, but it didn't matter, he didn't hear it. He ran to her body, it was so light. she felt like a limp statue and her fur was slightly ruffled in a few spots but he didn't care. She was so beautiful. So many things he wanted to tell her, he wanted to say, he wanted to do. That morning he was sure their life would be long together, he even thought they would have a few kids. How could he have been so stupid.
Another man traipsed up beside him, saying something.
How could I have been so stupid. how could I have been so wrong. He thought. We were so carful, it was planned so well. i thought it was fool proof, is that where I went wrong? So many questions, so few answers except for the one cruel truth in his now trembling hands. He stroked the beautiful blue fur on her petit muzzel. A single tear leanded on her forehead.
The man next to him now placed a hand on his sholder.
Is this how it was fated?
The man shook him a little. Fox's body began to convulse as tears started to stream down his eyes. First his mother, than his father, and now her. A pitiful primal noise errupted from his throught as he fell over the body of his love. How could it end like this? One hand petted her fur and worked its way over to the wound in her cest. The blaster shot cauterize the hole it had put in her instanly. Now he truely wept for Krystal. Then it snapped. All the emotion from all the men that his nemesis had killed, all the women and children he destroyed. His father. His Mather. Krystal. The sarrow in him changed to a pure furry and raged so perfectly focused at his target that the emotion itrself became a perfectly sharpend blade that coult cut anything. He lunged, sworn to avenge everything. As he flew at his taget, one thought flew through his mind before it was replaced blood lust.
Only if I had...