*Warning spoilers from both ME3 and Avengers!*
This Shenko fanfic is dedicated to one of my dearest friends! The hint came to mind because of the 'fight' between me and her, who loves Captain America while I totally adore Iron Man. So I started wondering about associating the Avengers cast to the characters of Mass Effect and then… here's my story!
I wrote it a year ago, so I apologize if it isn't very well written, it was one of my first attempts in composing in English! I decided to check it again now because of a render I've made, and I'm posting it with the help of another lovely friend of mine, my bb Schizolyn from Tumblr, who corrected my horrible mistakes!
It is set post ME3, after my fic "Somewhere."
Just to be clear, I love all the Avengers, there's no intent in this fic to mistreat Captain America (God bless Chris Evans!), it's just a joke! ;)
Hope you'll enjoy it! ^_^
Finally, after a whole day of hard work, Major Alenko is free to rush towards the only place where he really wants to be, near the love of his life.
It's been a month since Shepard woke up from her coma, a month full of joy for Kaidan who had spent weeks before her awakening almost dying because he was so scared to lose her again. But she came back to him and now she's recovering very fast from her terrible injuries.
The Reapers' war is over thanks to her and Kaidan has all the purpose to not waste a single day of his new life without her, so here he is almost running toward her hospital room.
Oddly, when he enters he notices disappointed that there's no one in there. 'What…?' he thinks surprised, but soon he remembers the message Shepard sent him that morning,
'Since you'll be busy all day, Joker has invited me to his room to watch some good old vids. I'll be waiting for you to return to me. 3'
Joker is also recovering in this hospital because of his Vrolik syndrome he suffered several injuries during the last battle after the Normandy was attacked by Harbinger. Kaidan is glad that they have close bedrooms, so they can enjoy each others' company.
So he turns and heads toward Joker's place nearby, but as he reaches the door he stops, there are different voices coming from inside.
"No, no, no Lola… you are definitely Captain America!" Vega's tone sounds very amused.
"Oooooh stop with that James! No way! I'm Iron Man!" Shepard replies annoyed, while Joker is laughing out loud at them.
"Hey Lieutenant, don't make my girl upset, otherwise I'll have to kick your ass!" Kaidan enters the room and Shepard's face lights up immediately, staring at him with her awesome smile. She is sitting on a wheelchair near Joker's bed and James on a couch at the other side.
"Kaidan!" she raises her right arm towards him, the hand she is able to move properly at the moment. He almost jumps near her taking her hand and bringing it to his cheek while he leans on her to kiss her lips passionately.
"Ehi ehi, guys calm down remember that you are not alone!" Joker teases the two lovers.
"Kaidan I'm so happy you're here, I've missed you so much!" Shepard is still smirking at him and Alenko feels his entire body melting at her sight. Since she's been back from her coma she always smiles at him with this look full of sweetness, happiness, love, and he almost can't believe this isn't a dream. Probably she has the same awareness that they are finally free from the pain and suffering the war brought them and from the fear of the loss, so that she can finally enjoy every moment of her life. And she seems to like all the moments they spend together.
"Me too my love…" he says to her with the same adoring eyes and then he turns to the other two, keeping his fingers entwined with hers, "So what's happening? And what are you doing here James?"
"I have a couple of days of shore leave, so I wanted to see how's my N7 trainer-to-be doing and here I am stuck in a marathon session of old superheroes movies!"
"Yes, we already finished watching 'Captain America' and right before that we watched 'Iron Man' 1 & 2 and 'Thor'. You're in time to watch the ultimate masterpiece, 'The Avengers'!" Joker explains to him excited.
"I'm sorry but I have no idea what you're talking about," Kaidan confesses.
"Oh… my… God! Commander, how can you date a men who doesn't know anything about Marvel's superheroes?!" the pilot looks shocked at Shepard who starts to laugh.
"Well Lieutenant, nobody's perfect! That means that I have a lot of work to do to make him aware about the Marvel's universe!" she blinks at him.
"Mmm maybe I should enjoy that! But… Why were you arguing with James?" Kaidan looks back to her, but soon he regrets that question, her smile disappears and she starts to glance at James with an angry look. "That… fool keeps telling me that I'm Captain America, but it's obvious that I am Iron Man!"
"Lola, don't deceive yourself you are the brave and powerful hero of the entire galaxy, you're our Captain Galaxy!"
Kaidan can't understand the problem… "Why don't you like this Captain America, baby?"
"Well, he is so boring, he represents the traditional cliché of blond and muscular American superhero and the intelligence isn't his strong point. And why is he a superhero? Only because they drugged him like hell! Instead Iron Man is awesome, his intelligence and his strong character made him the real great superhero, with all his merits and his imperfections. He is a real man, a real super-man! And I am like him!"
"Lola, do you really feel like a billionaire vain playboy?" James can't hold his chuckles.
"Well… I used to be… a 'playgirl'! Don't you know?" the Commander sneers at him and Kaidan is caught surprise.
"Oh yes sure Lola, ahahah!"
"Feel free not to believe me, but I had great times, especially during my N7 training!" her grin turns to be evil.
"Lola! Don't you feel ashamed to speak like that in front of the Major?" the muscular soldier is almost crying from laugher.
"Come on James, don't you think he had a woman before me? It is impossible, with his handsome face, his awesome body, and his amazing butt… I'm pretty sure he always had thousands of ladies at his feet!" she turns to smile at Kaidan, who blushes very upset.
