Dora Goes Exploring: The U.S. Experience
One day Dora the Explora was walking home from beaner school. She skipped along the dirt road to her house, careful not to step on any of the many homeless she encountered along the way. She arrived at her humble abode. As she approached, the smell of coffee and cocaine floated out of the shoddily boarded windows and filled her nostrils. She loved the buzz. Dora then opened the gate of the barbed wire fence that encompassed her family's shit shack. The screams of rape and stab victims could be heard in the distance.
Dora stepped into the dank hut and was greeted by her grandma. "Abuela!" she said in joy. "How are you today?" But Dora's enthusiasm was not matched. Her granny looked somewhat sad, however it was hard to tell what with all the smoke coming from the meth lab in the back of the house. "Dora, your parents have told me that they don't want you to stay here anymore. They think that you'd be better off going to school in America." As she finished her sentence two of the twenty children that lived in the small house ran in front of the old bag. Dora was shocked yet elated. She had always wanted to visit America and steal someone's job. Abuela continued, "You'll be leaving with your uncle Jesus tomorrow and he'll hop the border with you."
The next day Jesus and Dora left for the Mexican-U.S. border. They packed lightly, Jesus with a couple bags of heroine and a needle and Dora with only her backpack and map (a while ago they had to eat Boots so they didn't starve. It was a good feast and Dora liked her new red boots). They arrived and Jesus directed Dora to a hole that he pre-dug for them that ran under the fence. Within a few hours they were well into Texas. They lived in Austin and took many people's jobs. They were on their way to leading normal American lives.
Dora started living like a proper, white, American girl. Everyday she went to school in a flannel shirt, yoga pants, UGG boots and Ray-bans. On her way she would stop at starbucks to get a coffee and talk with the other girls about their boyfriends or how wasted they got at the most recent party, even though she was only eight years old.
Dora's school was somewhat far away, and being in the city of Austin Dora had to take the subway. On her way with her friends she was enjoying her hafl-decaff-frapuccino-macchiato. When suddenly a masked man ran up to the group and tried to steal one of Dora's friends' purses. Bravely, she stepped in front of the robber and said, "Swiper, no swiping!"
She was immediately stabbed.
However, Dora did not get the care she needed. At the hospital the doctors reviewed her records and discovered that she and her heroine addicted uncle were illegal immigrants. They were deported back to Mexico and Dora bled out right next to the border and died in a ditch. Jesus looted her body for drug money and went back to his mother's house. THE END