A/N: As you can see, I'm not dead. I know it's been a long time, and I can't apologize enough. I have no excuse except that my life is very busy. However, I had a little time to write this piece of silliness, and I hope that's a consolation for my unfinished pieces you're waiting on. This is written for the Pi Day Challenge at The Room forum. Unfortunately, it's too long to meet the challenge (it couldn't be longer than 5,314 words), so this is just an 'inspired by' story, but I thought I'd post it anyway.
A bit of setup for the story is that it's set between seasons one and two. It will be canon with a few minor tweaks, but said tweaks should be self-explanatory.
And last but not least, a huge thank you to Miss Scorp for her beta help. Since I'm so rusty, her second pair of eyes made this story much better than it was.
Disclaimer: SeaQuest DSVand its characters are not my creation. They are the creation of Rockne S. O'Bannon as a 1990's television series. This work of fanfiction is for entertainment purposes only and is not for financial gain. I am just borrowing the characters for a bit and promise to return them unharmed and in their original condition, maybe just a bit happier.
It's a Nice Day for an Almost Marriage (And Other Pi Day Shenanigans)
New Cape Quest, 2020
"Sorry I'm late," Kristin apologized as she walked through Janet Noyce's door, arms laden with shopping bags.
"It's all right." Janet moved to help her. "Lunch isn't here yet anyway." She set Kristin's bags down on the counter. "Looks like you outdid yourself today."
"Did you find a dress for tonight, Doc?" Katie asked from her seat on the sofa.
"I think so," Kristin replied with a light sigh. "I went to three different shops before I found the right one, and of course, I needed some matching shoes, and... Well, I know I normally don't get caught up with things like this, but I just couldn't help myself."
"Oh, Doc, you don't need to explain yourself. You should get caught up in it; you only get one six-month anniversary." Katie got up and moved to the counter. She stood on her tiptoes and peeked inside one of the bags. "Don't keep us in suspense; let's see it."
Kristin pulled out a deep blue off the shoulder evening dress with small silver beading along the top edge; she held it in front of her. "What do you think?"
"Oh, it's lovely, Kristin," Janet told her. "Just lovely."
"Indeed," Katie agreed. "Absolutely gorgeous."
"You really think so?" Kristin folded the dress and placed it back in the bag. "It's been so long since I've had to pick out something special for an occasion like this..."
Janet nodded sympathetically. "Well, Nathan won't be able to resist you in that. I'll bet he'll -" A knock at the door made her stop short. "Hold that thought," she said, moving to answer it.
Kristin peered over her shoulder and saw a young man dressed in a black and brown khaki uniform with 'Flowerworks' embroidered on the right sight of his shirt with a circle of colorful flowers surrounding the wording. In his arms was a long white box with a red ribbon around the top. "Delivery for Miss Kristin Westphalen," he said.
Janet stepped aside and Kristin moved forward, holding up a hand. "Right here."
The young man thrust the box towards her and held out a tablet. "I just need a signature."
Kristin quickly signed. "Thank you."
"You're welcome, ma'am." He turned to leave. "Have a nice day."
Janet shut the door behind him. "Apparently, Nathan's just as caught up as you are." She indicated the box with a wink. "Bet those are roses."
"That man needs to stop." Kristin grinned as she pulled the ribbon off the box and opened it to find two dozen red long-stemmed roses. "Oh, he's going to spoil me."
"And you deserve it," Katie told her.
"I stopped at the base an hour ago, just to confirm what time he was picking me up for dinner. He had no idea I was coming here until then." She smiled dreamily. "I'm not sure I ever met another man so thoughtful."
Janet walked to the kitchen cupboard, pulled out a large vase, and filled it with water before handing it to Kristin. "Just where is that thoughtful man taking you?"
"I don't know," she replied with a shrug as she began to place the roses into the vase. "He's being mysterious..." Her brow puckered. "Well, about a lot of things, actually, including a special gift for me, which he will only say is yellow and I can hold it on one finger."
Katie's brow rose. "You're kidding. Well, yellow must mean gold." She exchanged glances with Janet, who nodded in agreement. "You don't think..."
"It certainly sounds that way," Janet turned to Kristin. "He's going to give you an engagement ring."
Kristin shook her head. "I didn't say that."
