It was a hot summer in San Antonio, Texas, so naturally Megan decided that it was wisest to stay indoors where it didn't feel like a blazing inferno. It was 8:00 on a Friday morning and she had gone to sleep at 2 AM, so she was understandably groggy as she shuffled about doing her daily chores. She went downstairs carrying a load of laundry and saw that her mother had left a message on the answering machine.

"Hey, Megan, remember to clean up, do the laundry, and put the dishes in the microwave—er—dishwasher, I mean. Well, we're doing good here in Corpus, just call us if you need anything!"

Megan made a face at the answering machine and muttered an "I know!" She turned to put the basket of laundry on the washer when her fluffy black cat Garry decided to randomly plop down in her path while she was crossing the kitchen floor and send the basket of laundry and her one hundred and plus pounds crashing to the floor. After making sure that nothing was broken, she turned to glare at Garry, who looked back at her innocently.

"You. Suck. Other. Male. Cats." Garry got up and scurried over to his food bowl.

"Meow?"

"No." She heaved herself up and started gathering the laundry that was scattered on the kitchen floor. After sorting it and putting a load in the washer, she decided that the house was too quiet and went over to her laptop computer to start up Limewire. Soon she was jamming to Aerosmith's and Run DMC's "Walk this way," as she washed the dishes. In the middle of the song Garry and her other female tortoiseshell cat, Ning-ning decided to start running full speed around the house like they were high on catnip. She rolled her eyes and ignored them until she heard a few crashes and something heavy falling down the stairs. Megan gasped and abandoned the dishes to go see what was wrong.

"CATS!" she yelled, ready to whip some feline butt if they had broken anything. She rounded the corner to the stairwell and froze in fear. At the bottom of the stairs lay a man wearing a dirty old fashioned uniform who appeared to be unconscious. Carefully, she knelt down next to him and began to feel for a pulse. She fell over backwards, staring at the man in horror. "OH MY GOD, THERE'S A DEAD GUY IN MY HOUSE!"

"Oh, this is your house? Sorry about that, love." Megan nearly had a heart attack when she saw who was descending the stairs. The man paused and looked up, frowning, and then fixed her with a curious stare. "Am I in Singapore?"

Megan fainted.

Jack saw the girl's eyes roll back into her head before she fell over near to where Beckett lay.

"Oh, well that's just peachy." Jack looked around at the lavishly decorated Oriental-looking room and then went around the corner where the kitchen was. He shrugged to himself and filled a rather large glass with water from the sink, and then went back and splashed it on Beckett and the girl. The girl woke immediately, gasping and sitting up while Beckett clutched his head and groaned, remaining where he was on the floor. The girl stood and backed away from them.

"Who the hell are you people?" she demanded.

"I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, love." She glared at Jack suspiciously, and then Beckett spoke up. Or yelled, rather.

"MR. MERCER! Come seize this scoundrel and then fetch me some ice for my head!" Jack and the girl gawked at him. The girl disappeared into the kitchen and Jack followed, wanting to look around more.

"Interesting place you've got here—oh bugger." Jack was staring at the end of a very thick and very pointy butcher's knife. The girl glared at him.

"I'm giving you and your friend two minutes to get out of my house, or I'm going Kung Pow on you." Jack thought for a moment.

"Just one question: am I in China or Singapore?" Jack asked.

"You're in Texas, now GET OUT!" The girl brandished the tip of the knife closer to him. Jack backed up.

"Hold on—Texas? Where the bloody hell is that? Russia? Mongolia?" The girl looked at him like he was an idiot. "Now, love, I'm sorry to have scared you, but at the moment I have no bloody idea where I am, so stabbing me still won't do anything to solve the problem of finding out where we bloody are! Savvy?" The girl slowly lowered her weapon, but she still looked suspicious.

"How'd you get in here?" she asked.

"Well, I had just got into an argument with Lord Beckett and we were having a bit of a tussle over me compass. All of a sudden, we lost our footing and there was a flash of light. Next thing I knew, I'm looking at a fluffy little beastie running past me and Beckett's tumbling down the stairs." After he was finished telling his story, he leaned against the counter and watched the girl process what she just heard.

"Oh my gosh," she said. "This is just like a fanfic!" She put the knife down much to Jack's relief and then went over to him. She grabbed his right arm and pulled the sleeve up. Sure enough, there was the P brand and the sparrow tattoo. She gaped at him.

"See something you like, love?" he said, showing his gold teeth in a grin.

