Author's Notes: So this is a crazy idea. I have to admit, I don't know what was on my mind when I came up with this. Basically, me and a few friends were talking about Zuko, and how he always had this lisp. I mentioned it was "Daffy Duck with a lot less spit", and suddenly, boom, I started imagining our favorite Looney Tunes playing the characters of the show. Cameos, guest appearances by characters from other shows, it all started to form in my mind in a whirlwind of toons and bending. And here's the first chapter: an experiment.
A warning, though. I have pulled some of the character's personality from other places in the Looneyverse, but in the end, I'll mesh them all together with the Avatar character's personality. Like with Lola. She's playing Lola, and while I love her personality in the Looney Tunes Show, her personality in Space Jam fits the role more than the other one. Therefore, this Lola is a mish-mashup of all those personalities, plus Lola's. Hopefully you guys like my choices, and have fun reading!
Chapter One: The Bunny in the Iceberg
A small, lonely canoe floated along the current in the quiet, icy sea of the South Pole. The two people on the boat, a young male pig with a "pony" and a young female bunny with a well-combed flock of blonde hair in front of her ears, calmly steered it with their wooden paddles, dodging the floating chunks of ice without any problem. Both of them were wearing a set of blue clothes, all of them designed for the cold climate of the South Pole: coats, gloves, jackets, boots, all of them designed to help them survive the snow, but most of all, connecting them to the Southern Water Tribe, a small collection of people living not too far away from them.
The pig and the bunny? Their names are Porky and Lola, and well, they're brother and sister. It's a bit hard to picture it, but trust me, they're siblings. The pig slowly leaned over the ledge of his canoe, looking at the water in front of him. Once he spotted a few fishes swimming around, a prideful grin appeared on his face as he silently stood up, one foot on the ledge of the canoe, and on his hand, a spear. "Oh, it's not e-esc-esca-e-e-esc-getting away from me this time." Porky said to himself, before looking over his shoulder at his uninterested sister, the grin still stamped on his face. "Watch and l-l-learn. This is how you c-c-catch a fish."
Lola rolled her eyes, resting her face on her hand, trying her best to look extremely bored. "Yes. Very exciting." She added as her brother carefully began the long process of catching one single fish. She looked at the side of the boat, watching her reflection (using the chance to adjust her hair by patting it two times), and smiled once she saw a fish, swimming around the area. She took a look at her brother, who was now tapping his chin, trying to figure out what part of the fish to stab, and carefully removed her glove, revealing... another glove, this time a white one. She flexed her muscles and raised her hand in the air, taking a deep breath. Once she opened her eyes, Lola began to make a wavy motion with her wrist, and with a pop, a bubble of water shot up, holding the fish in its center. "Porky, look!"
"Ssshh! L-L-Lola, you're going to s-s-scare him away!" Porky said, his eyes still trained on the poor fish. He licked his lips, wiggling his fingers, not losing sight of the fish. "Oooh, I c-can already smell it c-c-cooking. With a s-side dish of vegetables!"
Lola went back to focusing on the fish, now making circular movements with both her arms. "No, really, Porky! I caught one! How about you actually look instead of just assuming I didn't catch one?"
"P-please, Lola, that's not the w-w-ar-warri-wa-wa-combatant's way." Porky replied, focusing on the fish, just as Lola began to move the floating bubble over to Porky. "We f-f-focus on the moment and—"
POP! Just as Porky was finishing his grand speech, he raised his spear in the air, accidentally bursting the bubble that was right above his head with it. The water and the fish fell right into Porky's head, and the fish even hit Porky in the face with its tail, before jumping into water, blowing the raspberry at him and swimming away. "Ugh!" Porky slumped down on the canoe, glaring at the sea. "Why do t-t-they always d-do that?" He then angrily turned to Lola as he grabbed his warrior's wolf knot and squeezed an unrealistic amount of water out of it. "And you! W-why am I the one that gets wet e-e-everytime you play with your m-m-m-magic water?"
"First of all," Lola said, raising her finger. "It's not m-m-m-magic water, it's called waterbending." She said, leaning forward, this time raising an eyebrow. "And you do know that it's—"
"Y-yeah, yeah, it's an ancient art unique to our c-cul-cult-cu-cul-historical inheritance." Porky replied, shaking his wrist. "I'm just s-saying, that if I had weird magic p-p-p-powers... I'd f-first build a statue, then k-keep the weirdness to myself."
"You're calling me weird?" Lola replied, pointing at her brother. "I'm not the one who has a weird ponytail that doesn't even make sense considering your pink skin!"
