Title: Blind Date
Author: litaandjeffforever
Email: litaandjeffforever@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Content: A few curse words.
Characters: Lita (Amy Dumas), Edge (Adam Copeland), Chris Benoit (Chris Benoit), Lilian Garcia (Lilian
Garcia), Matt Hardy (Matt Hardy), and Stacy Keibler (Stacy Keibler)
Catagory: Romance, humor
Het/Slash/Both: Het
Disclaimer: I don't own any of them...I wish I did, but I don't.
Summary: Lita and Lilian are set up on a blind double date. Answer to Karen's challenge to use the Muffin
Man scene from Shrek.

"Hey Lita," Lilian Garcia said as she walked into the women's locker
room. Lita looked over from where she was doing her hair. "Hi Lil, how ya
doing?" she said with a wide grin on her face. "Uh, Lita, I got a favor to ask
you," Lilian stated sitting down on one of the benches. "What's up Lil, you know
I'll help you out however I can," Lita said coming over to sit next to her friend on
the bench.
"Jericho and Trish have come up with the brilliant idea of setting me up
on a blind date. It was an interesting proposition, but before I could agree they
threw another idea at me. They are making it a double blind date. And since you
are my best friend, I want you to be the other female there," Lilian explained. "I
don't know Lil. I mean, it wasn't too long ago that Matt dumped me on National
TV, who'd want me?" Lita said.
"Come on L, we'll have fun even if we can't stand whoever they pair us
up with. Please?" Lilian begged. "Alright! Alright, but if this backfires, you owe
me big time!" Lita smiled as she gave the petite ring announcer a hug as they
started giggling.
A week later…….
"I look stupid! Why did they have to pick a fancy restaurant? Why
couldn't we just go to a club?" Lita complained as Lilian curled her hair into a
wild cascade down her back. "Lita, you look terrific! Whoever they're fixing you
up with will be completely floored when they see you!" Lilian exclaimed.
Lita was wearing a low cut strapless dress that only came down to mid
thigh with a slit up the sides. On her feet were 4" chunky heels that laced half
way up her calves. The dress and shoes were a deep forest green that enhanced
the rich blues and greens in her tattoo and brought out the green in her eyes.
"You look a hell of a lot better than I do, face it Lil, you belong in fancy
places – I belong back in the kitchen washing dishes. I mean look at you! You
look so sophisticated," Lita gestured to Lilian's attire. Lilian had on a turquoise
dress that matched her eyes. Her blonde hair was piled artistically on top of her
head with loose curls framing her face. She wore a scoop neck, spaghetti
strapped dress that was fitted on top but flared at the waist – flowing down to
her knees. On her feet were classic turquoise pumps.
"Come on, Lita, that's crazy! You look amazing, we're gonna knock 'em
dead! Let's go – the limo's waiting downstairs," Lilian exclaimed, grabbing Lita's
hand and dragging her out of the room and together they ran giggling
breathlessly to the limo.
The limo pulled up to the Italian restaurant. Lilian and Lita walked into
the restaurant arm in arm as their nerves sent butterflies fluttering in the two
women's stomachs. The maitre d escorted the two ladies towards the back of the
restaurant to a secluded table. As they walked up, two men stood and turned
around to face them.
Edge and Chris Benoit both gasped as they saw Lita and Lilian walking
towards them. Them two men had to make a conscious effort to pick their jaws
up off the floor. The maitre d left them alone as Edge pulled Lita's chair out for
her and Chris did the same for Lilian.
"Lita, wow, you look stunning!" Edge murmured as he scooted his chair
around to sit next to her. Chris followed suit and exclaimed, "You look gorgeous
Lilian!" Dinner was progressing nicely. Everyone was having a wonderful time,
talking and laughing. Lita excused herself to go use the restroom, on her way
back her wonderful evening took a turn for the worse.
"Well, well, well, looks like the groupie is playing dress up!" A snide
voice stated from behind her followed by a high pitched giggle. Lita squared her
shoulders as she turned and came face to face with Matt Hardy and Stacy
Keibler. "What do you want, Matt?" Lita asked tersely. "Me? I don't want
anything – I'm just here having a nice romantic dinner with Stacy. You see –
she's the kind of girl a guy can take to fancy places like this. I could never take
you anywhere – with that tattoo you belong at a rock concert, not a sophisticated
place like this," Matt said with a nasty smirk on his face. With that he and Stacy
sauntered off.
Lita made her way back to the table where she grabbed her purse and
said, "I'm outta here – I'm sorry, I gotta go!" She started to run out the door and
Edge ran after her. "Lita! Wait," Edge called as he caught up with her.
He touched her arm and spun her around. "Lita, what happened? Why
are you leaving?" Edge asked. "This was a mistake, I don't belong here! I
shouldn't have come," Lita cried as tears started to fill her eyes. She flinched as
they heard an annoying giggle and a familiar snide voice, "Oh look, he's taking
pity on her. How pathetic!" Edge turned his head and caught sight of Matt with
Stacy perched on his arm.
"Shit," Edge swore as he quickly put two and two together. "Come here
sweetheart," Edge murmured as he pulled her towards him and wrapped Lita
tightly in his arms. "Lita, you belong here just as much as she does – I don't
know what exactly he said to you, but don't believe a word he said," Edge said
as he rocked her gently in his arms.
Chris and Lilian came running out of the restaurant – having had to stop
and pay the check. "Is everything ok? What's going on?" they asked breathlessly.
