Ma Chérie Anna Marie by Eve-the-Charlotte
Summary: In which Remy E. LeBeau finally gets the girl. He also sets the Mansion's kitchen on fire, pisses off Wolverine, and interrupts some poor couple's date. But, hey, who's really counting that?
Pairings: Romy (Remy/Rouge), with implied Victor/Logan (Sabretooth/Wolverine), Kodd (Todd/Kurt), and a mystery couple (not from Marvel universe, but you get a free one-shot for that particular show if you guess the show and the couple right)
Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men: Evolution, but I do own the Witchblood series and a couple of other one-shots!
"No way, Swamp Rat."
"Do it and die, Gambit!"
"DIE, YOU CAJUN BASTARD!"
All those things and more were said multiple times in answer to Remy's one and only question. And, yes, the all caps in the last response was justified, just ask those who were there. Yet, again and again, he kept crawling back to his Earth-bound goddess, his amour, his Anna Marie. She could scream at him, beat him, ignore him, drain his very life from his body and Remy would keep coming back for more. Most would never understand it, but Sort, that mischievous mistress, decided to make the Cajun her play-thing, which led to his current predicament.
He was currently kneeling down on one knee, with his chere staring down at him with abject horror, while a rather tall somehow off blonde woman cooed at the table next to his and Anna Marie's.
It all started when Remy had attempted to bake his angee some pastries. . .
Remy hummed a cheery tune as he observed his cake rising in the oven. He knew his femme loved sweets, as he observed in his daily accounts of her behavior. And, no, it was not stalking, not matter what the feline throwback said. Speaking of feline throwbacks, he noticed the one he knew coming toward the kitchen. Since his revenge on the cat-like man had already been enacted and he had not yet been caught, Remy decided to continue that streak of luck by hiding behind the island in the middle of the kitchen.
Remy poke his head up as he heard odd-sounding groans, moans, and growls emitting from the other side of the kitchen. Remember that old phrase "What has been seen can never be unseen?" Remy believed whoever said it had had seen the image that was burned into his brain in mind. Why, Dieu, why did he have to see the two throwbacks mauling each other sexually? What did he do that was so wrong, other than stealing, lying, and cheating in that poker game with St. John? Remy was so caught up in his mental angsting that his heart almost forgot to stop beating when Wolverine looked behind the island and caught a glimpse of the Cajun.
The roar of "Cajun" was heard probably in China as the horrifying "snickt" reached said Cajun's ears. Fortunately for the one codenamed Gambit, the oven caught on fire at that exact moment.
This led to Remy's great escape, which mostly consisted of Wolverine's concentration snapping for a second and Remy managed to wiggle out of the man's grasp and run like the Diable was after him. Thanks to Remy's connections, he managed to make it to the Brotherhood Boarding House and crash on the couch there.
After Remy woke up the next day and had his coffee, he concocted his latest and greatest plan. He would sneak up on Anna Marie at her favorite coffee shop at one o'clock, where she would definitely be. Remy would have to thank Toad for that tidbit, in addition to letting him stay the night. Not that the grenouille had a choice, as Remy had some choice blackmail on him. Remy would never use it, as it might affect his chances of getting into the family, but holding Toad's relationship with Kurt over the boy was fun.
All of the above led to the beginning scene, with Remy kneeling on the ground, Rouge frozen in horror for some reason, and that odd woman squealing over the apparent "cuteness" of the scene. Remy then realized what the position he was in looked like and prompting got up.
"What Remy wants to ask his chérie is if she would like to go on a date with him," he asked, hoping he hadn't already completely traumatized the girl.
Anna Marie, better known as Rogue, narrowed her eyes and asked an infamous question, "How do Ah know ya won' cheat on me with that girl," pointing to the strange blonde woman, "or anyone else for that mattah?"
"Because, chere," he bowed to her at that, "you have mon cœur. Besides, there's something's not quite right 'bout that femme."
There was dead silence as the self-proclaimed Rogue seemed to ponder his declaration. Anna Marie then smiled as she kindly said, "Ah'll take yar word for it, Swamp Rat. Sure Ah'll go out with ya."
Remy suddenly grinned widely and genuinely, before he swept up a protesting Anna Marie in his arms and sped out of the restaurant. Meanwhile, the blonde "woman" from the other table smiled, until something the two had said worked into the "woman's" brain and caused "her" bright blue eyes to dull and for "her" to frown slightly.
"Hey, hon, I've got a question," "she" asked "her" companion, a man of equal height with orange-tipped dark blonde hair and oddly violet eyes, who had been previously devouring his pancakes, in an oddly low voice for a woman even of her stature.
"What's that, ange," the man inquired in return, curious about what exactly his date looked confused about.
"I'm not sure if I should be offended that that guy thought I was a girl, or relieved that he didn't hit on me," the blonde man asked his boyfriend, "I mean, do I look that much like a girl. I know I'm wearing a skirt, but still."
"I just think you look beau, chéri, and that you shouldn't worry about what some ignorant citizen of yours thinks. All that matters is that Je t'aime, right?"
"You're right, and I love you too, honey."
So, the couple continued dining peacefully, until that weird woman from earlier came stomping back in with the now unconscious Cajun with her, muttering something lethal-sounding under her breath. But, that didn't matter, since the pair of blondes were used to such things.
And so everyone lived happily ever after.
*REMYKISSEDROGUEANDREMYLOVEDIT*
This was fun! Anyways, read and review. Also, a hint to reviewers interested in the possible prize is that I have written in the fandom the blonde couple is from. Can you guess who they are and where they're from? Again, free one-shot for that fandom to whoever guesses it right! Please leave details of said one-shot in the review.
Also, before I go, here are the
French to English Translations:
Ma Chérie - my darling
amour - love
Sort - Fate
chere - dear
ange/angee - angel
femme - woman
Dieu - God
Diable - Devil
grenouille - frog
mon cœur - my heart
beau - beautiful
Je t'aime - I love you
Update: To my dear reviewer, close but no cigar.