The mission should have been simple, it should have been fucking simple. It was just a pre-kishin in an urban area, easy enough to take care of. And it had been, till the second one had barrelled at them.
Soul had only just consumed the original target's soul when the second one had appeared. By the time it registered in his brain to fucking transform to help his partner the pre-kishin had swiped at him, sending him what felt like miles away from his meister. He had slammed into the ground and rolled, coming up disorientated.
Maka's scream of pain had centred him instantly.
The pre-kishin had grabbed her in one of its four fucking hands and was using another two to twist her arms upwards and then all the way around.
Soul had roared and raced at it, helplessly watching as it used a claw on its fourth hand to start to slice into Maka's skin. She couldn't fight back with her broken arms. She was still screaming when he sliced through the pre-kishin with a transformed arm.
She fell to the floor with a painful thump and Soul had been near hysterical when he called for back-up while cradling his meister, who couldn't stop tears of pain running down her cheeks but was still trying to reassure him that it was her fault for not sensing the second one.
He had sat in the waiting room of the nearest hospital while she had been operated on. When the doctor came out to tell him that the surgery had gone well, she was just going to need some physical therapy for her arms after plenty of rest, he had just nodded and followed after the doctor to Maka's room.
Soul was infinitely thankful for the DWMA's deal with hospitals: partners are always allowed in to see each other as soon as possible. She was still unconscious but the steady thrum of her soul brushing against his made him feel infinitely better. The knot in his chest loosened and he was able to breathe again as he pulled a chair to the side of her bed and sat.
He reached out a hand for hers and interlocked their fingers. He brushed his thumb against the back of her hand gently and listened to the beeps of the heart monitor. Then he leaned closer to her and brushed some hair from her face.
"You're an idiot," he whispered. He gulped and added, "Not for not sensing the fucking thing, but for blaming yourself."
He brushed her bangs back and couldn't help but brush the tips of his fingers down the side of her face. Her skin was smooth and it felt nice under his hand.
"I froze up." The knot that had been in his chest earlier tightened again and was suddenly heavy, weighing his shoulders down. "I should have transformed immediately but I didn't and you got hurt."
He gritted his teeth and inhaled deeply. He squeezed her hand and stroked her hair back repeatedly. "I'm sorry." His voice felt thick and uncooperative. He knew that if he spoke any louder than the murmuring he had been doing, his voice would break. "I'm sorry, this is my fault."
On impulse he leaned forward and pressed his lips to her forehead while he cupped her cheek and stroked the skin under her eye with his thumb. He stayed like that for a while, trying to get the stinging in his eyes to go away. One tear escaped and he brushed it away quickly and sniffed, reclining back in his chair.
"Uncool," he muttered, staring down at his lap.
Then he glanced back at Maka. He pulled her hand up a little and kissed her knuckles. Then he laid his head down on the side of her bed and closed his eyes.
"I love you," he murmured. "But you deserve better."