Pairing: Puck/Rachel
Rating: T
Word Count: 6500+
Author's Note: So this was just supposed to be a "drabble" for the Puck/Rachel Drabble Meme over on LiveJournal (because I'm allowing myself to write P/R drabbles.) However, I don't know how to write anything short and this is the result.
The prompt comes from kimmy_77 and it's this: "Once upon a time there was a girl I knew, who lived across the street. Brown hair, brown eyes. When she smiled, I smiled. When she cried, I cried. Every single thing that ever happened to me that mattered, in some way, had to do with her. That day Winnie and I promised each other that no matter what, we'd be together. It was a promise full of passion and truth and wisdom. It was the kind of promise that can only come from the hearts of the very young." ~Kevin Arnold on The Wonder Years
And Because The Wonder Years is the other show that I adore besides Glee, I also pulled from this quote from the series finale: "Growing up happens in a heartbeat. One day you're in diapers; the next day you're gone. But the memories of childhood stay with you for the long haul."
It's on a June afternoon with the sun baking down on Cooper Street that he first notices her. She has pigtails and big brown eyes and, even at nine years old, he notices her. Her legs are long and skinny, encased in frilly pink socks. Her shoes are shiny patent leather and she has on a pink dress and is wearing the kind of smile that lights up the entire street. She stands calmly on the sidewalk, watching as two men unload boxes from the big truck and takes them inside the house.
"Noah! Noah!" Finn prods, trying to get his attention back on the football game they were playing and away from the skinny girl leaning on the BMW.
Noah pulls his eyes away from the girl and back toward his best friend. "Huh?"
"Are we gonna play? Mom says I hafta be home by 4."
Noah nods and runs back out into the street, his arms up for Finn to toss him the ball. When he catches it, he yells a little louder than normal and the little girl swivels her head towards them. She beams a big smile at them and bounds out into the street, skidding to a stop in front of them.
"Hello!" her voice is happy and strong and Noah notices that she has a big mouth and really white teeth. "My name is Rachel Berry and my fathers and I are moving in today. Will we be going to school together? I hope so because I would love to make new friends. I don't normally like to play with boys but since I'm new in town, I can make an exception because, after all, friends are friends."
Noah and Finn look at each other and then back at the babbling girl in front of them. "Who has two dads? Where's your mommy?" Finn asks.
Rachel wrinkled up her nose, places a hand on her bony hip in defiance, and argues, "Not everyone needs a mommy! I was born out of love and so two daddies are way better than a mommy and a daddy because, sometimes, mommies and daddies don't even love each other. My daddies love each other and they both love me so my family is really lucky."
Noah makes a confused face at Rachel and says, "That's weird."
Rachel just ignores him and turns her attention toward Finn when he says, "I don't have a dad." Rachel's face falls and she puts her hand on Finn's arm. Noah watches as Finn blushes and gives Rachel a stupid smile.
"Yeah, well, my dad's a drunk," Noah counters. Rachel's hand is suddenly no longer on Finn's arm but on his instead. Her hand is warm and soft and when she smiles up at him, her face is full of kindness. It makes his stomach burn in a weird way so he excuses himself to go inside and have a snack.
…
By the time school starts, he and Finn and Rachel have spent a lot of time playing. She's not so bad, for a girl. She talks a lot and she loves Disney musicals and Broadway and sometimes, he wants to hit her but he can't because he's not allowed to hit girls. So instead, he just says mean things to her to make her cry. But when the tears are rolling down her cheeks, he feels like a big jerk and apologizes. And then she gives him that huge smile that makes his cheeks turn red and they're friends again. She likes to climb trees and she's not afraid to pick up bugs or go looking under rocks for snakes so really, as far as girls go, she's one of the coolest around.
When he's eleven, his dad goes to work one day and never comes home. His little sister is only three and doesn't seem to notice that Daddy's gone but Noah does. His mom cries a lot and yells at him way more than she used to. After she screams at him for spilling the milk all over the kitchen floor, he stomps outside and sits down on the curb, his face in his hands. He watches an ant crawl over his shoe and then, once it's safely on the other side, he grins and grinds it into the concrete with his toe.
