Chapter.1: Decision's.
Normal P.O.V.
Bella had been noticing, that ever since her birthday three days ago, that Edward, Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie had all been acting strange, like they were all on edge, sure she knew it was probably just a vampire thing, being around human's all the time, I was normal for them to get stressed. But this seemed, different, more guarded, like they were trying to hide it from even her. She was utterly confused, she thought that after having spent so much time with them all that they would have spoken to her about it, unless she was the problem.
Fear and guilt over took her as she thought about all the different things that she might have done to anger them. 'maybe it's because of what happened at my birthday?' Bella thought to herself, as the teacher continued to talk about an upcoming project. As she continued to dwell on it, the thought of having done them wrong began to eat away at her, and by the time lunch rolled around, she found that she had lost her appetite. She slowly made her way to her normal table in the cafeteria, quietly sitting down at the table, she mindlessly pushed her food around, too caught up in her own guilt to even want to eat. As Bella continued to try and figure out what she had done wrong, she didn't realize that, her emotions we no longer just hers, nor did she pay mind to the fact that her friend's had been trying to talk to her but she just didn't seem to notice.
Jasper's P.O.V.
The moment that Bella stepped into the cafeteria, a wave of suffocating emotions slammed into me so fast and unexpectedly, that I thought I was going to choke. I was confused, why would Bella be feeling so much guilt, laced with fear and an unyielding amount of pain. I felt weird, like I wanted to just hold her, comfort her by telling her everything will be ok, it scared me, I didn't know what to think, one moment, I want to drink her dry and the next I wanted to protect her.
'pfft, please, she will never want someone like me, I'm a monster, plus I have a wife.' I thought to myself, a wife, how could I even call Alice my wife. We never told our family about us getting a divorce twenty five years ago, we didn't want to ruin all the happiness, so we just kept it to our self's and moved on. Don't get me wrong I love Alice, just I'm no longer in love with her, I view her more as a sister now. Once more I was bought out of my own thought's when another wave of guilt washed over me, and when I glanced over at Bella, I was shocked to see her looking at me.
Was I the reason she felt guilty, maybe she felt bad for what happened on her birthday, what if she thought It was all her fault. No, I couldn't allow her to destroy herself with those kinds of thoughts. Looking at my sibling's that's when I notice that they all looked sort of out of it, calming myself down, and drowning out Bella's feeling's for a moment, I was again hit right in the face with another tsunami of emotion's only this time it came from my family, which shocked me. They we're all fighting with their bloodlust, again I choked on air, I felt like I couldn't breathe and since vampire's normally don't have to meant that they we're on the brink of snapping. Once more I distracted myself with thoughts of Bella, turning to look at her once more, I decided, that she didn't deserve to have those feeling's hanging on her like super glue, so I sent her wave after wave of calmness, and almost sighed in pure bliss as she began to calm down.
Almost instantly I could feel her happiness and gratitude, for helping her relax, I continued to send her feelings of calmness, she turned to look at me as well, and she then smiled at me. Once more I became confused and decided to let her know, I raised one of my eyebrows in a silent gesture, asking her if she was ok, and she once more dazzled me with her smile and nodded her head, stating that yes, and she was thankful. Before I could dwell on it more, the lunch bell rang signaling the end of lunch, standing I gathered my stuff, and went to throw out my prop lunch, when I looked back to look at Bella she was making her way out of the cafeteria, as if sensing my eyes on her, she turned her head and gave me one last smile before heading to class.
Bella's P.O.V.
I don't know why, but I was suddenly grateful to have Jasper in my life, I also came to realize that, I never really paid much attention to him, and for some reason I felt guilty I never having tried to get to knowing him. I continued to make my way to my third period class, thanking god that I for once didn't trip on thin air, sitting down at my desk, I came to the realization, that I actually wanted to get to know Jasper more, I wanted to spend time with him, it confused me at first, but my confusion turned into giddiness, which again caused me to get confused.
