An Understanding

Sakura stood outside of Sasuke's door; she wanted to knock, but something deep in the pit of her stomach kept her from doing it. She had been standing there for what felt like hours, just starring at the wooden door in front of her. She knew he was behind it; Sasuke was right on the other side. But she could not bring herself to knock.

"Are you just going to stand there? Or are you going to come in?" came a tired voice.

Startled, Sakura turned the door knob and entered the apartment. Sasuke was lying on his bed with his arms supporting his head. He kept his eyes closed as Sakura closed the door and made her way to the foot of his bed. The small apartment was almost pitch black, which gave Sakura an eerie odd feeling.

"May I sit next to you?" she asked him. "Can I talk with you?"

"Sure. What about?" Sasuke simply replied.

Sakura sat down childishly at his feet, staring at her hands. "I…I just wanted to talk." She began.

"About what exactly?" Sasuke's voice had an edge of annoyance to it.

"Well," Sakura felt embarrassed, but she did have a purpose for being here at such a late hour. "Sasuke, I've been thinking a lot lately about something. And it's hard, because I want it so badly, but I might push away the person I care most about."

Sasuke opened his eyes, he knew why she was here. He knew her every desire to be around him. However, he honestly did not know what he wanted out of the whole thing. He sat up slowly, but did not look at Sakura. Taking a deep breath, he said,

"Here's the thing. I don't care to be in a relationship, never have. That's just the kind of person I am."

"I know Sasuke, I know," Sakura's whole body tensed up. "That's why I'm here, I want to try and change that."

"You can't change the way people are Sakura." The level of his voice made her sink back. She stared at the floor.

"I'm not ignorant Sasuke, just hopeful." Sakura stood and walked to the side of his bed, staring down at his body. She began to open her mouth when Sasuke rose and stood in front of her; their noses almost touching. Sakura looked deep into his dark unreadable eyes; there was no emotion, no trace of warmth.

"Sasuke," Sakura whispered his name in the most wanting tone he had ever heard her say. "Tell me you don't want this. Tell me you have never wanted or loved anyone before…"

"Don't you dare ask me what love is! Do you even know my past?" Sasuke was yelling. "Don't come in here and ask me to love you when I don't even know what it is!"

Sakura couldn't breathe; her whole body was frozen from the horrible energy Sasuke was emitting. All she could do was stare into his fiery eyes.

"I think it's time you left." He said in a low voice.

"No, I'm not leaving, not like this!"

"I said leave Sakura!"

Sasuke reached out and grabbed Sakura by the wrist; the strength of his grip was so strong is hurt her, she knew she would have a bruise later. Backing up, Sakura tried to pull away from him, but Sasuke held firm. There was hurt in his eyes, a look that summed up all of his childhood that he had been hiding behind.

"Sasuke," Sakura knew she had to try and break his iron barrier. "Please, let me help you. You don't have to be alone any more Sasuke."

"Dam it!" Sasuke grabbed Sakura's other wrist and shoved her hard against the wall next to his bed.

"Of course I'm alone, I always have and I always will be!"

"No!"

Sakura forcefully pressed her face to his, their lips molding together; Sasuke's fiery heat sending waves down her spine. She expected him to hit her, or revolt in disgust; but instead, Sasuke grabbed either side of her face with his hands and deepened the kiss further. She could feel him wanting inside her mouth, and she didn't hesitate. He kissed forcefully, quickly, hard, and eagerly. When they parted for air, Sakura could feel her lips already begin to swell from the intense pressure he had kissed her with. Sasuke let his hands fall from her face to his sides and let his head bow. His bangs covered his watery eyes.

Gently, slowly, Sakura brought his face to level with hers; wiping away the flood of sudden tears that were creating streams down his face. "All you have to do is let yourself open up to me Sasuke. Let me be there for you, and let me care for you. It's ok to have someone tell you its ok and that everything will work out in the end. Because," Sakura brushed away the hair covering his eyes. "I'll always be there for you; you don't have to be alone. You never have been, you have friends, and if you'll let me, I want to be more than that."

Sasuke stared at the milky white of her neck, "I know. I wont push you away any more Sakura, I'm sorry."

"Oh Sasuke," Sakura threw her arms around his neck, wanting to be as close to him as possible.

Sasuke slowly brought his hands to the small of her back, pressing her gently to him. "Sakura, can you leave? I…I need some time to myself."

Sakura drew back with a startled looked on her face; though she understood why he wanted to be alone now.

"Alright. Will I see you tomorrow at practice?"

"Do I ever miss?" His tone was returning to how she knew him best.

"No, I guess not." Sakura could tell that he was exasperated. So she moved away from him slowly and headed towards the door. "Sasuke, I…"

"You've already said enough Sakura, more than I need to hear for one night. I'll see you later."

Nodding, Sakura left Sasuke sitting on the bed, his head in his hands. Although she had made more progress with him than she had ever hoped; she didn't know how long "later" would be until she saw him next. Heading down the dark street, Sakura felt more empty and confused now, than she had before talking to Sasuke. There were so many unanswered questions still, but at least they had come to some sort of understanding.