"Ants have feelings, too, Noah."
The little boy lifts his head and sees Rachel standing there. He almost laughs at her because she looks like a huge grape today with a purple dress, purple tights, and blue shoes on. She has a big pink and purple striped bow in her hair and she is glaring down at him, her arms crossed.
"It's just a stupid ant, Rachel," Noah mutters.
"But an ant is a living creature and that ant could have been someone's mommy or daddy and now it's dead."
Noah scowls at the word "daddy" and says, "Well, if it was a dad, it was probably a bad dad anyway."
Rachel puts her hand on his knee and gives him that same smile she's given him a hundred times before. "I'm sorry about your daddy. Are you doing okay?"
Noah pushes her hand away and says, "I'm fine. He was a creep anyway. I'm glad he's gone." He can see that Rachel doesn't believe him and it makes him mad.
"It's okay to be sad," she says.
"I'm not sad!" he yells. "Dad was a jerk and he was always yelling at us. I hope he never, ever comes back because I don't want to see his stupid face again."
He looks away from Rachel and stares down the street toward Finn's house. He jumps, though, when he feels Rachel's fingers lace with his. "You're the man of the house now. That comes with a lot of responsibility, you know. But I know you and you'll be fine."
"I know," Noah says quickly. His stomach starts to hurt when they're sitting there, their fingers linked together, but he thinks that's because he's really nervous about having to step up and be a man. He's been thinking about that a lot. He hears his mom crying to his grandma about how she doesn't know how she's going to pay the bills so he's been thinking about starting a paper route or maybe mowing grass for money. If it means his mom cries less, he'll do anything.
"I know it doesn't seem like it's true but I promise that it'll be okay," she tells him.
"Whatever," is all he says back to her. He doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He wants to sit on the curb and smoosh ants with his shoe and not have to have a stupid conversation with a girl about his stupid dad.
Rachel stares at him for a little bit. He ignores her and is actually relieved when she finally stands up after her daddy starts calling for her. But before she leaves, she gives Noah a pat on the head before she flits back across Cooper Street. He scowls at her until she's inside her house.
…
Two days later, he mows his first yard and makes ten bucks. He tries to give it to his mom but she just cries and hugs him, kissing the top of his head as she tells him that he's a big boy and that she's proud of him. He loves making his mom happy and making money and decides that maybe being the man of the house isn't so bad after all. And he knows that Rachel's right, he will be fine.
When he's 13, he decides that the name "Noah" is fitting for a little boy but not him. "Puck" is a much cooler name and it makes him feel more grown up and kind of strong. The first day of school, he and Finn are waiting at the Cooper Street bus stop when they see a girl walking toward them. She's in a really short skirt and her legs are tan. One of the sophomore boys whistles and Puck laughs because, yeah, she's pretty hot.
"Hey Puck, that's Rachel!" Finn exclaims when the girl gets closer.
"Hello Noah, Finn," Rachel says once she's standing there. She tucks a piece of long hair behind her ear and looks down at her feet.
"You look really pretty," Finn tells her, his eyes all wide and stupid looking.
"Don't call me Noah anymore, Rachel. Call me Puck," he tells her, rolling his eyes when she looks confused.
Rachel's eyes go wide and she says, "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Your name is Noah, Noah!"
"Call me Puck, dammit," he grits out, his chest puffed out so that he looks tougher because the older boys are watching. He watches Rachel's eyes turn watery and he feels crappy because he's never sworn at her before. When she turns her back on him, he feels a sharp pain in his stomach. Rachel focuses on Finn and she's laughing at something he says.
When the bus finally shows up, he sits in the seat behind Rachel and kicks the bottom of it most of the way to school. With every swing of his foot, he expects her to turn around and lecture him about being respectful of her and of school property but she doesn't. As soon as the bus pulls up to McKinley Junior High, she bolts off with her head down and he doesn't see her again for the rest of the day.
