You know what would've made Ralph Breaks the Internet better? If Turbo was in it. So here's the movie rewrite you didn't know you wanted, as well as the next (final?) installment in a fanfic series no one asked for! Before you start, please read my previous stories Turbo Takes the Throne, Torque-it Turbo, and Turbo: Legacy if you haven't already. Don't worry, they're short and can collectively be read in half an hour. Enjoy!
PS: I know I said I wasn't gonna make another sequel, but the ending of this movie left me with an opportunity to give Turbo a "proper" ending.
Turbo Crashes the Internet
By ERiN OPPEL
Chapter 1: Wreckquiem for a Dream
Blood pounded in his ears as Turbo charged through Game Central Station, panting with each stride. He kept his yellow eyes alert and did his best to avoid knocking into any Arcadians. "Out of the way, this is an emergency!"
Characters that saw or heard him coming were quick to leap out of his path; those that weren't fast enough got spun around.
His destination was in sight. Turbo turned on his heels and flew through the game's terminal without stopping for the Surge Protector.
A dark expanse with multicolored walls greeted him but he didn't have time to sight-see. Turbo found the irregular trails and followed alongside them until he passed a yellow warning sign. He skidded to a slow jog before he got too close to the danger zone and took a few cautious steps forward to get a better look.
And promptly burst out laughing.
"It's not funny!" Vanellope yelled, though her words were somewhat mispronounced due to her teeth being clenched together.
Also frozen in place beside her, Wreck-it Ralph demanded, "Hurry and fix it!"
But the embarrassing sight of Ralph and Vanellope paralyzed and glitching on their light cycles was too much and Turbo keeled over. "I'm sorry… I… I can't… help it!" he gasped between laughter, kicking his feet.
"TURBO!"
"Anytime, Tron!" Turbo waved before departing from the now virus-free game. His journey back into Game Central Station was much more leisurely. Some characters acknowledged him for repairing Tron, as he was the only one in the arcade skilled enough to manipulate code. It was something of a job he had, once he started to gain more trust. He was proud to have saved several games that would have otherwise been unplugged. Even so, not everyone accepted his presence.
He didn't really mind; he still had his friends and was content with living in Sugar Rush. The only thing that bugged him was that it had been six years since his unofficial acceptance into the arcade, and he still wasn't allowed to be part of the game proper. Every time he brought it up with Vanellope she'd just tell him she was still "possibly considering it". Eventually he just gave up, figuring she wasn't ever planning on letting him be a racer.
Turbo guessed he couldn't complain, though. For now he was fine, and the thought of his life being better someday was a nice dream to think about. Plus, Ralph and Vanellope being trapped in the Tron virus made his day.
A shadow casted over the power bar, interrupting the sunrise. Mr. Litwak's voice could be heard, "All right, let's get you plugged in."
An empty terminal suddenly came to life. The LED display above it started to load as the metal prongs of a plug were sliding slowly into place.
"That's a plug-in alert!" Vanellope exclaimed unnecessarily.
Everyone immediately rushed over to the aforementioned terminal, some bumping into Turbo on their way there.
"Hey, watch it!" Turbo rubbed his shoulder with eyes narrowed at the crowd gawking at the sign. "You'd think they'd never seen a new game being plugged in before," he mumbled. Then again, it had been a long time since Litwak had got one. The arcade instead had been losing more games in recent years, despite Turbo's maintenance. Perhaps arcades were becoming a dying breed. Curiosity getting the best of him, he hurried over and made his way to the front, next to Felix and Ralph with Vanellope on his shoulder.
"Please be a racing game," the little girl was saying.
It wasn't until she mentioned it that Turbo immediately hoped it wasn't. Though he would never repeat his past mistake, he dreaded the idea of Sugar Rush losing its popularity to a newer game, which would only decrease his chance of becoming playable. And he doubted the new one would let him join after doing a background check.
Finally the plug was in place and the display read: WI-FI.
Ralph squinted and pronounced, "Whiffy? Or is it Wifey?" He shrugged. "Well, it's either whiffleball, or an arranged marriage game."
Sonic spoke up matter-of-factly, "It's actually pronounced 'why-fye', Ralph."
"Yeah, that's what I said."