"F-f-firstly, it's a warrior's wolf k-k-knot." Porky replied, crossing his arms. "S-second of all, I got this p-pink skin from our f-father's side."
"Porky, that's ridic—" But before Lola could even begin to question why Porky had pink skin and she didn't, even though they were siblings, the universe got in the way as the canoe began to stray into dangerous waters. Dangerously large chunks of ice began to approach the two, some of them at alarming speed. Porky quickly dropped his spear, grabbing the paddle, and did his best to paddle them out of harm's way, while Lola began to shout orders. "Left! Right! Left! Right! Okay, go forward, faster, faster, slower... back it up! A little to the left! A little to the right! Back it up, back it up, back it up, now, frontflip!"
That's when the two finally found themselves floating towards a big chunk of ice, unable to do anything to escape its mighty icy wrath. The siblings jumped off the canoe, Porky quickly grabbing his spear and club before jumping, and they landed on one of the floes, just as their canoe was smashed to smithereens, leaving them all alone, floating astray in a sea of floes, with no chance of escaping.
"... You call that a frontflip?" Lola asked, accusingly, standing up and placing her hands on her hips.
"Oh, y-y-y-you don't like my steering?" Porky replied, standing up and shaking his hands, mimicking his sisters' waterbending moves. "Maybe you should have w-wat-water-w-wat-magically controlled the ice!"
"Oh, so it's my fault now?!" Lola replied, throwing her hands in the air, the water behind her jumping into the air for a moment.
"Like I said before, I should have left you home." Porky replied, crossing his arms and turning around. "Leave to a g-g-gir-gi-female to screw things up!"
Lola's eyes were practically burning with anger after her brother's accusation. "You are the most sexist, immature..." she said, wildly swinging her hands, every movement causing a small crack on an iceberg behind them as Lola's rant got angrier and angrier. "... unlogical, nut brained, unusually hair-obsessed, pink-skinned, excessively stuttering, bad acting..." She raised her hand in the air, causing a bigger crack in the iceberg, one that caught Porky's attention.
"U-uh... L-Lo-Lo-Lola?" Porky said, his eyes widening as he pointed to the iceberg behind them.
"... one-note, very repetitive and all around dumbest person—"
"Pig."
"Sorry- pig in the entire world!" Lola finished, throwing her hands in the air one more time, creating one last crack on the iceberg. "I'm done helping you! From now on, you're on your own!" She said, turning around with an angry glare, only to notice the iceberg, now displaying a split from the base to the top of the iceberg. As the iceberg slowly opens, Porky lets out a squeal, before protectively covering Lola with his arm, as a wave of water comes out of the now-open iceberg, sending them back several feet. Once the wave is gone, Porky looks up, checking to see if they're still alive, if his warrior's wolf knot is still there, and if his sister was fine. "Well, Lola, you've gone from weird to f-fre-f-freak-frea-exquisite."
"I-I did that?" Lola asked, looking at the iceberg behind them, standing up with a very surprised look.
"Yeeeep." Porky said, analysing the iceberg from its base to the top, nodding. "C-c-co-cong-congrat-well done!"
Suddenly, the water beneath them begins to glow a strange brilliant blue. As sbubbles come out of the water, the two siblings cower back from the rim, scrambling back on their feet. Without warning, an enormous iceberg bursts to the surface. Lola gets closer and stares at the iceberg while Porky behind her stretches out his hand as if he wants to hold her back, before throwing his hands in the air and rolling his eyes. There is a figure, a familiar figure, trapped in the ice, sitting with his legs crossed, glowing arrows on his head and hands. Lola looks at the iceberg, then back at her brother, pointing at the figure with his thumb. Porky shakes his head, mouthing a few words (and stuttering them, apparently), before Lola just gives up trying to talk with her brother and walks even closer. The figure ends up being a bunny, a bunny that looked like he had the same age as Lola and Porky (if bunnies and pigs can have the same age). The bunny soon opens his eyes, which also glow, getting another squeal from Porky.
"He's alive!" Lola yells, running back to Porky to grab his club. "We have to help him!"
"Lola!" Porky yells, following her with a spear on his hand. "We d-d-don't even know if it's an him!"
Just as Lola hits the iceberg with the club, trying to help the bunny to get out, a strong just of wind escapes from within the iceberg, sending them both back. The hole she made caused fissures to run over the iceberg, as the cracks opened with a big, dramatic explosion. An incredible and impossible to miss beam of light rockets towards the sky, practically forming a fireworks show that just yells out "HEY GUYS THERE'S STUFF GOING ON HERE."
