Disclaimer: It's not mine. And for once, I'm glad it belongs to Shonda. Because when it comes to Meredith and Derek, she's finally redeemed herself.
This is my usual post-season finale one shot. I'm already completely in love with little Bailey, and couldn't resist writing a fic about his addition to the Shepherd family. The lyrics used for the title are borrowed from Taylor Swift's "The Best Day." Enjoy!
...
May 19, 2013
It's late when Bailey finally falls asleep after nursing, and every parenting book out there would advise them to sleep, too. But all they can do is look at him. They've already memorized every tiny, perfect detail of their son, like the way the ends of his hair curl when it's wet after his bath, the result of being half Derek. And the way he scrunches his nose in his sleep, trademark Meredith.
"I don't know how these little feet kicked me so hard," she says, running her fingers over Bailey's pea-sized toes.
"He just wanted to remind you that he was in there," Derek laughs softly. He turns toward his nightstand, and picks up the small, white hospital bracelet that they took off the baby's wrist when they got home after being discharged earlier in the day, as well as the name card that was tucked into his bassinette.
Bailey Christopher Shepherd. DOB: May 16, 2013.
Weight: 6 lbs., 10 oz. Height: 19 in.
Baby's mother: Grey, Meredith
Baby's father: Shepherd, Derek C.
And underneath, written in pink marker, Baby's sister: Zola.
Derek smiles when he recalls how Zola insisted on having herself represented on the card, already his devoted big sister, pledging lifelong love and protection of her little brother.
"We need to put those in his baby book," Meredith says, Bailey cuddled close to her chest. She leans down and presses a kiss to his forehead. "Zola loves you so much, Bay."
"She even gave you that nickname, buddy," Derek tells him.
Bailey opens his eyes and yawns, looking up at both of them with his matching pair of calm, bright blue irises. It's as though he already knows he's safe and loved, and always would be.
"Oops. We didn't mean to wake you up. We're just kind of obsessed with you," Meredith says.
"That's putting it mildly," Derek teases. "I think he'll forgive us, though. We waited a long time for you and Zozo, Bailey. We get to be a little smitten."
"So I was thinking... how about Bailey for his godmother? Makes sense, right?" Meredith asks.
Derek wraps his arm around her shoulder and smiles. "She saved your life. I can't think of a better way to honor her," he says. "You know, besides naming our kid after her. I think she's still speechless about that."
"Yeah, that was a first," Meredith giggles. "Any thoughts on a godfather?"
The word Mark almost leaves his mouth until he remembers that he's dead, and has been for nearly a year. It hurts him that his best friend will never meet Bailey. That he's not around to give Derek a pat on his back and tell him that his son's you-know-what is impressively sized. Or that they'll never go to a Yankees-Mariners game, just the three of them. And that Bailey will only know about Mark from pictures and stories they share with him.
Meredith can almost read his mind, and she squeezes his hand. "I'm sorry," she whispers.
"Me, too," Derek nods, pursing his lips to fight back the lump in his throat. "I do have someone in mind, though. What about Karev?"
Meredith smiles at the suggestion, the same one she was going to make. "Yeah?"
"There were almost twenty babies in the NICU that night. But the second I walked in with Bailey, he made him his priority. And he didn't leave his side when I went to come see you. The way I see it, it would be wrong to pick anyone but him," Derek says genuinely.
"Okay, then. Looks like you have godparents picked out, Bay," Meredith says, tickling Bailey's rounded belly over his elephant pajamas. He lets out a barely audible coo, and the sound makes Meredith's heart flutter.
Their bedroom door opens with a slight creak, and Zola appears in their doorway. "Where's Bay?"
"He's with Mommy and Daddy. Why are you up, Princess?" Derek asks as she walks over to his side of the bed.
"I getted up to pee, and Bay wasn't in his cribby," Zola replies. She reaches her arms up and Derek scoops her into his lap.
"Bailey wakes up a lot during the night to eat, so he's going to be sleeping in here with us for a while, just like you did when you were a baby," Meredith explains, hoping it makes sense, and that Zola doesn't feel left out of their family time. Even though Bailey's only been home for a few hours, they're doing their best to include Zola in everything.
"Oh," Zola accepts. She cuddles herself between her parents, and turns her attention to the baby in Meredith's arm. "I hold him?"
