Motivation to Change
By
C0nfidentHinata
Author's Note: I my really awesome friends Zoe A.W and Terra-chan have stories which are sky rocketing. So be sure to check them out. Well I don't want to fall behind so here's one I random thought of while taking my health test. There's five steps to become motivated to change, as says in my health book, and I think Hinata has gone through all these steps. So this is what this fanfiction is about. Each Chapter will be a different step. So sounds like something you would read?
Chapter One
Awareness- I choose to Change
She lived her life like any ordinary little girl would, smiling and taking the world as it came. The little facts that bothered her, she hid in the back of her mind: Her uncle's death, her cousin's hatred, and all these hard to understand memories that would bring tears.
The empty hallways were always a reminder. She felt alone walking down them at night. Her little kimono swept across her knee as she looked around. Her five year logic screamed at her too go back in to her room because a monster would surely pop out of the dark and eat her in one bite. Her thirst was indeed stronger and kept her moving down the hallway.
She passed some pictures of her relatives in the main house. She could never name them all but she knew a few. She glanced at each picture trying to place a name to it but didn't spend to long before going to the next. It took her mind of the monster as she did. Then she got to a picture of her, her parents, and her little sister. She frowned. She knew those names to well. Her, Hinata Hyuuga, then Mom, then Dad, then her sister, Hanabi Hyuuga.
She never knew her mother. She was almost callused to missing her mom since she only existed in what she was told. Her dad seemed to have something against her but he still took care of her. She looked up to him and when it came down to it, he was her hero. The uncaring words or gestures he sometimes did she always hid in the back of her mind with the thoughts of what her mom would be like. Then there was Hanabi. She was pretty young and adorable. She could be annoying sometimes but she was her family.
Hinata smiled and kept going down the hall almost forgetting about the shadows.
At the end of the hall, she reached for the light switch. She felt along the wall and clicked it on. She looked around the kitchen making sure the coast was clear, she opened the bottom cupboard. She singled out a tiny clay cup, perfect for the size of her small hands. She picked up and then filled it with water.
"What are you doing?" a shrill boy's voice asked. Hinata spun around, almost spilling the water into the sink. Her heart fluttered at the sudden disturbance but she settled down when she saw it was just her cousin. He often caught her getting night time drinks. "Neji-niisan! You scared me" She almost giggled.
He just glared at her. Hinata frowned and turned off the water and put the cup on the table. Her cousin had been acting mean toward her ever since her uncle went away. She didn't know why and nobody dared explain it her. "Do you hate me?" She innocently asked looking straight into her cousin's white eyes.
"Yes" He answered. Hinata felt her little heart shake at his cold reply. He was after all like her brother, how could he hate her. She crawled up on to a chair and sipped some water from her cup. "Well I don't hate you" She said. Her cousin just frowned.
"what did I do?" she questioned him again. Neji bawled his hands in a fists and scrunched his face up. He looked ready to yell or maybe cry? "It's your fault my dad's dead! What if I killed your dad?!" his winey voice echoed though the kitchen. Hinata looked down at her water. She did what?
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Hinata was back facing her cousin seven years later. She had even more horrible thoughts hidden in her ever growing collection. This time she could counter them with happy ones. Her father disowned her, but now she had her sensei there. Her sister became stronger then her, but that just means she has to train. Neji hated her, but she had best friends and also her team mates, Shino and Kiba. Her father was no longer her hero, but she got a new one, Naruto uzimaki.
She wasn't a five year old little girl having midnight water breaks anymore. She was Hinata Hyuuga, standing in front of her cousin in the chunin exams. He looked at her the same way he did since that night in the kitchen. His words seemed to be revealing everything she tried to avoid. The truth he spoke cut like a knife. She didn't want to admit, it but he right. He questioned her motivate for coming to the exams, he said he knew she was to nice to be a ninja and that she came because Kiba and Shino wanted too.
Her thoughts became reality and the area started to not matter anymore. Why did she come? Yes, Kiba and Shino wanted too. They were perfectly ready and she knew they could become Chunin. She was happy with where she was at but yes, Kiba and Shino needed her too enter. Is that why?