"Well, what will you say if it is?" Katie pressed.
"I...I don't know." A small, girlish laugh escaped her as she continued to fiddle with the roses. "I mean, don't think the thought didn't cross my mind the moment Nathan dropped those clues, but I don't think..." She shrugged, turning to her friends. "Don't get me wrong; it would be nice to be asked, I suppose, but I...I don't think I'm ready to get married again. Not just yet. It's not even something he and I even discussed... Besides, his clues could describe about a hundred other things."
"Keep telling yourself that, Doc," Katie said with a wry grin. "If I were you, I'd be thinking of a way to let him down easy."
Before Kristin could offer a reply, she heard a familiar male voice ask, "Let who down easy?"
The women all turned to see Ben holding bags of takeout food; Janet moved to take them from him.
"How did you sneak in here?" Katie asked, one brow lifted.
"I came through the back door." He held up the bags. "Janet asked me to pick up lunch, since I was in the neighborhood. I've been filling out more applications, you see."
Katie shook her head. "I told you there's a place for you on the Clinton if you want it. I don't know why you're being so stubborn about it."
Ben shrugged as Janet moved to take the food from him. "I know, but I'm just not sure the sea is the right place for me anymore. Besides, do you really want to put up with me for another year?"
"I could think of worse things to put up with," she teased.
"Look, we'll talk about it more later, but first, I want to know who the doc has to let down easy."
Kristin waved a dismissive hand. "It's really not important."
"Oh, yes, it is," Katie countered. "Did you hear the captain's giving her a ring tonight?"
"No, he's not," Kristin turned to Ben. "She's delusional."
"Maybe not," Janet said while taking the containers of food out of the bags. "You have to admit something yellow that fits on one finger sounds like it could be a ring."
"There are also several other things it could be," Kristin pointed out.
Katie crossed her arms over her chest. "Oh, yeah, like what?"
"Well, like..." Kristin sighed, suddenly at a loss. "It could be..."
"Yes?" Janet pressed.
"A little plastic animal on a key chain," Ben helpfully supplied, pulling out his own set of keys. "See, I've got a giraffe on mine. Maybe the captain got you one?"
"And why would he get her one of those?" Katie asked with a roll of her eyes.
"I don't know." Ben scratched the tip of his nose. "Maybe it's to go with her new car?"
Janet gasped. "Nathan bought her a new car?"
"N-no." Ben shook his head. "I mean, I don't know. I just thought we were guessing. Then again, it could be a ring. I asked Katie to marry me on Pi Day, too," he said with a grin.
Kristin's brow furrowed. "Pie Day? What's that?"
Ben's gaped at her. "What? Are you serious? You don't know what Pi Day is?" At her nod, his jaw nearly hit the floor. "I thought you of all people would know, being you're a science geek and all."
"Ben!" Katie said with a click of her tongue.
"Sorry," Ben muttered sheepishly. "Er, I mean, I assumed you'd have heard of it..."
"I fail to see what eating pie has to do with science." Kristin didn't bother to mask the annoyance in her voice.
Ben laughed softly. "No, not that kind of pie, though that's one way to celebrate, I guess." He ran a hand through his hair. "I mean pi, like three point one four." At Kristin's quizzical look, he explained, "You see, today is the fourteenth of March, otherwise written as 3/14. Pi Day. Get it?"
"Oh, now that you mention it," she said with a nod, "I have heard of it. It's not really something we Brits celebrate, not in the traditional sense anyway, since we write our dates differently. However, you will hear about it among academic types. It's just..." She paused to take a breath. "No offense,but I've always found the idea of it a bit...silly."
"Silly?" Ben scoffed. "No way, it's loads of fun. I have a Pi Day celebration every year."
"He does," Katie confirmed with an amused look. "Something he's done since before I knew him, apparently."
Ben nodded. "I know I'm probably not the sort of guy you'd consider being into that sort of thing, but any holiday that means eating pie and lots of it is right up my alley."
"Pie? As in the food? That's how you celebrate Pi Day?" Kristin asked.
"Yes, indeed," Ben replied. "I always have a huge feast of all kinds of pies. Meat and pot pies for entrees, fruit pies for dessert. It's too bad you and the captain won't be there for the party I'm throwing." He grinned. "I'll save you some pie if you'd like."