They both look at each other, and nod in agreement. She's sandwiched between them, surrounded by pillows, so now is as good a time as any. "Yeah, you can hold him," Derek says, putting a pillow behind her back.
"Fold your arms like you do when you cradle your dolls," Meredith coaches her. Once Zola is in position, she carefully places Bailey in her arms. The baby fusses slightly when he's taken away from the warmth of his mom, and he looks up at Meredith with the same broody expression Derek gets when he's peeved.
"You look just like Daddy when you make that face," she can't help but laugh.
"I don't make that face," Derek argues.
Meredith rolls her eyes in good-natured humor. "You're making it right now."
Bailey pops his thumb into his mouth when he's finally settled in Zola's arms, and stares at his big sister in quiet fascination. Meredith and Derek both know the admiration won't last forever, and soon enough, Bailey will invade her tea parties with pirate ship attacks, and Zola will try to dress him in princess gowns against his will for said tea parties. So they savor every second of the peace while it lasts.
"Hi, Bay. Are you seepy?" she asks him, smoothing her hand over his dark hair.
"He should be sleepy. He had a busy day today," Meredith says, a hand over her lower abdomen as she shifts in bed.
"Sore?" Derek asks in concern.
"A little, yeah," she shrugs. "I'm okay, though."
"Well, there's one upside to having a C-section. At least you didn't poop on the table," Derek points out.
Meredith looks over at him and smirks. "Funny man."
Bailey's eyes grow heavy when Zola begins patting his diapered bottom the same way her parents do to soothe him. When she starts humming the Malawian lullaby they sing to her, the baby slips back into sleep with his hand wrapped around Zola's finger.
For someone who's only been a big sister for three days, Zola's got it down to a science.
...
May 23, 2013
Bailey is officially a week old, and the Shepherd household operated under the principle of organized chaos. Nearly every square inch is occupied by something newborn-related: diapers, wipes, blankets, onesies, pacifiers, and burp cloths galore. They're slowly getting Bailey and Zola into a routine, now that their time has to be divided equally between both children, and so far, the adjustment is smoother than Meredith had expected it to be.
The only thing she's still trying to master is diaper changing. With Zola, it was easy: take old diaper off, wipe, put new diaper on. But Bailey's a different story, and Meredith is fairly certain that her son's favorite pastime is peeing. On everything.
Derek and Zola are at the playground for some much needed one-on-one time, and Meredith stayed home for some quiet time with Bailey and took a much needed nap. She falls asleep with Bailey on her chest, and he lets her sleep for an hour before his whimpers wake her up.
"You okay, sweet pea?" she asks. She peeks into the back of his diaper, and finds the source of his displeasure. "Uh oh. We should've saved this one for Daddy."
Meredith lays Bailey down on the bed, then reaches for the diaper supplies that have overtaken Derek's nightstand. Once she wiggles Bailey's pants off and unsnaps the onesie underneath, she peels back the adhesive tabs on his diaper. As she wipes him, she buries her nose in her shoulder.
"Oh Bailey, you stink."
Bailey blows a bubble with his mouth, unfazed, and Meredith smiles at him. "Even covered in poop, you're still the cutest little boy I've ever seen," she praises.
After cleaning him, she throws away the old diaper, and slips the new one under Bailey's tiny bottom. Just when she thinks she's in the clear, Bailey decides he can't wait fifteen seconds longer, and it happens. A geyser of pee shoots north like a fountain, and before Meredith has a chance to snap into action, he's christened her.
"Having trouble in here?" Derek asks, walking into their bedroom, unable to hide his amusement.
Meredith feels his stubble when he sits next to her on the bed and kisses her cheek. "He peed on me again. I'm still not used to penises," she says, and as soon as the words leave her mouth, she doesn't even need to glance at him to know there's dirty written all over his face.
"There I disagree," he grins, patting Bailey dry.
"I'm not used to baby penises that pee all over me," Meredith amends. "Did you just get home?"
"Yeah. Zo's downstairs setting up for a tea party," Derek chuckles as he pulls something from his pocket. "But first, I got you a present."
He shows her a blue, cone-shaped contraption covered in orange cartoon fish, and she stares at it in curiosity. "What is this?"