"You're Jack Sparrow. And that dude lying down is Cutler Beckett." The girl looked like she was about to faint again.

"Captain Jack Sparrow, love."

"I believe it's LORD Beckett, madam."

Lord Cutler Beckett was furious to discover that he was lying on the floor with a throbbing head and Mr. Mercer was nowhere to be seen. He had finally gotten up and saw that he was no longer in his office, nor anywhere remotely close to his office. He walked around the corner to where there were voices and saw Jack Sparrow conversing with a brown-haired Asian-looking girl. He heard her say his name, albeit incorrectly.

"I believe it's LORD Beckett, madam," he said. The other two turned to look at him. The girl slowly approached him until they were eye to eye and then placed her hand above her head and extended it out to above his.

"The rumors are true, then," the girl said, smirking. "You are rather short."

"I beg your pardon!" Beckett said furiously. How dare this girl! Who did she think she is?

"I'm not taking this anymore!" he yelled. "I'm leaving!" He marched towards where the glass sliding door was in the kitchen and ran smack into it. He rubbed his forehead where it had hit the glass and then turned and glared at the other two, who were trying to hide their laughter. "Oh, very funny!"

"Okay, that was funny as hell, I've got to admit," said the girl. "But why don't we all just sit down, have a drink and sort this all out?"

"Please do," said Cutler grumpily.

Megan cleared off the small round breakfast table in the kitchen and set down three glasses of iced tea. Beckett and Jack took the seats farthest from each other and Megan sat in the middle.

"Right," she said, glancing at them both. Jack had taken a sip of his glass and made a disgusted look while Beckett remained stoic but took a well-sized gulp. "First thing's first. My name is Megan, this is my parent's house and mine…and we are presently located in America. Not to mention that the year is now 2007." She sat back and let it all sink in. Just then, the phone rang, startling both Jack and Beckett. Megan got up calmly and answered it.

"Hello?"

"JESUS WAS IN MY CLOSET!" She cringed and held the receiver a foot away from her ear. Jack and Beckett stared, and Megan was pretty sure that they had clearly heard what was said.

"Tawny?" she said tentatively. "Are you okay?"

"NO, I'M NOT OKAY, I OPENED UP MY CLOSET EXPECTING TO SEE CLOTHES, AND INSTEAD I SAW JESUS!"

"Tawny, calm down. So where is Jesus now?" asked a bewildered Megan, putting it on speakerphone. Unfortunately, it just made Tawny's voice louder.

"I didn't know what to do, he was just right there and I almost wet myself, so I grabbed my lamp and hit him on the head! HE'S NOT MOVING!" It was Megan's turn to yell.

"WHAT THE HELL, TAWNY! YOU ATTACKED JESUS?! WHAT IF THIS IS JUDGEMENT DAY, TAWNY?! YOU'RE GOING TO HELL FOR ATTACKING JESUS!" A sob came from the other end of the phone.

"I know! And I don't think my being bisexual will help much!" wailed Tawny. Beckett's eyes widened and Jack smirked.

"Okay, Tawny? Just—make sure Jesus doesn't get away and I'll come over to your house, I guess. Um, but I'm bringing some people, too, and don't freak when you answer the door."

"But what are we gonna do?" asked Tawny frantically.

"I-I-I guess we c-can explain to Jesus why you attacked him and get it all cleared up," replied Megan, getting to be freaked out. She heard a bang from Tawny's end. "What was that?!"

"It was coming from the ceiling!" said Tawny. "OH, GREAT, DON'T TELL ME SATAN IS IN MY ATTIC!"

"Tawny, hold on! I'm heading over there right now!" Megan hung up and grabbed her keys and purse from the kitchen counter. She looked at the two Pirates of the Caribbean characters. "Follow me." The men exchanged looks with one another and then trailed Megan through the living room and out the front door to her car. She opened both passenger side doors and said, "Get in."

"There are so many houses here!" observed Beckett. Megan grabbed him and pushed him down into the backseat. Jack got into the front passenger seat while she buckled Beckett's seat belt and then she did his. She closed their doors and then went around to the driver's side and got in.

"It's positively sweltering in here!" Beckett complained. Megan rolled her eyes and started up the car. Cool air drifted in through the vents and Jack put his face right up against one with his mouth wide open.

"Don't do that." Jack gave her a look, but sat back in his chair. As soon as she backed out of the driveway, they were off.

Tawny had sat against her front door chewing her nails nervously and was relieved when the doorbell rang. She opened it to see Megan standing beside Jack Sparrow and Cutler Beckett. She stared for a moment and then offered her arm to Jack.