"It's all right, really. Just please don't spread any rumors around about the captain asking me to marry him, okay?"
"Oh, Doc, you know you can trust me, right?" Ben said, putting an arm around her shoulders. "I won't say a word."
"You better not," Katie warned. "Or else I'll have to ruin your Pi Day."
Ben held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'll be good, I promise. Just don't ruin my pies." He turned back to Kristin and gave her a wink. "Have fun tonight, Doc."
"Thank you, Ben," Kristin replied.
"Go on," Katie ordered as she steered him towards the door. "Go, get your pies ready."
"Can you believe she didn't know what Pi Day was?" Ben said as Katie ushered him out. "Next she'll be saying she doesn't know what May the Fourth is."
A brow rose. "May the what?" Kristin asked.
Ben took a step forward. "Seriously, Doc, I thought you of all people would -"
Katie gave him a gentle push. "Just go, Ben, you can school her on it another time."
Ben relented. "Fine, but this isn't over. See you ladies later." With that, he was out the door.
Katie closed the door behind him. "That man."
Janet smiled. "And just what is the story on that man? You two seemed awfully friendly."
"Well, of course we are. We're friends," Katie replied innocently. "Nothing new there."
"No, you're right," Kristin replied, moving forward to lean on the counter next to Katie. "It's not new that you two are friends, sure, but I have to say, I certainly wouldn't volunteer to live with my ex-husband for another whole year..."
"Well, I... It's just that..." She colored prettily. "Ben, you see, he needs..." She sighed. "All right, fine. Apparently, there's no hiding anything from you two." She smiled. "Ben and I... We started dating again. We've only been out twice so far, so it's not like it's been going on for ages. We're taking it slow, seeing where it leads."
"See, I knew you were hiding something," Janet said with a grin. "But good for you. I'm glad, and I hope it leads to something wonderful for both of you."
"I feel the exact same way," Kristin agreed. "I know you mentioned the reason you two divorced was the fact you felt like Ben's mother instead of his wife. Well... I hope things are better this time around."
"So far, so good." Katie rapped her knuckles on the wall. "I know he's still a bit immature, but he really has grown up a lot over the past year. I never thought it before, but now, I think it's a good thing we were on seaQuest together."
Kristin nodded. "Well, you know what they say. Everything happens for a reason. Now, not to change the subject, but I have to ask... Did Ben really propose to you on Pi Day?"
Katie smiled. "He did. He baked the ring inside a blueberry pie. Then he made me eat it to find it."
Janet laughed. "Really?"
"I swear I wouldn't lie about that. Only he didn't tell me about the ring right away. When I told him I couldn't eat anymore, he insisted I finish it. I told him if I ate another bite, I was going to throw up, so he explained about the ring. Then he helped me finish it until we found said ring. I know it sounds a bit silly, but it was actually very sweet. Only bad thing was it took forever to clean the blueberry bits off the ring. I swear I was picking blueberry off the ring even after the wedding," she said with a light laugh.
"Well, thank goodness he told you about the ring before a terrible accident." Janet took a seat on the couch. "Shortly after Bill and I were married, there was a young couple we befriended on base, John and Lisa Schreiner. John thought it would be a good idea to hide Lisa's engagement ring inside a piece of cake. I think in his mind, he thought she'd find it while eating it..."
"Only I'm going to guess he failed to mention that fact, and poor Lisa swallowed it?" Kristin said. "I've seen a few cases of swallowed engagement rings in my day." She gave a shake of her head. "I don't know why people feel the need to hide the ring inside food. What's wrong with an old-fashioned box?"
"Because that's boring, Doc," Katie teased. "Besides, isn't the presentation of it all a bit romantic?"
"I don't consider a trip to the emergency room romantic," Kristin stated flatly. "But honestly, can we please stop talking about all this ring business? I'm not getting a ring. I wish I'd never even brought it up."
"Never say never, dear, but if it will make you happy, Katie and I will refrain. Though tomorrow, don't say we didn't tell you so when you're showing it off," Janet said with a wink as she set the plates of food out. "Let's eat, and then Katie can tell us more about what she and Ben have been up to."