No it couldn't be. She wanted to come because…Maybe, just maybe she could be different then she always was. That she wouldn't be scared of messing up anymore. That she could become a chunin. That she could prove her disowning father wrong, that maybe she could be different. Maybe she could change.
"No…Your wrong, your wrong…I wanted…I had to find out...I did it because I wanted to see if I could change" her frail words seemed weak against neji's.
"…People can't change no matter how hard they try" She gasped. What? That can't be true. She had to change. She had to do it; she didn't want to be like this forever. "They can't run away from there true nature…" she had been running away from her nature her whole life, what would make her think that entering the chunin exams could help her change. "A failure always a failure" She seemed alone now, like she had put herself in the land of locked up stuff she was trying to forget.
Neji's words rang sharp in there and now everything was unavoidable. Maybe she was a failure and maybe she couldn't change that. Maybe Neji was right…
At that moment Hinata was scared. She listened to neji with only a little flame at hope he was wrong. Her own fear that he was right over took her. "what you really want to do is run…" He was right, but she couldn't let him. The little flame of hope flickered. "Your wrong about me, your wrong…" She could feel her body shaking. Everything she had hid was starting to attack her.
Neji looked at her with the veins around his eyes bulging with charka. It seemed to the face of her internal and external attacker. The little flame got dimmer with every shaken breath she took. She was pulled down by her thoughts. She couldn't change, she would die a failure, all the happy thoughts she once had would hate her, and she was going too lose.
"My eyes can not be deceived" She jumped backed to the terror that awaited her in the area. Neji read her moments and everything that she had thought. How could he know? She was more then scared, she was terrified. He was going to be right. She couldn't let him in her locked up thoughts, but he predicted she was doing that by her arm placement. How? The dwindling flame of hope squeaked. The little hope still was fighting but losing to Neji's forceful words. It tried not to let her panic but it wasn't working. Neji vocalized her knew.
What Hinata didn't know was that she could change. She had to be aware of it. She just needed one person that she would believe to show her the way out of the locked memories.
"That does it!" a scream yelled from the stands. It was naruto. Her heavy head looked up and the little flame of hope just got a little bigger. Just a little. Naruto's shout had shifted her attention a little.
"Who gave you the right to tell her what she can or can't be?! Go on Hinata! Show this guy he's wrong!" Her flame of hope shouted with Naruto's voice. You have to have your own truth! Was he questioning the only truth she had? Neji's words. Who was he to know who she was? All the happy thoughts pointed there swords and destroyed the hated thoughts. His name was Naruto.
The minute her mind said that, He became her hope.
"Are you just gonna stand there and take that, Hinata? Do something your driving me crazy!" She felt her happy thoughts winning. Her Hope burned inside of her and it was proving Neji wrong. It was forming her own truth.
A picture of a little Hinata getting off the chair with a clay cup in her hand played before her. "You can't change what happened!" the little neji shouted with rage. "I can try to change it" the five year smiled and held out the cup for her brother-like cousin to take, he stopped and his features softened as he took the cup. "I guess you can" Then the little girl skipped to her room. I can try and change it
She couldn't not try. 'your right naruto' She was back in the area and not stuck in her mind. She could do it. She could fight her cousin, and even if she lost, she was going to change her self. 'Thank you' she said firmly in her mind. She looked up.
Neji stared back at her, her fears stared back at her. "If you don't forfeit that match you know what will happen" She got ready to turn on her blood. No, she didn't know what will happen but she will let it change her. 'I won't run away' her mind said to herself. For once, she wouldn't run away and hide it all in the back of her head.
Naruto flashed in her mind. He never ran away. He changed himself. She was what she wanted to be. She had ran away. 'Never again' she said to her self as she made each hand sign with confidence. 'no more hiding' her blood line activated and she wore it with pride no sorrow.
She got into her stance. She was going to fight everything in this one match, how she came out of it didn't matter. "Defend yourself, my brother"
'I choose to change'
The end! Hope you liked it. The next chapter where be another stage in Hinata's life where she goes to the next step. 'thinking-I know how to change' also I took the hinata vs. Neji scene from the anime. Know that masashi kishimoto owns these wonderful characters and this might turn into a narutoxHinata. So keep reading people!