I love this guy so freaking much. Just as much as I love Canada, N/S Italy, England, Spain, and Scotland.
Maybe just a smidge more :3
It's…
THE HERO!
Has anyone else imagined Alfred coming up to you and asking you to be his Valentine?
Just me? …guess I need to get a life…JK, I'm not as antisocial as y'all might think I am.
Anyway, I don't own Hetalia, or you, considering that this is yet another Reader Insert.
The awesome line brought to you by the awesome Prussia.
England was good at romance. So was Spain. And France. And Scotland. Heck, even Sealand was good at romance!
America? Not so much.
Alfred F. Jones sat on his couch, indulging himself in yet another Big Mac. He then shoveled a handful of fries into his mouth. To wash it all down was a Diet Coke, because, as he would say, "You need to balance yourself out."
He unlocked his phone and glanced at the date. February fourteenth, otherwise known as Valentine's Day. Alfred groaned. He shoved another handful of French fries into his mouth.
"You'll be my Valentine, right McDonald's?" he asked the empty paper bag. Getting no response except for the one in his own head, he smiled. "I knew you would say yes!" He hugged the McDonald's bag, then gasped. "What do you mean I don't do things for you? Of course I do! I just…ate your contents! What do you mean that's not enough?" He turned his head away from the bag. "You know what, we're done." He scrunched the bag into a ball and threw it across the room.
"Stupid McDonald's bag and her stupid neediness…" His brooding was interrupted by a soft knock on the door. "Come in!" he called. The door opened, and his best friend, _, poked her head around it. She smiled at the sight of him.
"Hiya, Alfie!" she said as she entered the apartment. Alfred gave a grunt in response.
"Aren't you supposed to be out with your boyfriend?" he asked as he unwrapped yet another Big Mac. _ furrowed her eyebrows.
"I don't have a boyfriend…" she laughed. Only then did Alfred notice the large bags she had in her arms.
"What are those?" he asked, eager to change the subject from this awkward topic. _ lips broke into a smile as she looked from the bags to Alfred.
"These," she dropped the bags on the coffee table. "Are our 'Singles' Awareness' supplies." Alfred furrowed his blond eyebrows.
"What's that?" He finished the last of his Big Mac and moved onto his fries. _ snatched them from his grasp just in time. Alfred glared at her. "Woman, answer my question before I rip your heart out." _ shrugged as she dropped a fry into her mouth.
"Singles' Awareness," she began, swallowing her fry. "Is like anti-Valentine's Day. Single people celebrate being single. Therefore, you and I will celebrate together!" She plopped down on the couch beside him, then dumped the contents of the bag on the coffee table. Candy and other sorts of junk food dumped onto the table.
"It's like Christmas…" Alfred whispered, his baby blue eyes wide. _ giggled at the sight of her friend. She took a fun-size Milky Way and tore open the package, plopping the chocolate and caramel bar into her mouth.
Many more candy indulgences and trips to the bathroom later, _ and Alfred leaned against each other, groaning at the pain in their stomachs.
"Dude, Singles' Awareness," Alfred's sentence was interrupted by a burp. "Is the best damn holiday ever." _ chuckled at his response and sat up on the couch, turning to face Alfred.
"My work is done!" she cheered. Alfred raised an eyebrow.
"And what would that work be?" he asked. _ smiled.
"To make you happy on such a depressing holiday." Alfred sat up and turned to _.
"Valentine's Day is only depressing to certain people," he said. "Like, it isn't depressing for couples, you know?" _ pouted.
"Well, it's not depressing for either of us anymore, now is it?" Alfred shook his head, his signature grin on his face.
"Nope!" He patted his full stomach. "Al's all filled up and ready to sleep?"
"Al?"
"Yeah, I named my stomach." Alfred stared at the confused expression on _'s face. "You mean you didn't name your stomach?"
"No one does, Alfie," she laughed. She pushed herself onto her feet, wobbling slightly as she picked her purse off of the ground.
"Where are you going?" whined Alfred, getting to his feet.
"I have to get home, Alfred," She glanced at her watch. "It's nearly one in the morning." Alfred shook his head and pulled her into a hug.
"The hero wouldn't let a damsel in distress walk alone all the way home."
"Since when am I in distress?" At this response, Alfred kicked _'s feet out from under her, sending her to the ground. Alfred caught her just as she was about to his the floor.
"See? You're a clumsy girl." _ rolled her eyes and stood on her feet.
"Come on, Alfie, I need to go home."
"Nooo~" whined Alfred, holding _ to his chest. "I don't want you to go! Without you, I'd be like…like…Thor without his hammer!"
"What is the point of that analogy, exactly?" Alfred didn't seem to hear her. He just started saying more superhero analogies.
"Like Captain America without his shield! Like Hulk without his purple pants!" He held _ by the shoulders, looking her straight in the eyes. "You are my purple pants, _." The girl's eyebrows furrowed.
"Alfred, I don't understand what you're-" She was cut off by Alfred crashing his lips against hers. She went rigid at first, but eventually eased into the kiss.
"So…will you be the Peggy to my Captain America?" _ laughed and nodded.
"As long as you don't go landing planes into the Arctic."
Done! This was surprisingly easy to write…I mean, I had trouble with the beginning, but then things FLOOOOWWWWWEEEEED.
Anyway, it's late. I'm going to bed. Night Night.