-ʎɐp ᴉd-
Later that evening, Nathan arrived at Kristin's apartment. The moment he walked through the door, Kristin's stomach did an involuntary flip. Though she hadn't given the day's earlier conversation with Katie and Janet much thought after the fact, the thought that Nathan could ask her to marry him suddenly weaseled its way into her brain. Oh, God, what if they're right?
Nathan leaned over to kiss her. "Hello, gorgeous," he whispered in her ear. "You sure are a sight for sore eyes."
"Th-" Kristin's voice caught in her throat. She cleared it and tried again. "Thank you," she replied. "You...you don't look so bad yourself." Is my voice shaking? Kristin thought with a frown. God, pull yourself together, woman, or -
"Kristin, are you all right?" Nathan's voice was laced with concern. "You're shaking, and if you don't mind me saying, you look like a deer caught in headlights."
"I'm...I'm fine." Kristin tried to keep her voice steady. "I...I mean, I guess I'm a little... Well, a bit nervous... and excited. I just can't believe it's been six months already." She bit her bottom lip. I hope he buys that. I don't want him to know I that I know... Well, what I suspect, anyway.
"Oh, is that all?" Nathan gave her arm a gentle squeeze. "I know it's like these months have just flown by, but don't worry." He smiled. "Let's just enjoy the night together, and we'll have plenty more anniversaries to celebrate after."
What? What does he mean by that? Is that another hint? She gave a gentle shake of her head. No, wait, you don't want to jump to conclusions. Nathan's right. Let's just enjoy the night. Everything will be fine.
Nathan offered his arm to her. "Well, shall we? We don't want to miss our reservation."
Kristin accepted his arm. "Of course."
Once inside the car, Kristin glanced towards the back seat, just to see if she could catch a glimpse of a gift box. Of course, if it's a ring, it's probably in his pocket.
"Looking for something?" Nathan asked as he climbed into the driver's seat.
Kristin startled and turned back around. "N-no, I was just... Uh..." She bit her bottom lip trying to come up with a valid excuse, but her mind suddenly went blank.
Nathan laughed softly. "You were looking for your gift, weren't you?"
She crossed her arms over her chest. "I was not! I was just... You see, I was just..."
"That's what I thought," Nathan teased as he placed the key in the ignition and gave it a turn. He then reached over and patted her hand gently. "Well, you can keep looking back there all you like, but you won't find it. It's already at the restaurant, so you'll just have to be patient."
"I wasn't looking for my present," she informed him as he pulled the car onto the road. "I was just...looking to see if you brought my sweater. You know, the one I left at your house last week?" A slight smile graced her face, proud she'd finally thought of something that sounded somewhat valid. Unfortunately, she knew full well Nathan returned that sweater to her days earlier, but she was hoping...
"Your sweater? You mean your white one?" Nathan asked, raising a brow. "You sure I still have it? I thought I brought it to you."
Her smile grew a little wider. "No, you didn't." She ignored the stab of guilt over her white lie. She reached over and patted his shoulder. "It's fine, I can get it another time. I was just thinking it might come in handy in case I get a little cold..."
"Then I'll offer you my jacket," Nathan told her, taking her hand in his and giving a gentle squeeze. "I'll take care of you, don't worry."
"You're too good to me," she muttered, her mind suddenly starting to wander. He says it's at the restaurant already? What if he did hide it in the food? I better eat slowly. Last thing I need is wind up in the emergency room. I'd never live it down...
-ʎɐp ᴉd-
Nathan had chosen one of the best restaurants in town, La Cucina Fresca, which featured an outdoor balcony. "I hope you don't mind eating outside," Nathan whispered to her. "I thought it might be nice to dine under the stars."
"Not at all," she replied, seeing the table set with candles, the waiter bringing a bottle of champagne ready to pour into their glasses. In the corner of the balcony sat four musicians with violins playing soft music. As Nathan pulled out her chair, Kristin noticed that save for a few other couples scattered around the area, they had the section mostly to themselves. "This is lovely. Thank you."
"This is just the beginning," Nathan told her as he took his own seat. "There are a few surprises around the corner." He held up his glass. "To a wonderful evening."
Kristin followed suit and their glasses touched with a light tink. "Indeed," she replied before taking a drink.
After ordering, the waiter brought them a bread basket. Kristin took the cloth napkin and set it on her lap, but she couldn't stop herself from shaking said napkin out to see if anything happened to be hidden inside of it. Of course, she found nothing.