"Finally!" A voice with an incredibly wet speech impediment yells. "Finally, finally, finally!"
The voice actually belongs to a duck, a black-feathered one, a smile forming on his beaks as he turns to face the rest of the ship he's on. You see, this duck is on a big, mean-looking ship belonging to the big, mean-looking Fire Nation. As he strolls down the bridge of the ship, sporting a nice, just-waxed set of Fire Nation armor, he looks over at the only point of the ship with cover.
Oh yeah, and he also has a big scar on his face, but I can tell you: not important to the plot at all.
"Uncle!" The duck yells as he approaches his uncle, a giant humanoid-looking chicken, wearing Fire Nation robes. The chicken looks up from his game of Foreign Chess, raising an eyebrow at his nephew's exclamation, especially because not only did he grab his attention, the duck also spit all over his face while doing so. "Do you realise what this means?!"
The giant chicken scratched his chin, looking at the big beam of light in the sky. "Well, Prince Daffy, that looks like, I say, that looks like a big beam of light coming out of the South Pole!"
"What?" Prince Daffy asked, raising an eyebrow, and turning around. "No, not that! That!" He said, pointing at a bunch of tiger seals playing with a beach ball. "I've never seen tiger seals so happy! Do you think they're on their mating period?"
Foghorn just glared at Daffy, giving us an aside glance. "No, boy, you don't understand. That big beam of light! Right there!"
Daffy slowly turns around, spotting the beam of light. He looks at Foghorn, then at the beam, then at Foghorn, then at the beam, then at Foghorn. "Seriously, what's up with it? It's been there for five minutes!"
"Don't you think, boy, that has something to do with the Avatar, a person that can bend, I say, bend all four elements, and who you have looked for during the most recent years of your life, while everyone believes that he's been dead for the past one hundred years?" Foghorn asked.
Daffy turned to a side of the ship, glaring at no one in particular."Everybody got that?!" He asked a couple of soldiers that were strolling around the ship. They looked at each other, nodding, and one of them raised their arms. "Yes?"
"Uhm, I thought this was a fishing ship?"
"... how long have you been with us, soldier?" Prince Daffy asked, leaning forward.
"Two years."
Prince Daffy simply raised one eyebrow, before turning around and going back to his uncle. "Uncle, if that is the Avatar, then it means my long search is about to come to an end!" He said, slamming his fist on the table.
Foghorn simply sighed, going back to his game of Foreign Chess. "Or maybe it's just celestial lights? We've been down this road before, Prince Daffy. And last time, you hit your foot going down it, so I don't want you to get excited over nothing." He then smiled, pointing at an empty seat near him. "Please sit. How about a nice cup of calming Jasmine tea?"
"I don't need any calming tea!" Prince Daffy said, raising his hands in the air. "Some orange juice maybe. With a bit of sugar. Diet sugar, because I want to lose weight down here in my hips. But later! Now, I need to capture the Avatar! Helmsman, head a course for the light! Full speed ahead!"
Meanwhile, back in the iceberg, the mist begins to settle, as the beam of light has already disappeared. Porky had protectively clutched Lola, but now that everything had settled down, he reluctantly let go of her, both of them standing up to see what was going on. Porky walks in front of Lola, holding his spear in front of him. Suddenly, a blue figure emerges from the crater of the iceberg.
"S-s-stop!" Porky yells, raising his spear as the figure now stands atop the crater, looking down at the two siblings, causing Lola to marvel in wonder and fear, and Porky to get a semi-headache from all the lights. The circles of light finally die down as the bunny stops glowing, and then suddenly faints. Lola gasps, running forward to catch him before he crashes to the ground, while Porky pokes the bunny's head with the blunt tip of his spear.
"Stop it!" Lola says, waving the spear away.
"Yeah, y-you weren't angry when you t-t-thought he was d-d-dangerous." Porky comments, holding back the spear.
The bunny suddenly opens his gray eyes, gasping in awe as he stares at the Water Tribe bunny, her ears swaying in the wind for dramatic effect. "I-I need to ask you something..." the bunny says in a weak voice, although one can hear a strong New York accent on it.
"What?" Lola asks.
"Please... come closer."
"... Ooookay." Lola replies, coming closer. "What is it?"
The bunny opens his mouth. "Did I take a wrong turn at Albuquerque?" He asks in a clear and happier tone, which causes Lola to raise an eyebrow and Porky's jaw to just drop to the floor. The bunny stands up, revealing his clothes- some sort of orange and yellow monk's outfit that he'll never change for the next months- and looking at everything with a smile. "What's going on here?"
