Chapter 1 - Effortless

"Hey Bree, wanna come out to dinner with me and Beca?" Chloe asked as she passed by Aubrey's bedroom door.

"Thanks, but Stacie is going to come over and watch a movie in a little bit. We're ordering pizza."

"Okay, cool," Chloe said. She turned to leave but hesitated at the door a second.

"Spit it out."

"This is like your third time hanging out alone with Stacie in the past couple weeks. Is there something going on there?" Chloe smiled and wiggled her eyebrows.

"No! We're just friends. And, jesus Chloe, you hang out with Beca every day - is there something going on there?" Aubrey realized this was a stupid comparison almost as soon as she said it because of course there was something going on with her and Beca, they just didn't know it yet.

"Point taken. Fine, have fun watching your movie. I'll try to stay out extra late for you," Chloe winked.

"Shut up," Aubrey said as she rolled her eyes.

"So what movie did you have in mind for tonight?" Stacie asked as she plopped herself down on the couch and got comfortable.

"I was gonna let you pick this time."

"What?"

"You pick."

"No way! Where is my Aubrey and what have you done with her?"

Aubrey laughed, ignoring the small jolt in her stomach at the words 'my Aubrey.' "Shut up, it's only because I can't decide what mood I'm in and it'll be easier to have someone else pick."

"So, let me get this straight, I can pick out any movie and you will watch it with me?"

"Yes. Pick out whatever you want."

"You are so going to regret this," Stacie said as she grabbed the computer to scroll through their Netflix options. After a bit of searching, Stacie sat back with a satisfied grin.

"So, what are we watching?"

"The Exorcist." Aubrey froze.

"No way, not uh. Do not want. No." Aubrey shook her head vigorously.

"You said you would watch any movie with me!"

"I don't do scary movies, okay? I can't."

Stacie waved her off. "Oh, you'll be fine. I'll be here. You are watching this movie with me, Posen. And next time maybe you'll think twice before giving me the power to pick." Aubrey slumped back on the couch and crossed her arms, defeated.

"You are very adorable when you pout," Stacie teased as she lightly pinched Aubrey's cheek.

Aubrey tried to cover her blush by standing up and stomping to the other side of the room in mock protest. She grabbed her phone. "I'm ordering the pizza - half cheese, half pepperoni and mushroom?"

"You know it, boring cheese girl."

This is why Aubrey loved hanging out with Stacie. It was so easy, she never had to think about what to say or pretend to be anything she wasn't. Stacie would see right through her if she tried to pretend anyway. She didn't feel so uptight when Stacie was around. Stacie felt the same way about hanging out with Aubrey. It just seemed.. effortless.

Except lately they were both feeling like it wasn't as effortless as they initially thought. Sure, it was easy to be themselves and, sure, there was pretty much no where each of them would rather be than in each other's company... But it took Stacie a lot of effort not to stare too intently into Aubrey's eyes when she was speaking passionately about something. It took a lot of effort for Aubrey to keep a safe, 'friendly' distance. And, increasingly, it took a lot of effort to make sure their playfulness with each other didn't turn into full on flirting.

Stacie turned off all the lights because apparently scary movies must be watched in the dark. She curled up next to Aubrey on the couch, almost touching but not quite. The movie began and each girl got engrossed in the film. Aubrey was thoroughly creeped out by the movie right from the start.

A half hour into the film, a knock on the door made Aubrey jump and grab Stacie's hand. She quickly dropped it and blushed, both girls laughing it off a little nervously. Aubrey made her way to the door and paid for their pizza. They ate their pizza quietly as they continued the movie. Aubrey could sense Stacie looking over at her every once in awhile but she assumed it was to gauge her reaction to the movie and nothing more.

Aubrey was at the dry erase board with Chloe just before rehearsals the next day when Stacie sauntered up to them. She looked at Aubrey with a little smirk on her face. "You look like you didn't get much sleep last night, Bree," she said teasingly with a wink.

Aubrey saw Chloe's eyes widen in response and she shot her a death glare. "She made me watch a scary movie," she said to Chloe pointedly. She turned to Stacie. "It's never fun to be on the receiving end of my revenge plans."

"That's definitely true. I can totally attest to that," Chloe chirped.

Stacie laughed. "Bring it on, Posen." Aubrey watched her turn and walk back to her usual pre-rehearsal spot on the bleachers.

Every time Stacie got to rehearsal early, or there was downtime in the middle of rehearsal, she took out the same thick, black journal-type notebook and began writing. It wasn't a constant stream of writing, Aubrey noticed, more like a quick jot and a lot of contemplating. She thought it was so cute when Stacie lightly chewed on the eraser at the end of her pencil. Aubrey wondered what she wrote in there but hadn't had the opportunity to ask.

Aubrey also wondered where Stacie disappeared to immediately after every rehearsal. She never stuck around but Aubrey didn't think she went back to her room either. She would normally just ask if she was curious but for some reason, she felt that Stacie wanted to keep whatever she was doing private or she would have mentioned it herself. Maybe, Aubrey's stomach clenched a little at the thought, she was meeting someone every day after rehearsals. Aubrey knew Stacie was a bit sexually promiscuous but Stacie hadn't mentioned anything or anyone in a few weeks at least. Aubrey just assumed that Stacie would tell her but maybe not.

Aubrey decided it was silly not to ask Stacie things she was curious about. Stacie is her friend and it shouldn't matter. The brunette was engrossed in her work when Aubrey approached quietly. "What do you write about in there?" Stacie startled with a yelp, quickly shutting the notebook and shoving it into her bag.

"Oh, that? It's nothing, really. Just little thoughts." Aubrey wasn't used to seeing Stacie on edge about anything.