I continued to contemplate on what I going to do, and came to a conclusion, starting today I was making it my mission to get to know Jasper, and hopefully we could be friends. I know that his family didn't trust him around me after what had happened on my birthday, but it was understandable to me, of course he slipped, but who wouldn't especially when humans are naturally a vampire's food source. I forgave him, he wasn't at fault, I know that jasper would never truly hurt me, and that made me smile. He was just very miss understood, and they didn't have any faith in him, and that made me sad, again confusion came over me, why was I so suddenly interested in jasper?
'Could i…could I be developing feelings for jasper?' I thought to myself as I packed up my school supplies and made my way to my truck. I knew it was wrong, for one I was with Edward, and another thing, jasper was married to Alice. It pained me to think that even Alice was disappointed in jasper, and that's when another thought raced through my mind, 'what if the bloodlust he was feeling was intensified from everyone else all feeling it…oh my god, it was?' deciding I needed to talk to jasper, I quickly started up my truck, and sped off towards home, I would go visit the Cullen's after I went and left a note to Charlie, telling him where I would be, and that I would be back in time to cook him dinner.
Now all I had to do was come up with a plan, that would not only allow me to spend time with jasper, but to find out if my thoughts about the plainly not perfect family were true, as soon as I pulled into the driveway, I quickly turned off my truck, and made my way into the house and up the stairs to my room. I took a quick shower, before dressing in a nice pair of black jeans and a nice black long sleeved shirt with my convers, I brushed my hair and put it into a nice low ponytail, slipped on a simple black zip up hoodie, once I deemed myself worthy, I ran down stairs, wrote my note for Charlie, grabbed an apple and my key's, I once more got into my truck and I took off towards the Cullen's house, it was now or never I thought to myself with a smile before biting into my apple.
Jasper's P.O.V.
I still couldn't wrap my mind around this, I was beginning to have feelings for a human, that not only did I try to attack, but was also dating my brother, what the hell was wrong with me, once more I found myself sighing as another image of Bella passed through my mind, and a small smile tugged at the corner of my lips. 'I must be sick, Bella for one would never want to be with someone like me' I thought to myself, but still I couldn't keep my mind off her, and I was grateful that I knew how to block my thought's from Edward, he would surely blow a gasket if he knew I liked Bella.
A few memories that I had of Bella raced through my head and made me smile, it was then that I noticed, that she had a unique scent, it consisted of jasmine and the fresh crisp air after a thunderstorm, like back home in Texas, it was comforting, and yet exciting all at the same time. As more memories of Bella paced through my head I found myself, becoming angry toward the way Edward treated her, sure we all knew and understood she was a human, and I was understandable for them to hurt themselves, and to be naturally clumsy, but he just down right disgusted me.
He treated her like she was a fragile piece of glass, and was always so controlling of her, never allowing her to do things that she liked, it was sickening how he made all her decisions for her, and if she argued, he'd hold the fact that she wanted to be changed against her to get her to agree. It was inhumane, some of the thing's he'd say or do to her, and it made me want to rip Edward to pieces, and to prove to Bella that not every guy wanted to control her, to show her what real love was like…. The moment the thought passed through my head I knew, I could no longer take to staying in the back seat, I was developing feelings for Bella, and I'd be damned if I allowed Edward break her heart, or worse, kill her.
So using the knowledge that the family was going on a hunting trip, I started planning on how I was going to get Bella to notice me, I really was at a loss on what to do, seeing as how before now, we never really spent time together or got to know each other. 'right so first I'm going to have to get her to trust me.; I thought to myself, a wave of happiness washed over me as I thought to myself that for once I actually enjoyed having feelings for someone, I knew that I was going to be able to just be myself for once, and that made me truly happy.
A/N: Well, tell me what you think, it's been a while since I wrote anything, and I'm a bit rusty but I really wanted to start back up again with a twilight fic, I just love jasper…please review, even criticism is welcome. Ja ne.