"Y-you tell us!" Porky yells, pointing at the bunny with the spear. "H-how did you get in the ice? And why aren't you f-f-fro-fro-froz-f-fro-solidified?"
The bunny slowly walks over to Porky, lowering the spear with his finger and looking at all the mess he created. "I'm not sure, doc, but no need to point that spear at my face."
At this point, grunts and groans could be heard coming from inside the crater as a giant creature with red-fur, two big eyes, wearing shoes and sporting an arrow similar to the bunny's in his head made his way out. The bunny rushed over, and quickly petted him, even if the creature looked very unusual. "Gossamer! How are you doing?!"
The creature responds by licking him with his giant tongue. "Ha! You're fine."
"W-w-what is that thing?!" Porky asked in a high-pitched voice.
"This is Gossamer, my flying..." The bunny looked at Gossamer, then shrugged. "... Gossamer."
"Yes." Porky nodded, pointing at Lola. "And this is Lola, my f-flying sister."
"Don't make promises you can't keep, Porky." Lola said, raising her hands.
Gossamer looked at Porky with the glare that could pierce through a thousand souls. He leaned forward, opening his mouth, and sneezed, sending a blast of mucus that conveniently only hits Porky.
"Eehh... don't worry." The bunny said, raising his finger with a shy grin. "It'll wash off."
Lola covered her mouth in disgust as the bunny turned to her, smiling. "So, do you guys live around here?"
Porky points the spear once more at the bunny. "Dd-d-d-don't answer that! Did you see that c-crazy bolt of light? He was p-p-p-probably trying to w-warn the Fire Navy!"
"Oh yeah, I'm sure he's a spy for the Fire Navy." Lola said, rolling her eyes and pushing the spear away. "You can tell by that evil look in his eye." She said, pointing with her thumb at the bunny, who had found a carrot inside his outfit and was now munching on it, sending an uninterested look in Porky's direction. "This one's my brother, Porky. He's a bit paranoid."
"I can tell." The bunny commented as Porky did the I'm watching you motion several times. "I'm a... a... ACHOO!" The bunny sneezed, creating an air blast that sent him flying into the air. He lands on the ground with no problems, scratching his nose. "Bugs Bunny. Yeah, I have a surname."
Porky's jaw was on the floor once more. "You just sneezed." He said, and pointed at the sky. "And flew ten feet in the air?"
"Kinda improbable, since your name begins with B." Lola said. "You're an airbender!"
"Yeah... airbender." Bugs said, nodding. "Let's go with that."
"Giant l-light beams, flying b-b-bison, airb-b-bender..." Porky said to himself, walking in circles. "I think I g-got the m-m-m-m-midnight sun m-m-m-madness. I'm going home where I-I'm not the b-b-butt of every joke." He said, turning around and taking a step forward, promptly falling into the sea. He quickly got back on the ice, quickly hugging Lola for body heat.
"If you guys have no way to get back, Gossamer and I can give you all a lift!" Bugs said, pointing at his red-colored furry friend.
"Oh! I'd love a ride!" Lola said, running to the side of the bison. Porky, shrugged, following Lola, who looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Aren't you going to complain?"
"And r-r-risk staying here and f-f-freeze to death?" Porky replied, rolling his eyes. "N-n-no way, sister." The two siblings quickly climb on the bison, sitting on the saddle , with Porky clearly not excited for what's about to come, playing with Bugs' little staff that he had left in the saddle, while Lola was practically overflowing with anticipation.
"Alright, first-time flyers, hold on!" Bugs said, whipping the reins, as Gossamer growls in response. "Gossamer, yep-yep!" He yells, turning to no one in particular. "You see, we changed a letter, so we're original."
Gossamer takes a huge jump in the air, his shoes giving him the strength he needs, soaring through the air like a majestic eagle or Michael Jordan at a basketball game in a very "eh" movie with Bill Murray, who was obviously doing it for the money, before belly flopping into the water with a splash, before trudging through the water very slowly:
"W-wow, that was truly amazing." Porky said, sarcastically (like you even needed someone to point that out).
"Erhm... Gossamer's just a little tired. A little rest, some carrot juice, a nice massage and he'll be soaring through the skies." Bugs said, looking down at his pet, before turning back to Lola, who had given her brother an angry glance. She smiles at him, and Bugs smiles back. And he keeps on smiling.
Lola's smile slowly disappears as she raises an eyebrow. "Why are you smiling at me like that?"