He tries to talk to her as they're stepping off the bus on their street that afternoon and she finally relents and lets him apologize. He wants to tell her that she looks really pretty but Finn already told her that this morning and he's afraid she'll just think he's copying. So he just tells her he'll see her later and he disappears inside his house, leaving her on the street staring after him.
…
They end up not talking much that year at all. She stays friends with Finn but whenever they try to talk to each other, he just ends up saying something stupid and making her mad at him. And she never shuts up about her dreams or her future and really, he gets tired of hearing about it. He doesn't care about all that stupid stuff because that will all happen when they're grown up. But he's a kid and kids worry about video games and girls and music and being cool. He doesn't like it, though, when he hears other kids making fun of Rachel in the hallway. No, they don't really hang out or even talk much at school but she's…she's Rachel and so it bugs him.
When he's fifteen, becoming popular is the only thing he cares about in the whole world. If he's popular, he can rule the school and he wants that kind of power. And while he wants to be accepted, all Rachel wants to do is stand out. Unfortunately for her, it puts a big bull's-eye on her back. Puck normally leaves her alone because he's known her for so long and she's always kinda been his friend. But then Quinn Fabray and Santana Lopez tell him that the easiest way to be seen as cool is to embarrass that "freaky Berry girl" and something inside him shifts. The first slushie slides from his cup and onto Rachel's face so fast that he doesn't even realize what he's done until it's over. The whole hallway is full of kids laughing at her and he feels like he's going to get sick but then Santana jerks the cup from his hand and shoves him against the lockers as she kisses him and he honestly forgets about everything but the fact that he's just found the ticket to getting laid.
Later, he's playing basketball in his driveway when Rachel gets home from dance lessons. Her dad says hello to him but Rachel just storms away and pretends he's not there. Guilt creeps into his mind and stays there until the next day when Santana whispers in his ear what she'll do to him if he slushies Rachel again. So he does. But right before the freezing blue liquid hits her face, he sees the look in her eyes and almost stops. Hormones outweigh ethical decisions, though, and he chucks it at her anyway. His stomach hurts so bad afterward that he has to go take deep breaths in one of the bathroom stalls for fifteen minutes. When he finally feels a little bit better, he decides to skip math class (because that's the one class he has with Rachel) and go take a nap in the nurse's office.
She doesn't speak to him for the rest of the year. He tells himself that they haven't really been friends for years anyway so it doesn't matter. But he watches her from a distance and sometimes catches himself wishing things were different. Because she's hot now, in her own way, and she knows him and he thinks that she'd be a pretty cool girl to date. But she's the opposite of cool and that makes her off limits.
Sometimes, he dreams about her, though. When he wakes up, he's usually breathing heavy and he has messy sheets and a sticky stomach. And then he goes to school and he pictures her like she is in his dreams and his stomach starts aching all over again. Then she gets another slushie in the face. He thinks it balances things out that way.
And he never goes back to math class unless he absolutely has to.
When he's sixteen, he does a lot of stupid shit that he'll regret letter. But he also makes some decisions that will impact his life later on, too. He turns his mowing business into a pool cleaning business because he can make way more money. And that's when he realizes that there are a lot of moms in town that think he's hot and want to fuck him. So he does because he's 16 and he looks good and he can. He fucks a lot of moms and a lot of Cheerios because there's only so much to do in Lima.
And that's how he becomes a father. He fucks his best friend's girl because he's 16 and he's invincible and there's no such thing as rules. But instead of feeling like he owns the world afterwards, he just feels like an asshole. And then he finds out that she's pregnant and his entire world shifts on its axis and he wonders why the fuck he always makes such stupid decisions. He joins the Glee Club with Finn so that he can keep an eye on Quinn and his baby. That puts him back in Rachel's life. He can't avoid her anymore and he's actually glad because now, she can't avoid him, either. And he stops throwing slushies at her because she's the star of the club and he knows that they have to get along. She even starts speaking to him again after he's been in the club for a few weeks.
