Citadel
I'm sitting on a citadel,
Contemplating' life,
Makin' a point to waste my time,
I'm walkin on clouds,
Of white…
Ginny Weasly sighed. She was sitting in her room at the burrow doing her summer home work. Well, actually, she was day dreaming, staring out her window, and thinking about nothing, and everything, and some other things in between. The clouds in the very blue sky looked like huge cotton balls, and a warm peaceful summer breeze played in her flaming red hair. But most of her thoughts were anything but peaceful. Although she was looking forward to her return to school, she had some trouble imagining what Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry would be like without it headmaster. Not that she didn't think that professor McGonagall wouldn't do a good job as headmistress, she did. She just wasn't sure how Hogwarts could go on without Dumbledore. "And why did he have to die anyway?" She thought angrily, staring at the sky again. "Why does everything have to be so unfair?" The casualties of the war had been far too high. Dumbledore was just one name on a long list that included Sirius black, and many others. And that was just the recent deaths. There had been murders before, and these included Neville Longbottom's parents. And Harry's. Ginny shook herself. It wouldn't do to think too much about Harry now.
What if I fall?
What if I don't?
What if I never make it home?
What if I bleed?
What if I break?
And I find that I can't take,
The city bellow the citadel,
Holding my own hand? ...
Ginny stood up, and walked out of her room and into the hall, trying not to picture Harry too clearly. The only image that came to mind when she thought of him was his face the last time they had talked, as he told her they couldn't be together, and it wasn't healthy to dwell on that too much.
Ginny walked quickly down the stairs to the kitchen, determined to banish all thoughts of Harry Potter once and for all. "Anything I can do to help with dinner, mum?"
"Oh, of course Ginny dear, thank you so much for asking!" Molly Weasley replied brightly. She gave Ginny a knowing look, and handed her a bowl, and a spoon.
"Stir that for me, please dear. We have guests coming tonight, did I tell you?"
"No! Who's coming?" Ginny asked, her voice rising in excitement. "Are bill and Charlie coming? And Fred and George?"
"Among others, yes." Molly turned her back to hide her amusement at her daughter's reaction. She was tempted to tell Ginny about a certain black haired, green eyed boy, who would also be making an appearance tonight, but thought better of it. Ginny had been very unhappy with Harry Potter recently and molly could only guess that it was Harry's own fault. But he deserved a chance to get her back…
And I'm breaking on the balcony,
Breaking window panes,
Killing the pain of broken hearts,
And I'm walking on clouds,
Walking on stars…
The Weasley family had always been loud, but there was nothing like the noise caused by putting them all in the same room. The conversations were all very interesting, but Ginny was having trouble concentrating on what she was saying to Hermione, who had come with Ron, earlier that evening. "…and so they were talking about how the O.W.L.s don't really get studied for quite hard enough, though it seems that the people who are studying things like arithmancy, and ancient runes do better than the people who don't take either. I wonder why that is?"
"I really haven't a clue Hermione. Why don't you ask Bill though? He's bound to know." Ginny replied.
"Oh good idea, if you don't mind, I think I shall." With that Hermione was standing up, and turning so that she was facing Bill. Ginny got up too, and walked into the kitchen to see if she could do anything for her mother. Molly Weasley was bustling about, bossing her husband and the twins around, making them serve dinner for her. "Oh good, now Ginny's here," said Fred.
"We'll just slip back out to the guests, shall we?" Finished George. Well, some things never change, thought Ginny with a grin. As a child she had often been the one who was forced to help her mother with things like serving meals. "Now Fred, George…" molly began, looking stormy eyed at the twins. "Oh no mum, let them go, I'll help." Ginny put in quickly. "Besides mum, I think I heard someone open the door a few minutes back." Said George, while Fred merely grinned widely.
"Oh, in that case, you know what to do boys. Ginny! Can you take this into the dinning room please?" Asked Mrs. Weasley, handing Ginny a large bowl of mashed potatoes and making shooing motions with her hands.
"Alright." Ginny sighed, and headed for the dinning room, eager to be free to the extremely heavy potatoes.
"…yeah, the match was brilliant! I can't believe I almost didn't go!" Oh no. the new voice in the dinning room was very familiar. Ginny stood in front to the door to the dinning room, torn between her wish to rid herself of the bowl, and her wish to avoid speaking to Harry Potter, at all costs. In the end, I was Ron who made her choice for her, by opening the door himself, and smashing right into her. At the sound to the commotion in the door way, Harry looked up and caught her eye. For a whole wonderful moment she was once again unable to breath, her eyes caught in his, unable to look away. She made a strangled sound in the back of her throat, shoved her potatoes at Ron, and ran as fast as she could out into the garden, leaving Ron staring bemusedly after her. "Should I…?" he asked, turning around and putting down the potatoes.
"No, I'll go." Harry said quickly, and hurried around the table and out the door…
What if I fall?
What if I don't?
What if I never make it home?
What if I bleed?
What if I break?
And I find that I can't take,
The city bellow the citadel,
Holding my own hand? …
"Ginny? I know your there Gin, come out!" Harry was calling her name, but there was no way that she would give up her hiding place. If he wanted to talk to her, he could blood well find her himself.
"Ginny, I know I've been a complete and utter prat, and that I don't deserve to look at you let alone talk to you, but I need to clear a few things up." Harry called out, looking vainly around him. He waited a moment then spoke in a voice so soft it was almost a whisper. "Ginny, please, give me a chance. Please?" Something in his voice, which was soft and warm and pleading, melted her resolve. Oh bugger it, she thought, before she straightened, and stood up from behind the bush she had used as her hiding place
"Fine. What have you got to say for yourself?" She asked before she could think better of it. Turning around, she found that he was staring at her, but when she met his eyes, he quickly dropped his gaze to his feet.
"Other than how incredibly sorry I am for what I said by the lake," he said without looking up, "I want to say that there is no way for me to live without you. I've made the worst mistake of my life . I should have known, but I had to try to keep you safe. People I love have a funny habit of being murdered, because of me, and I wanted to at least consider that. I wanted to keep that from happening to you…I…I don't know what I would do if you…if one day…" he broke off, looking up at her with pleading eyes. And suddenly she couldn't breathe again. He loved her.
"I understand." She said, smiling shyly at him. "That doesn't mean you aren't the biggest prat in the world, but I understand, and I forgive you. But promise me something; never ever break up with me for my own good, ever again, alright?"
"Never."…
I'm holding on to something,
It's keeping me from jumping, I'm so afraid to go it alone …
He caught her eye again, but this time he didn't look away. Instead he grabbed her tight to him, pressing his lips firmly against hers. Ginny breathed fully for the first time since school got out. She inhaled sharply as Harry rested his face against her neck. Then she sighed, but this time she was sighing from contentment, not unhappiness. And as she sighed, she buried her face in Harry's hair, and he laughed against her neck, and she realized that in the end, everything would be alright after all. More people would die, still more would disappear, but she would have Harry, and Harry loved her, and as long as that was true, she would be able to go on. Forever…
And holding up this fortress,
With imaginary forces,
Longing for a life lived bellow…
What if I fall?
What if I don't?
What if I never make it home?
What if I bleed?
What if I break?
And find that I can't take,
The city bellow the citadel,
Holding my own hand.