Disclaimer : I don't own FF8 but Square does, and I don't own the Jerry Springer Show.
A/N : I guess I was on Kentucky Fried Chicken when I wrote this..... and on fatigue. Don't mix KFC and drowziness with FF8, or you'll get a wierd Jerry Springer rip-off. Read at your own risk, implied yaoi, Rinoa bashing and use of the f-word many times. I repeat : READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!
The Serry Jpringer Show
Serry : Hello everybody! Today, we'll reveal some FF secrets... and
it won't be really good to see! OK. Please welcome my fisrt guest, Squall
Leonhart!
Squall : ....Whatever, man.
Serry : So what's your problem?
Squall : I have this girlfriend, Rinoa, for 'bout three months and I'm here to tell her to GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!!
Audience : *Cheers and yellling*
Serry : But you have another secret.
Squall : Yeah. I'm cheating on her with Zell!
Audience : Awhhhh... KAWAIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!
Serry : Why?
Squall : First, she's a bitch, second she doesn't stop following me 'round, third, she's screaming my name everywhere, and I mean _everywhere_, fourth, Zell doesn't do one of these things and he's just sooo cute...
Audience : Awhhhh......
Serry : Are you ready to tell her?
Squall : What do you think? It's a 2½ months I want to tell her but she just doesn't stop talkin' to me so I don't have the time.
Serry : Let's bring her out. (And hopefully get her out). Rinoa!
Rinoa : *Comes on the stage, and instead of seating on the chair she sits on Squall.* Hi Serry! I got the most wonderful man on the surface of........ what's the name of the planet Squally-Wally?
Squall : Whatever.....
Rinoa : *Screaming* on Whatever!
Audience : BOOO!!!!!!
Rinoa : *Almost crying* MEANIES!!!!!!
Squall : Now get the fuck out of me.
Rinoa : Just a little longer..... please.
Serry : Are you ready to tell her?
Squall : Listen carefully. I - DON'T - LOVE - YOU - ANYMORE .I'm cheating on you.
Rinoa : *Breaks down and cry* MEANIE!!!! YOU MEANIE!!!!!!! With who the motherfuckin' hell are you cheating on me!
Serry : Bring the other one out!
Zell : *Runs on the stage*
Squall : *Pitches Rinoa who lands on her @$$, goes toward Zell and kisses him*
Audience : Awhhh...... Whoo-hoo!. *Cheers and yelling*
Zell : Wanna fight you bitch! Wanna fight?
Rinoa : Hell Yeah!
Zell : *Starts to beat the hell outta her*
Audience member : You don't call Svete for stopping'em?
Serry : NO! HELL NO! This is the best day of my life *wipes out a tear as Rinoa gets the beating of her lifetime*
Audience : ZELL! ZELL! ZELL! ZELL! ZELL!
Serry : I guess Zell is our fav. Mine too.
Zell : *Finishes off Rinoa with My Final Heaven*
Rinoa : *Dies a lot*
We'll come back after these messages!
Quistis : *Dressed in an S&M kinda outfit, whip in hand* You want to get whipped cream? Or get whipped with cream? So come at my room after 2:00 AM and I'll be waiting for you..... for your pleasure and mine! 200 Gil plus taxes, cream non-included.
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Irvine : Hello, his is Irvine Kinneas, directly from Balamb Garden for your daily weather broadcast. *Points at FF8 World Map* For the Balamb Region, sun all afternoon. For Trabia, a missile rain is coming, so get in a buker or get a real god umbrella. Timber and Deling City, expect a sorceress murder at 20:00 o'clock. Wait... what's the scenari9o doing in my papers?
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Squall : Finally, she's dead. Oof! Thanks Zell!
Serry : The world is saved once again. So hi Zell. How are you?
Zell : *Sings "I Feel Good" by James Brown* What do you think? She's dead, I got _the man_ and.......... I'll find another thing later.
Serry : Do you have plans for the future?
Squall : Well, we were talking "bout going on a trip, sumthin' like that.
Serry : Oh! We're outta time! My final quote : All is good that ends good. Well, until next time, thake care of yourself, and KILL RINOA!!!!
Audience : *Cheers and Yelling*
A/N 2 : So... how did you like my fisrt part? Not really
funny heh? Well, if I get any good reviews, I'll come up with another Serry
Jringer episode. Thanks for reading!