Naruto, waking up: Dude, I feel like I've been sleeping forever!

Sasuke: You do realize it's been about a year since Counie's updated, right?

Naruto: …What in the hell, really?

Counie: All I'm going to say is real life is a mothafuc-

Sasuke and Naruto: No excuses!

Counie:Haters gon ha-

Sasuke and Naruto: No!

Hey everyone! I deeply apologize for the lack of actual updates. I just finished my first year of college and it has been a wild, very time-consuming ride at my University. Although summer has started for me, I've been taking summer classes, looking for jobs and various things which has gotten in the way of my updates.

Plus, my original story was actually deleted; apparently, my rating on the story was G-rated instead of R-rated. Therefore, the story itself was removed from the site, which makes me quite sad considering all the reviews and comments that were left behind.

However, when in doubt, take things in stride. What I've decided to do is revamp and reload the chapters for everyone to see and keep this story going at a pace that I can do. So I hope you readers and reviewers can still enjoy and find my story a great leisure activity.

Well, without further ado, here's the first chapter!

"Goddammit, Naruto! We have four minutes, run for it!"

Well, I'm just going to be blunt with it.

"What? What the fuck? What happened to my five minutes!"

Sometimes, life is a bitch. And of course, because life is a bitch and stays abitch, it has puppies who like to shit all over your possible happy times. It's disgusting, believe me.

"Hurry it up, already! We do not have time for this at all!"

"Gaara, shut up! We've been here for two years already and a few weeks. I've got this! Just let me tie my shoe…"

Then, they magically turn into monkeys and throw that same shit at you, just literally to rub it in your face. Again, it's disgusting.

"Oh for the love of….the vending machine?"

"What? You mad, bro?"

And you think it's over, right? There seems to be nothing falling at you at the moment but oh no, wait till that same bitch starts throwing curveballs at you. You haven't had a moment to wipe the dust or the crap off your shoulders. All you can do is dodge and weave out of the way, as best you can and when you finally think it's over and done, that sweet, sweet moment of triumph and power…you get smacked right in between the legs.

"When…did…this hallway exist?"

"Naruto, just stop talking…"

No matter man or woman, that freaking hurts. It really, really does (it's especially painful when it's twice in a row…don't ask).

"Wow, I still can't believe we're still getting lost after so long! Why did our school not burn down that one time? Damn firefighters!"

"What did I say about talking?"

Yet, something weird happens. Out of nowhere, it sends something or someone to actually help you up and clean all the things you've got piled on top of you. You're dusted off nicely, cleaned off of all the crap and you're actually taken aback, surprised, happy and all of the above, you know? Hell, life might actually send you someone who has similar shit and pain piled up on them. You wipe his back while he wipes yours and so on. And the happy times can start.

"Wait, not that hallway. It's this way, come on, we have two minutes!"

"I'm not even going to response to that stupid ass obvious comment."

"You're the one going down the wrong hallway."

"Says you. The hallway moved on its own."

"What? Argh, you're such a crazy, idiotic doucheba-"

But sadly, that's just cliché as life's a bitch. This isn't a story or a movie. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying some unicorn can't come hither and sparkle for our delightful asses but do you see me waiting for one? Not that I would in the first place but you get my point here. I can't stress that enough.

But sometimes, when those times of happiness and peace, I don't quite so mind that is a bit bitchy.

"We made it, yes!"

Yeah, that's it.

- How the Beat Drops -

Okay, let me tell you, standing here like a jackass in front of the wrong classroom is always embarrassing as a motherfucker.

No, we actually didn't make it. Gaara was wrong. Remember that the hallway I saw? Oh yeah , that was the hot spot (or at least the shortest way to class). Thanks to this red-head over here, we ended up walking into a freshman Biology class while they were dissecting piglets (Don't ask how we still get lost when summer has been long gone). And fuck, is that really fucking awkward (Not to mention the really creepy looking kid who's breathing hard as he cuts the frog's head open…I don't remember that being a part of the assignment). I really wish we did make it in time but like I said, sometimes, life is a bitch. So get it? Got it? Good. Right now, I would really appreciate the nice life, the simple life or better yet, the life that's not going to count attendance when I get my ass to first period.

Oh boy.

"So, I guess this makes the 5th tardy, eh, Naruto?"

Who invented tardies?

Feeling my face flush a bit, I laugh nervously as the class groans from the lack of surprise and what seemed to be a lack of an actual joke. Since I'm a junior this year, my notorious antics of being late are no surprise and seem not to be too funny at all.

Except that one time there was a chicken infestation; that was kind of funny. And I'm not kidding you, there was a HUGE parade of chicken in the hallways.

"Uh, are you sure it's not less than that, teacher?" I said, gesturing at Gaara just for kicks a bit too loudly. He only proceeded to glare at me. Yeah, I know, I'm a jackass and an idiotic fuck full of nonsense.

"Well, let me go and change the attendance so the school just knows you're here now." Mr. Hatake says. He's my wonderfully weird teacher who, despite my constant excuses and "stupid" antics, allows me to stay in class and not lecture me on the rules of punctuality. He puts his chalk down and eases his way over to his computer desk. I awkwardly walk to my seat and glance behind me to catch how's Gaara's taking all this. Gaara settling himself behind me before sticking his tongue out. What a priss. Get over it.

"Hrm, well with that done-" Mr. Hatake begins to say before he hears another knock at his door. "Seriously? Maybe it's the delivery guy personally delivering the next issue of Icha Icha Paradise." Believe me, you don't want to know what that is. And for another note, I don't ever read what's on a teacher's desk. The consequences of being maimed are not worth it. My butt gets scared thinking about it. Anyway, Mr. Hatake is scratching his head before opening the door and poking his head out. "Ah, I guessed you'd be late, knowing how the principal is," I heard him say.

It's probably something unimportant.

"Well, I guess the interruption was perfect timing," I'm peaking up at this comment and watching Mr. Hatake swerve back into the room with a student behind him. Wait, this isn't….are you serious-

"Well, thanks to Naruto's great antic, the school has bestowed to us a little surprise. Today, class, we have a-"

Seriously? This cliché we have a-

"…transfer student today. It's the first few weeks of classes so it's not a big deal," I see Mr. Hatake laugh a little and I blink. Then I look at the new guy. He doesn't look too happy to see me.

In fact, I feel really, really weird and unease all of a sudden.

Houston, scratch out that sometimes.

Comment and Reviews are Highly Encouraged

See you next chapter!