Hello, I'm Smitty and this is the first of hopefully many fanfics where I subject Jack, his crew, and whomever else seems deserving to whatever weirdness I can come up with. Thanks for having a look, and I hope you enjoy!
Captain Jack Sparrow gritted his teeth as another colossal wave washed over the deck of his beloved Black Pearl. Well, this was bloody fantastic. I finally get the Pearl back, and I sail it right into the biggest bloody storm I've ever seen! It wasn't Jack's fault entirely. The storm his ship was smack dab in the middle of seemed to have materialize out of thin air which, well, all storms do, but this one did it with frightening swiftness. The storm, which had an eerie purple green hue the likes of which Jack had never seen before, seemed to zero in on the Black Pearl and engulf it.
Jack stood at the helm, fighting the storm for all he was worth, but it seemed to be a losing battle. He saw through a thick sheet of rain that his crew was having a hard enough time staying aboard the ship, let alone work the rigging. Jack took his eyes of the crew and concentrated on the storm again just in time to witness a wave twice the height of the Pearl rear up and prepare to swallow his ship.
Jack groaned and rolled over in bed. In bed? Wasn't he just on his ship? He was filled with panic for a moment remembering the storm and the immense wave. Jack slowly realized it was all a dream. A nightmare. It was so vivid in his mind he didn't even know where he was. Just then, he heard a woman yawning next to him. Ah, so that's where he was.
"Good morning, Captain Sparrow." A voice cooed
Oh, he liked this girl. Knew his name. He didn't even have to correct her.
"Or should I say Commodore Sparrow!"
Hoooold on. Something wasn't right.
"Oh darling, I'm so excited for you!"
Something definitely wasn't right. Nobody in Tortuga was this pleasant, no matter how much you paid them. He slowly turned over in bed and opened his eyes to see a women about as un-wenchlike as you could possibly be. Her chestnut hair was perfectly curled and shining in the early morning sunlight, and her nightgown looked fancier then most dresses. She seemed roughly his age, but her eyes sparkled with the vitality of youth.
"The ceremony is going to start soon. You'd better hurry or you'll be late for your own promotion!
Now he was really lost.
"What the bloody hell are you talking about?"
She sat up in bed, looking slightly taken aback by Jack's choice of words, but spoke cheerfully as she got out of bed and moved gracefully around the room.
"Don't tell me you forgot it was today! The ceremony for your promotion to Commodore." She then straightened up and spoke in a voice Jack had to admit was a spot-on imitation of Governor Swann "For strategical brilliance in tireless defense of Port Royal." She then dropped the Swann voice and adopted a scolding tone that Jack knew only too well for hearing it from almost every woman he had ever met at one time or another." You better not talk like that in front of the Governor! He'd probably faint, or his ears would start to bleed. Now get dressed."
As she walked from the room she shouted "Your uniform is on the settee!" Once she was out of the room, Jack sprang from bed and looked for an escape route. He didn't know where he was or how on Earth he'd gotten there, but he decided he didn't want to stay and find out. That woman was madder then he was, which was a pity because he decided he would have liked her.
As he was looking around for a way to escape, he noticed the opulence of the room he was in. It was full of beautiful furniture and the bed covers and curtains were made of expensive looking fabrics. Colorful paintings and a large mirror covered the walls of the room, and there was a balcony on the far side of the room. He tried to make a run for the balcony, but for some reason unbeknownst to him, they had decided not to move. He looked down to find the source of the problem, and found it staring back up at him with wide black eyes that weren't unlike his own.
"Daddy!"
That's it for his chapter. Please review on your way out !
Next Chapter: Gillette, a wig, a compass, and Jack has a look in the mirror!