Though Nathan gave her a quizzical look, he simply took a dinner roll for himself and then passed the basket towards Kristin. "I just have to tell you that these past six months have been some of the finest of my life, and I hope that this is just the first of many special occasions we'll celebrate together..."
While Nathan spoke, Kristin took a roll from the basket and began tearing it open to see if it contained a ring. Finding nothing, she put it back and chose another roll, repeating the process.
"And I just hope that you feel the same way I do," Nathan continued.
"Of course," Kristin muttered, barely looking up from her dinner roll scavenger hunt.
"You know, I've met a lot of sailors with very healthy appetites in my career, but I'm not sure I've ever met anyone who took such an interest in their food as you," Nathan commented wryly.
Kristin suddenly dropped the roll she was holding. "Sorry, nervous habit." She picked up her knife and reached for the butter. As she did, however, another thought crossed her mind. Maybe the ring is in the butter? She slowly began mashing the butter with her knife.
Nathan motioned towards the butter dish. "You know, if there's something wrong with the butter, I'm sure we can ask the waiter to get us a new batch."
"No, no, nothing to worry about. I just heard a report on the news not too long ago where there was a maggot outbreak, and several pounds of beef had to be recalled. I hadn't heard anything about butter, but one can never be too careful," Kristin said, putting down her knife and taking a bite out of her roll.
"I see." Nathan sounded skeptical, and she couldn't blame him. The story sounded odd, even to her. "I must have missed that story, but I suppose I can understand the concern, this being a five-star restaurant and all."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply this wasn't a perfectly wonderful restaurant. I just -"
At that moment, a hostess carrying a basket of roses handed one to Kristin. "A rose for madame."
"Oh, thank you." Kristin took it from her and smelled it. She then started to search through the petals and even turned the rose upside down and gave it a shake. When nothing came out, she turned it back over and started to tear the petals off.
Nathan leaned over and looked at the rose, too. "Something wrong? Are you looking for maggots in there, too?"
"N-no, I was just..."
"Looking for your present, weren't you?" Nathan accused, but his tone was light. "You're like a kid on Christmas morning," he teased, "but you don't need to worry. I didn't hide it in the food, the flowers, or the champagne. It's not in any of the desserts either. If you can just wait until we finish our meal, you'll see what it is, okay?"
Kristin raised her glass and then took a drink. "It's a deal."
-ʎɐp ᴉd-
Once Kristin knew she wouldn't risk swallowing any non-edible items, she was able to relax, and she and Nathan enjoyed a wonderful meal. Once the waiter cleared away their dirty dishes, Nathan waved a hand and the waiter brought over a serving dish covered with a domed silver lid. He set it down on the table before leaving again.
"Well, I think you've waited long enough," Nathan joked. "But first, you need to close your eyes."
"They're closed," Kristin breathed, raising a hand to her chest in anticipation.
"All right," Nathan said. "Now open them."
When Kristin did, she saw the lid had been removed, only she couldn't mask her disappointment when she didn't see a ring before her at all. Instead, she saw a little yellow finch on a branch inside a small, clear plastic cage. As if on cue, the little finch began to tweet. Kristin's mouth fell open as she glanced toward Nathan, who was wearing a wide grin. She then glanced to the bird and then back at Nathan again, trying to decide if she was dreaming.
"Well?" Nathan indicated the finch with a nod. "What do you think?"
"A bird?" Her voice was a tad shrill, even to her own ears. She took a sip of champagne before trying again. "This is what you were giving me that's yellow and fits on one finger..."
"Yeah," Nathan said with a laugh. "Do you like him?"
"Oh, yes... Very much." Kristin attempted to plaster a grateful smile on her face and hoped Nathan didn't see through it. "He's a fine bird."
"You're disappointed."
"N-no, I'm not." Kristin gave a slight shake of her head, still wearing the fake smile. "Really."
Nathan's smile faded. "Gosh, I thought my clues were a little too on the nose."
"Well, you shouldn't have worried," Kristin quickly assured him, feeling bad for how she was acting. It was a thoughtful present, she reasoned. It just wasn't the one she foolishly allowed herself to anticipate "I could never have guessed, not in a million years, not even if the most renowned psychics were working with me 'round the clock." Only she couldn't stop the slight shake in her voice.