Bugs continues to smile, before shaking his head. "Uh? Me, smiling? No, my... facial features just... froze. For a second. They're back now." He said, turning back to his reigns, and shaking his head. "Mental note: be more subtle."
"W-w-we can still hear you, buddy." Porky said from the back of the saddle.
Back at the Fire Nation ship, the sun had already set, and Prince Daffy was still standing on the bridge, staring at the distance, his fingers twitching, just thinking about getting the chance to finally grab that Avatar. Uncle Foghorn approached him, stretching his arms, and letting out a long yawn. "Well, I'm going to bed now, boy." He said, looking at Prince Daffy, who didn't respond. "A man needs, I say, a man needs his rest." He said once more, waiting for a response. "Prince Daffy, you need to rest. Even if you're right, and the Avatar is alive, you won't find him. I know this sounds completely disheartening, very cruel considering recent events and will seem very out-of-character in the future, but, you won't find him. Your father, your grandfather and your great-grandfather all tried and failed."
"That's because their honor didn't hinge on the Avatar's capture. Mine does." Prince Daffy replied, turning to face his uncle. "The coward's hundred years of hiding are over. HONOR! HONOR! HONOR! HONOR! It's all about the honor, baby!"
And back to Gossamer (get used to this folks), the entire group was now asleep. Porky, of course, was sleeping in some crazy way designed to get in cheap laughs, while Bugs was just about falling asleep before Lola crawled towards him, resting her head on the ledge of the saddle.
"Hey." She said, looking down at the bunny.
"Hey." Bugs replied, not even looking up. "What are you thinking about?"
"Weird question considering the fact we just met," Lola said, before smiling back, "but I guess I was wondering, you being an airbender and all, if you had any idea what happened to the Avatar?"
"Oh, no." Bugs replied, scratching the back of his head. "I didn't know him. I mean, I knew people who knew him. And they said he was a pretty cool guy. Pretty good-looking too. They said that his eyes reflected the sunlight like the seas of the Fire Nation... but I didn't know him. Sorry."
"Okay. Just curious." She said, slanting her eyes in disappointment. "Although that does beg the question: why hasn't a Water Tribe Avatar been born? If the Air Nomads' Avatar is gone, then the cycle goes o—"
"Go to sleep, Lola." Bugs said, glaring at her.
"Oh, right. Good night." She said, before crawling back to her brother's side to sleep.
Bugs turns around to get in a comfortable place to sleep, before looking at the horizon with guilt. "I'm conflicted." He said, to no one in particular, before drifting off to sleep, entering a land of confused dreams and flashbacks which we won't explain until a later episode. A daring escape, as Gossamer and Bugs fly through the trembling skies, in the middle of a storm. A cry for help, as the rain and thunder causes them to fall, sinking down into the water. A deus ex machina being set up, as Bugs' tattoo and eyes glow, creating an air bubble around Gossamer and him, followed by a voice, a voice echoing through his dreams, waking him up from the memories…
"Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs." Lola continued, repeating the same word all over again, in a monotone, all while having a bored-out-of-her-mind expression on her face. "Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs."
Bugs shoots up, gasping for air. "I didn't do it! He forced me to do it! The butler did it!"
"Bugs! It's fine! We're in the village now." She said, pointing at the area around her. Indeed, they were now inside a hut. Bugs looked at himself and realized someone had removed his clothes. He gasped, taking a look at Lola, and then shook his head before nodding. "Everyone's waiting to meet you."
"Riiiight." Bugs said, standing up as he started to get dressed. "Give me just a second, I'll be right out."
Lola nodded, getting ready to step outside, but stopping for a moment to marvel at the blue arrow tattoos covering most of the bunny's body. What do they mean? Why were they there? She never got her answers, as Bugs finished getting dressed and walked out of the hut, holding his staff one hand and Lola's hand in the other. As they stepped outside, Bugs got to see wonderfully big Southern Water Tribe: a couple of huts and an igloo. He looked at everything with a raised eyebrow, before going "eh" and walking up to the group of people, both old and new. "Bugs, this is the entire village. Entire village, Bugs." Lola said, pointing to the group of people, who were cowering away in fear even after he bowed respectfully.
"Why are they scared of me?" Bugs asked, pointing at them while looking at Lola. "Did Gossamer try to dissect me with his acids once more?"
"Well, no one has seen an Airbender in a hundred years." Said a particularly old woman with gray hair, a piece of string around her neck missing a locket, and big Southern Water Tribe clothes. "We thought you were extinct, until my granddaughter and grandson found you."