And then he has yet another stupid dream about her (and this one's tame, for once) and decides that dating good, Jewish Rachel Berry will make his mother happy. It only lasts a week because he can tell that she wishes he were someone else. He recognizes when a girl is in love with his best friend because half the girls at McKinley are. But he finally gets to kiss her and it's pretty awesome. She's really willing and ready to make out, even though she's kind of a prude when it comes to doing anything beyond kissing. He even gets to play his guitar and sing in front of the whole club because of her and honestly, it feels really fucking good. So when she dumps him a few days later, he lets her go even though he's not sure he wants to. She makes him feel better about himself and she's even forgiven him for making her so miserable with all the slushies (it's funny what a taste of his own medicine will do.) But he has his own drama to deal with and dragging Rachel into it will only make things worse.
Right before summer break begins, Quinn goes into labor. It's fast and quick and he sees things that he's not sure he ever wants to see again. But then she's born and for five minutes, he gets to hold the most beautiful baby girl he's ever seen. He's a dad. He's someone's fucking father. It scares the shit out of him but the little girl is so gorgeous and she looks just like Quinn.
Later, he stands at the nursery and can't find the words to tell Quinn that yes, he does want to keep her. He wants to raise her and teach her how to ride a bike and push her on the swings and walk her to her first day of kindergarten. But Quinn doesn't want those same things and he knows he can't do it alone. Quinn asks him if he loves her and he says yes without ever taking his eyes off his daughter. Yeah, the whole thing is fucked up but that baby girl looks like the only thing he's ever done right so for that, he loves Quinn. And when Shelby Corcoran wants to adopt his baby girl, he lets her, even though it fucking guts him. His hand shakes so bad when he's signing the papers that his signature is barely legible but it doesn't matter because it's done. He and Quinn leave the hospital alone, confused and scared and broken. And Shelby leaves with a little baby that's half him and half Quinn and has his whole heart.
...
Rachel finds him sitting on the curb three days after Beth is born. He's drinking from a bottle of Jack and he tries to pass it over to her when she sits down. She shakes her head no but then sighs so loudly that he turns to look at her. She looks as shitty as he feels. And that's when it hits him that her mother is raising his daughter.
"Fucking sucks, don't it?" he asks her.
She nods and crosses her arms over her knees. "Yes."
Even with that one word, he hears the tears in her voice. He sits the bottle down and slides his hand across her back. She jumps slightly at his touch but when he starts rubbing her back, gently stroking his hand up and down her spine, she sighs and lets him. They both tilt their heads and stare up at the stars. He's thinking about Beth and Quinn and Shelby and he knows that she's thinking about it, too.
"She'll be well cared for, Noah," Rachel offers after a few minutes. "And I'm sure that Shelby will make sure that Beth knows about you and Quinn and that you both loved her."
Puck knows she's right. He knows that Shelby can give Beth everything he would never be able to. And it makes his stomach hurt in a weird way because Rachel knows what he's feeling even without him saying anything. His hand slides across her back and tightens on her hip, squeezing reassuringly. "And you don't need her, Rach. You've done just fine for 16 years with two dads. And they love you more than ten Shelbys ever could."
Rachel doesn't say anything, just nods. And then she leans her head on his shoulder and he drops his arm across her waist and they sit there in silence. When a car finally drives down Cooper Street and jolts the both of them out of their daze, they stand up and say their goodbyes.
Puck watches her cross the street and disappear into the shadows of her front yard and tells himself that nothing's changed with Rachel. She's still just this girl he knows.
But he's lying to himself and he knows it. Everything feels different with Rachel after that.
He's glad his mom isn't home that night. It's Friday and the night of the junior prom. He's been listening to Rachel babble about it for weeks. Every afternoon, when she shows up to his house to help him with his stupid calculus homework (it's his hardest class), he listens to Rachel blather on and on about her dress and Finn's tux and how she hopes the music selection isn't horrendous and that she's secretly terrified that Finn will step on her feet while they're dancing. Puck finally tunes her out because really, he doesn't give a fuck. Actually, that's a lie and he knows it. He cares a lot. He's not sure what happened but ever since the night he and Rachel talked about Shelby and Beth, he feels something for her. But she's completely in love with Finn and he's definitely not going down that road again. So he's not going to the prom. It's just a stupid excuse to get all dressed up and then get undressed later when you have sex at the hotel. Well, he can have sex anytime he wants anyway so there's really no point. Besides, he doesn't want to watch Finn and Rachel make out all night, anyway.