"You know, I could have gotten you anything. A necklace or a car..."
"But what would be the point when you could get me a bird like this?" Kristin said, grabbing her napkin and dabbing at her eyes.
"Oh, Kris, I think you're missing the point. You have no idea why I got him for you, do you?"
"No."
"Kris, don't you remember telling me how you lost your little yellow finch when you were a girl and how it almost killed you because it was the first pet you ever loved?"
"I remember having a bird as a child, yes, but I don't remember being that overwrought."
"Come on, you were sitting right in front of my fireplace when you told me."
"It must have been Carol."
"Tears streaming down your face..."
"I must have been kidding. Oh, Nathan, you know how dramatic I can be sometimes. Or maybe I was upset about something else? I do that sometimes when I really don't want to say what's bothering me and then I blame it on something trivial." She ran a hand through her hair. "Not that this bird is trivial. It's just not...exactly what I was expecting." She motioned towards the bird, feeling tears well up in her eyes again. "He's truly a fine bird."
"Oh, hogwash." Nathan put an arm around her shoulders and kissed her on the forehead. "You've got a face longer than the bar bill."
Kristin dabbed at her eyes with her napkin again. "And it is yellow and it does fit on one finger."
"I can't believe it. How could I be so dense?"
"What do you mean?" Kristin muttered, trying to stop her tears.
"You were expecting a ring, weren't you?"
Kristin lifted her head and threw her napkin on the table. "A ring? No, don't be ridiculous."
"You can't fool me," Nathan said with a laugh. "You crushed several dinner rolls and if I hadn't stopped you, you probably would have dissected your entire meal. You were mining for diamonds."
Kristin's sadness suddenly turned to annoyance. "Nathan Bridger, you know I'm not materialistic like that! Now you look into my eyes and read my lips. I was not expecting a ring!"
"I'm sorry," Nathan soothed. "I didn't mean to insult you. Materialistic, I know you're not, but you absolutely thought I was going to pop the question, and if you don't mind me saying so, I'm absolutely flattered. An old sailor like me and a beautiful woman like you..." He flashed her a grin. "I had no idea you felt that way, sweetheart."
"I beg your pardon, darling, but that's your little fantasy, not mine," Kristin countered, her cheeks turning warm.
"You can't fool me," Nathan said. "So maybe it's time we do something about it."
"What do you mean?"
"Marry me."
"What?" Kristin asked, her mouth agape.
"I said marry me." He tapped his hand on the table for emphasis. "Forget the ring; we can handle that later. You can move in with me, and we'll raise the bird together."
Kristin pushed Nathan's glass of champagne away from him. "And I think that comment means you've had just a little too much to drink."
"Kristin, I'm serious. Marry me."
She laughed. "Nathan, my dear, we cannot get married."
"Why not?"
"Because it's absolutely nuts is why not," Kristin stated, her voice a little breathier than she liked. "We...we just can't."
"Everybody else does it," Nathan informed her as if that was all the reason in the world why they should. "People not half as nice or responsible. And just think of all the money we could collect."
Kristin's brow furrowed. "What money?"
"Well, for some strange reason, there's quite a few betting pools being put together around the base speculating on the odds of anyone ever getting me down the aisle again."
"Hmm, and I'm going to bet the largest one has been orchestrated by Ben?"
"To be fair, he's no longer in the military... Or at least he keeps telling himself that, though I suspect that's just a phase."
"Be that as it may, you knew about those pools and you never put a stop to them?"
"It seemed harmless," Nathan admitted with a shrug. "I myself abhor this practice, but if you're game, we could stand to gain at least five grand...maybe more."
"You romantic dog you," Kristin said with a roll of her eyes. "Is that the only reason you've suddenly lost your mind?"
He took her hand in his. "No, of course not." He sobered. "You're the first woman who hasn't made me feel lonely since I lost Carol."
"And you're the first man who hasn't broken my heart into a million pieces."
"I don't intend to either." He gave her hand a kiss. "What do you say, Kris? Are you ready to be Mrs. Nathan Bridger?"
She pretended to give the matter serious thought. "I say you're going to have a hard time slipping that bird on my finger."
Nathan waved a hand. "Waiter, bring another bottle of champagne. We have something else we need to celebrate."