There was silence as Bugs' eyes widened, and one could feel him lacking the words for this situation. "E-extinct?" He asked in disbelief.
"Bugs, this is Granny." Lola said, gesturing towards the elderly woman.
"Call me Gran Gran." She said, waving at him while twiddling her fingers.
Porky, meanwhile, walked up to the group after sharpening his boomerang. He picks up Bugs' staff, a relatively easy task considering the Airbender was still pretty shocked after the news delivered by Gran Gran. "What is this, a w-wea-we-weap-wea-mechanism for self-defense? You can't s-s-stab anything with this!" He said, poking Bugs with the staff.
Bugs shaked his head, grabbing the staff from Porky's hand. "It's not for stabbing, doc, it's for airbending!" He said, opening his staff into a glider, an act that made Porky gasp in fright. The villagers responded with "oohs" and "aahs", which prompted Bugs to start an airbending demonstration, which included flying, making air slashes and doing loops in the air before crashing into the village's watchtower, causing it to crumble, an act made easy by the fact the watchtower was made out of snow. As Bugs lazily stood up, cleaning the snow from his clothes- and wondering who would be stupid enough to make a watchtower out of snow when your enemies could control fire- Porky ran over to the watchtower, completely shocked. "My w-w-w-watchtower!" He yelled.
"That was amazing!" Lola said, running up to Bugs followed by the village's kids, all of them clapping and trying to grab Bugs' leg.
"Well, gee, thanks, doc." Bugs said, scratching the back of his head.
"F-f-fantastic!" Porky said from the mound of snow that was once a watchtower. "You're an airbender, Lola's a waterbender. Together you c-c—can just waste time a-a-all day long! I'm just going to leave before a-a-anything screwy happens." He said, stalking off before a bunch of snow fell on him out of nowhere.
"You're a waterbender?" Bugs asked surprised.
"Well, sort of. Not yet." Lola said, crossing her arms.
"Alright, no more playing." Granny said, walking up to Lola and Bugs. "Come on, Lola, you have chores."
Once the two were far away from Bugs- who know had to deal with crazy villagers wanting to know more about him- Lola huddled near to her grandmother:
"I told you, he's the real thing Granny!" Lola said, clenching her fist. "I finally found a bender to teach me!"
"Don't put all your hopes in this boy, Lola." Granny said, shaking her head.
"But he's special, I can tell!" She said, closing her eyes. "I sense he's filled with much wisdom."
Lola opens her eyes again and sees Bugs placing his tongue on his staff. He raises his eyebrows in a cartoony way. "Comedic moment to set up mood-changing shot!" He said as the kids smiled, huddling all around him and asking for more tricks.
Back in the Fire Nation ship, Prince Daffy, now using much more normal Fire Nation clothes, instead of the clunky armor, panted as he maintained a firebending stance, glaring at two soldiers in front of him. From a chair, Uncle Foghorn watched everything while drinking tea. He sighed, shaking his head. "Again." He said, with a stern tone, and the fight began once more, as Daffy takes the first move by spreading his arms directly at the two soldiers, showering them in flames.
The adversaries easily block Daffy's attack, and he replied by shooting multiple blasts from his feet and arms. "CHOREOGRAPHY! IS! EASY! IN! ANIMATION!" he yelled after every successful attack. He jumped, managing to dodge another fire blast from his adversaries, and landed on the ground, ready to attack once more, but his uncle stood up, marching towards him.
"No!" He yelled once he approached his nephew, who lowered his arms, looking at his uncle. "Boy, power in firebending comes from the breath, I say, from the breath, not from the muscles!" He then stretched his arm. "If you want to unrealistically shoot fire out of your hands like a real man, your breath has to become energy in your body! The energy extends past your limbs and becomes: fire!" He yelled, directing a fire blast at his nephew that evaporates just before hitting him. "Now see there, boy, I could have given you another scar to prove a point, but I preferred to just scare you out of your pants! Get it right this time."
Prince Daffy shook his head, throwing his hands up in the air. "Enough! I've been on this stupid sequence all day! Teach me the next set! I'm more than ready!"
"No, you are impatient, you still have yet to pose a real threat, and your redemption arc is three seasons, I say, three seasons away!" Foghorn said, shaking his head as he sat down once more. "Drill again!"
Daffy clenched his teeth in anger. He turned towards a soldier, screaming as volumes of spit come out of his mouth, blinding the soldier for a moment, allowing Daffy the chance to successfully attack one of the soldiers with a fire blast. "The sages tell us the Avatar is the last airbender, trademark Nickelodeon!" He said as Foghorn's expression changed from one of interest to disappointment. "He should over a hundred years old by now. He's had a century to master the four elements! That way, when he defeats me, it'll be because he's too good, and not because I suck at capturing twelve-year olds who have been frozen for a hundred years! You will teach me the advanced set!"