"Hardy's here and being a jackass," Edge stated through gritted teeth as he
cradled Lita even closer. "Oh L, I'm so sorry," Lilian said stroking Lita's hair as
she remained securely in Edge's arms. "Red, you want me to go put him in a
cross face?" Chris asked, completely serious, but managing to coax a teary laugh
from the distraught redhead. Lita looked up, "Nah, but thanks Chris. Let's just
go somewhere else."
Lita, Edge, Lilian, and Chris all headed back to the hotel. They parted
ways in the lobby; everyone going to their respective hotel rooms to change and
then they were going to meet back in Lilian and Lita's room to watch some
movies.
"Lita, I'm so sorry that Matt ruined your evening. He's such a jerk!" Lilian
said as she and Lita walked into their room. Lita changed into a pair of jeans and
a red tank top, Lilian into a pair of jeans and a black sweater. "It's ok, Lil. He just
pointed out the obvious," Lita muttered. "No, Lita, he was wrong – I mean we
were having a great time before he showed up weren't we?" Lilian asked. Lita
smiled, "Yeah, we were."
"What do you think of Chris? I mean, in the ring he seems so mean, but I
don't know. I think he's really handsome!" Lilian said. "Well, he obviously likes
you a lot. I mean, he talked to you the entire time and he sat really close to you at
dinner. He hardly took his eyes off of you the entire evening," Lita stated. "What
do you think about Edge?" Lilian asked. A blush blossomed across Lita's cheeks.
"Aha, you like him don't you?" Lilian exclaimed. "Am I that
transparent?" Lita asked. "He's so sweet and attentive. I'll tell you something –
when he called me sweetheart I got a serious case of butterflies. To tell you the
truth, when he took me in his arms – I felt more from his touch than I ever did
with Matt," she continued. "I think you should definitely pursue it," Lilian said
earnestly. "Well, you should pursue it with Chris," Lita retorted. The two women
looked at each other and burst into a fit of giggles.
Meanwhile…….
"I can't believe the gall of Hardy! Just you wait! Come Smackdown I'm
gonna nail his ass to a wall!" Edge raged as he changed into jeans and a T-shirt.
Chris chuckled, "Yeah, well I got your back with that. I don't remember ever
seeing you this pissed before. You really like her don't you?" "Chris – I've never
felt like this before. I mean she's so beautiful, and she could have any man she
wanted, but when I held her in my arms – I wanted to be the man in her life. The
only man," Edge said. "I know what you mean man, I feel the same way about
Lilian. When I saw her tonight I thought my heart was gonna stop," Chris
explained. "Well, come on – grab some DVD's and let's head down there!" Edge
exclaimed.
The guys grabbed the movies and headed down the hall to the women's
room, both hearts racing and their palms sweating.
Knock Knock
Lita threw open the door and exclaimed, "Come on in guys!" They did
and showed Lilian and Lita the movies they had brought. The stack was weeded
through and finally only two movies remained. A compromise was reached –
first the group would watch Shrek and then they'd watch Blade.
Lita and Edge settled on one bed – laying on their stomachs; Chris and
Lilian on the other bed – Lilian reclining against the headboard and Chris using
her leg as a pillow. Shrek started and Lita and Lilian started giggling. "What's so
funny?" Chris asked looking up curiously.
"This is our favorite part," Lilian laughed. "Yeah, and it's tradition that
we pause the movie and recite the lines," Lita added and paused the movie.
Lita : Do you know the Muffin Man?
Lilian : The Muffin Man?
Lita : The Muffin Man.
Lilian : Yes, I know the Muffin Man. Who lives on Drury Lane?
Lita : Well, she's married to the Muffin Man.
Lilian : The Muffin Man?
Lita : THE MUFFIN MAN!!!!!

"Oh my God!! You two sounded exactly like the characters in the movie!"
Edge laughed. "That's cause we practice all the time!" Lita giggled. They
restarted the movie and finished it, everyone laughing and joking.
After Shrek was over everyone got up and stretched their legs. Edge and
Chris made a run to the vending machines for drinks and snacks. After they got
back everyone settled back onto the beds. This time Lilian and Chris laying side
by side spoon fashion, Edge was resting back against the headboard and Lita
was lying in between his legs – her back against his chest.
The lights were off and Blade started. Everyone was engrossed in the
movie when Edge said softly, "Lita, I've had so much fun tonight. You looked
exquisite tonight – before when you were all dressed up and you look exquisite
now. Just so you know – I'd take you out anywhere," Edge murmured. "I love
your tattoo honey," he breathed into her ear. Lita blushed as Edge traced over
the lines of her tattoo, sending shivers up her spine.
Lita turned her head and looked up at him. "Edge, thank you for
everything tonight. With the exception of that little scene with Matt, tonight was
the most fun I've had in a long , long time," Lita said quietly. "Would you like to
go out again sometime?" Edge asked. "Yes, Edge, I'd love to!" She responded.
Edge leaned down and gently kissed Lita, sweetly with the promise of
passion. They broke away, both breathing heavily at the sound of applause. Both
Edge and Lita blushed deeply as Chris said, "It's about damn time!" "Shh, leave
them alone," Lilian scolded as she pulled him down for a gentle kiss.
Edge wrapped his arms tightly around Lita's waist as she snuggled closer
to him. The movie finished and everyone drifted off to sleep cocooned in each
other's arms.