-ʎɐp ᴉd-
"Ugh," Kristin groaned as the light streaming through her bedroom window stung her eyes. She attempted to roll over, but the moment she moved, her head started pounding and her stomach churned. Brief glimpses of the previous night came flooding back to her. Despite her current physical state, she suddenly sat bolt upright. "Oh, my God..." A hand rose to her mouth as she searched the room for Nathan. As she did so, she spied a bouquet of fake flowers tied up with a ribbon sitting on her bedside table. "Oh, no, we did, didn't we? I...I can't believe we -"
"Kristin? Honey, are you up there?" Janet's voice called from downstairs.
"Y-yes," Kristin called back. She'd had half a mind not to answer at all, but she'd already heard her coming up the stairs. She suddenly remembered she was supposed to help Janet pick out some new wallpaper for her kitchen.
A moment later, Janet and Katie appeared in her bedroom doorway, Janet's mouth falling open. "Oh, Kristin, I'm sorry we..."
"Doc, if you don't mind me saying so, you look awful," Katie said.
Janet nodded her agreement. "What in the world happened to you?"
Kristin stumbled out of bed. "I look awful because I feel awful, and I feel awful because Nathan and I drank all the champagne in New Cape Quest. And then we...apparently got married."
"I don't believe it." Katie blinked rapidly. "The captain did give you a ring."
"No, actually." Kristin motioned to the finch in a birdcage in the corner of the room. "He gave me the bird... But we got married anyway. Only I have no idea where my new husband is at the moment..."
"Well, gee, this is such a surprise," Katie said with a laugh. "It's too bad we didn't know beforehand. We'd have liked to have given you a shower."
"Well, that's all right, we can plan a party for the two of them, invite everyone." Janet clapped her hands together. "It'll be lovely."
Kristin shook her head, stumbling to the bathroom and grabbing a bottle of pain reliever. She popped a couple in her mouth and swallowed. "Are you two kidding?" She nearly choked on the pills. "I don't want to be married! I want out!"
Katie and Janet exchanged worried glances. "What are you talking about?" Janet frowned. "I thought this was what you wanted?"
"I...I thought I did, but it was more the thought of it. Don't get me wrong, I love Nathan, but we were intoxicated! He's a widower, and I'm a divorcee!" She exited the bathroom. "He's still in mourning, and I'm still...healing. I just... I can barely even remember the wedding, if you can even call it that. We went to one of those all-night wedding chapels, and if my memory serves me correctly, our witnesses were a little couple dressed up as the Na'vi from Avatar and the preacher was dressed as E.T., though don't quote me," she muttered as she flopped down on the armchair near the birdcage. "That may have just been a drunken hallucination."
Janet moved to sit on the arm of the chair and put her arm around Kristin's shoulders. "Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry."
Katie took a seat on the bed. "But...how is the captain going to feel about getting unmarried?"
"He will be devastated," Kristin admitted. "It was his idea in the first place, and I think he was just doing it to appease me." She placed her head in her hands. "He was so happy last night, and he promised me he'd never break my heart. Now I'm going to break his."
"Gosh, Doc, maybe...maybe it won't be as bad as you think?" Katie attempted to assure her, but it did little to boost her confidence. "Maybe he'll understand?"
"Understand what?"
The three of them jumped and whipped around to see Nathan standing in the bedroom doorway, looking refreshed. "Good morning, ladies," Nathan said with a wide grin. He walked towards Kristin and kissed her. "How's my bride? I trust all of you have heard the news of our recent nuptials."
"Yes, congratulations," Katie said with a nervous laugh as she stood. "Maybe we should celebrate with some...coffee? Janet, why don't you come downstairs and help me with that, and let these two talk?"
Janet followed suit. "Yes, I think that's a wonderful idea. Come downstairs when you're ready, both of you."
"Right," Nathan replied, turning to Kristin again. "When I woke up this morning, I couldn't believe what we'd gone and done." He laughed and patted her leg, the sound causing her to jump, which in turn made her head pound even more. "I guess the Na'vi didn't feel the need to tear our blessed union asunder?"
"I suppose not." She brought a hand to her head and rubbed gently. "How...how in the world are so..." She gave a slight shake of her head and grimaced at the action. "I mean, don't you feel like an honorary member of The Walking Dead like I do?"