Foghorn sighed. "Very well." He said on a dire tone, reluctantly conceding. "But first, I must finish my comically oversized meal!" He smiled, turning back to a roasted duck that showed out of nowhere. "See? We're not all that evil! Because we're eating."
Back in the Southern Water Tribe, Porky stood in front of his destroyed watchtower, holding his club proudly in the air. "N-now you s-see, men, it's important that you show n-n-no fear when you face a firebender! In the W-W-Water Tribe, we fight to the last man standing! For w-w-without courage, how can we call ourselves men?!" He said, raising his club in the air, waiting for a cheer from his audience: a group of six, uninterested, little boys.
"I gotta go pee!" One of the little boys exclaimed after raising his hand.
"Listen!" Porky yelled, gritting his teeth. "Until your fathers return from the W-W-War, they're counting on you, all of you, to be the new men of this tribe, and that means no i-i-i-interrupting my lore exposition for potty humor!"
"But I really gotta go!" The little boy repeated, setting up the punchline.
".. alright." Porky muttered, sighing. "W-w-w-who else has to go?"
All the kids raise their hands and leave, leaving Porky to bury his face on his hands, all by himself. "T-t-t-the things I gotta do to get some d-d-decent character development..."
Before he could mull over his current situation any more, Lola ran up to him, a frown on her face. "Listen, Porky... have you seen Bugs?" The two then looked at the igloo used as a bathroom, watching as Bugs left it, zipping his pants up a bit higher. "Wow!" He said, grinning. "Everything freezes in there!" A bunch of kids laughed with him right after that, leaving Porky to look at the situation in despair.
"I don't get it." Porky said. "W-w-w-why does he says that and g-g-gets character d-development in tem m-m-minutes, and I h-have to wait an entire season?"
Lola's eyes widened. "Is he eating a carrot without having washed his hands?"
"STOP IT!" Porky yelled, running up to Bugs, who was still munching on a carrot. "What's wrong with you?! We don't have time for games with the War going on!"
"Eeeh... what war, doc?"
"... You're k-kidding, right." Porky asked, glaring at the young bunny.
"PENGUIN!" Bugs immediately ran away from Porky, approaching a penguin not too far away from them.
"He's k-kidding, right?" Porky asked once more, the silence being the siblings' only answer.
A few minutes later, and by few we mean around thirty, Bugs was still busy trying to catch penguins. "Hey, come on little guy. Wanna go sledding?" He asked one of the penguins, who tapped his chin, tapped his foot, wrote his number on a paper and gave it to Bugs, who fell belly first on the snow.
"Bugs?" Lola asked, approaching the penguin field. She soon spots Bugs, who stands up, cleaning himself of any snow.
"I have a way with animals." Bugs said, grinning proudly. "Probably because I am one. Wanna help me catch one?"
"I'll do that, Bugs." Lola said, giggling at the airbender's antics. "But for a deal. I help you to catch a penguin, and you teach me waterbending."
Bugs replied with a "nuh-uh sister" glare. "That seems like the most unfair deal of all time, Lola." He said, shaking his head. "You want to exchange a long-time, possibly exhausting service for a simple ten to twenty minutes of entertainment? I thought you were better, Lola. I thought you were better... also, I can't waterbend. Isn't there someone on your tribe who can teach you?"
Lola sighed. "No. You're looking at the only waterbender and coffee maker in the Southern Water Tribe."
Bugs raised an eyebrow. "This isn't right, Lola. A waterbender needs a water master... what about the North Pole? There's another Water Tribe up there, right? Maybe they have waterbenders that can teach you."
"Well, maybe." Lola said. "But we haven't had contact with them for a long time. It's not like it's the second star to the right. They're an entire world away."
"Oh, but you forget, I have a flying Gossamer." Bugs said, raising his hands in the air. "It's ours, Lola! I've got a flying twinkle in my eye! Uhm, sorry. Just had that stuck in my throat for a long time. Lola, me and Gossamer, we can fly you to the North Pole and get you a water master!"
"That's..." Lola began, but couldn't find the words to complete. "Huh. I just... I just never had that chance. I... never really left home before."
"Well, you think about it, but in the meantime, how about a lighthearted sequence to prepare for a wham moment?" Bugs asked as the two ran off into the snowy fields, ready to catch some penguins.