"Pinch me, please." Jack obliged rather willingly. "Ow! Damn." She stepped aside to let them in. "Let's talk to Jesus first and see if he can get rid of Satan."

"Are you sure that—?" Megan started to say, but there was a loud banging noise that came from above them along with a scream. "Um…yeah, I'd say you have hell in your attic."

"Ya think?" Tawny snapped. She led them into her room where she had tied the closet handles together and pushed a small bookshelf in front of it. The other three gawked at the sight.

"Geez, did you have to barricade him in like that?" remarked Megan. Tawny ignored her and pushed the bookshelf away before untying the handles and opening the closet. A look of recognition sparked on both Jack and Beckett's faces at the sight of the man with long brown hair.

"Sorry to tell you this, love, but that man is a far cry from Jesus," said Jack. Beckett grabbed a random glass of water off of Tawny's dresser and splashed it on the man. The man opened his eyes and gazed at them.

"Funny that we meet again, Norrington," said Beckett.

"NORRINGTON?!" spat Tawny and Megan. Norrington glared Tawny suspiciously.

"You attacked me," he growled.

"Sorry," said Tawny. "But if you're not Jesus and you're in my closet, then who the hell is in my attic?" She stormed out of her room followed by Megan and the Pirates gang and went down the hall over to where a random piece of rope hung down from the ceiling and pulled on it. A figure tumbled down the revealed attic staircase with a squeak.

Elizabeth Swann looked up at them, a look of utter confusion etched upon her face. An evil grin spread across Tawny's face as she helped her up.

"Why couldn't you have popped into my closet instead?" Everyone turned to look strangely at Tawny.

"Where am I?" asked Elizabeth, gazing around at Tawny's small one story house.

"That's what I would like to know," said Norrington.

"Apparently, we seem to have been transported to the American colonies in the future," said Beckett, looking totally bored. Tawny raised an eyebrow.

"Is Ashton Kutcher starting a Punk'd series for normal people?" she asked.

Everyone in the room, including Megan, gawked at her, for they did not watch MTV.

"Ookay," she said. "Maybe not, then. Anyway, we should really start to tell them where they are."

"Please do," said Norrington, plopping down onto a sofa. Tawny squealed and shooed him out of it.

"Get off my clean furniture, you dirty Jesus look-a-like!"

"Unhand me, you scantily clad scarlet woman!" Norrington pulled his arm away from her.

"Oh yeah? Well…you…you…" Tawny ran out of ideas for what to call him and just glared.

"Okay!" Megan stepped in between them. "How's about we stop fighting, and sit down and discuss this whole situation?"

"Sounds good to me," Norrington said. "If only that woman would allow me to sit!" Megan sighed.

"Tawny, let the man sit on a lawn chair, for goodness' sake!"

"Fine!" Tawny went out onto the porch and retrieved the flimsiest plastic chair she could find and set it in front of Norrington.

"Thank you, madam." Tawny merely sat in the loveseat beside Elizabeth and smirked. Megan sat in between Beckett and Jack on the sofa. Norrington sighed and settled himself into the uncomfortable lawn chair.

"Okay," said Tawny. "Well, my name is Tawny Martinez and I'm twenty years old…and I don't know what else to say, so I'm gonna hand it over to Megan." Megan rolled her eyes.

"My name is Megan and I'm eighteen years old. I know you've been wondering why we know your names, but that's because your stories are legendary." All of the Pirates characters exchanged pleased looks. "Somehow all of you have been transported into the future to the year 2007. Not to mention you showed up in random places."

"Norrington came out of the closet," giggled Tawny. Norrington just looked confused. Megan hid her face in her hands trying to hide her laughter as the Pirates crew blinked dumbly.

"What is this place called?" asked Elizabeth.

"Like Beckett said earlier, we're in a country that was once the American colonies," said Tawny. "Eventually the colonies broke away from Britain and became its own country. Today we call it the United States of America and it consists of fifty states. The one that we're located in right now is called Texas."

"Why did only us four get transported?" asked Jack, gesturing to himself and the other fictional characters. "Where's me crew? Where's the Pearl?"

"I don't think we can answer that," said Megan. She looked around at all of the Pirates characters and noticed how out of place they looked. "What we need to do is find a way to settle you guys in and get clothes and stuff."

"Wal-Mart?"

"Wal-Mart."

To be continued…

Please tell me what you think! Is the insanity too insane? Is it boring? Confusing? Delicious?

Erm...scratch delicious. I was thinking of cake!