Authors Note: The ladies of the TE decided to have another go at a Pass It On style fic. Now those of you who have read that charming delight will be aware that it was written by several authors who posted a sentence at a time on the forum to create the one fic. This time remuslives, KaraSays, Jack of the North, WeasleyForMe, Grande Vanilla Skim Latte, Book Mad TJ, Mistymist, marauder-xx, oOoJadedoOo and Jazz E. Roisin all participated and here is the result. Somehow not even the most corrupt of us saw it quite turning out like this.

A Night on the Town

One

Hermione turned sideways in the mirror to examine herself. She shoved her bushy hair behind an ear so she could better see. The dress Ginny loaned her hung loosely across her flat chest and squeezed her chubby middle too tightly. She sighed as she looked down to the legs she hadn't had a chance to shave yet, maybe George wouldn't notice.

She was also concerned that her enormous hair would fall into their food while they were eating, but hair charms didn't work for her.

Hermione had been completely infatuated with George ever since she noticed how unattractively fat and lazy Ron had become after Voldemort was killed. Plus, Ron's penis was so small, she had begun to call him "tic tac" behind his back.

She chuckled at the thought of Ron's itty bitty weeny and hoped it wasn't a family trait. She turned sideways once more and sucked in her stomach. "Not too bad," she said to her reflection. She could only hope George took her somewhere where she could hide her belly underneath the table. There was no way she could hold it in through the whole meal.

Hermione checked herself over once more in the mirror before nodding to herself and walking out of her dingy apartment. 'I look fine, but god I've gained a little weight since the fall of Voldemort, and my hair is so crazy!'

She was halfway to the burrow where she was meeting George, when she remembered something "Shit! Shit! Fuck, I forgot the condoms George told me to bring!"

Running a frustrated hand through her unruly hair she spun in circle three times trying to think what to do before coming to a stop. Pulling her wand out from between her breasts (a place she was sure Mad eye would have had a heart attack over) she cast a quick contraceptive charm and hoped the Weasley Twin wasn't carrying anything more than a stiff arousal.

Finally, she arrived at the Burrow. She attempted to smooth her wild curls one last time and knocked on the door.

"Yeah, come on in." A voice called from the other side. She let herself in and saw Fred sitting in a chair, with his feet on the table.

Their parent's were out celebrating their anniversary. She took in his scrawny frame wearing what appeared to be Ginny's shirt and a pair of short shorts.

"He's in there." Fred pointed over his shoulder.

Hermione followed the bony finger to a small room where George squatted in a dingy pair of tighty-whiteys. He appeared to be sniffing the dirty clothes, looking for something that didn't smell too pungent.

"Don't you have a kick the pile system?" She asked, trying not to laugh at the sight.

"A what?" he asked startled, falling to his side in the pile of clothing.

"You know, everything in one pile on the floor, you just kick and see what comes to the top ... at least that's what I do," she shrugged.

"Hey change of plans, I'm not gonna get dressed up all fancy for dinner, so why don't we just stay here?" George said rubbing his dirty face.

"Uh, umm" Hermione said not really sure what to say.

"I'll cook here" George said before letting out a fart.

"No way in hell" Hermione looked over to Fred, he looked a little better, but not by much "Fred wanna go out?"

"Sure," Fred said, launching to his feet. He was wearing long grey thermal underwear and no shirt to cover his bony chest. She could count the ribs poking out from his stomach, the clothes he was wearing when she entered were in a pile by the door.

"Toss me a shirt George." George tossed him a blue shirt with a large grass stain on the back.

"You're paying, right?" he asked.

"You boys wouldn't shout if a hippogriff bit you so of course I'll be paying, but we'll have to go somewhere cheap because I spent most of my pay cheque on the latest Cedric Diggory biography" Hermione told him.

"I don't care lets just go" Fred replied not even listening to her while he cleaned his ear out with his wand tip.

Hermione smile at him and headed for the door.