"A peepee teepee. Zo and I picked it up at the store after we went to the playground," Derek says. He places it over Bailey's boy parts, then looks over at her. "Now if he pees, it'll be in the teepee, and not all over us."
Meredith laughs. "How did you even know these existed?"
"Five nephews," he answers. "These things were a lifesaver when Uncle Derek had to babysit."
"Isn't this cool, Bailey? Now you can pee all you want without it ending up on Mommy all the time," she tells him sweetly, taking the teepee off to fasten the diaper around his waist.
Derek snaps the onesie between the baby's legs, then shimmies his pants back on. "Ready for your sister's tea party, Bay? It's your first of many, so you're the guest of honor," he jokes, picking Bailey up and propping him over his shoulder.
"Zola might make you wear a princess crown, buddy," she warns him, kissing the back of her son's head.
"She made me buy him the matching prince one at the store today. Apparently, the princess crown is reserved for me indefinitely," Derek says in stride.
"Cristina was right," Meredith says, the three of them walking out of the bedroom toward the stairs.
"About what?"
"She said a few weeks ago at lunch, Zola put applesauce in her ear, and you were enchanted. She's got you wrapped around her little finger," Meredith accuses playfully. "Then again, Bailey pees on me all day long, and I still think it's cute."
Derek smiles, putting his hand on the small of her back. "Wouldn't have it any other way."
...
June 2, 2013
The only thing better than maternity leave is the added bonus of the paternity leave that Derek gets, too. Meredith has gotten so used to having him around that when he's not home, it feels oddly strange and unbalanced. So when Owen calls, almost begging for Derek to come in and do neuro trauma consults after a building collapse, he can't very well say no, which means Meredith is on her own for a while.
Bailey woke up in a fussy mood that morning, a stark contrast from his usually happy, pleasant self. He's been clingy all day, and if Meredith even attempts to put him down to take a thirty second trip to the bathroom, the big crocodile tears are enough to break her heart.
"Bay okay, Mama?" Zola asks, curled up on the couch with her coloring book and crayons.
Meredith nods and sits down on the adjacent cushion. "Yeah, he's okay, Lovebug. He's just gassy. But I gave him some belly medicine to help him," she assures her. She pulls the nursing pillow onto her lap, then unbuttons Derek's dress shirt that she's wearing with her free hand. Nursing soothes her son like nothing else, so if that's what it takes to provide him with some relief of the tummy troubles, she's happy to do it, even though she's had to pee for three hours.
As soon as Bailey latches, he places his hand on her chest and shuts his eyes. Meredith leans down and kisses Bailey's dark head of hair that smells like his shampoo. "I love you, Bay," she whispers.
"I give him a kiss?" Zola asks, setting her blue crayon in the crease of her coloring book.
"Of course you can."
Zola shuffles closer to the two of them, gently kissing Bailey's chubby hand, and Meredith smiles at the gesture. "Are you happy that you have a little brother, Zozo?"
"I love him forever, like you and Daddy love me, 'cause we ohana," she says wisely.
Meredith wraps her free arm around Zola, snuggling her close. "That's right, Zo."
Zola and Meredith chit chat even after Bailey is finished nursing, asleep in her arm. They discuss a myriad of topics, including the latest happenings in daycare, even though Zola hasn't been there since Bailey was born. And it turns out, the Grey-Sloan daycare is chock full of as much drama and intrigue as the rest of the hospital. Zola tells her that Ryan and Sienna kissed in the playhouse, a scandalous act by toddler standards, how Dominic gets sent to timeout every day for throwing blocks, and how she and Nathan always share snacks at story time.
Meredith considers sparing Nathan's three year old self from potential interrogation by keeping the latest reveal a secret from Derek. If he has any say in the matter, his little princess won't date until she's thirty, and even then, no one will ever live up to his standards.
An hour passes when Meredith decides to press her luck. "Hey, Zo. Want to be Mommy's special helper?"
"Uh huh!" Zola says eagerly.
"If I take a quick shower, will you watch Bay for me?" she asks.
Zola is tickled by the opportunity to do something big sister-ish, and she nods emphatically. "Yeah!"
The two quietly trek upstairs to the master bedroom, and Meredith holds her breath as she puts Bailey in his swing next to Derek's dresser. She latches the buckle in place and sets the swing speed on low, hoping the motion will keep him sleeping soundly.
