Nearly two decades ago, Greg Universe wrote the hit song "Like a Comet". Rather than strike the iron while it was hot, the budding musician instead decided to settle down in the tourist trap town of Beach City and strike a relationship with the mysterious Crystal Gem known as Rose Quartz. Desperate to make a profit, his manager Marty licensed out the song to a fast food chain called Pepe's Burgers, where the song managed to gain popularity and rake in some cash. Flash forward fourteen years later; Marty would later give Greg millions of dollars in his earned royalties for the song, partly out of the goodness of his heart…but mostly because Marty's lawyers advised it.

After using some money to celebrate at Empire City, Greg pondered what to do with the rest of the money. Aside from living expenses and online courses for Steven, he still had plenty of money to spend for himself. He was alright with living in his van, he had no need for jewels and major electronics and he didn't know a thing about stocks. Greg pondered this for a while and then it hit him; he would start his own nudist resort. He enjoyed sleeping in the nude during the really hot nights and read the occasional naturist magazine from time to time, so he figured he might as well take a chance if he had the money. Worst case scenario, he could sell the place for cheap and get his money back.

Getting cleared for the land turned out to be hardest part. Greg had to face opposition from Mayor Dewey, who tried to appeal to the townspeople that a nudist resort was unbecoming of the town's name. Fortunately for Greg, the people of Beach City were completely in favor of a nudist resort being built nearby. Not wanting to face any further backlash, Dewey quickly changed his tune and happily allowed the resort to be built; after all, he needed to make sure his re-election was in the bag and didn't want his fellow citizens upset. Once the mayor bent to public opinion, Greg got the clearance for the land he needed, the actual construction of the resort was fairly smooth. With the help of Steven and the other Crystal Gems, Greg was able cut down on time and money while sticking to regulations. Within a couple of months, the resort ready to open for business.

The day before the grand opening, Greg walked around his resort, talking it all in. His silly little idea was now a reality and the middle-aged, semi-retired musician couldn't help but feel a sense of pride swell within him. He thought of all the ways he'd make his investment work, from spreading the word around to hosting special events. 'This is gonna work,' Greg thought to himself.

"Alright, I just double checked the lodges. We are officially up to code and pass inspection with flying colors," Pearl said, walking up to Greg with a clipboard in her hand.

"All the food and snacks are prepped up more or less," Amethyst shouted, munching on a bag of corn chips.

"And the beds and pool is ready," stated Garnet. "I personally tested the Jacuzzi. Not my thing, but I think it's just warm enough for humans."

"I can't thank you guys enough. You've done me such a big favor and it shows. The place looks great!" gushed Greg, admiring the Gem's handiwork throughout the resort.

"It's the least we could do," Pearl said before a small frown formed on her face. "Although why humans would engage in unclothed activities on purpose is beyond me. Mankind worked its way from loincloths to three piece suits just to go back to nudity? Wouldn't the weather be a problem?"

"What Pearl is trying to say is that we wish we could join in but this mission is important," Garnet interceded, saving face for the team. "I hope you don't mind Steven staying behind."

"Mind? Garnet I would never mind hanging out with my own son," beamed Greg at the mention of Steven. "Lord knows the poor kid could use a staycation-or nakation given where we are-after what he goes through on the daily. Plus I could use the extra help with running the place."

"Don't think you Universes are all alone on this," a voice called not far from them.

Strolling up to the group wearing overalls and a plain white shirt was Vidalia, former groupie and Greg's closest friend. Coincidentally (or not), she was also named co-owner of the resort.

"I'm not going to let my half of the joint go to hell just yet. Yellowtail, the boys, and I are going to pitch and do our fair share. Make this a real family oriented place, you know? So try not stress out about Steven or work too much."

"Really, you guys are the best. You all made this crazy idea a reality. If it wasn't for you guys, I'd probably just given up and blown the money on flat screens and ramen noodles. We made something very special here. And with any luck, everyone will feel the way I'm feeling tomorrow."

Greg glanced around at everyone and couldn't help notice a certain someone was missing from the conversation. "Hey has anyone seen Shtu-Ball?"

As if on cue, yelling erupted from the resort as Steven Universe came running to them, Vidalia's son Onion right alongside him, the two of them wearing shocked and wide eyed expressions on their faces. The two boys stood and tried catching their breaths, to the utter bewilderment of the adults before them.

"Uh…Steven, where's the fire bud? What's with all the running and screaming?" asked Greg, concerned for the young lad.