But he's sitting on the front porch in the dark, drinking one of his mom's Coors Lights, when he sees the limo stop in front of Rachel's house. Finn gets out and Puck can see that he's nervous because he's pacing back and forth on the street before he finally gets the balls to go up to the house.
About twenty minutes later, Finn comes back outside with Rachel. Puck sits up a little bit and he sees that she's wearing a deep red dress that's really short and, in her heels, her legs look longer than ever. She's looking up at Finn like he's just cured cancer and it makes Puck's stomach roll in revulsion.
When she slides into the limo, he sees her turn and look towards his house before the door closes. And the look on her face is… He can't tell what it is but suddenly, he regrets the fact that he's not going to the prom.
...
He thinks he must have fallen asleep on the porch because when he wakes up again, Rachel is getting out of the same limo. Her hair is partially falling out of its complicated style and he can see the tears on her cheeks being reflected in the street lamp.
"And don't call me, Finn!" he hears her say. He perks up and pushes himself out of the plastic chair, leaning against the post as he watches the limo drive away. Rachel stands in the street corner and Puck sees her wipe a tear off her cheek. She starts to turn toward her house and he realizes he's saying, "Hey, Rach, wait up!" before he can stop himself.
He jogs out into the street and stops in front of her, sliding his hands into his pockets. Her mascara is streaked down her cheeks and her eyes are all puffy. She looks like hell.
"What'd he do?"
Rachel sighs and shakes her head. "He kissed Quinn."
Puck smirks because Finn's really a big fucking idiot. "He did that tonight? At the dance?"
Rachel shakes her head. "No, last weekend at a party. But he and Quinn were acting jumpy around one another so I asked him and he admitted it."
She looks so sad and he really wants to give her a hug (ya know, to be a good friend and maybe, possibly feel a little bit of that tight ass covered in silky fabric). "So, you two break up?"
"I don't know. I told him I needed to think about it."
"Well you don't deserve that shit. You really don't, Rach. You could do better."
Rachel cocks her head at him and smiles sadly. "Really? Who?" He's almost ready to tell her, "Well, there's me," but before he can, she shakes her head and says, "This is Lima. Finn is pretty much as good as it gets around here."
Her words take a minute to sink in and after they do, he really doesn't feel like consoling her anymore. So he shrugs, tries hard not to show that he's pissed (hurt), and says, "Whatever. You'll be made up by tomorrow." And before she can answer, he turns on his heel and stalks back to his house.
He hears her call his name just as he's slamming the front door and he chooses to ignore her instead of running back out there to see what else she wants. She said all she needed to say as far as he's concerned.
He goes upstairs to his room and kicks off his shoes. Then he picks one up and throws it across the room because he feels like breaking something. He's really fucking tired of her never really seeing him. He's got his shit under control now and he's actually fucking trying but it's not like she ever fucking notices. Sure, she rolls her eyes at him when he says stupid (and funny) shit but she never really seems to care about the stuff he does right. And just thinking about that fact makes him angrier than before.
It's not until she makes him feel like the biggest piece of shit there is that he accepts the fact that, maybe, he's a little bit in love with her. And this feels way different than what he felt for Quinn.
In September of his senior year, he finally grows enough balls to ask her out. He doesn't expect her to say yes because the words she said the night of the junior prom still ring in his ears but when she does, he smiles and tells her that she won't regret it.
He takes her to dinner and to the movies and he holds her hand. Once they're back, parked at the curb in front of her house, they sit in the truck and make small talk. He slides across the seat to kiss her chastely (even though he's half-hard just from smelling her perfume) and she catapults herself into his lap, latching his lips to hers. She whispers, "Can we go somewhere?" against his lips and he feels himself nodding. Five minutes later, he pries her off his lap, adjusts the bulge in his pants, and backs the truck back out of the driveway.
