Rule the World
Disclaimer: I'm working really hard on my British accent, but until I perfect that, I'm going to have a little trouble passing for J.K. Rowling.
A/N: This is nothing like my other fics. This is just a stupid little idea that jumped into my head yesterday. Bold and italics are for Voldie's thoughts. Italics alone are for Harry's thoughts.
"My Lord, I have found out how to defeat the Potter kid and rule the world!"
"What? What is it, Pettigrew? What is it? Tell me now!"
"It's so easy! I can't believe we never thought of it before! My Lord, actually all you have to do is to…" Peter Pettigrew trailed off slowly, not wanting any of the readers to find out what's happening.
Someone tell me why I'm doing this.
"A is for apple, B for ball, C for cat and D for dog..."
God! What did I do???
"E for elephant, F for fish, G for goat, H for hat..."
Save me from this misery!
"I for ice, J for jelly, K for king, L for lemon-drops..."
No, I won't. It's always me. No! No! NO!!
"M for money, N for nothing, O for orange, P for pickles..."
I AM LORD VOLDEMORT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
"Q for queen, R for road, S for singing, T for toes..."
I will not do this!
"U is for umbrella, V for vase, W for water, X for x-ray..."
I quit! I will not do this even if it means that learning my A-B-Cs can help me rule the world!
"Y for yes, Z for zebra! Congratulations Lord Voldemort, you have successfully finished learning your A-B-Cs! Now, you can rule the world!"
"Psst... Potter, come here."
"What's up, Voldie? Here to defeat me?"
"As a matter of fact, yes. I have just found the best way to do it!" Harry raised his eyebrows skeptically.
"Let me show you." Voldemort took a deep breath and started chanting…
"A is for apple, B for ball, C for cat and D for dog..."
Voldemort thinks that reciting the A-B-C is going to kill me?
"E for elephant, F for fish, G for goat, H for hat..."
What the hell is going on here?
"I for ice, J for jelly, K for king, L for lemon-drops..."
Harry couldn't help but to just double over in laughter.
It's working! The spell is actually working! Mental note to thank Pettigrew for this…
Merlin's beard, is Voldemort actually smiling?
"M for money, N for nothing, O for orange, P for pickles..." Voldemort added a little tango to it.
Harry fainted.
Harry Potter can never match me and my A-B-C!
Just a little something I thought of last night… Like it? Hate it? Review to let me know! Please review since you've already taken the time to read it. It'll be a total waste if you don't actually review it, and besides you'll get great karma (and chocolate cookies!) for reviewing!
Cheers, Sarah