The blue hedgehog went on, "And Wi-Fi is the Internet! Which is an online community where human beings go to shop, play games, and socialize." His expression suddenly darkened. "Among… other things…"
Turbo asked, "What other things?" He wasn't prepared for Sonic to start shaking him by the shoulders though.
"You don't want to know!" Sonic shouted in his face while one of his eyes twitched. "Just whatever you do, stay away from DeviantArt!"
"Whoa, Sonic, how do you know all this?" Ralph inquired.
Turbo pried Sonic's hands off him and the hedgehog answered, "I have ears, Ralph. When people talk, I listen." He stared a thousand miles off into the distance. "But sometimes I wish I didn't…"
"Sonic's right." Surge Protector appeared in front of the terminal. "That sign up there says Wi-Fi. What it should say is 'Die-Fi'. That's a little humour there," he joked dryly, sticking caution tape across the entrance. "But seriously, the Internet is nothing to laugh at. It is new, it is different, and therefore we should fear it. So keep out, for Pete's sake, and get to work. The arcade's about to open."
Turbo wasn't too disappointed. While he was curious about what the Internet games were like, it didn't seem worth the risk, judging by Sonic's reaction. At least it hadn't been a racing game. Everything seemed to go back to normal as everyone returned to their own lives. Turbo sighed, figuring he should get back to his. "I'll be in Sugar Rush," he said to Ralph and Vanellope while they continued to stare at the Wi-Fi terminal. Without waiting for a response he turned around, and nearly bumped into Mario.
"What's-a this?" the plumber asked, gesturing to the new terminal. "Some type-a new game?"
Turbo huffed in annoyance. "It's the Internet, Mario. You didn't make it on time again."
Sonic, apparently back to his usual self, taunted from afar, "You're too slow!" Then he dashed off.
Mario glared after the hedgehog and muttered something possibly rude in Italian.
Turbo left the scene and started to head back to his game. The candy train was empty, so he took a seat at the front. The train waited a few seconds in case anyone else should board, but when no one did it rang its bell and departed for Sugar Rush.
The bright candy-coated world opened up as the train came to a stop. Turbo disembarked and made his way to his new garage, which he had built (this time with help) a couple years ago on Peppermint Ridge. It was much closer to civilization than his last place and not too far from his Turbo Time track and Strawberry Fields where his best friend Taffyta lived. He never missed one of her races, and his new home made watching them easier.
The sound of candy karts roared in the distance as Turbo walked along the track. Correction: one of the new tracks. He grimaced, remembering how Vanellope was able to unlock two new tracks during her brief stint as president when he never even knew that was possible in all his time as king. Sure, he was able to race on them after hours, but it would've been nice to try them while he was still playable.
Speaking of the glitch, she zoomed right up beside him in her kart and slammed on the brakes, showering him with chocolate dirt. "Hey, Turbo! I got something to tell you back at the castle!"
He coughed and brushed the dust off his jumpsuit. Then he raised a puzzled brow at her. "You can't tell me now, right here?"
"Castle! Now!" she ordered sharply, then tore off before Turbo could protest.
The white racer sighed and changed direction. "What does she want this time?"
Vanellope sat very regally in her kart in front of her throne. Or at least she tried to. It was still hard for Turbo to take her fail-tastic kart seriously. Something was different about her, though. Normally when she summoned him Vanellope was always snarky or condescending. But this time when she saw Turbo enter the throne room she seemed much more friendly. It made him uncomfortable.
Turbo opened his mouth to comment on that, but Vanellope silenced him with a wave of her scepter.
"Ah-bup-bup-bup! Remember, I talk first," she stated with a grin, making Turbo roll his eyes. "Over the past six years you've made a lot of progress. I never thought I'd get to the point where I actually start trusting you. Not to mention that after hours you look like a pretty good racer. Which made me remember that possible request from a while back."
Turbo lit up hopefully. "Wait, are you saying that you're gonna move on from possibly considering my request to considering it?"
"Nope!"
All his hope vanished. "Oh."
"I'm gonna go straight to granting it!"
And then it came back just as quickly. "Really?"
"Yep! Well, there's not enough time right now, but first thing tonight I'm gonna fully integrate your code so that you can be a playable racer!"
Turbo couldn't believe his ears. This was almost too good to be true! Wait, what if it was too good to be true? He stared at her warily and accused, "This is a trick, isn't it? You plan to glitch my car? Turn me into a recolor? Delete my code in my sleep?"
