Christmas
"Uh…thanks!" Hugo Weasley looked up at his granddad with a confused smile. "But…er…what is it?"
"It's a Muggle toy!" Arthur replied enthusiastically. "You ask it a question and shake it, and then it'll tell you the answer."
"And just where did you get your hands on that?" Molly Weasley gave her husband a stern look.
"It's from the store, Mum," George cut in. "Just for fun."
Molly still looked suspicious. "And it's not been charmed in any way?"
"Not at all."
"Fine, but if I find out that you've done anything to it…" Molly sighed in concession.
All at once, several of Hugo's many cousins rushed over, excited about Hugo's present.
"Let me try!"
"Shove off, James; Hugo's not tried it yet!"
"Ask it a question!"
"Go on, Hugo!"
Hugo closed his eyes and paused for a moment. Then he shook the Eight Ball and glanced down to see what it said.
"Ha! I knew it!" He yelled triumphantly.
"What? What did it say?"
Hugo grinned. "It said 'Yes.'"
"What did you ask it?"
"I asked it if Albus took the last chocolate frog."
"Did not! That ball is a liar!"
Other presents lay forgotten under the tree; for several hours the Potter and Weasley children were preoccupied with Hugo's gift.
Gryffindor Common Room
"So how will you die this week?" Lily asked Hugo with amusement.
"Apparently I'll drown in a gigantic cauldron on Thursday," he replied. "Not likely, seeing as I was supposed to starve to death over the holidays."
Lily snorted. "Told you Divination was rubbish." Professor Trelawney had been at Hogwarts since before their parents were in school. According to them, she was just as batty back then. Hugo himself hadn't seen what was wrong with her…until she decided to make him her new subject. Every week she predicted his death in some new, horrible way. What was worse was that some people actually bought it and proceeded to ask him regularly if his affairs were in order. It got old very quickly.
"Now I've got to do a dream diary. I don't dream! Never have. What am I supposed to do?"
"Isn't it obvious? Make it up, you dolt!" Lily loved her cousin like a brother, but he could be so unimaginative sometimes.
"Right. So last night I dreamt that…I was buying a new quill. And because Pluto crosses in front of Jupiter, my hair will start on fire next Tuesday. How's that?"
Lily nodded thoughtfully. "Not bad for your first try. Let's see…ooh! I know. Tomorrow night you'll dream of purple unicorns! And then you'll discover a new magical creature, which will bite your arm off."
"Because?"
"Because Mars and Saturn align next month, of course!" Hugo was impressed. No wonder Lily always got out of sticky situations- she was brilliant at thinking on her feet. He finished scribbling in the entry and then looked up at Lily.
"Got it." They picked up their things and left for class; Hugo to Divination and Lily to Muggle Studies.
Divination
"Do you all have your dream diaries?" Hugo rolled his eyes and reached into his backpack. Instead of parchment, his hand came up with a round object. I guess I never put it away. As he started to put it back, however, a smile slowly spread across his face. Who said Lily's the only one who gets ideas?
Professor Trelawney came around to check that everyone brought their diaries. When she came to the table Hugo shared with his friends Vanessa Finnigan and Jacob Anderson, she stopped.
"What is that?"
Hugo smiled innocently. "It's like the Inner Eye...sorta."
"That is ridiculous, boy. Only select few are blessed with the Gift! A mere toy couldn't possibly compare to the real thing, as I should know," she said with a flourish.
"Try it. Just ask a question and shake it."
A few muggle-borns in class were fighting to hold back laughter, but most of the students who had grown up with magic seemed intrigued.
"I suppose…" Trelawney adjusted her large spectacles and cleared her throat. "Will I break anything today?"
Chances are good, it read.
"Rubbish!" She exclaimed. "I shan't break anything until tomorrow, and I will certainly not miss that horrid vase."
Dream diaries were disregarded for the rest of the lesson, as everyone completely ignored the Professor in favor of the Magic Eight Ball. At first the questions were innocent: "Am I going to be a prefect?" "Will Gryffindor win the next Quidditch match?" Hugo made a mental note to warn his sister when a geeky-looking Ravenclaw boy asked the ball "Will Rose say yes when I ask her to study with me this weekend?" Unfortunately the Professor overheard when Jacob asked if Trelawney's Inner Eye was foggy today. (She didn't like the answer.)
The best part of the lesson came near the end. Trelawney had entirely given up on controlling the classroom and was sitting in a velvet chair near the window. She had poured herself tea, but didn't take a sip as she glared in the general direction of whoever was holding the Eight Ball at the time.
"Just think. If Muggles can all see the future with these things, why haven't wizards come up with something like it? I mean, why are we bothering with tea leaves and dream diaries of all things if we can just shake a ball and find out the future? These Muggles are geniuses!" Jacob exclaimed, thrilled at the idea of no more Divination. Hugo glanced at their professor, who was gripping her pink teacup so tightly that her knuckles had turned white. Jacob, oblivious to Trelawney's reaction, continued.
"No more palm readings, or crystal balls, or bird entrails…this could revolutionize Divination! Completely transform the fortunetelling market. We could make mountains of gold selling these things! Who wouldn't pay, say, ten Galleons to find out their future? This is amazing!"
"Jacob…" Hugo started. But it was too late.
"The Inner Eye is not something to be imitated by a toy! Nonsense! All of it! Only a select few are blessed with the gift of seeing Beyond. I will not allow the use of a foolish Muggle object in my classroom. It interferes with vibrations from the Beyond! I don't expect any of you to understand these things, because obviously none of you possess the Sight." Professor Trelawney fumed. She had risen from her armchair and was now standing stiffly in front of it, still clutching her teacup.
"Neither do you," muttered Vanessa.
"I foresee all of you receiving Troll on your next examination!" Trelawney cried. Her teacup fell from her hands and shattered on the ground. She stared at it for a moment before shrieking loudly and storming over to the trapdoor, descending with as much dignity and fury as she could.
The class sat in silence. Then Hugo couldn't help chuckling at the ridiculousness of their situation. Soon everyone else was in stitches, faces red and eyes watery.
"Did you see her face?"
"And the teacup!"
In short, Hugo as well as his entire Divination class ended up in detention writing lines. But they were still laughing, because they couldn't wait to see Trelawney's reaction to her late Christmas present.
I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination Class.