They sleep together for the first time that night. He hates that he can't take her to a bed but his sleeping bag and a soft patch of grass next to a smoldering fire out at the old, abandoned Boys Scout camp will have to do. Her hair is falling over her shoulders and her lips are swollen from their kisses and when he finally rolls off her, she curls against him and they both stare up at the cloud-filled sky.
"I've wanted to do that since we were fifteen," he admits.
She giggles against him and places a soft kiss against his chest before sighing and closing her eyes. He tangles his fingers in her hair and tilts her head back so that he can kiss her again. He can't get enough of her. She's soft but firm and gentle but insistent and he thinks that having her like this, all fire and sweetness, is the best thing that's ever happened to him.
..
They date through all of senior year. She tells him she loves him in March when there's snow on the ground and they're building a snowman with his sister. He can't even pinpoint when he first fell in love with her and, other than what he told Quinn as they gazed down at the child that was, for a brief time, their daughter, he's never been able to feel enough to say those words to any girl. But he says it to Rachel and it feels very different than when he said it to Quinn. He knows it's real this time and she throws her arms around him and they kiss right in his front yard, the sound of Sarah making gagging noises in the background.
Later that night, when her legs are curled around his as he strokes her his fingers gently across her hip, over and over again, she talks about "the future" and it doesn't scare him. No, they won't be going to the same colleges (him at OSU and her at NYU) but he thinks they can make it work. It's going to be hard and there are going to be a million obstacles and he's not sure how they'll tackle them but he knows they will. And he has no idea how often they'll get to see one another, either. All he does know is that he loves her enough to make it work.
She breaks up with him during their sophomore year of college. The long distance thing sucks and they're both so busy trying to keep up their grades that their relationship starts to suffer. They spend most of their time missing each other's calls and when they finally do connect, most of it is spent arguing. But ending things with her and pretending that she's not part of his life anymore never crosses his mind. So when they're both home for winter break and standing on the sidewalk in front of her house fighting for yet another stupid reason and she tells him that they should just break up for good, he doesn't see it coming. It hits him like a fist in the gut and he feels sick. Every single thing that has ever happened to him that mattered, in some way, had to do with her. They made promises of "forever" when they were 18 and now, just two years later, she's telling him that those are the promises of children and that he needs to be realistic. He wants to fight for her. He wants to beg her to change her mind and promise that he'll work harder at keeping their phone dates and responding to emails. But he hears the determination in her voice and sees it on her face and realizes that it's the same determination that's guided her towards everything she's ever tackled and he knows that he's lost the battle. And he's never been one to beg so he lets her go and pretends that it doesn't matter. He even tells himself that she's right. He's loved her since he was a child and fuck it, he's a man now. He's not the same person he was when he tugged at her pigtails or tripped her on the sidewalk or even chucked slushies in her face. He can't expect them to be the same people they were when they were kids and he first noticed that she was different in the best possible way. He's grown and changed and become someone who's probably going to do something with himself.
The shitty part of all of it, though, is that he has her to thank for it. And now he can't.
He can't believe he's back in Lima. He comes home only when he has to and even when he's here, he doesn't stay long. But Artie's just had some experimental surgery that, while it won't free him from the confines of his wheelchair for good, it will help him begin to use his legs again. Artie's been his bro since they were 16 so yeah, he comes home to show support.
There are cars up and down the street outside the Abrams house when he pulls up. He sees Finn's piece-of-shit car and Kurt's nice ride and realizes that most of the Gleeks will probably be inside. He surveys the street and doesn't see Rachel's car. He's relieved because they haven't spoken since the day they broke up two years ago. He thinks about her pretty much every day but he's moved on. He's had a few girlfriends and more than a few hook-ups in those two years. He never lets anyone talk about her, though, because he doesn't want to hear about her new boyfriend or, God forbid, her fiancé. She was his first real love and he knows that she'll always mean something to him because of that. But he's over her. He's been over her for a long time.