"What? No!" Vanellope frowned. "Would I lie to you?"
Turbo lowered his eyelids in disapproval.
Vanellope amended, "Ok, sure, but this time I really mean it. You'd be a good playable character. I honestly believe you'll bring something new to the track."
Turbo smiled thoughtfully. That wasn't a compliment he'd heard before. But still, he had to be sure. "So that's it? After six years of not interfering with the game, you're just gonna make me a racer?"
"Yeah, you're getting just what you wanted! Isn't that great? I call it a win-win!"
"Ok, I'm not sure how it'll benefit you on your end, but hey, not complaining!" And here he thought she was miffed that he laughed at her earlier. Turbo's grin became even wider and he bounced excitedly on his toes. "Turbo-tastic! I'm gonna be a racer! Again!"
Vanellope squealed, "I know! I'm so happy! Er, for you!" She cleared her throat. "Sorry, happiness is contagious. Oh look, a quarter alert!"
"I didn't hear any-"
"Quarter alert!" the announcer cheerfully notified.
Vanellope started her kart. "Gotta go! Mark my words, you're gonna be on the roster tomorrow!" With that she sped out of her throne room.
Turbo continued to celebrate on his own. "This is it! It's finally happening!" he cheered, leaping jubilantly around the room. Noticing Sour Bill by the door, he said, "Sour Bill, guess what? I'm gonna be a racer!"
The green ball's droopy eyes turned to him. "I know. I was here the whole time."
Turbo skipped out of the room, meeting up with Wynnchel and Duncan. "Hey guys! I'm gonna be a racer!" He bounded down the hall singing, "S-U-G-A-R, jump into your racing car, say Sugar Rush! Sugar Rush!"
"Huh, just when you think you know someone," commented Duncan, watching him leave.
As he passed several candy citizens on their way to the default track, Turbo happily let them know about his future status. He could see the other racers lining up at the start in the distance and knew the game was about to begin. He'd have to tell Taffyta the good news later. For now, he went over to his garage.
The ridge was located high enough where he got a good view of each of the tracks but not visible from the gamer's perspective. After jumping into his Turbomobile, he grabbed a lollipop from his pocket to snack on and leaned back. Soon, the race began. As Turbo so often did, he imagined himself racing with them, but now with a lot more meaning since he knew he would truly be with them tomorrow.
Vanellope was the chosen avatar, as usual. Most gamers selected her for her glitching ability, which was so broken that it made her win pretty much all the time. As a result, some races became rather boring and often left Taffyta in a bad mood.
This race seemed no different. Vanellope had already pulled way ahead into the lead and was close to the finish line.
Turbo grumbled in disappointment and tossed away his finished lollipop stick. "Oh well. I'll remind her who's the greatest racer tomorrow." Then he almost felt guilty. Vanellope was the one who was giving him another chance and he never even thanked her for it. But then he remembered all the suffering she put him through and he didn't feel so bad.
Movement beside the track caught his eye and he saw a path that he never noticed before. The one clearing the rubble away was none other than Wreck-it Ralph. Turbo bolted up with his hands on the hood of his car. "Ralph?!" he cried in alarm. "What are you doing?! Ralph! Stop!"
Worse yet, Vanellope took a detour right onto the track Ralph made, apparently against the player's control.
"Vanellope, you idiot! You can play on the new track later! After you make me a racer!"
Suddenly he heard more commotion from the gamers outside. It sounded like the girl playing as Vanellope was really struggling to control her. Panic started to flood through Turbo. If there was one rule he always stuck to, it was never, ever fight the gamer. No matter how many walls they drove you into.
A loud snap rumbled throughout the console and Turbo flinched. At the same moment Vanellope crashed her car, putting her out of the race. Just as he feared, something had gone wrong. Unable to wait another second, Turbo started his car and drove towards the track.
He parked behind the stands and ran over to where Ralph, Vanellope, and the other racers were gathered, but made sure he stayed out of view of the live camera.
"Mr. Litwak, the Vanellope racer wasn't working," the gamer was saying apologetically, "and I think maybe I turned the wheel too hard. I'm really sorry."
The arcade owner said, "Oh, it's ok, Swati. I think I can get it back on there pretty easily." He tried sticking the wheel onto the console.
