This story contains graphic descriptions of incest. Do not read if it makes you uncomfortable.

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Gareda Psychological Services, LTD - Therapist James Finnigan - Session 20 November 4, 2015 - Norma Bates

'You ready?' James asked setting the recorder off to the side on his desk. 'Remember it's not really there. Just speak freely.'

I was trying to tell him about my dad. I could go another 30 sessions on my father.

'Norma,' he said trying to keep the frustration from his voice. "Although, most trauma is rooted in the past. Yours included. I get the feeling like there are things in your present you don't want to talk about."

I clutched the handle of my purse tightly as it sat on my lap. I was still wearing my blue wool trench coat ready to flee at any moment. I needed to go in order. It's too easy to judge someone if you don't know the history.

'You called me because you were scared for your sons. What you might do to them?" He said folding his hands on his desk. 'Why don't you tell me why? We can decide together if afterwards you need to revisit your past.'

I felt trapped like an elephant caught in a snare like the kind in the documentaries that Norman made me watch. I searched the room for away out. But there were only rows upon rows of medical books. Something in them must mean that he will help me. So I allowed the memories to flow over me as if they just happened.

I heard him first. On the stairs. Everything he does is so harsh and deliberate. He's nothing like Norman whose soft and gentle and just seems to glide around a room. I have really old stairs that creak. When Norman walks up them, nothing, he's as stealthy as a cat. But Dylan, no I heard him coming.

'Dylan and Norman? These are your sons?' He asked adjusting the collar on his navy blue suit.

He might as well have asked me are these your bombs. I stared unflinchingly at the silver wedding band on his hand before nodding my head.

'Go on.'

I tried to recall what had happened next. Nothing was more distinctive than the smell. He walked into the room and his clothes smelled of. I paused fear kept me from finishing what I wanted to say.

'Everything you say to me is confidential, Norma,' he said gazing behind her at the clock on the wall.

I leaned over and whispered that his clothes smelled of the plant weed. Of course I never questioned him about it. I didn't even want to move. Just stared face down on the bed staring at the carpet. I felt defeated, unwanted.

He nodded.

My hair was a mess then and I cringed remembering as I unconsciously touched my hair before snapping my hand away. I looked like I hadn't changed my clothes in days. I'm sure the room didn't smell pretty either. 'He doesn't . . .he doesn't love me.' I managed to say through my tears.

Dylan casted off his leather jacket over the chair in my room. He tried to plead with me to see reason I guess. 'He's your son. He will always love you. Norma he can't love you the way you want.'

But what did he know about it? What was he even talking about? I screamed at him pulling myself out of bed.

He grimaced as he caught sight of me asking me if i'd eaten anything.

I just hadn't had an appetite.

'Do you normally stop eating in stressful situations?' James asked.

I stared at the grey frayed carpet knowing that alcohol was my abuse of choice. After all, it ran in the family. But this time I wanted to waste away without Norman. I simply replied no.

'Okay, just concerned. Go on.'

He tossed off his shoes and charged towards me picking me up over his shoulders. I squealed and balled up my fists and hit him on his back.

He tossed me in the shower and pulled off my blue and white robe. Exposing my white negligee underneath. I was to stunned to put up a fight. A fact that wore off quickly as soon as he turned the hot water on. I pushed him and scratched at his skin. He hopped into the shower with me, pushing me under the water. I think I yelled stop a couple of times.

'A couple?' James smirked.

I had to admit that there was more than just a few obscenities mixed in with the word stop.

I gasped under the shock of the water, running my hands through my wet hair. I was just worried about being alone with no one to love me.

But he let me know that he loved me too. He didn't understand how I could believe that only Norman cared. He tightened his grip on my wrists as I fought against him with renewed fervor. He was practically holding me up against him.

My tears mixing in with the water. I could barely hear him. He doesn't really understand my relationship with Norman anyway.

'He started saying things like touching you the way he does is wrong. Looking at you the way he does is wrong," she mimicked in his stern voice. I refused to look at him or listen to his hateful words.

'But apart of you knows he's right?' James asked more as a question than a statement.

'Oh to well. That's all that plays in my head about Norman, but I cant hear those words from Dylan. Not him,' I said avoiding eye contact with the doctor as my voice wavered.

'Things changed after that didnt they?'

His hands slipped on the wet fabric that was starting to cling to my body touching my butt instead. He recoiled as if stung by a bee.