When he steps inside Artie's house, it's crowded with people. He makes eye contact with Mike and works his way through the throng of people to bump fists with his old friend. He finds himself looking for a short, big-mouthed brunette but he doesn't see her. He hates that it disappoints him so much but then again, she's probably already on Broadway so why would she be here? So he heads upstairs to Artie's room, squeezes in with the well-wishers surrounding him as he recovers, and makes small talk. After promising to get together with Finn, Sam, Kurt, and Mike later for a beer, he excuses himself and gets the hell out of there before he runs into Quinn or, Lord help him, Santana.
When he gets home, his mom's not there. Sarah's at one of her friend's houses and he has the place to himself. He pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it into the grass before jogging into the garage to grab one of his old basketballs. He dribbles on the concrete and decides that, even though it's a little flat, it'll do. He's in the middle of a shot when a car pulls into Rachel's driveway across the street. As he's snagging the ball, he sees a long pair of legs slide from the driver's side and lets out a groan. Great.
He's not going to pay any attention to her. They don't have anything to say to each other anyway. So he jumps and shoots and then grabs the ball again. When he looks up, she's standing in the middle of the street, her hand on her hip while she stares him down.
"Rachel."
She takes a few more steps and then she's standing at the edge of his yard. "Hello, Noah. How are you?"
Puck drops the ball in the grass and snags his shirt to wipe the sweat from his face. Then he pulls it back over his body and grabs the ball again before he answers her. "Fine. You?"
"I'm… I'm well."
He sees her big brown eyes studying his face and he wants to laugh. She's wearing a pink dress and a pair of shiny black pumps and he can't help but remember the first time he ever saw her. She was in pink then, too. But instead of the gangly and skinny girl she was, now he just sees a fit and gorgeous woman. She looks so goddamn beautiful standing in his driveway and his stomach burns the same way it always has when she's around. He knows what it feels like to love Rachel Berry and that same feeling is back. He doesn't want to love her again. He wants to fight against it.
He turns quickly to go inside because but she stops him with a quiet, "Can we talk?"
He has to think for a moment because he's not sure he wants to. She's always had too much power over him, though, because as soon as she adds, "please?" he's stepping toward her and then past her to drop down and sit on the curb.
He watches her struggle to sit down like a lady and finally she just kicks off her pumps and holds her skirt around her thighs as she sinks down onto the concrete with him. When he looks into her eyes, he sees the apology that he's about to hear.
And as they sit together on Cooper Street, catching up on what's happened over the past two years and eventually discussing why they broke up in the first place, he accepts the fact that he's already lost the fight. The worst part of it all, he thinks, is that he never really stopped loving her in the first place.
He thinks she's crazy when she tells him that she wants to get married in Lima. He's pretty sure that the New York smog has eaten away her brain when she tells him that she wants to have her wedding on Cooper Street.
"Babe, that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard" is his biggest and best argument. They're lying in bed in the tiny apartment they've shared for the past several years and, ever since he proposed, the wedding is her favorite topic. He loves that she's so excited about marrying him. He keeps thinking that she's going to wake up, realize he's an asshole, and call the whole thing off like she did when they were 20. He never voices is worries, though, because he doesn't want to put any ideas in her head.
"But Noah, it's where we met. And if you think about it, so many important aspects of our life happened on Cooper Street. Our lives were intertwined because of that street."
Puck has to admit that she's right. But he still thinks that getting married in the middle of a street is borderline nuts.
…
They compromise and she gets to hold the wedding in her fathers' front yard, just a few feet from Cooper Street. As he watches her walk down the aisle of lush green grass in a white dress sparkling with crystal beads, he can't help but think about the Rachel Berry that he met when he was nine. She plowed into his life when she was all legs, elbows, and dreams. Seventeen years later, she's finally going to be his. His ring. His name. His.
That's the funny thing about growing up. It happens so fast that most of it's a blur. But the important memories stick around. It just so happens that, for him, a lot of his most important memories are hers, too.