I knew that I should have said no when Molly invited me. No, not Molly, Mrs. Weasley as I need to start calling her. It is too awkward between Ron and me. I guess that the only reasons I came were so that I could spend time with Harry without us being wrapped up trying to find the Horcruxes and for Mol—Mrs. Weasley's great cooking. My parents were skiing once again and I had thought about going with them but I knew that my place was with Harry so that if anything happened I would be right there to help. My parents understood and had left me alone for Christmas. I was an adult now. I did not need them to watch over me all the time.
'And you came for Charlie' drifted a thought from the back of my mind. I quickly pushed the thought away. I did not come for Charlie. That would be absurd. There is absolutely no reason for me to come for Charlie. I came purely for Harry and Mrs. Weasley's cooking. Besides the fact that I did not want to spend Christmas alone. I never had and I didn't plan to. My apartment was lonely. It was not that big but did not have a cozy homey feel. It was probably because I did not have anybody to share it with.
It was bad enough that I have to see Ron every day at the Ministry when I work but why did I decide to spend all of my lovely Christmas with Ron? I just had to find the one way to ruin the first Christmas I had experienced where I had a choice of what to do on Christmas day. Usually the only choice was spending it with my parents. But now I am an adult even in the Muggle world and I can go anywhere I want to.
My Christmas was no longer at all good. It was so awful that it just made me want to cry but I knew I could not. I am a strong young woman and I cannot cry. Especially in front of him. No, there is no reason for me not to cry in front of him. I told myself this but I do not believe it. I do not believe it for one second. He would not make fun of me if I cried in front of him. He was not that kind of guy. He was sweet and kind and the most wonderful guy on the planet but no, I am not allowed to think that way. Because I do not like him. He is merely a person that happens to be in the house but he belonged there. Not like me. That was not my place. I should have just stayed at my apartment for Christmas. The people that really cared for me would have visited me. Then I would not have to deal with the people I am uncomfortable around. Or to say, comfortable around but I am not supposed to be comfortable around them.
But I suppose that I am getting ahead of myself. I am sure that you have no idea what I am talking about. So I will tell you the beginning of the story instead of starting in the middle. This is my story. The story of a bookworm with a complicated life.