"What did you do, Ralph?" Taffyta hissed with her arms crossed.
Ralph denied, "I didn't do anything, Taffyta."
Turbo leaned closer to keep his voice low. "Don't talk to her that way, I saw you making that track!" he defended, then glared at Vanellope. "And don't get me started on you!"
The princess scoffed, but before she could reply they heard another snap, this time from the steering wheel being accidentally broken in half.
Ralph remained calm. "Ok, it's still not a problem. He'll just order a new part."
"Well, I'd order a new part," said Litwak, standing back with a grim look, "but the company that made Sugar Rush went out of business years ago."
"Since when?!" Turbo gasped, then Ralph's giant hand covered his face and he remembered he was supposed to be quiet.
Another gamer spoke up, "I could try to find them on the Internet."
Mr. Litwak looked doubtful. "Good luck. You're only gonna be looking for a needle in a—"
"I got one! On eBay!" Swati showed her phone to Mr. Litwak.
He squinted at the small screen. "Are you kidding me? $200? That's more than this game makes in a year! I hate to say it, but my salvage guys are coming on Friday. It might be time to sell Sugar Rush for parts."
Turbo went cold from the shock. For a moment time slowed and echoes of Litwak's words spun in his head, trying to process what was happening. It felt like a nightmare, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't wake up.
It wasn't until Ralph spoke that he finally snapped out of it. "Litwak's gonna unplug the game!"
At once everyone started to run for the exit in panic. Reacting on instinct, Turbo grabbed Taffyta's hand and made a dash for his car. "We gotta get out of here!" He practically shoved her onto the back while he jumped in the seat. "Hang on!" he said, flooring the pedal.
Taffyta yelped from the sudden acceleration but she kept her grip. "Hurry, Turbo!"
Colors blurred together and the frightful screams of fleeing Sugar Rush residents became like one sound as Turbo expertly weaved through the crowds. All he could think about was escaping. Escape before the game gets unplugged. Escape before your code gets imprisoned forever. Escape and return to Turbo Time. He blinked quickly, suddenly unsure what was a flashback and what was now.
No, focus, Turbo, he mentally commanded, eyes narrowing in concentration. They were coming up to the top of the Rainbow Bridge. The candy train had been crushed under the stampede of citizens that had come before them, leaving Turbo with no choice but to use the remains as a ramp to launch his car into the tunnel.
Sparks flew from the tires. Turbo swerved to avoid mowing down other characters. After what seemed like an eternity, light poured into the tunnel as they neared Game Central Station, but the plug was almost disconnected.
Escape. Escape. Escape.
With one last boost, Turbo flew out of the terminal. He may have hit the Surge Protector on his way in, but his mind was more relieved at the fact that he made it. Turbo braked and turned to the side, nearly tipping his car over. He stayed sitting down with his hands keeping a death grip on the wheel. I'm alive. I made it. I'm alive, he repeated to himself, trying to calm his racing heart. He glanced over his shoulder to make sure Taffyta was ok.
Thankfully she had made it as well, despite her hair being a little frazzled. She let go of his car and shared a worried gaze with him before looking back at the terminal.
The plug was removed just as the last of the citizens crossed through, and the LED screen went dark.
"We're homeless!" yelled Wynnchel. He and Duncan started to sob as they hugged each other.
More cries echoed similar sentiments. Homelessness was a feeling Turbo knew all too well. Memories of the previous time flashed in his mind and soon he realized he was hyperventilating. "No… No, no, NO, IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!" he screamed, holding himself tight. "I can't go back in the walls! I just can't!"
Nearby crying brought Turbo to his senses; Taffyta had lost her composure and wept pitifully. Realizing he needed to be strong for her, Turbo got out of his car and hugged her soothingly. "Don't worry, Taffyta. Everything is going to be all right."
She sniffed, her head still buried in his chest. "You r-really think s-so?"
Turbo frowned. There was no point in lying to her; she wouldn't believe him anyway. "No," he answered miserably.
Everything he'd worked for… The happy life he'd earned… His dream of becoming a real racer again…
Gone.
I'm gonna try to stick as close to the movie as possible, but as you can see some dialogue will be added/changed. I know it's a little rusty, so please tell me what you liked or if anything could be improved! However, flames will not be tolerated. Save your wangst for a therapist.