Zola settles herself on the floor next to the swing with her coloring book, and Meredith sneaks off into the bathroom where she finally gets the chance to empty her bladder and undress at the same time.
Over the past few weeks, she's perfected the five minute shower, which has become more of a necessity rather than a luxury, especially when she can no longer decipher if the stains on her shirt are breastmilk, spit up, yogurt, or toothpaste.
Meredith is just washing the conditioner out of her hair when she hears Bailey crying over the monitor sitting on the bathroom counter. "Crap," she whispers, peeking her head out of the glass door. "I'll be right there, Zo!"
She gives herself ten more seconds to rinse off, then wraps herself in a towel as quick as she can. But when she walks into the bedroom soaking wet, she's only met with the quiet calm in which she left it, and Bailey is in his swing sucking his thumb, happy as a clam.
"Is he okay?" Meredith asks, the ends of her hair dripping water onto the floor.
"Yeah. He was crying 'cause his sleeve was over his hand. I rolled it up, so he could suck his thumb," Zola simply shrugs, keeping her attention on Bailey, who's mesmerized by the game of peekaboo she's playing with him.
Meredith isn't sure whether to smile or cry at the maturity of her daughter, and the inherent mommy instincts that she already possesses. And when Zola offers to watch him while she dries off and gets dressed, Meredith knows she's never been more proud.
...
June 16, 2013
Bailey turns one month old on Father's Day, and this year, Derek has double the reasons to celebrate. He and Bailey sit on a blanket in the backyard, donning matching Yankees t-shirts, a gift from Meredith and Zola in preparation for the game later on tonight. And along with the blue eyes, and dark, curly hair, it's clear that when it comes to DNA, the Shepherd genes dominate.
"We did make him together, right? I was there for that?" Meredith jokes, sitting next to them on the blanket.
Derek shoots her a grin. "If I recall, you were very active in that process. Active and vocal."
"Okay. Just checking."
"Maybe if the next one's a girl, she'll look like you," Derek says, mostly to see her reaction.
Meredith tosses a piece of popcorn at him and laughs. "If your super magic sperm get me pregnant again, I better get to push the next one out. I'm running out of internal organs that always seem to be up for grabs when I'm open on the table."
"I'll make sure you get to push, even if it means delivering the baby myself," Derek promises.
"Okay, then."
Zola is dancing around on the grass in her Snow White gown, accessorizing it with Derek's much worn crown. He tried his best to get her to wear Yankee pride, too, but she opted for glitz and glimmer instead. When she does a cartwheel on the lawn that she learned at kiddie gym, Bailey's eyes grow wide, in awe of his big sister.
"You love Zozo, huh?" Derek asks his son, bouncing him gently on his knee.
"A year from now, you'll be walking, so you can run around and play with her," Meredith says. "No rush, though. It's like I blinked, and you're already a month old. You can take all the time you want to grow up."
Zola walks over to them and sits on the blanket to get a drink from her juice box. After taking a sip and putting it back in the cooler, she nuzzles her nose against Bailey's. "Love you, Bay."
Meredith nearly chokes on her bite of sandwich when she sees what happens next. For the first time, Bailey smiles. And it's not the gassy kind, but a real, true, honest to God smile that dimples his cheeks.
Zola gasps. "He smiled at me!"
"You got the first smile out of him! Good job, Lovebug!" Meredith praises her.
Derek hooks his arm around Zola's waist and kisses her cheek, reveling in the way she giggles when his stubble tickles her face. "That was the best Father's Day gift I could ever get. Thank you, Princess."
Unable to hold out a minute longer, Meredith steals Bailey from Derek and hugs him close. He's squishy and warm, and has that newborn smell she wishes she could bottle. Bailey rests his head on Meredith's shoulder, and when she turns her head to kiss him, he gives her another gummy smile, as though it's his own way of saying I love you, too.
It still shocks Meredith how much these tiny people rely on her and Derek for everything, but not as much as it shocks her that they even exist in the first place, and that they get to call themselves their parents. If that's what it means to be enchanted by an earful of applesauce, and getting peed on in the dark at three in the morning, neither of them would trade it for all the princess crowns in the world.
It's the age of princesses and pirate ships
And the seven dwarfs
Daddy's smart
And you're the prettiest lady in the whole wide world