Nathan laughed. "It's an old secret I learned as a cadet at the academy." He retrieved a small bottle of greenish brown liquid from his pocket. "I can't share with you what's in it, because if you knew, you'd feel even more nauseous than you likely do now, and it won't be appetizing, but a few swigs of this, and you'll feel good as new."
Just looking at the bottle of putrid-looking juice made Kristin's stomach flop. "That's all right, I think I'll pass."
"Suit yourself," he said, putting the bottle away. He then reached into his other pocket and pulled out an envelope. "That said, I called my lawyer this morning, and he agreed to take care of all the loose ends for us. All you need to do is sign on the dotted line, and we're done."
Kristin narrowed her eyes and attempted to read what was on the paper, but it was all a blur. "What dotted line? What is that?"
"Annulment papers."
"Annulment papers?"
"Kristin, honey, you know how I feel about you, but we shouldn't have to suffer the rest of our lives for one careless, stupid, drunken blunder."
"You old sweet talker you," Kristin muttered flatly.
Nathan shook his head. "Kristin, don't get upset. You know what I'm trying to say."
"Of course I do." She knew she was being churlish, but she couldn't help it. "You're saying you like me. You just don't want to be married to me."
Nathan folded the paper and put it back in his pocket. "Come on, Kris, do you really want to tell everyone about our special day with E.T. and the Na'vi? I mean, if we... When we... Don't you want everyone to be there? Don't you want a cake, flowers, a band? Don't you want it to be a day we'll actually remember rather than brief glimpses of little blue people?" He took her hand in his. "Look, what I'm saying is I love you, and being married to you would make my dreams come true, but you know as well as I do that this way isn't the right way."
Kristin said nothing. She simply crossed her arms over her chest. Yes, she knew full well Nathan was being quite rational about it all, but the fact he went and did all this without consulting her...
"Then again, I suppose I didn't consider how you feel..." Nathan continued with a frown. "How insensitive of me. Look, Kris, if you don't want an annulment, we don't have to get one. I guess I just assumed..."
"N-no, I do," she said. "I mean, I..." She sighed. "I'm sorry, I know you're absolutely right. When... If... Well, it should be done the right way, not like this."
Nathan smiled and took the papers out again. "So you'll be happy to sign?"
"When the room stops spinning." She leaned her head against his shoulder. "Yes."
He laughed softly and kissed her forehead. "I knew you felt the same way I did."
"Yeah, well, next time, I wouldn't press your luck. For all you know, a Na'vi wedding is my idea of a dream come true. Well," she said with a sigh, "I suppose we should go break the news to the girls."
Nathan stood and held out his hand to help her up. "And after that, how about a nice, long nap?"
"Now you're talking my language."
As they headed down the stairs, Kristin told him, "If you don't mind, I really don't think we should tell Ben about this. We'd never live it down."
"Agreed," Nathan said. "Besides, there's no way I want him profit -"
"Tell me what?"
"Oh, no," Kristin muttered as she and Nathan entered the kitchen and she saw Ben standing there, a stack of pie boxes on the counter.
"Ben brought you some pie, Doc," Katie announced before leaning close to whisper, "Don't worry, he doesn't know about your news."
"It's too bad you two weren't there," Ben said. "It was a real blast. Lucas won the pie-eating contest."
"Well, there's always next year. Heck, maybe some day, we'll even have a Pi Day Wedding."
Ben's eyes lit up. "So it was a ring after all?"
"No, it was a bird," Nathan replied, turning to Kristin, "but there's always next year, sweetheart, hm?"
"Indeed," she agreed.
Ben raised his hand. "Well, if you have to let me be your planner. We could have meat pies, pot pies, and fruit pies. It would be the Pi Day Pie Wedding of the century." He paused. "But what was it you two didn't want to tell me?"
"Just that we're sorry we missed your party," Kristin said with a shrug. "We didn't want to make you feel bad."
"Oh, is that all?" Ben replied, waving a hand dismissively. "That's all right, we could do a reenactment of sorts right now." He moved to the cabinet and started pulling out plates. "After all, the greatest thing about Pi Day is eating all the leftover pie the next day."
Nathan lowered his voice and whispered to Kristin. "And apparently cleaning up Pi Day drunken mistakes."
She laughed and whispered back, "But that's our secret."