Knock, Knock, Knock ,,Penny"
Knock, Knock, Knock ,,Penny"
Knock, Knock, Knock ,,Penny"
I was standing in the kitchen, making a cup of coffee, when I heard Sheldon's knocking ritual.
"Come in, Sheldon. The door is open."
The door opened and Sheldon entered my apartment uncertainly. He looked around nervously, then he looked up at me.
"Hello Penny. Leonard told me that you both will marry soon and I wanted to congratulate you. "
Sheldon came closer and stopped a few feet away from me. Somehow he behaved strangely and he looked different than usual. He wore a dark suit shirt and his hair was a bit confused. It was something that I sympathetically acknowledged, though in itself it was an alarming sign. Sheldon had strict dress codes and his hair was never in disorder, it was always perfect, even though he was just waking up. Nevertheless, I was pleased to see him a little more relaxed and the shirt was really good.
"Thanks sweetie, but that does not look like you. What about you?"
"Amy said that if a good friend has good news, you should be happy for him ..."
"Are you looking forward to it or are you just saying that because social convention dictates that?" I wanted to know.
"Honestly, I have not realized until now that your relationship with Leonard is so profound that it could lead to a marriage."
"What do you mean?" I wanted to know a little bit angry. Was that an insult or just a statement?
"Well, I thought there were other possibilities that you might not have considered yet."
"And what options should that be, in your opinion?"
He stared at his shoes and pinched his mouth for a moment. Then he looked up and straight into my eyes.
"Maybe there are other male individuals around you that you might be interested in?"
"I love Leonard, there's no one else," I said emphatically, though suddenly I was not so sure.
Sheldon came slowly closer. He reached for my hands. I feel paralyzed and stared at him in disbelief.
Then he leaned forward so far that his lips almost touched my ear. "Are you sure?"
I woke up completely irritated and I realized that I was totally sweaty. My damp clothes and wet pillow made me shiver.
"Penny what happened?" Leonard asked in shock as he reached for his glasses and turned on the reading light.
"All right, I just had a nightmare."
"Okay, go to sleep." He turned around, put his glasses down and turned off the light before falling asleep again.
After an estimated two minutes, I heard his calm breathing, which told me he was asleep. But I could not sleep again now and looked at the clock.
2:43
Reluctantly I got up and walked over to the kitchen. There I made a tea, as I felt my stomach cramp. Lost in thought, I stood at the window and sipped my tea gently. The dark apartment and the silence hit me pretty much and I had, without my insomnia, enough problems.
I would have thought that I had to be happy. I had a great job as a pharmaceutical rep and a wonderful fiancé, who made almost every wish come to me.
But it was not like that. Of course I had said "yes" when Leonard made me the request, after all. We had known each other for so long and in the last five years there had been a lot of ups and downs that we had mastered together.
But as soon as I found the time to think about it, my "yes" seemed to me to be more and more wrong. Why had I just agreed?
The more time passed, the more insecure I became and more recently my stomach also rebelled. At night, horrible stomach pains kept me awake, if not for crazier dreams. Today both problems got me out of bed together.
The tea seemed to calm my stomach a bit and I decided to buy a pack of Rennie in the morning. My thoughts wandered to the other topic that bothered me a lot. Even though it had only been a dream, it had felt odd to be so close to Sheldon and I did not understand what the dream should tell me. That Sheldon was not overly excited about engagements or other big events was well known to me and everyone else, and it had something to do with his social ineptitude. He was just afraid of change.
I had to yawn and now I felt how exhausted I am. I caught myself thinking that I would like to know how the dream would have gone on if I had not woken up.