"This is light-hearted!" Both yelled as they collected penguins, doing all sorts of crazy antics along the way. "We're having real fun!" Both yelled once more as they finally managed to get on top of the penguins and sled their way down a giant hill. "Nothing could bring us down!" They yelled once more, before finally coming to a stop near a Fire Nation shipwreck. Bugs gets off his ride, walking over to it, looking at the amazing shipwreck in awe. "Woah! What's that?"
"A Fire Navy ship." Lola said as she let her penguin go and approached Bugs, suddenly adopting a darker tone. "And a very bad memory for my people. Emphasis on the italic bad." Bugs shrugged, walking towards the ship, still looking at it in awe. "Wait, Bugs, no!" Lola yelled. "We're not allowed to go near it! The ship could be booby-trapped."
"If you want to become a great bender, you have to let go of fear." Bugs said.
"Where did you get that from?" Lola asked, raising an eyebrow.
"The great big book of just get on the ship, Lola." Bugs replied, rolling his eyes as Lola followed him. The two ventured closer toward the ship, and Bugs helped Lola to climb some of the blocks of ice that lay beside the ship. They crawled through a hole in the hull of the ship, and were soon walking through the silent rooms of the shipwreck, as some white hamsters roamed the otherwise deserted ship. Bugs silently entered a room stocked to the rim with weapons.
"This ship has haunted my tribe ever since Granny was a little girl." Lola said, analysing the dead hallways in silence. "It was part of the Fire Nation's first attacks."
There was the sound of a record scratch, and we can see Bugs holding the record in a record player, his eyes widened. "Okay, back up. I have friends all over the world, even in the Fire Nation. I've never seen any war."
Lola just stared at Bugs with a surprised look, as pieces of the puzzle began to come together in my mind. "Bugs... how long were you in that iceberg?"
"Couple of days, I suppose."
"I think it was more like a hundred years!"
"WHAT?!" Bugs yelled, taking a step back and shaking his head. "That's impossible! Do I look like a hundred and twelve-year-old man to you?! Plus, it would make our relationship just too creepy-"
"Think about it. The War is a century old. You don't know about it because, somehow, you were in there for a hundred years! It's the only explanation!" Bugs reaction to this revelation was one of comprehension. Still wanting to believe Lola was just playing some sick prank on him, the bunny takes a step back, leaning against a wall, before slumping to the floor in shock.
"A... hundred years?" He repeated to himself. "I can't believe it. I can't believe it."
Lola approached him, squatting besides the frightened bunny. "I'm sorry, Bugs. Maybe there's a bright side to all this."
Bugs nodded, a smile appearing on his face even after learning the sad truth behind him being frozen on the iceberg. "I did get to meet you."
"That was unsubtle and way too obvious." Lola said, shaking her head, but her disapproving look is soon replaced with a warm smile. "Come on, let's get out of here." She pulls him to his feet as the two begin to exit the shipwreck. "Bugs, let's get back, this place is creepy."
"You already said that five seconds ago, just in different words." Bugs said, turning back to face Lola, not noticing as he tripped over a thin rope, barring the entrance, thus trapping them. "What was that you said about booby traps?"
"Oh, I said the ship could be booby-trapped. Which means I can say, with pride: I told you so!" Lola replied, tapping her chin to remember the exact gears and engines of the shipwreck begin to power up and function. In shock, Bugs and Lola followed the movements of the machines until suddenly, a flare was fired. Silence fills the air, until the sound of the flare exploding on the sky could be heard.
"Hold on tight!" Bugs said, taking a surprised Lola in his arms and flying out of the ship through a hole in the ceiling, all with the help of enhanced airbending jumps. "How convenient of them to install a hole right on the roof of the booby-trapped room, eh?"
But unbeknownst to them, another person observed their activities from afar. Prince Daffy peered through his telescope, following every movement the duo makes as Bugs, still holding Lola, jumps down the side of the ship. "The last airbender!" He yells, his grip on the telescope tightening as the duo walks away. "Quite agile for his old age..." He then turned around, marching to one of the soldiers on the bridge. "Wake my uncle! Tell him I found the Avatar!" The soldier nods as Prince Daffy returns to his telescope, observing as the duo approach the Southern Water Tribe. "As well as his hiding place..." He said, smiling to himself, as the S.S First Impressions sailed through the seas, ready to get its entire staff's butt kicked by a twelve-year-old body.
To be Continued!
Next Chapter: The Avatar Retoirns
(Get it? Cause Bugs' has na accent. And it sounds like that when he says it. Ooooh, genius!)