"Like a diary?"

"What? No. Well - I don't know. I guess, maybe, sort of something like that?"

"Oh. Okay." Aubrey was a bit hurt that Stacie didn't seem to want her to know about it. It wasn't like Aubrey was trying to read it, she would never, but it seemed Stacie didn't even want her to know about it at all.

Stacie could read the hurt in Aubrey's eyes even though the blonde kept them downcast. "I write songs," Stacie said quietly. Aubrey's eyes shot up to Stacie's. "It's just - I don't know. It's sort of like a diary in that way. All my feelings go into lyrics. I've been writing songs since I was a little girl." Stacie looked away and Aubrey could tell she wasn't used to telling people this about herself.

"Wow, that's really amazing, actually." Aubrey watched Stacie's face redden a little. "What do you do about music? I've never really understood how songwriting works."

"I make the music too." Aubrey's eyes widened.

"So, you make actual songs, then? Do you perform any? Have you recorded any? Can I hear one?"

"No, absolutely not." Stacie waved her firmly between them as she stood up, effectively ending the conversation and making it known that she did not want it brought up again.

Aubrey tried to catch Stacie after rehearsal but as usual, the brunette had disappeared before Aubrey even had the chance to look for her. Aubrey wasn't about to approach Stacie about where she jets off to, not after the girl's reaction to the writing thing. She thought maybe it would be best to just wait for Stacie to mention it herself if she wants to. Or, Aubrey's mind started working, she could find out where Stacie goes without Stacie knowing. She wondered how hard it would be to follow Stacie after rehearsals one day.

Aubrey wasn't going to have a chance to try to follow Stacie after rehearsals the next day because she and Chloe were having all the girls over for a get-together and she needed to go home and make sure the house was ready.

"Chloe, how much alcohol do you think these girls are going to drink?" She surveyed the large amount of alcohol that was taking over their kitchen counter space.

"I don't know! I wanted to make sure everyone had something that suits their tastes." That statement was probably the epitome of Chloe, always trying to make sure everyone had everything they needed to be the happiest they could be.

Aubrey finished putting out various snacks when the doorbell rang. The girls streamed in fairly consistently until almost everyone was present - except Stacie. Aubrey tried not to think about it but she knew she would be disappointed if the brunette didn't show. Aubrey went into the kitchen and scanned her drink options. Amy had already set up camp and was mixing some things together.

"Want me to make ya somethin'?" Amy asked.

"Yes, please." Aubrey didn't care what. She didn't want to feel the need to be in control tonight like she always is. It's exhausting sometimes.

Aubrey was three drinks in when Stacie finally showed up and she was definitely feeling them. She didn't want to seem overly excited that Stacie was there so she remained on the couch with her drink. Aubrey kept her eyes off of the brunette but, out of the corner of her eye, she watched Stacie look around the room until her eyes finally stilled when they reached Aubrey. The blonde felt a twinge of something in the pit of her stomach, knowing that Stacie was clearly looking for her because her eyes stopped searching when they found her.

Aubrey turned towards Stacie, meeting her eyes and the tall girl made her way to the couch. "Stacie! You're here!" Aubrey couldn't help the grin that took over her face.

"And you are drunk, apparently! I get here a little late and miss all of the fun?"

"No, you just got here so the fun's just beginning." Aubrey winked.

"Smooth, Posen. Real smooth. And I'm jusssttt gonnnnaa go ahead and take this from you," Stacie said as she took Aubrey's drink. She chugged it down and stood to go get another.

Aubrey grabbed Stacie's hand. "Don't leave me. You just got here."

"I'm just going to go get a drink. You stay here and save my spot."

Aubrey stayed put and her eyes scanned the room. They reached Chloe and Beca who were sitting closely and whispering to each other, giggling. Aubrey felt a pang of jealously as she watched them together. They may not know yet in what way they're into each other, but Aubrey can see that they will soon. Aubrey realized then just how lonely she felt most of the time. She hadn't had a boyfriend since she went through a string of them during her crazy second semester as a freshman. She was usually too focused on school to mind but lately she's been wanting something more.

Aubrey could sense the moment her 'fun buzz' turned into 'emotional drunk' and she had enough sense to not want anyone else to witness it. Stacie came back with her drink just as Aubrey was standing to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"I - I don't feel so good." Aubrey knew she needed to get out of there fast.

Stacie set down her drink and gently grabbed Aubrey's arm. "Are you okay?"

"I'm going to go lay down." She pushed by Stacie and half-heartedly swatted her hand away when she reached out for Aubrey again.

"Aubrey, let me help you. I'll bring you to your room."

Aubrey didn't say anything in response but she let Stacie walk with her to her room. Stacie hadn't actually ever been inside Aubrey's room and it didn't seem like Aubrey was going to let that change. The blonde began going into the door and stood in the frame as she turned around to look at Stacie. Stacie couldn't read Aubrey's body language but she figured the girl really must not be feeling well because she seemed pretty off.

Aubrey leaned forward and softly gave Stacie a peck on the cheek. "Thanks for watching out, Stace. Love you," she said as she disappeared inside her room. Stacie stood there for several moments trying to process what just happened. It was so confusing to her because it was all so casually done but Aubrey had never kissed her cheek before. And she had certainly never said "love you" before either. Friends do that though, right? Stacie had never had many girls that she could call her friend but she was pretty sure girls do those casual acts of affection. She really shouldn't read into it because that's probably all it was. The problem, Stacie realized after a bit, was how disappointed she was in thinking it was nothing more than casual.

A/N: Thanks for reading this first chapter. First chapters are my least favorite to write.