But it was already too late. We both appeared to be frozen by surprise and arousal. My pink nipples pushing against the wet satin fabric. The wet gown illuminating my smooth skin like the statue of David. If it had been anyone else I might have lifted that garment over my head and kissed him until I couldn't breath. My eyes drifted down to the zipper of his jeans where I could see his member straining to be released.

I paused tossing my purse on the chair beside me and stood up shrugging off my jacket and walking it over to the coat hanger. It was getting to be a bit warm in this office. As I began my story again.

Dylan was hesitating I knew the only thing he wanted was to get out of the bathroom. So I told him not to go.

He said my name like a whisper. 'Norma.'

I paid no heed my soft lips skipping across his neck.

'Norma.'

I pleaded with him to just make the pain go away.

'Mom.'

I heard the name like a freight train rushing at me. He never calls me mom.

He pushed me away. My back hit the wall of the shower hard. I don't think he meant to hurt me, but I grimaced as silent tears rolled down my face. I told him that all I felt was pain now and there was nothing he could do to hurt me.

'He stared at me for the longest moment the wheels in his little head turning,' I said making a circular motion with both hands on the side of my face.

He brushed his lips across mines as softly as a feather. As if he was afraid if he did anything more he might break me as if I was some porcelain doll.

I reversed our positions pushing him against the wall and raised up his black t-shirt and discarded it to the side. Planting butterfly kisses along his collar bone. He pulled me away just enough to take my lips in his in a flurry of passionate kisses. Chasing all thought of Norman from my mind.

He lifted my right leg up; my nightgown bunched around my waist revealing my white panties with pink flowers on them. I pushed myself against his erection feeling the wetness gathering between my legs as I moaned into his lips. The hot water caressing my back. I released an inaudible gasp as he picked me up. My legs wrapping instinctually around his waist as his hips seemed to move in tandem with mines.

I gave a choked moan pressing against him and begged for more.

He released me and stepped back as he unzipped his pants and tossed them on the floor. I should be disgusted with myself, and apart of me was, but I was also in awe of this beautiful creature standing in front of me.

He kissed me, this time it was more persistent as if he was sure of himself as he nibbled on my bottom lip. I giggled feeling nothing but sheer joy and pleasure. He returned a smile of his own as his hand traveled down my stomach to probe my sweet spot. I pushed against his two fingers wanting more and more of the pleasure that was building up.

Dylan, please I begged.

He smirked as if he already knew what I wanted and he was perfectly content with making me wait for it. I closed my eyes savoring every moment. I felt his fingers leave me and I illicted a whimper as my body had already begun to miss him. This time his hands were on my butt lifting me into the air once more as the tip of his cock plunged deeper into my tightness.

I opened my eyes and stared deeply into his as if to say it should have been him all along. I even lost sight of what had even brought us together in the first place as I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on tightly. His tongue caressing the soft part of my neck that always managed to send me spiraling over the edge as he thrust in and out.

Dylan! I cried a deep need in my voice that threatened to topple me over. My muscles clenched tightly around his waist as he inhaled a sharp breath. He thrusted faster his intense groans threatening to drown out my ever more desperate moans.

I felt him shudder as my muscles clenched and we came clutching on to each other for dear life. I let the little ripples of pleasure wash over me as I closed my eyes and allowed my head to lul to the side resting on his shoulder. He was breathing heavily, but neither of us moved. Letting the moment rest between us. I wanted to do it again.

I cant even remember how many times I called out his name.

He eased out of me and put me down. His cum traveling down my leg and being washed away by the water.

'Mom, I can't,' he said to me the hurt in his voice. He stepped out of the water and began picking up his clothes.

Oh, honey. I'm sorry is the only thing I could manage to say. I watched him leave and I collapsed in the shower and just wept. My knees clutched to my chest. 'Just, I'm sorry.'

'Norma, I need you to listen carefully and answer my question truthfully?' He stated leaning forward in his chair. His elbows digging into the wood of his desk. "How old are your children?"

I laughed in his face annoyed by the question. 'Dylans 22 and Norman's 18. Coming here was obviously a mistake.' I stood up and grabbed my purse in a huff.

'I'm a mandated reporter of child abuse. I had to ask,' he said standing up.

I gathered my coat and threw it over my shoulders. 'Asked and answered.'

"Your kids may be of legal age, but you wouldn't be here if you thought you were doing the right thing. Come back let me help you stop," he pleaded.

Authors Note: Unlike in the show Norma has no sexual relationship with her therapist. Believe it or not Bates Motel is set in modern times although it has that feel of the 50's and 60's hints the date on the timeline.