Steven panted a bit before regaining his composure and replying to his father cheerfully. "Oh, just had some trouble with a raccoon digging through the trash. Onion tried to scare it off and…things went south. It tried to attack us and we just ran. Not our proudest moment…"

"Scaring the animals away are we now?" Vidalia narrowed her eyes at Onion and put her hands on her hips. "Didn't we learn from the possum incident young man?" Onion simply stared off in another direction and whistled a tune, trying to play innocent.

"Oh, I almost forgot! Before that little incident, I managed to see the sign Lapis and Peridot were working on. I think it should be finished by now."

"Well what are we waiting for?" Amethyst piped up, rustling Steven's hair. "Let's go see the handiwork!" With that, the group hurried over to the sign planted right next to the entrance. Sure enough, the green and blue Gems were adding the final details to their work.

"Hey Steven. Hey guys," Lapis greeted in a calm voice. "Salutations to you all," Peridot chirped enthusiastically. "I see you came to observe our latest meep morp as contribution to Greg's shirt optional resort. After several pain-staking hours, we came up with a design that will appease those seeking to expose themselves to the harsh elements. " Lapis merely shrugged, "It's nothing much. Just a little side project we hope you'll like."

"Let's take a good look at it then," smiled Garnet. The rest of the group expressed their eagerness for Peridot and Lapis' "meep morp".

"Very well then," Peridot said, striking a dramatic pose. "Without further ado, I present to you Meep Morp Number 108: A Favor for a Friend."

Stepping aside, the two gems revealed what they worked on. It was a canvas covered in bright colors, greens, blues, purples and oranges splashed about in every corner and in every conceivable angle. In the middle of it was a vague depiction of what appeared to be a red bear, lumpy, chubby looking and yet managing to be appealing. To the right-hand side was the name of Greg's resort, Bear Buns Naturist Resort.

The group stood in awe, admiring the sign's artwork and giving kudos to the artists. "Well I can definitely dig the art. It's the very definition of far out," critiqued Vidalia, "and yet, I can't help but feel that the name is too on the nose."

Greg scratched the back of his neck and sheepishly responded, "What can I say? A crazy idea deserves a crazy name. It sounded better when I first came up with it in my head."

"Well, now that everything is set up and the resort has been properly christened," Pearl spoke up, checking off the remaining items off her list, "you all are set for tomorrow's grand opening. Best of luck with this new venture Greg."

"On the contraire," Greg said while raising a finger, "it's not christened until we show our derriere. Since we don't open till tomorrow, we might as well be the first to enjoy the clothing optional part of the place."

"I thought you'd never ask," Vidalia chimed in, already undoing the straps of her overalls. "How about we strip down on the count of three? Make it a group thing, keeps it all the more special."

Counting slowly to three, all four of them removed outer clothing until they reached to their undergarments. Once they reached three, the humans and the Gem hybrid shook off their underwear and flung it in the air like graduation caps.

Elated, Steven began jumping around and tapping his feet. "Whoa! Now that's what I call freedom! It feels like the whole world is giving me a hug right now!"

"Ah, enjoy the feeling kiddo. We're all going to be enjoying it this weekend," Greg assured, taking in the breeze flowing over his bare skin.

While the four enjoyed their newfound freedom and discussed how the weekend would pan out, the Gems simply looked at them, amused by their antics.

"Humans are such curious creatures," Pearl stated. "They never cease to amaze me with how contradicting they can be and yet…so happy."

"It's what we're fighting for," Garnet quipped, a relaxed grin on her face.

Amethyst rubbed her chin, deep in thought. "Hey, how come we don't ever get naked? People seem to enjoy it enough to make entire resorts and campgrounds for it. I wanna lose my skivvies too!"

"Well as you know, we're basically hard light constructs given a humanoid form," explained Pearl, "This includes the outfits that come attached to said forms. So to be naked in the same sense that Greg and Steve are right now, we simply have to shape shift to a nude form. No clothing removal necessary."

Amethyst pondered this for a bit then concluded, "So if our outfits are just another part of our bodies and we just need to shape shift to change them, does that mean that we've actually been naked all this time?"

Pearl started to interject but stopped as Amethyst's words started truly sinking in. Indeed, the rest of the Crystal Gems stood in silence as the same realization dawned on them, unable to refute or contradict the purple gem's logic.

"Well," deadpanned Lapis, "that's just indecent."