Written for last month's Geekfiction Food Fight. Prompts were fluffernutter & animal crackers.
Thank you to Kara for the read through.
I'd sure hate to break down here
Nothing up ahead or in the rearview mirror
Out in the middle of nowhere knowing
I'm in trouble if these wheels stop rolling
-Julie Roberts
Now that the funeral is over, she knows that it's really only a matter of time before she needs to leave. Once again, this city has only brought her pain and sorrow. The only good thing in her life, in this city, can't seem bring himself to see her through his own needs. Leaving him behind the first time almost broke her, leaving now will either kill her or make her whole.
She's not sure which she needs more right now.
"Do you want to go out to dinner?"
Sara breaks free of her thoughts as Grissom slides next to her at the kitchen counter. She can see the edge of worry in his eyes and can feel the weight of his grief. She smiles at him and pushes back from the table to stand upright.
"I don't really feel like it. Is there something here?" she walks over to the cabinets behind her and starts to poke at various boxes.
"I don't feel like cooking, do you? Maybe we can do take-out?"
Sara pulls out a jar of Fluff and holds it out to him, "Really?"
"What? You've never enjoyed a good 'fluffernutter'?" Grissom crosses his arm defensively.
"When I was five." She shakes her head and places the plastic container back on the shelf.
Grissom smiles out of the corner of his mouth, his voice suggestive. "I can think of more things we can use it for."
Sara pulls a face, "That stuff is a sticky nightmare gone bad. No way. And what adult has a jumbo tub of animal crackers?"
She holds up her hand to stay his protest, "What adult has a jumbo tub of animal crackers and doesn't have kids? What have you been buying?"
Grissom's face has turned slightly red and he mutters under his breath, "I like them."
Sara ignores him and continues to scavenge through his cabinets, "I can see that food shopping has not been a priority. We can fix that now that I'm back."
"So you're staying." His voice is quiet, laced with hope.
She turns slowly, knowing this conversation has been bound to happen. Knowing she can't avoid it for much longer. "You know I can't."
"No, I don't know. Can't you stay here and just be with me, forget about the job, forget about everything else and just be here?" The air between seems to fill with tension, the casual air gone in a second.
"Don't you see that it's not about you or the job, it's this place, this city? I can't go anywhere without being reminded of all that I've seen, all that's been done?" She reaches across the counter to grasp his hand, her eyes beseeching him to understand. "In another city, the surroundings are new and I can at least pretend that there is no ugly in the world, no horror."
He gently pulls his hand out of her grasp, "You mean that you can run and hide, bury your face in the sand and pretend that everything is perfect."
She recoils slightly from the bitterness in his voice. "That's not what I meant and you know it. You know what; I don't think I'm hungry after all."
She pushes past him, he tries to grab her hand but she moves just out of reach. She thinks it might be time to go.
She's already in bed, drifting in that space between awareness and oblivion. She feels the bed sink slightly under his weight when he climbs quietly into it. He rolls onto his side, facing her back and she hears him sigh.
"Are you awake?"
"Barely."
She hears him sigh again, "I'm sorry. I really am. I didn't mean those things I said."
She turns to face him, "I think you did."
"No, Sara. I think I understand why you need to leave but then again I don't. It just frustrates me that I can't make you stay and I took it out on you. For that I'm sorry. We can't go on like this."
She strokes the side of his face with her right hand, "No, we can't."
"You're still going to leave." He didn't say 'me', but the word hangs between them unspoken.
"You know how much I love you. So much, Griss. But its time to go."
"I know." He leans closer to her, bringing his lips against hers. His kiss is like breathing for her, she craves it and isn't sure how she's going to live without it.
Her breath catches at the sensual feel of his tongue, warm and smooth, tangling with hers. He drags his hand through her hair and continues to sucks gently on her tongue then stops and returns to gently teasing her, his tongue glides along her lips.
She sighs when he pulls back, her breathing labored. She opens her eyes and stares at him, willing him to listen to his own heart even though he can't hear hers.
Something flares in his eyes, an understanding of the end and he kisses her again, the edges of which are laced with desperation.
He lowers his body down to hers, this time slipping the head of his cock just inside her. He strokes down her back and then along her bottom. He runs his lips along her forehead and begins to move, in shallow thrusts, rhythmic and gentle.
The feeling of him sliding up inside her was perfect and she wants more. Clenching him tight, she starts to push against him, matching his rhythm. He groans and clutches her hips, pulling her higher and thrusts deeper.
She wiggles against him causing him to make a noise deep in his throat. She notices that he is trying to keep the pace slow and protests by pushing against him harder. He starts to plunge faster; she gasps and meets each parry and thrusts with those of her own.
He shudders, "Sara. Please…love…you."
Those words fuel her desire, clouding her eyes with her arousal. Grissom never thought he's ever seen something as beautiful.
He slides his hand down over her belly and then between her legs, pressing his thumb over her sex.
Oh my God. She looks into eyes hot with passion as he rubs it into a tight knot.
He presses his lips to hers, licking the corners of her mouth with a gentle touch.
Every inch of her skin is on fire as she explodes around him, drowning in this perfect sensation. Beneath her he tightens, his cock pressed deep inside her, his body stiff and vibrating over hers. With a growl, he gives a powerful thrust and pumps inside her.
And then he collapses over her, gathering her close as he does. When he lets out a deep sigh, she wraps her arms around him and waits for the inevitable.
His voice is tired, "Not everything here is bad, and I think we've made a few good memories."
She doesn't answer him because he still doesn't understand and it's not until she's in a taxi on the way to the airport that she realizes that he probably never will.
You said I was all you'd ever need
But love is blind and little did I know
That you were just another dead end road
Paved with pretty lies and broken dreams
.end