"Shepard, I can't believe you're saying things like that!"
"Yeah, Major Kaidan 'the Butt' Alenko!" Joker adds to it.
They all tackle at poor Kaidan who's thinking about running away from that band of crazy people. But seeing his lover so amused like she never had during those past months made him change his mind.
"Ah-ah you are all jealous, that's the point!" he provokes the two men hoping to stop their jokes, "So returning to the main subject the problem is that you two don't agree about Shepard being Iron Man? And who do you think James is, baby?"
"Hulk!" she promptly answers making James grunt and Joker laughing even louder than before.
"Well, I think we should watch the movie and let Kaidan decide who is right, shouldn't we?" Joker affirms trying to recompose himself.
"No way, I am right. Lola and Captain America share the same history too, they both seemed to be dead for years and then they came back to life!"
Listening to Vega's words makes Alenko's blood freeze in his veins. He almost doesn't have the heart to look at Shepard whose expression is totally serious and cold.
The silence invades the room, only a low "Shit!" comes out from James when he realizes what he just said. The Commander never liked to think about the time she spent dead and her rebuilding by Cerberus scientists. Obviously neither Kaidan wanted to remember how devastating was for him the loss of her…
STONK!
A noise wakes him from his thoughts. Joker has thrown a glass against James, "You fucking idiot. Stop saying nonsense and let's watch the movie!" he turns to Shepard blinking to her. She relaxes a bit and nods to him.
Kaidan feels relieved, so he takes a chair near her wheelchair, he sits and he surrounds her shoulders slowly with his arm. She leans her head into the crook of his neck smiling again and then the vid starts.
The movie proves to be so fascinating since the beginning. There are a lot of things that Alenko can't understand, but the others promptly update him.
"Here she is, the Black Widow… I can't stop thinking about Miranda looking at her!" Joker says to entertain Shepard.
"Well, of course their suits are almost the same!" she agrees giggling.
"But let's talk about Loki, he's definitely the Illusive Man!" he continues.
"Oh my God, you're damn right!" James replies shocked.
"Loki is surely more attractive, but they have a lot of features in common!" Shepard nods.
"Attractive? Do you like that kind of man?" Kaidan questions her surprised.
"Who knows…?" she sneers naughtily at him and then she kisses his lips. "Maybe once… But now I definitely prefer the 'boy-scout' kind of man, you know…" she winks.
"Hey hey stop flirting, Commander!" Joker pokes her.
"What about Nick Fury? Isn't he our badass Admiral Anderson?" she sighs thinking about her old friend, who's now resting in peace "And clearly Garrus is Hawkeye! Old style sniper FTW!"
Finally Hulk appears and Kaidan bursts into laughter. "Oh yes, my girl is totally right! James you ARE Hulk! Ahahah! Maybe a little bit Wrex too!" Shepard and Joker join him while Vega mutters incomprehensible words.
The time goes by and they keep having fun with the movie, but at last the ending is near. Iron Man has taken the nuclear bomb and he is flying toward the dimensional portal to save the city of New York from the explosion. He understands that he's going to die and the only thing he can think about is to call his love, Pepper to say goodbye to her, but she doesn't answer.
The Major looks to his lover who's holding her breath by emotion. Iron Man hurls the bomb against the Chitauri and then he starts to fall in the open space while the portal to the Earth is getting closed. Kaidan stopped inhaling too.
He manages to pass through the portal a second before it closes, but when Hulk saves him from crashing into the ground he seems to be dead. Alenko feels his heart aching. 'Oh my God, it is like…' and he glimpses again to the Commander who's almost crying.
"UAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Hulk shouts and Iron Man wakes up "WHAT THE HELL?!"
Unexpectedly, the tension in the air vanishes and they all give another hearty chuckle, some tears are moistening Shepard's cheeks – Kaidan quickly dries them out with his lips embracing her.
The vid finishes and they all look at the Major waiting for him to return a verdict. "Guys, I don't know anything about the other movies you watched today, but damn it… Shepard is definitely Iron Man! Shame on you James!" Shepard giggles triumphantly at Vega, despite of her being still moved.
"Well… After that I have to acknowledge my defeat this time…" the Lieutenant admits uncomforted.
"Yeah! I-am-Iron-Maaaaaan! Ta-da-dadadan!" Shepard starts to sing, but then Joker interrupts her "You know what? I think Javik could be Captain America!"
"What? Are you serious? I don't recall Steve Rogers asking to throw someone out of the airlock of the ship!" she answers back.
"Yeah, but they both remained hibernate for a very long time and then they wake up to fight again their old enemies!"
"Mh mh, yes… It makes sense…" Vega agrees "But, guys… We've forgot Thor!"
"Oh no, James, we didn't forget him at all. Thor is the Major!" Shepard points at Kaidan, who seems bewildered "What…?"
"Indeed! He's brave, mighty, but also sensitive, an old time gentleman. Just like you are. And most of all, he's the Asgardian God of thunder! Like your biotics! You're my Biotic God, Alenko!" Shepard grins happy at him while he blushes dreadfully "Don't be shy my love, it is the truth!"
He can't stand it anymore, he leans his head over hers and claims her lips hungrily and she returns the kiss as much as starving as he is, almost forgetting where they are.
"Err… I think it's time for me to go now!" James interrupts them. "Goodbye crazy pilot! Goodbye Miss Stark and… Goodbye Biotic God ahahahah!" and he leaves the room.